by DJ Michaels
“Like what?” Tansy was intrigued despite her reservations.
Sorcha grinned. “No matter what’s going on in your life, they will be on your side, even if you’re completely at fault. When I first got together with Jax and Kae we had a little hiccup and I went running to their dragons. Jaysada let me sleep in her arms and Tengale wouldn’t let those ass-hats come anywhere near me.” Sorcha reached out and laid a hand on Tansy’s knee. “Truly there is nothing safer than the love of a dragon. If it hadn’t been for Tengale and Jaysada I’d be dead by now, and that alone should have you scrambling into the lair.”
Tansy bit her lip. The picture that Sorcha painted was so very, very tempting. “I know you’re right, but the thought of the dragons crawling around in my head—or anyone, really—makes my stomach churn.”
“Oh, I see what the problem is,” Sorcha said, waving a negligent hand in the air. “You think if you open up they’ll have unlimited access to your mind, but that’s not how it works. Talking to a dragon is like talking to a person. They can hear your words, watch your body language and be guided by your tone.” She turned to face Tansy and tucked her feet up on the cushions. “For example, when we talk I can make an educated guess about what you’re feeling but I can’t read your mind. Neither can Fellescend or Zenbaylan.”
Okay, that didn’t sound so scary. “So they’ll only hear what I think at them?”
“Yes, pretty much.”
That “pretty much” was completely equivocal and raised all sorts of questions. But Tansy knew she couldn’t afford to fight this battle—her sense of safety was too important to her recovery. She’d just have to brazen her way through. Somehow she’d have to hide her emotions from Fellescend and Zenbaylan. Her feelings regarding her ordeal, her phobia and her inappropriate crushes were nobody’s business but her own. Right now she didn’t want anyone, skin or scale, to know just how fucked up she was.
She was still trying to shore up her defenses when Sorcha grabbed her by the hand, dragging Tansy to her feet. Taking advantage of their momentum, her determined friend led her out of the Enforcer part of the den into the section of the living quarters that was the domain of the blacks.
Fellescend and Zenbaylan were waiting, yellow eyes alert and their wings tucked back tight against their bodies. The battle dragons ranged in color from pale gray to blue-black, but Fellescend and Zenbaylan were almost evenly matched in the hue of their smoke-gray scales. Fellescend wriggled in excitement and Tansy was amazed that a creature who was the size of a small plane could appear so puppy-like.
His excitement was contagious and Tansy found herself hurrying forward, her spirits lifting in unexpected anticipation.
The dragons rested on a huge bed of fine, white sand. As Tansy stepped over the low retaining wall, the soft slide of it under her feet reminded her of home. She squished her toes a bit deeper and turned to Sorcha.
“When we were kids, we used to holiday on the beach and the sand was exactly like this.” Her memories of summer always included warm sand, salt-encrusted skin and the smell of sunscreen.
“Maybe we should bring in some water and make sand castles,” Sorcha said.
Tansy grinned. “Maybe Chelsea and I should teach you how to play beach cricket.” She tried to picture her American friend with a cricket bat in her hand, but the image wouldn’t come.
Sorcha laughed but didn’t get a chance to reply because Fellescend ran out of patience. He snorted, enveloping the women in a cloud of smoke and sending them both into a coughing fit. By the time Tansy had recovered, Fellescend had his neck and chin stretched out on the sand, and his nostrils were practically resting on her toes.
Sorcha got the message and gestured her forward. “They like full-body contact. Just lie along his muzzle, wrap your arms around his cheeks and rest your forehead against his.”
Tansy blinked. She was tall for a woman, at almost five nine, yet if she did as Sorcha suggested it would only just bring her to eye level with Fellescend. She shuffled forward, tried not to think about his razor-sharp teeth, and plastered herself to his hard, scaly head.
“Just relax,” Sorcha said, as if it were nothing more than a matter of willpower. “Close your eyes and imagine you can see the natural barriers you have around your mind.”
