by Kailin Gow
“Are you calling me a slut?”
Judy didn’t bat an eye. “You certainly learned how to dress like one.”
My fists were balled so tight, I could feel my nails digging into my palms. How dare she? How could she? “You have no idea what I’ve been through.”
“You're right. I don’t. As a lowly second-rate dancer I don’t really have many opportunities to deal with paparazzi, hungry men and fawning fans.”
“Perhaps not, but stage hands and hangers-on sure seem to interest you,” I snapped back. “You with a new date every night. Aren’t you a little too tarnished to be throwing stones at me?”
“Sweetie, I’m on the up and up with any man I date. I never lead him on, tear his heart out with my innocent smile only to trample it with my stilettos before I kick it aside for a new man.”
What an awful thing to say. I could feel the rage growing in my chest and I wanted to scream. I bolted out of my chair and faced her. “You're making it sound as thought I’d deliberately set out to hurt Chace. I’m new to this, remember? I’m new to the city, new to men, new to dating. Chace was my first real kiss, for crying out loud. And you expect me to know the ins and out of relationships and how I should feel and how I should act?”
“Even an innocent knows better than to pit one man against another, especially when that other man is a powerhouse like Aragon. Chace didn’t stand a chance, but you let him believe he did. That’s worst than a slut, Annette.”
I burst out crying again. To hear a friend make such accusations was devastating. All the guilt and the pain flowed from me and I crumpled onto my sofa, bringing a cushion to my chest. “It wasn’t me, Judy,” I finally managed to blurt out. “It wasn’t me.”
“I know. New York has a way of bringing out the wanton in the most virginal girl, but come on, take an ounce of responsibility, Annette. You knew Chace was falling for you, didn’t you? For crying out loud, he introduced you to his parents. What does that tell you?”
“No. That’s not what I mean. It really wasn’t me, Judy.” I reached up to grab her hand and pull her onto the sofa beside me. “I had no control. I was possessed.”
“What do you mean? You were taking drugs or what?”
I knew it would sound crazy and I knew she wouldn’t believe me. As the words spun around on my tongue, I knew they didn’t make sense. I took a firm hold of her hands to keep her at my side. “I was possessed, Judy.”
“Is that your defense? Possessed? Honestly, Annette. You're not in the bayou anymore. There’s no voodoo out here. Can’t you come up with something better than that? I mean, I think the drug thing would be a little more believable, though it would hurt your career.”
“Judy, listen to me. The Phantom. All the hauntings here at the Met. The noises and the strange happenings. Remember when I first left for New Orleans? Remember how the Met seemed to go mad in my absence? Remember the singers who were almost killed for trying to replace me?”
Her eyes lost a touch of cynicism and I knew I was getting through to her. “Oh, my God.”
“That phantom wanted me, Judy.”
She blanched and her lips parted while her eyes took on the same horror she’d felt that night. “He’d scribbled ‘only Annette’ on the mirror… in blood red. He’d had everyone here running in terror.”
“Yes, that’s it. That’s the phantom who took over me. But it wasn’t a he. It was a she. A she who was wanton and seemed intent on ruining everything. Do you remember my performances after that? You all looked at me as though I’d lost my mind, my voice, and my ability to conduct myself in a proper manner.”
“You saw all this?”
“I was still in there and I saw everything that phantom did. And I fought hard to beat her. With every move she made I knew that she was causing irreparable harm to my career and reputation.”
Judy’s hands softened in mine and it was now her holding me and trying to console me. “We didn’t know what to make of you. The change was so radical; so overnight. You were bright and sweet one day, then arrogant and obnoxious the next. Many assumed it was simply the fame that’d made a quick way to your head. Those of us who knew you a bit more were really baffled.”
“Chace, too, right?”
Her head seemed heavy as she nodded and I saw the complete understanding in her eyes. “More than anyone.”
I inhaled deeply, relieved to have the secret out there. Just talking it out with someone felt wonderful and to know that she believed me made it all the more soothing. But how was I going to get Chace to believe such a story? “I need to tell Chace. I need to make him understand.”
“He’s aware of the hauntings here. And now that I think of it, the Met went quiet and back to normal just when you started acting weird. Surely he’ll realize that.” Horror remained in her eyes as she looked at me. “How awful it must be to be in your own body and not have control.”
“You can’t imagine.”
She patted my hand with tender affection. “Chace doesn’t really want to go. We all know it. But the sight of you with Aragon is too painful. He’d jump at the chance not to leave New York if you explain what really happened. Better yet, let me tell him what happened. He remembers how horrified I was when that chandelier collapsed on stage. He’ll believe me.”
“Yeah, either that or he’ll think I’m really crazy.”
We both laughed but it was a dry, almost sad laugh.
“I’d better get going. I’ve got a hot lunch date.”
Our eyes met, hers with the anticipation of a biting remark, mine with teasing playfulness. “Have a good time,” I said, patting her on the behind as she stood to walk out.
“Oh, I will.” She winked and was gone.
I went to sit before the mirror, eyeing my reflection with a new eye. How these past months have changed me. I’d arrived the sweet girl from New Orleans and had met Chace, as kind and generous as a boy could be, and we’d instantly connected. How could we not? We were virtually raised with the same values.
