I stand there for a moment before the answer finally comes to me: nothing. There is absolutely nothing I can do about the cause of his behavior.
But there’s plenty I can do about how I allow him to treat me.
“So are you planning on standing there all day?” Ryan hisses.
“You know what? It doesn’t matter if you believe me or not. It doesn’t matter if you like me or not, and it doesn’t matter if you think you should have been made team lead and not me. What does matter is how you treat the people on our team. I expect you to treat me and everyone else on this team with respect. If you don’t think you can handle that, please save us both some time and tell me. Because of your behavior over the last two days, Dr. Brant is aware of the situation. I’m sure she’ll understand if I put a request in for a new botanist.” I paused to let it sink in. “You don’t have to answer me this exact minute. I’ll let you think about it as you work today, but by tonight I either expect a request to transfer from you, or respectful behavior. Understand?” I do my best to keep my expression confident and neutral. I don’t want him to think this is an empty threat and push the issue, just to call my bluff. I will ask for a transfer if I have to.
“Tonight.” His voice is flat, and his eyes are empty as they stare back at me.
I decide to work in the base lab the rest of the day, and give Ryan the space he needs to make his decision. I finally have some footage from my cameras, and it keeps me busy the rest of the day. I finally get to document and classify several different species. Fortunately, none of them seems to be a predator large enough to pose a threat to humans. Ryan doesn’t approach me during the rest of the day, but I hope it’s a good sign.
At the end of the day, I head to the dining hall and run into Brody. “Perfect timing.” A smile spreads across my face as I approach him. “Feel like joining me for dinner?”
“Can’t; I’m meeting the guys,” he answers flatly.
“I’m not sweaty today; I don’t mind dining with them tonight,” I joke.
“Maybe another night; tonight’s just the guys.” He continues walking, leaving me behind where I stood.
“Oh, okay,” I say to no one in particular. I’m confused. Is he still mad at me from when we went swimming? Did he even notice I had been gone? I shake my head in disbelief and head toward the dining hall alone.
Over the next week, I immerse myself in my work. Ryan has decided to stay on our team, and his behavior is better, sort of. Ryan is perfectly polite and cordial towards me, but underneath it all is tension that can’t be missed. When we take a field visit to lay animal traps, he doesn’t complain. He even helps to carry the cages – but there is no small talk, no silly banter, or relaxed moments of interaction between us. Its effect is an ice cold harshness that infects the entire team’s behavior and demeanor. It makes our work feel tedious, and after just a few days of it, we are all showing our exhaustion.
I know I can’t allow this non-fighting to continue, but I’m at a loss for ideas to fix it. Ryan’s not technically doing anything wrong, and if I make an issue of it, I’ll be the bad guy. I tried giving Ryan some distance, but that didn’t help. I tried to include Ryan in work activities. He participates, like with the animal traps, but all of those attempts have been miserable failures. He patiently reports his progress on his grass project but rejects any offers of assistance. Out of desperation, I’ve even tried arranging some fun activities outside of work, like dinner, swimming, or a game of tennis, but he politely declines each time and leaves Molly and Jake stuck in the middle like little kids whose parents are about to divorce.
I’ve decided not to transfer him off the team without a more tangible reason. So the only option I’m left with is simply waiting for his anger to dissipate over time. I just hope out team isn’t too worn out by the time it does.
On Thursday, I can hardly wait to leave work. I’m looking forward to the distraction dinner with Andi and our friends will offer.
When I arrive, Andi is already there. “What’s up?” She looks at me, concerned.
“Nothing, just too much politeness,” I mutter.
“Want to talk about it?” She gestures with her head towards the empty tables.
“Nah, rather forget about it,” I glumly admit. I’ve already talked her ear off several times over the last week about Brody and Ryan. I’m tired of talking, and she must be tired of listening.
