“Do not talk about me in such a manner!” demanded Kate. “I am not a commodity to be exchanged in the public market. Wynbrook, your scruples do you credit, but you have provided me with great assistance and I shall never demand a proposal from you because of it. There will be no wedding.”
“As much as I dislike to disagree with a lady, I fear I must disappoint you,” drawled Wynbrook. He had overcome his initial shock and now appeared as he always did—confident with an aura of unruffled calm and a slight element of humor, as if mildly amused by the tragedy unfolding before him.
“I have been seen running off with the sister of a peer of the realm,” continued Wynbrook. “It is an offense only a wedding can rectify, and even that may not be enough for high sticklers to propriety.”
“No!” Kate was adamant. She would not be cornered into marriage, nor would she allow Wynbrook to be trapped. It was not fair to either of them, no matter what her personal desires may be. “You are a lord and a gentleman, and I shall not allow you to be forced into marriage because of a few idle words in a gossip column. No one who was in possession of all the facts could possibly feel that your willingness to assist us in our time of need should be rewarded by matrimonial entrapment.”
Kate met Emma’s eye hoping to find support. Instead, Emma gave her a sympathetic half smile. “I fear that society can be quite unforgiving,” said Emma. “Having read the gossip columns for many years, I can tell you that these things are unlikely to be quickly forgotten. In a case such as this, I feel Lord Wynbrook has indeed done the honorable thing.”
Wynbrook and Miss St. James exchanged smiles, only furthering Kate’s ill humor.
“I do apologize,” said Kate, having difficulties in meeting Wynbrook’s eye. “But I am forced to be disagreeable in this matter. I simply will not allow you to propose marriage simply to protect my reputation.”
“It is not only your reputation that will suffer.” Wynbrook turned so that she could no longer avoid him, and she was drawn into the strange warmth of his green eyes. “According to the papers, I have abducted the sister of a peer the realm. If I do not return married to said young lady, I will find my society lacking. No decent person will speak to me. My own sisters will be forced to cut the acquaintance.”
She was outvoted. Wynbrook, Miss St. James, even her own brother felt that she should marry the Earl of Wynbrook, one of the biggest matrimonial prizes in all of Britain. Kate swallowed convulsively. Her world had just slid sideways. This could not possibly be happening. Everyone was silent in the room.
“I think I should attend to some of my correspondence,” said Emma with a tight smile. She gave Kate one last sympathetic glance before leaving the room.
Both men stood at her exit. Wynbrook sat down once more beside Kate, but Robert lingered on his feet. He gave the unhappy couple a brief nod and then headed for the door. “Good luck,” he said in a voice so soft Kate was not sure if it was intended for herself or for Wynbrook.
The door closed behind him with an ominous click. Silence once more fell upon the room, suffocating her with its vast emptiness. She sat beside Wynbrook, yet they might have been sitting at opposite ends of the empty room for how much distance she felt between them.
“So I gather you are not pleased with the prospect of becoming my wife.” Wynbrook stretched his long legs out before him and reclined against the back of the settee in a most relaxed manner. He was positively lounging.
“How is it that you are so much at your ease?” demanded Kate, spearing him with what she hoped was a piercing look. He did not seem at all distressed.
“If we are to wed, it would not be inappropriate to make ourselves comfortable around each other.”
“If I were to be comfortable, I would have to remove this damned new set of stays,” grumbled Kate.
Wynbrook’s eyebrows shot up. “I invite you to do so. Most passionately.”
Kate scowled at him and changed the subject away from the topic of her undergarments. “You are showing a decided lack of surprise at this turn of events.”
“I confess, I had decided a proposal from me would need to be forthcoming. My only disappointment is the papers anticipated my pronouncement. I was trying to decide how best to broach the subject and now I no longer have to strain myself to devise the perfect plan.”
“Why should you need to propose? There is no need, I assure you.”
“I kissed you.”
Kate felt as if he had sucked all the air from her lungs. She opened and closed her mouth, not able to speak. Not able to breathe. He mentioned the kiss. She had hoped he would never speak of it.
“Several times, actually,” Wynbrook continued. “Once might be forgivable, but repeatedly? And of course I will not even mention our sleeping arrangements of two nights ago. No, a proposal is required.”
“There were extenuating circumstances,” Kate insisted, still trying to remember how to breathe. “It was simply a case of being thrust together.” Her mouth went dry at the recognition of the words that had just fallen out of her mouth. “It could have happened to anyone,” she added quickly.
Wynbrook stubbornly shook his head. “If the situation had been reversed and Dare had come to me for help to find you, I would not have—”
“Yes, yes, you need not be ridiculous.”
“The truth is I kissed you.” He looked back and forth as if checking to make sure the room was indeed empty and moved closer to her in a conspiratorial manner. “And I have the lingering impression that you kissed me in return.” He leaned closer so that he was whispering in her ear, his breath warm on her skin. “And what is worse, I enjoyed it, and I believe you enjoyed it too. In truth, I would like to kiss you right now.”