The musical note on my bracelet glistened in the light and I was again touched by Chace’s thoughtfulness. We’d been on such a great path together.
Then Eric, Aaron and Kristine had swept in to turn everything upside down. What was it about them that had me straying from the one man who could truly make me happy? For all of Aaron’s worldliness, power, and money; I didn’t truly feel that strong connection to him. And Eric…
He was so dark, so dangerous and he drew me in like no other power I’d ever known. Why was I so weak in front of him? How could he step into my life and cause such turmoil? Just thinking about him I could now smell the musky scent that always accompanied him.
I wanted to avoid seeing him. I needed to avoid him, for my own sanity; for the protection of my heart. And for Chace.
The darkness and danger that drew me to Eric was a girl’s childish fantasy and I had no room in my life for that. My God, he wasn’t even from this century. How foolish of me to think that anything could ever come of my relationship with him.
And Kristine…I stared at my eyes in the mirror, looking for the slightest sign of her. Was she still here? Was she still with me? My eyes widened as I continued to stare, and the space around me grew dark and distant. Was she there?
A firm knock at the door had me so startled I fell off my chair and landed with a sound thump on the floor. Wasn’t bad enough I’d been possessed, I was now spooking myself to lunacy.
I rushed to the door, hoping whoever was there hadn’t heard my stumble.
“Eric.” All my resolve of just seconds before faded away and my knees buckled at the mere sight of him.
He held a red rose which he passed playfully under my nose. The sweet scent was powerful, but not enough to override the manly scent emanating from him.
“It’s a winter rose,” he said. A cockeyed grin played on his lips and I could swear he knew the effect he was having on me. He stepped closer until he was in my dressing room and closing the door. “The
first from my garden.” He brushed the velvety petals across my cheek, like a soft summer kiss.
My eyes closed despite my will to remain strong and in control. The spell he had over me was strong and I felt my body tilt into his.
Chace, I thought. Chace has been hurt enough. But while I tried to conjure up the bright and boyish face, only Eric’s dark and gloomy one played before my eyes. Strong and determined, his pull on me was relentless.
Tears stung my eyes when his arms wrapped around me and pulled me closer. It felt so right… too right. His touch, his scent and his very breath on my hair all combined to leave me unable to resist.
“Annette.”
My name was a song on his lips. Hushed and hungry, he said it again and again. I pulled back to glance at him and had never seen him so happy.
I wanted to tell him how much I loved him and how I longed for him. But in the same breath, I needed to tell him this couldn’t be; we couldn’t be.
“You’ve no idea how relieved I am to see that Kristine is finally and completely gone.” He gripped my shoulders and looked me in the eye. “Not a trace of her. It’s really all you.”
“Yes.” I smiled and longed to return to his arms.
“Now we’re finally free to begin a life together.” He leaned into me and covered my lips with his. His kiss was deep and my body didn’t take long to respond. I pulled him closer and my tongue eagerly swept into the warmth of his mouth to taste him.
For all the strength he gave me, he left me so utterly weak to his touch.
“Kristine is behind us now,” he whispered. “Let’s concentrate on you and me.”
“I hate you, Eric.”
We tensed and held our breaths. The voice had cackled from nearby and I was relieved to see he’d heard it, too.
“It’s your passion that made me what I am today.”
I wanted to scream at the voice that was so ugly and distorted.
“Your passion drove me mad all those years ago. Now it’s Annette’s turn to lose her mind over you.”
My eyes locked with Eric’s and my heart thundered so loud, it almost drowned Kristine out.
“You never change, Eric. And you never will.”
“Don’t listen. She’s a bitter…” Eric began to say.
A loud cackle filled the room and split our ears.
A cool breeze tickled my ear. “He’s not what he seems, this dashing and handsome man before you.” The voice was directly in my ear, so close I could feel each icy syllable. “He’ll die before you find out about his birth.”
Goosebumps crawled over my skin and I could feel the hairs at the back of my neck bristle with fear and apprehension. An icy spike pierced through me and filled the room. A shiver shook me so violently, I stumbled back and reached for my chair.
Eric quickly took a hold of me and kept me steadily on my feet. “Are you all right?”
I looked into his handsome face and felt my breaths come in deep, painful rasps. He was so handsome, so unbearably handsome, yet… What was he? Who was this man who traveled by darkened tunnels and clung to immortal life for centuries?
He seemed bewildered by my scrutiny and I forced myself to relax. But as I pulled my gaze away from him, a flicker of flame played in his eyes. I blinked and wanted to run, but the fire was already gone when I once again brought my eyes to his.
“My God, Eric. What are you? Who are you?”
I didn’t realized I was backing away until I ran into my table. My hands involuntarily ran over the surface, searching. I’d no idea what for, but it seemed vitally important I find something; something to hold onto.
Eric tilted his head to the side and gazed sidelong at me.
It was a gaze that was far from calming. Something eerie clung to his eyes and the more he approached me, the more I cowered. His eyes hardened as they followed the movement of my hand.
