by Angel Smits
“No. Well, yeah, sort of. I want you to make him feel better. He’s happier when you’re around. I know you’ve been avoiding him because of, well, because Dex has a big mouth.” He leaned forward. “If he’s happier with you, he won’t be as unhappy with me.”
She sat back, enjoying the idea that Marcus was happier when she was around, but uncomfortable with Ryan thinking she could be involved in his relationship with his father.
“Do you understand exactly what you’re in trouble for?” She knew what Marcus thought. She was curious what Ryan thought he did.
He looked at his feet, reminding her of that first day when he’d refused to talk to her about the fight. He wasn’t telling her everything. “I sorta lied to him.”
“Uh-huh.” She sat for a long minute, wondering how much she should push him. “And what did you lie to him about?” she asked, though she already knew.
“I didn’t tell him Dex and I were going someplace else,” he whispered.
“Why did you do that?”
Ryan tapped his foot. “I’m thirteen. And I know that because of Mom, he’s—”
“He’s what?” she prompted.
“He won’t even let me stay home alone. He hovers. He checks on me. He doesn’t trust me.”
“Oh, Ryan. I don’t think that’s it.” There was more, but Ryan wasn’t sharing. Would he share if she talked to Marcus for him? Would she learn more?
What a mess. And a possible solution. Giving Ryan more freedom would give her a better chance at being with Marcus.
Suddenly, she figured out why it was a bad idea to date a student’s parent. A little late now.
* * *
ADDIE CALLED MARCUS later that night. She’d debated about going to his house, about asking him to meet her at the coffee shop, but those were places her heart reserved for them. This was about Ryan.
She dialed and waited. He was in the middle of finals, so she knew he was busy. He’d had one hell of a week, and she hated adding to it.
“Hello?” His voice slid over her ear, and she shivered. He sounded relaxed compared with the pain and panic she’d heard yesterday. And he sounded tired.
“Hey, how are you?”
“Tired. Exhausted, actually.” She heard him take a deep breath. “Better now that I’m talking to you.”
She couldn’t help but smile. “Me, too. I was wondering. Would you and Ryan like to come to dinner Friday night? You’ve cooked for me. And my family loved the gifts. Thanks for suggesting it.”
“You’re welcome. You don’t have to make us dinner, though.”
“I don’t have to. I want to.” And she did. She wanted to see him. Wanted to spend time with him. Normal time.
“I’m not going to turn down free food, if you’re worried about that,” he said. “What time?”
“Six?”
“Perfect. We can celebrate the end of finals.” The relief was thick in his voice.
“Great.”
“And Addie?” His voice had dropped an octave.
“Yes?”
He was silent for a long minute. “I—” He cleared his throat. “Thanks. We’ll be there at six sharp.”
Why did she get the feeling that wasn’t what he was going to say at first? She frowned, then shook her head. “Six sharp,” she repeated. “Night, Marcus,” she whispered.
“Night.” He ended the call, and she stared at the phone for a long time afterward. She shivered, not sure if she was doing the right thing.
Ryan’s request hung unspoken in the air. Was she overstepping her bounds? Was this too big of a risk to this new relationship? Maybe she shouldn’t say anything.
She set her phone down. She had until Friday to figure it out.
By the end of the week, she had no better idea of what she was going to do. She focused instead on her cooking.
Between visiting her grandfather’s ranch as a child and being the oldest of six, she’d learned the value of skills like canning, gardening and using fresh food to prepare meals. Oh, she wasn’t nearly as good at cooking as her mother, or as Tara, but she could make a good home-cooked meal.
So why was she so nervous? She’d made this recipe dozens of times. Her siblings had always enjoyed it.
This wasn’t her family, though. This was Ryan and Marcus. This was their first impression of her life. This was important.
Putting the lid on the pot, she took a deep breath. Letting the aroma of the minestrone fill her, she relaxed a little. Then, putting the fresh loaf of French bread into the oven, she savored that scent, as well. Her tight muscles eased.
Setting the timer, she stepped back and relaxed. It would be perfect. She’d done her best, and that was all she could ask. That’s what she told the kids, and what she lived by. She just needed to remind herself once in a while.
The doorbell rang, and every nerve she’d just relaxed jumped to attention.
She took one last glance in the mirror before pulling the door open. There they were. The man and the boy who meant so much to her. She swallowed. “Come in.”
“Something smells delicious.” Marcus smiled. He handed her a box. She looked inside. Cheesecake. “Hope this goes well with that.”
“We’ll make it work if it doesn’t.” She led the way into the kitchen. “You’re just in time. Another ten minutes and we can eat.” She set the cheesecake on the counter.
She turned to Ryan, who’d quietly followed them in. “How was your day today?”
He shrugged, something she’d discovered he did frequently. “Had a test in algebra.” He frowned. “Did okay, I guess.” She met Marcus’s gaze.
“What would you like to drink?” she asked Ryan. “You can help yourself to anything in the fridge.”
Decisions made, she put the finishing touches on the table. The timer went off, and she reached for the hot pads to pull out the crusty bread. Just like her mother had done, she rubbed the top with the butter. It glistened in the dim light, the yeasty steam filling the air around them.