“Would it help if I just yell at you and call you a jerk?” Andi asks, lifting an eyebrow and drawing a laugh out of me. She always knows just what to say. I wrap my arm in hers, and we walk over to the large table the rest of our friends are seated at. Well, I walk, at least. Andi skips.
Dinner is full of its usual pleasant banter and interesting stories from everyone’s activities of the day. The only difference is Troy is finally back, and he has brought Hazel with him. She seems pleasant enough. She’s pretty, with straight brown hair cut chin length. It compliments her heart-shaped face and emphasizes her big brown eyes. She seems a little shy, but she has a warm smile. And seriously, who can blame her for feeling shy? Being the only new person at a table of friends would be intimidating to anyone. But at least everyone seems to be doing their best to make her feel welcome. Troy keeps grabbing her hand and squeezing it through the entire dinner.
The group decides they want to play pool after dinner. I tell them that I want to download some books at the library first. But after stopping at the library I decide not to meet up with them after all. I’m still feeling drained from the drama of work. Instead, I head down to the dance floor, get myself a glass of water, and sit down at a small table by myself. I don’t want to socialize, but I don’t want to be alone with my thoughts either. So I sit and watch everybody on the dance floor, allowing the music to blare out any thoughts. I watch a blonde pair whirling around each other. They don’t seem to have a care in a world. I wonder why I have to feel so serious all the time, and why I can’t ever feel that carefree. I’m momentarily resentful of all my responsibilities, and I consider going to Dr. Brant and demanding she make someone else team lead.
“So what is someone so pretty doing sitting here all by herself?” a nasal voice interrupts my thoughts.
“What?” I jump, barely managing to stay on the stool I’m sitting on. I look up to see a squat construction worker in his brown and black uniform, staring at me.
“Why are you sitting here all by yourself instead of dancing?” He gives me a smile, grabs my hands, and half pulls me out of my chair. I snatch my hands back from his sweaty grasp, surprised by his boldness.
“I’m not really in the mood to dance tonight, sorry,” I apologize – even though my impulse is to tell him off. It would feel so good to verbally crush someone right now.
“It’s your loss, sweetheart.” He laughs, turns, and disappears into the crowd.
I sigh. Getting away from my thoughts will be harder than I hoped. At least the construction worker went away easily. I sip my water and look back out on the dance floor. I find the couple I had been watching. They’re both fantastic dancers, graceful as they move despite the speed of the song. They keep laughing as they twirl and dip each other. They are mesmerizing to watch. As I watch, they seem to dance faster and faster. Their arms and legs begin to blur. I wonder how it’s possible. Then, I look around at the other dancers and realize they are moving just as fast, arms and legs blurring.
Something’s wrong. I feel strange.
“I have to get some air,” I murmur to no one in particular. I stand up and start to make my way towards the exit. The room slowly tilts back and forth. I feel like I’m on a small ship during a bad storm. It takes me forever to get to the exit. But I finally do, and feel the brisk night air hit my face. It helps the rocking of the boat, a little.
I start walking in the direction of my dorm. I need to lie down. When I reach one of the east gates, I realize I’ve been walking in the wrong direction. I turn around, and head the other way, mad at myself. I’ve wasted time, an
d I’m starting to feel so very, very tired.
Am I imagining it or do I hear footsteps?
I turn to look behind me, but the motion makes everything whirl around me. I close my eyes in an attempt to steady myself before I fall. I hear cruel laughter behind me, and my fright turns to alarm. I know I have literally stumbled my way into a dangerous situation. I try to walk faster, toward where more people should be. I’m definitely hearing footsteps now. They’re so close.
“Brett?” I turn toward the direction of the voice and everything whirls again. This time I lose my balance. I feel the pain in my hands and knees as they meet the hard gravel of the ground. Now I hear running footsteps. I close my eyes, bracing myself for whatever is going to happen.
“Brett! Are you okay?” an urgent voice asks. The concern in the voice surprises me.
I open my eyes and look up to see Ryan’s blurry face. I try to answer, but my throat is so dry and itchy that nothing comes out but a soft, dry squeak.