Kate turned to tell him to stop whispering tempting words in her ear, but she turned toward him, not away, and now her lips were dangerously close to his. She froze, unsure what she wanted to do, but Wynbrook was not so undecided and quickly closed the gap, pressing his lips to hers.
Kate’s arms wound around Wynbrook of their own accord and he returned the embrace, pulling her close to him and deepening the kiss.
When their lips finally parted, Kate took a ragged breath. What was she doing? How could she let him kiss her again? “I…I confess a small attraction between us.”
“Nothing between us is small,” interrupted Wynbrook.
“But it does not change anything.” She stood up and took a step back. “It cannot change anything.”
Wynbrook rose to his feet, the smug, satisfied look fading from his face. “Whatever do you mean? That kiss changes everything.”
“No, no, it cannot. There are things about me you do not know. Things that make it impossible for me to wed.” Kate took another step back and cast a furtive glance at the door. “I am sorry, truly I am, but I cannot marry you. It is simply impossible.” She turned and ran from the room.
Twenty-nine
Kate sat in the window seat of her room and stared out onto the ocean, the sunlight casting sparkles along the churning waves. The rhythmic roar of the ocean was comforting and familiar in a world turned upside down. Wynbrook wished to marry her.
Marry her.
But of course, that could never be.
A soft knock at the door interrupted her thoughts. She paused a moment, not sure she was up to another round with Wynbrook, or her brother, for that matter. “Who is it?”
“It’s me, Emma.”
“What do you want?”
A perpetually cheerful face popped in the doorway. “Talk? I brought tea and pastries.”
“I am really not in the mood for conversation.”
“Just tea then,” said Emma, carrying in a tea service.
Kate wanted to tell her to go away, but the smell of the cook’s scones and the rumble of her stomach overruled her pride. Perhaps a good cup of tea was exactly what she needed. Emma place
d the tea service on a small table and carried the table over to the window seat, so Kate would not need to move.
Emma poured the tea and offered the scone, sitting next to her on the window seat and sipping on her own cup.
“This is a lovely view,” she commented.
“Yes,” agreed Kate. She had forgotten how much she enjoyed watching the waves from her high perch in Greystone Hall.
“I know we only just met, but it seemed to me that perhaps you would like someone to talk to or just someone to be a friend. I hope you know I would like to be that friend.” Emma gave her an encouraging smile.
Despite being annoyingly perfect, it was hard to dislike Emma St. James. It would have been like kicking a puppy. It just felt wrong.
“Thank you,” said Kate, taking another sip of tea. “You have been very kind to our family.”
“Forgive me, for I know it is none of my concern, but I see the way Lord Wynbrook looks at you and you at him. Why are you opposed to marriage?”
“I do not wish to marry someone out of obligation.”
“I am sorry I read those gossip columns. They always seemed to be about faraway people in society. People who were not real. Now I see the true damage gossip can cause, and I am ashamed of myself for being a party to it.”
“’Tis hardly your fault.”
“Nor is it yours for what was written,” returned Emma. “I would hate to see anyone throw away a chance at happiness because of a few idle words.”
Kate shook her head. “You do not understand. I can never marry anyone. I have seen things…done things. Marriage is not possible for me.”
Emma gave her a sympathetic look and passed the jam. “I believe our hardships produce in us the fortitude to triumph over our challenges. For as it is written in Romans 5:3–5, We glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; And patience, experience; and experience, hope: And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.”
“Sorry, but I do not care to glory in my tribulations. And I think patience is an entirely overrated character trait.”
“But what of hope?” asked Emma with an infectious smile. “It seems you could use some. What of the love of God being poured into your heart? I believe our hardships are actually blessings in disguise.”
Kate snorted. Blessings in disguise? What kind of tea was this girl drinking? She was about to retort that it was easy to glorify sufferings if you never had any, but she stopped a moment before the words left her lips. Perhaps Emma was more familiar with tribulations than one would initially guess. “Why are you sailing to America to get married? Have you hardships that led to the choice?”
Emma’s countenance turned almost guilty, as if caught at something she wished to remain hidden. “I was very close to my father. My mother died when I was young, and it was just him and me. When I got older, he thought I needed a mother figure in my life, to help me and bring me out in society. I believe when he married my stepmother, he was thinking mostly of me. Unfortunately, he died, leaving me with her and her son.”
Emma’s smile faded and an uncharacteristic frown settled on her somber face. “They wished for me to sign over my inheritance to him, saying he could manage the estate better than I. When I refused, they demanded I marry him.”
“That is horrible!” exclaimed Kate.
“I confess, I was not pleased. Then they hit upon the idea that I could wed a man in America.”
“But do you not see they are just trying to get their hands on your inheritance?”
“Yes, of course. But I do not mind going to America. I think it will be a grand adventure. Why, I’ve had such a diverting time so far.”
“I would not call this diverting.”
“I have met such nice people.”
“But, Emma, they are essentially robbing you of your inheritance. You cannot let them do that.” Kate spoke passionately from experience.