This was all sounding a bit woo-woo to Tansy, but she stuck with it. Pushing aside her healthy skepticism, she did her best to tune in to Sorcha’s voice and make like a believer.
“Your barrier might look like a wall or a fence,” Sorcha continued. “It might be metal, stone or wood. It might even be pure energy. Whatever it is, it will be unique to you—yours to hold and maintain, yours to lower if you wish.” Sorcha was silent for a moment, and when she spoke again her voice was much quieter. “Tell me when you see it.”
Tansy kept her body relaxed, timing her breathing to the dragon’s inhale and exhale as it brushed by her feet. She did her best to feel Fellescend with her emotions as well as her body, and then she went searching for her walls. To her utter amazement, she quickly came up against a high, impenetrable barrier of solid steel. “I’ve found it.”
“Good.” Sorcha’s quiet voice was full of approval. “Now I want you to concentrate on Fellescend, the feel of him and the texture of his personality. Then I want you to make a tiny door in your wall. A special door, security coded so no one but Fellescend will even know it’s there. Only he can open it, and only then if you let him. Tell me when you have the door ready.”
Tansy was so deep inside herself now that she didn’t even feel self-conscious. And she was so tuned in to Sorcha’s voice she simply did as she was told. She created a door, coded to Fellescend’s DNA, and then she cracked it open.
“He can come in now.”
She hadn’t even finished the sentence when the rush of Fellescend’s energy blew her right out of her trance. She jumped, drew her head back and looked into his sinister yellow eyes.
Pet? Pet, can you hear me?
She grinned like a crazy woman. Yes, I can hear you.
Finally. I’ve been calling and calling for weeks but you wouldn’t listen.
I’m sorry. I didn’t know I could. I wasn’t shutting you out on purpose.
He harrumphed deep in his throat. Well, you didn’t know any better but you do now. He nudged her away with his nose. Now it’s Zenbaylan’s turn. Hurry up.
Bloody hell, from excited to imperious in two sentences flat. She figured she’d just got her first taste of dragon arrogance…and dragon impatience as Zenbaylan muscled her way in.
Sorcha gave her a shit-eating grin. “Second verse, same as the first.”
Tansy rolled her eyes and flung herself over Zenbaylan’s nose, resigned to creating another chink in her defensive wall.
Zenbaylan’s touch was softer and more patient, but when Tansy made a door for her she pushed it open and just kept on coming. Steady, inexorable, making room for herself and establishing her place with an unsettling degree of permanence.
Thank you, pet. You did well.
Bloody hell. Tansy had thought Fellescend sounded imperious, but Zenbaylan could rival an Egyptian pharaoh. She turned to Sorcha. “What now?”
Sorcha’s smile was pure evil. “Now my work is done and you get to spend however long you want bonding with your new master and mistress.” She slapped Tansy on the back. “Good luck with that, sister.”
The smartass turned and left, singing an out-of-tune rendition of “Puff the Magic Dragon” so loud and off-key that it was a wonder the pale-gray paneling didn’t peel from the walls.
Fellescend’s mammoth body shifted and he brought his forearm forward, wrapping his lethal claws around Tansy. She went rigid in his grasp, her proximity to those razor-sharp talons completely freaking her out. Unfortunately her anxiety didn’t slow Fellescend’s motion. Drawing her close, he didn’t ease the pressure until they were practically nose to nose.
We need to talk, pet.
About what? She tried not to hyperventilate, but b
eing held so firmly a breath away from the teeth of a battle dragon would make anyone pee their pants.
We want to know why you won’t let our males claim you.
What now? That wasn’t where she’d expected the conversation to go, and the topic was so surprising that her fear of the battle dragon took a backseat. Fellescend, I have no idea what you’re talking about.
He growled, a low rumble in his belly. Yes you have. You like our males, they like you, it is right that you should mate.
It’s not that simple.
Yes it is.
Tansy had often seen her Enforcers shake their heads in disgust at “dragon logic”, and she was beginning to understand why. Fellescend made it sound so simple and easy, and it probably was to his way of thinking. Unfortunately, from her side of the fence everything was complicated and messy.