My throat tingled and I remembered the sensation of his fingers around my neck. The pain returned, reminding me of what he was capable of. The rage and violence, all hidden behind that handsome veneer.
With a prayer on my lips, I reached for the cross around my neck then reached up to finger the soft skin he’d brutally bruised.
“You could have killed me.” The words came on their own. An accusation that had clung to me since the moment his fingers had taken on such a murderous grip.
He stepped closer as his eyes filled with remorse. “Annette, you know very well there’s no need to fear me. It is Kristine who is the Phantom. Kristine who deliberately pushed me to violence.” His powerful fingers brushed away mine and tenderly touched the sore bruise. “But she’s gone now. Please forgive me for laying a hand to you. I would never hurt you.”
“You did hurt me, Eric.” I pushed his hand away from me.
“It was Kristine.” His tone remained apologetic, but his eyes hardened ever so slightly.
“It was still me,” I argued.
“You don’t understand the power she has.” He turned away and pushed his fingers through his hair, exposing his grimacing profile to me. The black strands fell back around his face in a fashion that was angry and wicked. The darkness and danger that had always drawn me to him were now alarming.
“She knows how to throw you into a rage and you oblige,” I said.
He spun on his heels and faced me; pain and anger played on his features. A century of torment filled his eyes. “You’ve no idea what she’s put me through.”
“No.” I should have been more sympathetic, more compassionate, but I hadn’t the desire to be understanding at that moment. My throat still ached and I was tired of trying to understand this endless feud that had nothing to do with me. “But I know what you’ve both put me though.”
Chapter 12
Eric
Kristine has left me feeling like a monster once again. She’s traveled to another time, another continent just to work her demonic evil into my life. Seeing the fear in Annette’s eyes and knowing that my hand could be the cause of such fear… how I wish it was Kristine I’d truly killed so Annette and I could have some peace.
After I stormed out of Annette’s dressing room, I escaped to my darkened tunnels, just as I had as a child; just as I’d run away from the world who feared the hideous monster with the disfigured face.
I’d no doubt Kristine planned to turn Annette against me. She wouldn’t stop just because she no longer had direct control over Annette’s body. She nonetheless had control over our lives.
My home echoed with the heavy steps of my boots as I entered and paced the length of one room, then another and then another. All around me were remnants of Annette’s stay here. Her fragrance. Her gloves. The plate of fruit she’d left untouched at breakfast.
The depth of love I felt for her weighed on me and the thought of her in Kristine’s hands made it all the more unbearable.
I stopped before the mirror in the corridor and examined my face. Though I knew the scars had faded, all I could see looking back at me was a face covered with unsightly scars. The physical markings may have left, but the depth of each scar remained. As handsome as I could appear to the world now, inside I was still the monster Kristine had always wanted me to become; to remain for all eternity.
Staring into my bloodshot eyes, I shouted out my anguish and heard my voice come back to me on a deafening echo of my empty home. Unable to endure anymore, I watched the looking glass shatter and fall to the floor and was surprised to then see my fist bloodied from the blow to the reminder of what I truly was.
*****
Annette
I stared at the door for a solid two minutes, unable to move, unable to think and just barely able to breathe. What had just happened? One moment Eric was here, gentle, romantic and passionate, and the next he was a veritable monster, complete with sneer and a slamming door.
Kristine’s voice still echoed in my head and I knew that she was bringing out in Eric a side of him I’d never wanted to see. A side I’d denied and flatly refused to ac
cept. Maman had warned me not to be so trusting, not to be so naïve and innocent.
Wrapping my arms around myself, I curled up on the sofa and wept for the innocence that was being torn so heartlessly away from me. I longed for the security and warmth of home and Maman’s arms. I wanted to go back to a time and place where there weren’t so many men, so many questions and so much confusion.
Through the haze of tears and sniffles, I heard a light knock at my door. Unable to face anyone, I buried my face in a cushion, muffling my cries. The door creaked open.
“Annette.”
The alarm in Aaron’s voice brought me out of the cushions.
“What’s wrong? What’s going on?”
I sat up, reluctant to face him. For all his kindness and patience, I really didn’t want to talk this out with him.
His fingers were quick to wipe the tears away, but I continued to sniffle and weep. Though I tried to get a grip on my emotions, the fatigue, stress and confusion was now overwhelming and I couldn’t stop crying.
Proud and pragmatic, Aaron could never understand what I was going through. Surely he would just brush my feelings aside.
“Tell me what’s going on, Annette. What has you so frightened? So shaken up? I’ve never seen you like this.”
“I heard the voice again.” I blurted it out, hoping he’d believe me.
“The what?”
“The voice.The haunting.”
“The Phantom?”
He knew. He understood. Relieved, I leaned into him and suddenly felt sure he’d be able to do something to rectify the situation. It was his opera house. Surely there was something he could do to do away with the Phantom.
“Annette, is what I’ve heard true?”
What had he heard, exactly? I looked at him, unsure what to say.
“I overheard a few girls out in the hall speaking of you. That you were possessed. And now you’re talking foolishness about some phantom.”
Foolishness? I pulled away to look at him. “But, you’ve heard of everything that happened here while I was gone. The chandelier. The mirror. The voice.”