by Mikayla Lane
She was making no effort to hide those feelings from him. He suspected she was making sure he had no doubt exactly how she felt. He was also making sure he didn’t hide his sorrow and pain at his actions from her, hoping to sway her decision to stay locked in her quarters.
“Do you honestly expect me to trust you? After what you’ve done? For all, I know you’re going to use what you find in the exam to make sure he’s punished even more! I loved you; I trusted you, and you betrayed me. You betrayed my trust.” Cari paused, trying not to cry.
“Why couldn’t you have talked to me? Why couldn’t you have asked me what I felt, or what was going on? Do you really think so little of me that you thought I would just throw myself at the first man I had a chance to be alone with? Did you think that because I’m half human that I was going to turn into some slut who would give myself to just anyone?”
She couldn’t stop the tears from flowing. How could he think so little of her? She wanted to be with Scaden. She needed to be with him. Only he seemed to understand how she felt. He was her mate, how could he not?
“Cari, I could never think that of you. Please honey, please open the door.”
Randor slid down the door until he was sitting on the floor. Head in his hands, he let his own tears flow. Her pain and betrayal beat at his soul. If only he had thought through what he had done before he’d convinced Gracus and Amun to contact the council. He didn’t have any idea why they hadn’t received the Ator-Ma, but if they had just waited and examined them, they may have had a chance to find out.
He looked up when he felt the hand on his shoulder. Seeing the defeat in the eyes of Gracus and Amun, he knew that they had also failed to get Scaden to convince her to let them in her quarters.
He silently took Amun’s offered hand and allowed the man to pull him to his feet, and followed the two men down the corridor and into the lift. None of them spoke while they headed from the lift into the MedLab several levels below Cari and Scaden’s quarters.
Randor collapsed into the first seat he found when they entered the room. He didn’t even look up when he heard Amun tell the MedLab staff to get out.
“I’m at a loss. I can’t reach her. She doesn’t trust me anymore and to be honest; I don’t blame her.”
Randor said brokenly, trying to hold back the pain he felt at what he had unwittingly done to hurt his daughter. Looking up, he saw their eyes glued to the comm screen showing them Cari and Scaden’s quarters. As if on cue, Cari crawled into the shower unit, lay down and pressed her body as close to the wall as possible, while Scaden moved into his clothes closet and did the same.
Randor didn’t know if either Cari or Scaden knew that the other was pressed against the same wall, in the identical spot, but he had a feeling they did. He had a feeling that they both were doing whatever they needed to do in order to be close to one another.
“How do they know that? I mean Scaden probably knows that the wall is shared between their quarters, but how does she know? How does she know he’s doing the same thing? Can one of you explain to me how the hell they are doing these things if they are not mates?”
Gracus demanded of Amun and Randor in frustration. He couldn’t believe the things they had been seeing the last few days. He even had the computer calculate the odds of them doing these things in sync to see if maybe if was some random fluke. The calculations were so high as to be astronomical.
There was nothing random about anything they were doing, and watching them act this way and try to be together, was affecting the entire crew. The vid of the two of them in their quarters was on in every room on the ship. Everyone was worried about their captain and his mate.
He had even gone into the dining room last night to try to eat something, and the silence was chilling. Every eye in the room had glared at him before they turned their attention back to watching their commander and Cari on the vid screen. One by one, each man had given him a disgusted look before leaving their food half eaten and walking out the door.
“Right now, I’m getting more worried about their health. The scans only show me basic life functions; heart rate, breathing, brain scans… but we can all see that they aren’t eating enough. Everything else seems to be fine right now, but if this keeps up their health will start to deteriorate.”
“As far as how they are doing this… I have no idea. And until I can get close to one of them, I won’t be able to figure it out either. Have the tech’s figured out how to break through her door yet?” Amun asked Gracus, knowing he had a team trying to figure out how to get into her quarters. Their original idea being to pump a sleep agent into her quarters, get inside and take her to MedLab. However, so far they had no luck in getting that done either.
“Are you serious? I’m surprised the crew hasn’t started a mutiny by now! I can barely get them to keep the ship going, do you really think they are inclined to break into her quarters, so we can keep them farther apart? I can’t blame them either. Watching the two of them is breaking my heart too!”
“If his quarters weren’t locked down by the Council’s own codes, I would have broken in and let him out by now. As it is we can’t let her in, and we can’t get him out even if we wanted to.”
Gracus was serious, punishment; demotion be damned. If he could get his friend out he would. No matter what the crew though, he couldn’t stand to see this go on any longer either. And he knew Amun and Randor felt the same way.
“We have to think of something. This can’t go on for another two Earth weeks while we wait for the ships to arrive. One or both may not make it that long, if they don’t start eating properly. And their mental states… I have no idea what their minds are capable of at this point. I’ve never seen anything like this and have no basis to compare it to. I have no idea if they are able to… make themselves die together.”