She wondered if she could explain her experience in terms the dragons would understand. When I was being held against my will, bad things were done to my mind and my body. Physically I have healed but my mind and my emotions will take a bit longer. It’s not as simple as moving on because I want to. It takes time to process what happened, to sort through my experience and find the best way for me to deal with it and move forward. The kind of hurt I suffered lingers and it’s not the type of thing I can just wish away.
Zenbaylan lowered her head and rubbed her cheek against Fellescend’s claw in a movement that was clearly intended as affection by proxy. Tansy wiggled her arm free and reached up to lay her hand on the black’s smoky scales.
I like your males very much, Tansy said, the admission out before she thought better of it. But I wouldn’t be doing them or myself any favors if I pushed my recovery too far and too fast.
Very well, Zenbaylan said. You can have a week.
Tansy shook her head. It doesn’t work like that. You can’t put a time limit on healing.
Zenbaylan snorted, her breath hot enough to singe Tansy’s cheeks. A week will be long enough. If you’re not ready to move forward by then, Fellescend and I will help you.
Yes, pet, don’t worry, Fellescend rumbled in Tansy’s head. We will have you ready to mate in no time.
Bloody hell, she was being steamrolled by ten tons of scaly, well-meaning muscle and there wasn’t a damn thing she could do about it. Apparently, pet status was going to suck ass.
Chapter Three
The following week flew by and Tansy knew she had to make a decision if she wanted to avoid dragon “help”. Well, that wasn’t entirely true. She’d already come up with a plan—she just had to find the courage to sit down with Rye and Dev and explain to them what she wanted. Yeah, no sweat.
She’d cleared away the dinner dishes, wiped the table and straightened the chairs. Then she spent a good ten minutes talking herself into—and out of—her upcoming conversation. Rubbing sweaty palms on her silk pants, she wandered into the living room. Rye and Dev were sprawled on the plump sofa, their bare feet propped on the coffee table.
She had to clear her throat twice before she found her voice. “Have you guys got time for a talk?”
They turned their eyes to her and every hair on her body stood on end. She had no idea what they saw in her face, but Dev set his feet on the floor and leaned forward.
“We always have time for you, Tansy. What do you need?”
She sat on the coffee table, facing the males with her back ramrod straight. She wiped her hands again. “I have a proposition for you and I’m not sure… I think that…” She licked her lips and tried to find enough spit to swallow. “I want to…”
Bloody hell. If she kept this up she’d have to write them a memo.
Dev leaned forward, grazing a light touch over her knee. “Just start slow and tell us in your own time. We’ve got all night.”
She nodded, reaching up to smooth her black hair even though not a single strand escaped her ponytail. Realizing she was never going to be able to just blurt out her request, Tansy decided to come at it from another angle.
“I come from a family of soldiers,” she began. “You’d call them warriors. From the time I was old enough to fall down or get scared, my father taught me not to hide from my fears. He taught me to attack them head on and keep coming until I conquered them.”
Taking a long, unsteady breath, she tried to quell the churning momentum of her stomach. “Being captured, being forced to…” Her breath started to come short and fast and she wasn’t sure how successful this discussion was going to be. She fought the edge of panic that threatened to swell inside her as her vision blurred. Ruthlessly, she pushed it back, squeezing her hands into fists and concentrating on her breathing until she at least had the illusion of control.
She licked her parched lips. “That asshole took something from me. Something intimate and private that should only be shared when and if I decide to do so.” When she raised her head, she saw she had the Enforcers’ full attention. “I want to try to take that back.”
“And you want us to help you?” Rye asked.
“Yes, if you would.” Her stomach rolled in a sickening lurch of anxiety and her skin prickled hot and cold. “If it’s not asking too much.”
Rye slid off the couch, coming to rest on his knees at her side. Slowly he reached out and covered her interlaced, white-knuckled hands. His palm was warm, a little rough and incredibly comforting.