“I hope that tastes as good as it looks and smells.”
Marcus was there, just inches away, his body heat nearly as warm as what poured off the fresh loaf of bread.
“I—uh—hope so, too,” she said, breathily, having trouble breathing with him so close. Their eyes met. Time stopped, and she didn’t ever want to look away.
“Ahem.” Ryan’s voice broke through her thoughts. Hopefully, Marcus would think the flush on her cheeks was attributed to the warm oven.
Hastily, she put the bread on a board and handed it to Marcus along with a knife. She turned away and focused on serving up the soup while he took the bread to the table. She racked her brain for something else to discuss, to think about besides Marcus’s proximity.
“Oh, I’d like to invite you both to my brother’s ranch the week after next for a barbecue.” She sat in her seat, trying not to enjoy their company too much. “The whole county is coming. It’s a retirement party for our ranch manager.”
“That’d be fun.” Ryan dug into his soup.
“I guess.” Marcus didn’t look nearly as convinced. She bit her lip. He’d be meeting her whole family.
“Wyatt has lots of horses.” She looked pointedly at Ryan. “Might be a better way for you to see some.”
“Uh, yeah.” Ryan looked away.
This time when she looked at Marcus, he was grinning at his son. “I think we can make it.”
Relief washed over her. One mission accomplished.
* * *
ADDIE WAS NERVOUS. He’d never seen her like this before. What was the matter? Was it just the invitation, and prospect of his meeting her family? Or something else?
If Ryan hadn’t been there, he’d have asked her straight out. Hell, whom was he kidding? If Ryan weren’t here, they wouldn’t be doing much talking at all.
Finally full, Marcus pushed his empty plate away. “That was delicious, Addie.” He enjoyed the way her cheeks tinted pink.
“Thank you.”
“Yeah, it’s really good.” Ryan was finishing his second helping. Marcus still hadn’t figured out where his skinny son put all the food he ate. He remembered being like that at that age, though.
“I’m glad you liked it. I enjoyed cooking something for more than one person.”
She didn’t get up and rush around to start cleaning up dishes, which he was thankful for. He liked to enjoy his food before the chores started. He’d never understood his mother, and later Carolyn, jumping up before everyone was even finished.
“Since we’re all here.” Addie squared her shoulders and looked at Ryan as he finished his last bite. “I thought maybe we should talk.”
Uh-oh. What was going on? He glanced at his son, who looked just as surprised as he felt.
“Now?” Ryan’s voice squeaked.
“Yes, now. And we’re all going to discuss it.” She wiped her mouth daintily with her napkin, then took a sip of her water.
“Uh.” Ryan gulped that last bite, his gaze darting to Marcus.
“What’s going on?” Marcus didn’t like the feeling he was on the outside.
Ryan just stared at him. Marcus looked at Addie. Her lips were pursed, and she frowned. “Okay, I’ll start.” She looked at Ryan.
“I’m not really a part of your family,” she said. “But Ryan asked me to talk to you about something. I think he should discuss it with you himself.”
“But—”
“This is the best way, Ryan.” She told him. “Open honesty. It’s the best way to deal with a problem. You’ve heard me say it at school, right?”
“Yeah,” he begrudgingly admitted. Still, he stalled, taking a drink of his water and taking time to fold his napkin beside his plate.
“Would someone please share with me what’s going on?” Marcus tried to be patient, really he did.
Ryan followed Addie’s example and squared his shoulders, looking at Addie for encouragement. She nodded, and he faced Marcus.
“I wanted her to talk to you about the other day, when...when I, uh, lied about where I was going.” He swallowed. “I’m sorry I lied, and I won’t do it again.”
Marcus waited. He was proud of Ryan for doing this, and he realized this was an important step for him. He’d listen to everything he had to say, not argue with him. His father had never listened, and he knew how hard that was. He’d always sworn to be different.
“But—” Ryan glanced at Addie, then back at Marcus. “But I did it, partly, ’cause you don’t seem to think I can do things on my own.”
This time Marcus looked at Addie. Her expression clearly told him to listen to his son. He tried. He really tried.
“Like what?” Marcus asked. “Give me an example.”
“Well—” Ryan swallowed. “You’re always there. I can stay by myself sometimes. I promise I won’t trash the house or ruin anything. I’ll do just like I do when you’re there.”
It sounded like Ryan didn’t think Marcus trusted him. Marcus stared. Then cleared his throat. “I trust you, Ryan.” He leaned forward, making sure his son could read the sincerity in his voice. “I’m—” He had to clear his throat again. “I guess, I—” Damn this was harder than he’d expected. “Since we lost your mom, I guess, I’m just a little overprotective, huh?” How did he explain that the idea of anything happening to Ryan gave Marcus nightmares?
“A little.”
Marcus laughed. “And by that, I gather you mean a lot.” He reached over and squeezed his son’s shoulder. “I’m sorry. Guess you’re growing up.” He swallowed. “Is it enough if I say I’ll try to do better?”
Ryan nodded and smiled, his relief as strong as what Marcus felt.
“But promise me one thing.”