There. Amun finally told them his greatest fear of all this. He had never heard of this ever happening among his people. However, his research into the humans, had uncovered many such cases as this. Where the mates had been together so long or loved so strongly that they had “willed” themselves to die within a short time of the loss of their mate. He didn’t know if that was what was happening or not, but after watching their actions over the last few days, he had no doubt that they were capable of it.
“That’s absurd! Granted the things they are doing are strange and unusual. But do you, a man of science, honestly believe that is possible?” Gracus wanted to laugh at Amun’s suggestion. He really did. Nevertheless, a part of him was truly afraid that he may be right. He looked at Randor to help him ease his own mind over this, expecting the man to scoff at such an insane thought.
“I don’t know if it’s possible or not. I’ve heard of it happening among the humans, rarely, but it did happen. And with Cari’s abilities, I think it would be a mistake to assume that it isn’t possible. If you had asked me days ago if I thought they would be acting the way they are at the moment, I would have told you no. Now, I have no idea what is possible and what isn’t. I know that I don’t want to take that chance.” All Randor wanted right now was to find a way to get through to Cari and Scaden.
“Oh come on! You two can’t be serious!” The thought of what they were suggesting, combined with what he had been seeing himself, scared Gracus to his very core.
“Do we really want to take the chance? More specifically are you willing to bet their lives on the chance that we’re wrong?” Amun asked him.
*****
Scaden could feel Cari’s pain and sorrow so deeply he didn’t know where her pain ended, and his began. He didn’t know if he missed her so badly that his mind was playing tricks on him or if somehow they had bonded that deeply. He tried to send comforting thoughts the first day or so, hoping to ease her worry and sadness. And it seemed to work for a while.
However, as the days wore on, the longer he was kept from her, the more his own sense of defeat was destroying his ability to try to keep his spirits up. It was as if her sadness w
as being heightened so dramatically that neither one of them could combat it any longer.
He wished he could talk to her and find out why she was feeling so strongly when she didn’t even know what the outcome of this was going to be.
The only explanation he could think of was that she had picked up on someone else’s emotions and had figured it out. This was more than possible since even he was able to pick up on Amun and Gracus’ pain and despair when they had come in earlier.
Not knowing how to help her, he put his hand on the wall of his closet which separated their rooms. And even though he felt stupid doing so, he tried to pour as much love into the gesture as he could.
Immediately, he began to feel an overwhelming sense of love and peace. It was all he needed to know to assure him that she was able to feel how much he cared. It took all of his strength to stop himself from breaking down over the loss of her. That he’d never be able to hold her again, or see her beautiful smile.
He forced himself to concentrate on his love for her as he tried to will himself to sleep. Sleep and dreams were the only place where he could hold her and love her again. Where the world outside no longer existed, and they met in a world of their own creation where no one could separate them. He would take her to his world again this time. Show her, his home and the beauty of Valendra.
*****
Cari placed her hand on the wall and could feel Scaden’s love pour from him in waves, and she sent her love back to him more powerfully than she had known she could.
In the last few days, her emotions had become so out of control that she had begun to worry that she was causing the hopelessness she had been feeling from him. However, she knew, deep down, that it wasn’t true. Everyone was hiding something from her. Something that was causing Scaden to feel that way, and no one was willing to tell her what it was.
She had figured out days ago that Scaden had started to absorb some of her powers. She knew from her parents and Randor that this was common among the human/Valendran’s that had mated. Even without this confirmation she knew with all of her heart and soul that he was her mate. Even so, this seemed different than what she remembered of her parents and the conversations she, and Randor had about this. It was much more powerful than she expected.
In fact, she had expected to lose a slight amount of her abilities since they were essentially being given to her mate. But she was stronger than ever before, if something was magnifying not only her ability, but his new ability as well.
And the dreams… they had become more vivid than they had ever been before. In them, she and Scaden were together and nothing but awakening could tear them apart. The first few times, she took him to all of her favorite places on Earth. The Coliseum and ancient sites in Italy, the streets of Paris, where she made him try all the different foods. She took him to Greece, to see the beautiful waters of the Mediterranean, New Orleans to marvel at the diversity of the people and food.
Scaden loved the food on Earth, and she wanted to see his smile and joy at each of the new tastes she introduced him to. Lately, he began taking her to another world. She knew it was Valendra by the pride in his voice as he told her of the architecture and history. How she wished the dreams were true. And that they were safe together.
Even though she knew the dreams were nothing more than a figment of her imagination and desire to be with him, she found herself spending more and more time wanting only to sleep. And she knew Scaden was sleeping more as well. Maybe it was the loneliness, the despair that was causing them to want to avoid awake. She didn’t know and didn’t really want to try to figure it out when it was so much easier to drift off into sleep and be with him.
A powerful feeling of lethargy overcame her; she knew Scaden must have fallen asleep. Her hand slowly slid down the wall as she gave herself up to her dreams and Scaden.
