by Dee Mann
Priya's color deepened. She was speechless.
Did Jillian really tell these women I'm a whore? Was it all an act? Has she been setting me up for some kind of humiliation?
"Oh, look at you. Blushing like a virgin. Your clients must love that. But come on, let's go in and get settled. Jillian, Jenna and Liz will be here soon." She checked her watch. "Their yoga class should be wrapping up right about now."
"Wait a second," Priya barked, her eyes flashing with fury. "I don't know what the heck is going on here but I am not some kind of prostitute. I don't know who told you people what but there is no way…" She stopped as she realized Maggie was collapsing with laughter. Her fury became confusion, then understanding.
"This was all a joke?" The anger was returning.
"Oh, lord, I'm sorry," Maggie managed to get out as she forced herself to stop laughing. "I really am sorry. That was so bad, even for me. Please don't be mad, Priya. Jillian made us all promise to be on our best behavior at dinner 'cause this was your first time and she really likes you, but when I saw you standing there, I don't know, something came over me and I couldn't help myself. Please don't hate me. I swear I never would have done it if any of the others were around. It's just that Jilli told us you were like really sweet and nice and innocent, and, well, you know, and the thought of you being a hooker was so polar opposite to who she said you really are that I…"
Priya's fury cut her off. "I don't believe this! Jillian told you all I was a virgin?"
Maggie started and shook her head, suddenly at a loss for words. "What? A…did you…are you…oh my go…" It was her turn for incredulity.
It took only a second for her reaction to make Priya realize she'd jumped to the wrong conclusion. How could she have done this again? She paled as she realized that now everyone in the group would know.
"Oh Priya, I'm so sorry. My stupid joke made you say something you obviously didn't want…damn." She moved in closer, until the two were only inches apart. "I know you don't know me yet but you can trust me. I swear I will never speak of this to anyone. Not even Jillian. Please believe me. And please forgive me for being such a bitch. Fuck! I feel terrible now."
Her agitation seemed to spin out of control. She moved back a step and smacked her forehead three times with the heel of her hand, just like in the movies. "Stupid, stupid, stupid! Look, I really am sorry. I'll just go. Don't even tell anyone you saw me and they'll all just think I couldn't make it this week." She turned to leave.
Priya suddenly wasn't sure what to make of it all. Clearly the woman was upset over what happened, but she couldn't let her leave like this.
"Maggie, wait. Please don't leave. Someday, I promise you I'll get you back big-time for that joke, but the rest was my fault for assuming something instead of finding out for sure. It's really not that big a deal that you know, although I would appreciate it if you didn't say anything to the others. If we all get along and I start coming regularly, I'll probably eventually tell them. But for now, it would just make things weird. Okay?"
There was no mistaking Maggie's relief. "Okay. And thank you so much. Maybe this will teach me a lesson. Then again, knowing me, probably not. But thank you for being so nice about it." She chuckled. "What a pair we are. The virgin and the slut."In response to Priya's surprise, she added, "Oh, I wasn't kidding about that part. I've been with more guys than I can remember. Hundreds."
"But why?" Priya asked.
"I told you. I like guys, I like sex, and I like variety."
Priya's eyes focused on Maggie's as she pondered her explanation. She saw something, felt something, but was unsure of what it was. After a few seconds, she shook her head slightly and muttered, "No, I think it's more complex than that."
"What?"
"I'm sorry, it's nothing. Just thinking out loud. Why don't we go in so I can meet the other girls."
Maggie was introducing Priya to Gloria, Marissa, Holly, and Shandra as Jillian, Liz, and Jenna arrived. The women took turns asking Priya questions about her background and work. Everyone was polite, almost to a fault, but something was wrong. Despite Jillian's assurances that Priya was a regular person, there was tension around the table. The usually open and free banter was missing. Nobody was telling jokes, nobody was ragging on anyone. It felt more like a gathering of old society mavens than a night out with the girls.
Soon, Maggie could stand it no longer. "What the hell is going on here tonight?"
Everyone turned to stare without responding.
"We're all acting like some kind of pod people because Priya's here? A really pretty girl comes along and all of a sudden we're all so insecure we can't relax and be ourselves?"
Again no one spoke.
"Well that sucks."
She turned to their guest. "Priya, I'm really sorry about this. Usually we're a pretty wild bunch but obviously some of us find you intimidating. So screw it. If we can't have fun tonight, I want to at least learn something. Do you mind if I ask you something personal?"
Priya wasn't sure what to expect, but anything was better than the strained geniality of the past fifteen minutes.
"Not at all. Ask away."
"Look, this isn't the kind of thing I'd normally ask someone I just met, but I'm sure everyone here is dying to know the answer."
She paused for a few seconds as all the girls fidgeted with curious expectation. Then, when even Priya had leaned forward slightly in anticipation, she pointed at Priya's chest and asked, "Are those real?"
Priya blinked twice, then broke into a gleeful smile. She flashed on the day a few months ago she'd used a similar shock tactic to make a point with her new co-workers. Then she took in the expressions of the girls around the table, met Maggie's eyes again, and said, "One hundred percent real. Why? Do you want to feel them or were you looking for a referral?"