“Come on, try to stand up; we gotta get you some help.” Ryan lifts me to my feet and leans me against him. We start to walk back towards the dorms.
I try to explain what is happening, but everything just comes out garbled. “Somun fola me, somtng inme dink.” I can hardly hold my head up.
“Save your strength. I’m going to get you help.” He tightens his grip around me. I’m not going to make it back to the dorms. My knees begin to buckle, and I start to fall to the ground, but I feel Ryan catch me. He lifts me up and cradles me against his chest. I relax into him, feeling his warmth. I feel safe and know everything will be okay now.
I looked up into his eyes. “Rrynnn,” is all I can manage to say, and then my heavy eyelids close.
I wake up in a strange room. Everything is bright white, too bright. I shield my eyes and give them moment to focus before I look around. I’m in a hospital room. Andi is asleep on a couch on the left side of the bed. When she hears my stirring, her eyes open.
“Glad to see you’re alive; how do you feel?” Andi asks with a worried look.
“I feel like I was run over a couple of times.” I groan as I move. A wave of nausea hits me. My head is relentlessly pounding itself apart. “What happened?” I ask.
“I was hoping you’d be able to tell me.” Andi sighs in frustration. “You had us really worried.” Her eyes glimmer with moisture. She squeezes my arm, and I automatically smile at her.
“Us?” I asked, confused.
“Yeah, me and Ryan. He brought you here and then had one of the nurses find me. He only left a short while ago after the nurse tried to kick us both out. He convinced her to let me stay, but he had to go.” She grabs a chair and pulls it up to the side of the bed. I feel a lump forming in my throat. As strained as things have been with Ryan, he somehow knew that Andi was the one person I needed.
I look up and realize Andi is still waiting for me to say something. “The last thing I remember is him picking me up.” I rub my temples, hoping to ease the pounding.
“What else do you remember from last night?” Andi asks anxiously.
I explain to Andi I don’t remember much. I remember sitting down, watching everyone dance, refusing the construction worker’s offer to dance – then everything else was a blur.
“Well, you’re lucky Ryan found you. I’m guessing something was slipped into your water. Whatever it was, you’re allergic to it.” Her hand is patting my arm now.
“Ketamine is the only thing I’m allergic to. It’s an anesthetic. Its street name is ‘Special K’, and yeah, it gets slipped into people’s drinks. But I never left the table, or my water. The only time it was even out of my hand was when—” I trailed off. “Oh… the construction worker. He practically pulled me out of my seat. If he had a partner, I would never have noticed.” I shiver and cringe.
“The doctors had that on your chart, but said it wasn’t that. They’re running some tests now to try to figure out what it was. Right now they’re guessing it’s something from the planet. They were asking me and Ryan if you had been anywhere near the perimeter, where you might have come in contact with something.”
“I was in the base lab most of the day, and all I was doing was cataloging pictures of insects. Before that I reviewed camera footage. I wasn’t near anything, not even the perimeter fence, all day.” I pause and try to remember if I forgot anything. I didn’t.
“Except the construction worker,” Andi points out to me.
“Except the construction worker,” I echo. “The construction crew would have had plenty of time to stumble across some plant or something that had ‘unusual’ side-effects. They could have been looking for something to use recreationally when they stumbled across it.”
“Leave it to you, Brett, to be the first crime victim on the planet.” She sighs dramatically. “At least you’re okay now.”
“That would be my luck,” I groan. My head is throbbing even more now.
Chapter 10
Two days pass before I’m let out of the hospital. I felt better by the end of the first day, but they insist on keeping me for observation. I’m guessing it’s because they truly don’t have much else to do. Dr. Lambert confirms my suspicion by complaining that Andi is right: before me there hadn’t been any crime here, and no cars means a definite lack of car crashes. Plus, everyone here is young and healthy, which means I’m the most excitement he’s had since he pulled me out of the cryogenic tank. He also adds that I’ll probably be the most excitement the doctors will have in the next six months.