Chapter Twelve
“It’s been almost two weeks! What the hell do you expect us to do? Sit around and watch them die while you do nothing? Because that seems to be exactly what is happening, and we’re sick of doing nothing!”
Gracus, Amun and Randor sat at a table in one of the ship’s conference rooms as yet another member of the crew told them of their idea to break into both Scaden and Cari’s quarters to try to get them out.
Gracus could understand his frustration and anger. They all felt that way as they watched helplessly as their commander, and his mate slowly began to drift farther from them every day. There was no longer a doubt in anyone’s mind that they were mates.
The problem seemed to be convincing anyone on the council that they were, as they continued to refuse to open Scaden’s quarters until they arrived. None of the crews were even sure if the two of them would make it that long. The council was so certain that sooner or later both would get hungry enough to eat, and since the basic life scans on both showed only a slight drop in heart rate that they were in no danger of dying any time soon. Everyone on this ship knew better.
“Callumus, we all understand how you are feeling. We have tried every day to talk the council into breaking the security seal on Scaden’s door, and they won’t do it. They aren’t listening to us. We’ve sent them all the vids of Commander Scaden and Cari, and although they will admit they’ve never seen anything like it; they still refuse.”
“We are doing everything we can to come up with a way to gain access to both quarters. But your idea of blasting a hole into the door would not only endanger the commander’s life, but the lives of everyone on this ship. There are too many things that can go wrong, and you know that.” Gracus tried his best to calm the man. And he couldn’t blame him for wanting to try such a drastic approach to solving the problem either since he, and Randor had already thought of the exact same thing. Unfortunately, the risks were far too great for them to try.
“Callumus, if anything happens to one of them, we are afraid it will happen to both. We can’t take a chance that any harm that befalls the commander, will cause Cari to decline even further. You understand that don’t you?” Amun added. They all knew there was no longer any point in trying to lie to the crew regarding what was going on. Every one of them could see exactly what was happening. And even though the council had determined it was best to block the vids of Cari and Scaden’s quarters from the crew, Gracus, Amun and Randor had decided to put it to a vote.
There was not one single crew member that didn’t vote to allow the vids to continue to be broadcast around the ship. And the three of them had decided to accept whatever consequences the council wanted to give them for disobeying.
The decision to allow the vote completely changed the atmosphere around the ship. Where before, everyone was ready to kill them for what they saw as their betrayal of their commander and his mate, they seemed to have decided to postpone that in an effort to try to find a way to help them… at least for now anyway. They were not under any illusions that the crew would ever forget or forgive them for what they had done.
“Sir, I think Balduen and I might have an idea. We’ve been on the planet and not subjected to the highly emotional situation you are facing on the ship. I think we may be able to look at this more objectively than any of you. From what we know of the situation, you need to get into both of their quarters and get them to MedLab, correct?” Niklosi interjected from the comm.
He had been reporting to Gracus and Amun the latest status updates on the search for Jess, when Callumus had entered the conference room and had heard the conversation. He and Balduen had been carefully following what was going on with their commander and Cari while they had been on the planet, and were very concerned about them.
“You think you have a way to override the council’s lock on Scaden’s door?” Randor asked him skeptically. They had tried everything, had thought of everything. If the three of them hadn’t thought of it, the crew had. Nothing had worked or would after careful consideration. He wasn’t going to hold out hope on yet another failed attempt.
“Well, not exactly. We know of a way
to get in without overriding anything and without blasting a hole in the wall either.” Balduen added.
Niklosi and Balduen began explaining to them how to get into the commander and Cari’s quarters, the others listened intently wishing they had figured out the same simple solution weeks ago.
*****
“Where are we?” Cari asked Scaden in breathless wonder. She had never seen anything so beautiful.
Scaden hugged her closely to him, thinking the only thing more beautiful than where they were, was the woman in his arms. “We are in my special place, not far from my home. It’s a private area that has been in my family for as long as my family has been here. I would come as a boy and play, and as an adult to think and relax after my studies.”
Cari couldn’t believe such a place even existed. They were standing on a beach that surrounded the bluest, clearest water she had ever seen. It was a huge lake of some kind that was surrounded by equally large mountains and heavily wooded areas. It looked like she had stepped into an area of a National Park on Earth, but the colors were much more vibrant.
The twin suns shone brightly on the lake, the air much cleaner and crisper than anything she’d experienced on Earth. And the strange animals she’d seen the last time Scaden had brought her to his world, scampered around them as if they knew they need not to fear them. It made the whole scene much more surreal, and drove home to her that this was nothing more than her imagination taking hold of her in her dreams.
“Don’t Cari. I can feel you pulling away already. We agreed that if this was a shared dream, or just our own personal dreams that we wouldn’t ruin our time together with worry or sadness.” Scaden chided her, hugging her tighter to him.
“I know. I’m sorry. I just wish it could really be this way. I wish this was real.” Cari replied sadly.