“My happiness is more important than my inheritance, is it not? Besides, maybe someday I will return. Or maybe someday I will not. Either way, I am free of a situation that was deeply unpleasant, and I have the opportunity to travel and see wonderful new places.” Emma’s eyes sparkled. “Truly, I would not miss this adventure for a thousand country homes.”
Kate sipped her tea. Maybe whatever Emma was drinking would inflict her with a similar joy without regard to circumstance. Give Emma her due—at least she was happy.
“So will you at least try?” asked Emma.
“Try what? I am not going to America in search of a husband.”
“No, but maybe you could walk to the drawing room?”
“If Wynbrook knew me, knew the whole story, he would not have proposed.”
“Why do you not test your theory and see if it’s true? Tell him the truth.”
“What if he rejects me?”
“What if he doesn’t?” Emma gave Kate a sweet smile, picked up the tea tray, and skipped out of the room, which honestly was rather hard to do while holding a tea tray.
Kate stared after her. Who was that girl?
She did not have long to wait before there was another knock on her door. It was her brother.
“You should not be out of bed,” she chastised, jumping up to help him into a chair.
“Cannot lie about,” he grumbled.
“You certainly can. How else do you think you will recover?”
He shrugged. “Talked to the magistrate. Told him the version you told the staff. They are out looking for the men who did it. Wish I could go myself.”
“Don’t even think it. You can hardly stand.”
“Do what I have to. Hopefully, I don’t have to.” Robert sat back in his chair and closed his eyes. He was paler than usual, and Kate did not care to see it. He was always so invincible, seeing him vulnerable was not welcome.
“You should see Emma. She has scones. And jam,” Kate added.
A rarely seen smile lit Robert’s face though his eyes remained closed. “I know. She brought me some.”
“She is a good person.”
Robert opened his eyes. “The best.”
“She thinks I should talk to Wynbrook.”
“So do I.”
“Is that why you are here?”
Robert nodded. “Know you don’t want to be married. Know the reasons why too. Think you should give Wynbrook a chance.”
“And if he should reject me?”
“He won’t. Better not, anyways. Even if he does, you won’t be in any different place than you are now.”
“Yes, I would. If I reveal my secrets to a man who rejects me, then I have been scorned and thrown aside, discarded like so much rubbish.”
Robert paused a moment and gave her an appraising look. “You like him, don’t you?”
“Yes.” Her voice was small. She sat back down at the window and pulled her knees up to rest her chin on them. The ocean swirled below her in a constant yet unpredictable motion.
“Talking involves risk. Fortunately, my sister is no coward.” Robert struggled up out of the chair and walked stiffly out the door, shutting it behind him.
He was wrong. She was scared beyond reason.
Thirty
Wynbrook finished a letter to Tristan and another to Anne. He was certain they would not be pleased with him. To have such vulgar gossip about the family in the Times was anathema to Anne. He hoped Tristan would soon arrive with the license. Considering he still held the man’s suitcase, he had no doubt Tristan would travel with all due haste.
While he was fearful his family was irritated at him, he was certain Kate was more so. He wondered what could be so horrible that he would not wish to marry her. Was she a Napoleonic spy? Did she have a love child hidden in Gibraltar? Twin love children?
A quiet
rustle at the door caught his attention and the object of his musing stepped tentatively into the room. Kate paused, hesitant and unsure, quite at odds with her usual direct manner. She glanced at the door as if ready to make a run for it at any moment. He stood up slowly, afraid any sudden movement would make her take flight.
“Hello,” he said.
“Good day,” she returned.
Silence.
“Have you had tea?” he asked, trying to stick to benign topics.
“Yes. Emma brought it. Though I suppose as hostess I should have poured it.” She shook her head as if mentally chiding herself. “You see what a wretched countess I would make.”
“Come, please sit. It has been a difficult day.” He smiled and hoped she would sit next to him on the settee. She chose a chair as far from him as possible.
“Emma and Robert think I should be married. To you,” she added, just in case he could possibly be confused on this point.
“Excellent. I’m glad to know I have allies.”
“They think I should let you know why I cannot be wed, so you can decide.”
“About that. I have decided to accept your twelve children born out of wedlock and adopt them as my own.”
“What?” She was aghast.
“Your love children. I am trying to imagine what would be so horrible I would not wish to wed you. Illegitimate offspring was the best I could come up with. There aren’t actually twelve, are there?” He was a little anxious.
“There aren’t any!”
Wynbrook let out a breath, more relieved than he wished her to know. “Well now, that’s a relief, because making up a story to cover all twelve would take more imagination than I’ve got.” Wynbrook hoped to make her smile but Kate was not having it.
“What would make you think that I would…that I would have…that I would do that?”
“Nothing. Only you have skulked in here like you have a horrible secret and I have been racking my poor brain to figure out what it might be.”
“I will have you know my virtue, such as it is, is quite intact,” she said primly. “Though yours is not the first bare arse I’ve ever seen.”
If the Earl Only Knew (The Daring Marriages) Page 23