“We care about you very much, Tansy, and we’ll help you in whatever way we can.” He rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand. “Are you telling us you want to be more than friends?”
She nodded, her eyes a little wild as she met his steady, lavender gaze.
Rye edged a little closer and placed his free hand on the middle of her back. “It hasn’t been that long since we rescued you. Are you sure this is the right course of action?”
“Yes.” As soon as she spoke, the steel disappeared from her backbone. “No.” Damn it.
Tansy rubbed her forehead as if she could massage some sense into herself. “How can I know anything for sure? I’ve spoken to the healers and to the other rescued women, but the truth is we all process trauma in different ways. What works for them isn’t going to work for me and vice versa.” She dropped her free hand and laid it on top of Rye’s, squeezing tight. “I’m a fighter, Rye. I don’t know how to be anything else. I fought Willersby Lockmehdyhn when he had me trapped in his apartments, even when it would have been smarter not to. How can I stop fighting now?”
Rye flipped his hand over and bought hers to his mouth, kissing her fingers. “We’re fighters too—it’s the defining characteristic of an Enforcer. If you want to fight to get your life back, Dev and I will stand beside you, swords drawn.”
She looked at Dev, marveling at how eyes so icy blue could burn so hot. “Whatever you need, no question,” he said. “But I would like clarification. You need to tell us exactly what you want.”
The thought of articulating her needs, of saying the words, set her heart hammering. Her stomach soured and she couldn’t get enough air into her lungs. Squeezing Rye’s hand for all she was worth, she looked into his eyes and silently begged him to say yes.
* * * * *
Rye stroked the back of her hand with his thumb and tried not to let the fear and despair in those light-brown eyes slay him where he sat. He’d been aching to do something for her, to help her in a tangible way. He’d never believed this was what she’d want from them, despite his private fantasies.
“You want us to make love to you, Tansy?”
She nodded, her eyes pooling with tears. If she cried, he was fucked. He had a little experience with emotionally damaged women, but that counted for nothing here. He cared too much for Tansy to risk getting this wrong. Slightly panicked, he looked over his shoulder at Dev.
His denmate moved from the couch, pivoting to sit next to Tansy on the table. Watching her like a she-dragon with a chick, Dev reached out and put his arm around her shoulders, easing her against his bigger body. She tensed a little but didn’t pull awa
y.
“How about we go slow and easy?” Dev asked, his voice soft. “Tonight we’ll just touch each other—hands and mouths. That way you can get used to us being close and naked. We can come or not, we can play for a long time or a short time. No pressure, no expectations. How does that sound?”
Tansy shrugged. “That sounds slow.” She let out a big sigh and her brows drew together in a frown. “I just want to get it over with.”
As soon as Rye saw her impatience, he realized what his denmate was doing. Tansy was after a quick fix, but if she thought one night of sex was going to erase two months of torture and captivity, she was in for a big disappointment.
He placed his hand on her thigh, high enough that her brown eyes snapped in his direction. “You’re a warrior,” he said, relieved that at least in that sense they shared a language. “Think about this tactically. You don’t want to commit everything in the first offensive. You need to do some reconnaissance, invest some time in specialist training and have a few practice runs. We may not get this right the first time. The three of us need to put ourselves in a position where we can fail in safety. If we get it right, then good. If we don’t, we can regroup and try again.”
Dev looked over Tansy’s head and mouthed “thank you”. Rye let his eyes smile back before he returned his attention to their pretty house guest.
“Slow and easy. No pressure. What do you say, honey?”
Pleasure lit her light-brown eyes. “Honey?”
Rye shrugged. “We asked Chelsea about Earth endearments and she gave us a list to choose from. When I asked her what honey was, she said it was a sweet nectar produced by an insect that can give a painful sting when provoked.”
Dev pulled her closer. “We think it suits you. Do you mind?”
“No, I like it.” She smiled at them, a real one with a hint of mischief. “And I like our tactically sound plan. Shall we put it into effect?”