I spent a lot of my two days answering the same questions over and over, from both doctors and security. They all want me to give a better description of what the construction worker looked like. Did my water taste funny? Did I see him again after that? Was I sure I hadn’t come into contact with any other new materials that day, maybe in the lab?
Despite getting along well with Dr. Lambert, who kept me entertained with funny stories about himself, his girlfriend, and his coworkers’ drama, I am glad to finally get out of there. I’m tired of all the questions, and look forward to sleeping in my own pod again.
Of course, now that I’m out, I’ll have to deal with everyone else’s questions. I’ll have to explain to my team where I had been. Andi was smart enough not to mention anything to our friends. She figured I could tell them if I wanted to, but she also guessed correctly that I didn’t want all the extra attention.
Leaving the hospital, I run into Brody. I try to ignore him as I walk by.
“Hey, wait up,” he calls after me.
“What do you want?” I snap. I feel all of my frustrations from the last week building up, ready to be released at him.
“It’s been over a week since we’ve seen each other.” He looks confused by my anger.
“Oh, you noticed?” My voice is drenched with sarcasm.
“What did I do?” He seems honestly surprised, which only fuels my irritation more. Either he’s utterly clueless, or he’s this world’s and Earth’s best actor.
“Let’s see. You got mad at me for playing volleyball and diving, and then you end the night without making any plans to see me again. When I finally do see you again, a week later, you blow me off to have dinner with the guys – and again you made no plans to meet with me. I can take a hint.” I attempt to walk off, but he places a hand on my shoulder.
“But I really did have dinner with the guys and I apologized for being so stupid about the swimming thing. I didn’t make plans because I didn’t know when I’d be free again. I’ve been assigned as protection for a science team. My schedule depends on their plans now. I would have found you sooner, but they each keep running back into the field and, of course, none of them can manage to go at the same time. In fact, I’ve been with them the last four days, not even placing foot on the base.” His hand drops down from my shoulder. He takes my hand and sighs.
“Oh.” I don’t know what to say. My anger slowly drains from me. He never intended to hurt me. Maybe I’m just overreacting
. Brody’s emotions are simple, though not in a bad way. He’s uncomplicated. He can look at a sunset and enjoy the beauty of it. He doesn’t start analyzing the components that cause the colors; that’s me, not him. So when he said he had dinner with the guys, that was all he meant. He wasn’t trying to blow me off or send me a message.
“So how about that dinner?” He smiles and pulls me to him. He kisses me on my lips, and I easily relent. I can’t stay mad at him. The kiss is brief, but it’s enough to release a flock of butterflies in my stomach and heat my body with desire. When it ends he continues to hold me in his arms. I lean into him, close my eyes and breathe him in.
“Why does this all seem so hard?” I whisper into his chest.
His warm fingers stroke my face and grasp my chin, lifting it until my eyes meet his. “That’s what I keep asking myself. You drive me absolutely crazy, and I can never manage to say the right thing. If I were smart, I’d stay away from you. We both seem to make the other mad all the time. But I can’t help how I feel about you – how you make me feel when you’re around. No one has ever made me feel anything close to how you do.”
“I thought it was just me who felt that way,” I admit before my emotions choke my throat closed. I can barely breathe, and my pulse races unevenly. I feel dizzy as his hands close around my face. Before he can pull me towards him, I am kissing him, hard and fierce. I put all the words I am unable to speak into my kiss, all the emotions I just can’t define. For the first time, I am able to forget all of our differences and simply feel for him. By the time we pull apart, we are both breathless.
As we walk to dinner hand-in-hand, I’m feeling something I haven’t felt in a very long time, something I doubted I was capable of feeling again.
Monday morning. I brace myself when I enter the lab. I know I’ll have to explain to everyone what happened, and feel the embarrassment of being stupid enough to let someone slip something into my drink.
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