Ryan frowned. “Uh, sure.”
“I’ll promise to try to be more lenient and open, if you promise to tell me what you want, and not lie to me. Sound fair?”
“Sounds fair.” Ryan nodded and smiled at Addie. “Thanks, Addie.”
“You’re welcome.” Now she got up and started doing the dishes. She didn’t look at him, but he’d seen the smile she’d sent Ryan. Her pride was clear. She cared about Ryan, and he seemed to trust and care about her in return.
“So, to test this.” Ryan stood and carried his plate to the sink. “How about I go home now? On my own. You can come home, uh, later.”
Marcus stared at his son, not sure what was up, and pretty sure this part was a setup. Addie stared at them both, her beautiful wide eyes made the decision for him.
He reached into his pocket and handed Ryan the house keys. “I’ll be home in an hour.” At Ryan’s frown, he said, “Baby steps, son. Give me time, okay?”
Ryan nodded and smiled. “See ya’ later.” Then he was gone.
Marcus looked at Addie.
And they were alone.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
ADDIE WATCHED THE interaction between Marcus and his son, her heart alternately swelling with pride and skipping a beat in anticipation.
Had she done the right thing? Had she handled it right? She had no idea what Marcus was thinking, though Ryan’s thoughts were painted all over his face as he raced out of her house with an hour of freedom.
If anything happened to him, she’d never forgive herself. Marcus would never forgive her. She almost turned to stop Ryan, but forced herself to focus on dishes instead.
Dear God, being a parent was not an easy job. When she’d helped with her siblings, she’d had backup from Wyatt and her mother. How did Marcus do it alone?
She’d have never succeeded if she’d made a different decision all those years ago—
Marcus came up behind her, startling her as he slipped his arms around her waist. She leaned against him. “Have I ever told you how smart you are?” he asked.
“Uh, no.” She tried to keep things light. “But I’d happily take it in writing for later.”
His laughter rumbled in his chest, and she felt it against her back. With his arms around her, he engulfed her, and she relished the sense of security.
Slowly, Marcus let go and reached out to take the dish from her hands. “I have only an hour with you,” he whispered. Gently, he turned her to face him.
A lot could happen in an hour.
“Is this part of your plan to work things out?”
“Uh, no. I mean, yes. To help Ryan. And you. Not so that we can...” Her face flamed. She was so screwing this up.
“Addie, relax.” He took her hands before she grabbed more dishes. “It’s okay. You did fine.”
“No.” She tried to pull away, to put distance between them so she could at least think straight. He held her tight. “I’m not his mother.” Though a big part of her wished... She stopped those thoughts dead in their tracks.
“I know that, Addie. He knows that.” He tilted her chin up with his hand. “Thank you. I appreciate your caring about Ryan.” He leaned in close. “Now stop thinking about him, or I might get jealous.”
“What, um, exactly, should I think about?” She tried to let go of the tension that had been there since they’d arrived for dinner.
“Well, for one, you can relax.” He tenderly kissed her forehead. “Since you didn’t tell me we would have time alone tonight, I’m not any more prepared than I was last time we were alone in this kitchen.”
“Oh.” She looked at him, realizing exactly what he meant. “That isn’t why I did all this.” She should be angry, but she felt more like laughing.
“I know that, but damn, Addie. It’s going to be another sleepless night.” He leaned his forehead on hers.
Seconds ticked by as they looked at each other. Whatever this was between them, it burned hotter with each encounter. She bit her lip, debating with herself, with the desire that stayed banked inside her.
“Maybe,” she whispered. “Maybe, not.” She reached up, unable to stop from touching him. She traced the shape of his lips with her finger and gasped when his tongue slid out and returned the caress.
“I’m not sure—” she slid her hand lower, over the taut muscles of his chest “—how much more I can take,” she whispered.
“You’re going to drive me crazy, aren’t you?”
“No. I’m going to help you sleep.” This time, she pulled his head down so that she could kiss him, needing him more than ever before.
When they finally moved apart again, both of them pulled in hard breaths. Her heart pounded in her chest, driving the heat through her entire system. “There are other ways...”
She couldn’t stop touching him, and the way his big, strong hands held her made her feel safe in wanting him.
“Addie,” he whispered against her lips. “This is too dangerous.”
“Come with me.” She pulled back, taking his hand in hers. “I have an idea.”
Just like the last time, she took his hand and guided him out of the room. “I’m not taking you upstairs, though,” she whispered, her voice husky with desire. “We’d never survive that.” She led him into the darkened living room.
The drapes were already closed, and she moved slowly around, lighting the candles she’d lit when he was here that first time.
“Addie, you’re testing my self-control.”
She put a finger on his lips. “Shh, just let me do this. For both of us.” Addie had never wanted anyone as much as she wanted Marcus right now, right here. They were adults, responsible adults. There were other ways to satisfy each other without the risks. Ways to take the edge off...before she went up in a ball of flame.
“I can’t wait much more.” She reached up and released the first button of his shirt. And then the next. “I don’t know how you can, either.” Opening his shirt, she leaned in and slid her arms around his bare waist, resting her cheek against his chest. So strong. So sexy.