The entire table erupted with laughter. All it took was that one simple exchange to prove she really was one of the girls. The ice had been broken and the conversation began to flow as, now, everyone really wanted to get to know her.
Ten minutes later, as the waiter was taking orders, Priya caught Maggie's eye. A slight smile and nod of her head conveyed her thanks. Maggie's return grin and raised eyebrows told her she was welcome and the look in her eye told her something more. She had made another new friend!
11:40 PM
"Ohmygod," Rob panted. "That was amazing."
His breathing slowed but his eyes remained closed, his face contorted. After a minute or so, he blinked his eyes open to find Lisa watching him, beaming with pleasure and satisfaction.
"What are you grinning at?" His hand reached out to caress her cheek, then drifted lower to her breast.
"I was just watching you. Your face was all scrunched up and you were making those noises and you seemed to be in such pain. Maybe we should stop doing that." A soft, "Mmmmm" escaped her lips as his other hand joined the first.
"Stop? Sure we can stop. Want to stop this, too? Or this?" His right hand drifted lower.
Lisa squirmed and lay forward on his chest. Her arms snaked around his neck as her lips sought his. Rob tugged his hands out from under her, hugged her close and began to lightly scratch between her shoulder blades as they kissed.
A few minutes later, when her head was resting on his shoulder, he asked, "Where did you learn to do that? What you did before. Should I be getting jealous? Or worried?"
"You bet. I found a guy who knows lots of new tricks."
"Oh really? What's this new guy's name?"
"Hector."
"Hector? You mean Hector from work? Gay Hector?"
Lisa laughed and leaned up so she could see his eyes. "Yes, gay Hector from work."
Rob looked doubtful. "How does Hector know about, you know, girl parts and what to do with them? Especially something like that!"
Lisa cocked her head to the side and said, "I don't know. I never thought to ask him. But from your reaction, it sure seems like he knew what he was talking about!"
&n
bsp; Rob's arms drew her back down. Her head settled back onto his shoulder. "So this is the kind of thing you two talk about at work, eh?"
"Sometimes. It's just girl talk."
Rob chuckled as he rolled them both on their sides. "Girl talk? With a guy?"
"A gay guy. A very gay guy."
Rob continued chuckling as Lisa grabbed the sheet and dragged it over them. When she settled back down, he began to gently stroke her hair. "You know…I've been thinking."
"Always a dangerous activity."
Rob faked a scowl but it quickly turned into a smile. "Seriously. Do you love me? I mean, really love me?"
‘Don't I tell you I do every day?"
"You do. But please answer the question."
"Yes, Robbie, I love you." Then, dramatically, "I really, truly, deeply, madly love you."
His face lit up with a grin. "Ah, you're only saying that because you're still horny."
Lisa feigned indignation. "So what if I am?" She reached under the sheets and took him in her hand. "A fat lot of good this guy will do me. He won't be ready again for an hour."
"Is it any wonder after what you just did to him?"
They both started laughing. Lisa marveled at the ease with which their intimacy came. There were no head games, no needy reassurances necessary. Rob was a good lover and he knew it. He knew how to please her and was willing to try almost anything to make her happy. She leaned in and kissed him softly on the forehead. "I do so love you, Robbie."
With a satisfied sigh, he said, "And I love you, too."
They settled in, arms around each other, and simply enjoyed the feel of skin against skin. They fit so well together even their breathing soon synchronized, one inhaling as the other exhaled, and the gentle rhythm lulled them to sleep.
FRIDAY, MAY 21
12:05 AM
"Thank you for inviting me," Priya told Jillian as she hugged her. "I had a really nice time. The girls are all great. I hope you'll have me again sometime."
Jillian laughed. They were standing inside the door to the restaurant, waiting for Liz and Jenna who'd stopped by the ladies room. "What are you talking about, ‘have you again'? You're part of the group now…if you want to be." She reached out and touched Priya's arm. "I hope you'll want to be."
"I do! But I thought you all had to vote or something."
Again Jillian laughed. "No. If anyone had any reservations about you, they'd have let me know. Now, you heard Jenna say that next week we're going to Sabatino's in the North End?"
Priya nodded.
"Jenna always picks a place in the North End when it's her turn. She loves Italian even more than I do. As the newest member, you'll get to pick the spot for the following week. That is, if you come next week."
"I don't know if I'll come, but I'll definitely be there."
It took almost a second to sink in. "Priya! I can't believe you said that!"
It was Priya's turn to laugh. "I know! I think it's this town. Lately, I've been surprising myself with some of the things I say. But you know what. I like it. It feels good to let go, even if it is just with words."
A minute later, Liz, Jenna, and Maggie emerged from the ladies room and joined them.
Jenna's head tilted. "So?"
"She's in."
"Excellent!" Liz turned to Priya. "You know, some of us were a bit nervous about the prospect of you joining the group."
"I sort of had that feeling when Maggie and I walked in earlier."
"Well, Jillian kept telling everyone what you were really like, but I think most of us couldn't get past how friggin' beautiful you are."
Jenna agreed, and added, "But when you came in dressed like that and you sort of blew everyone away with being, I don't know, just a girl like the rest of us, well, all I can say is everyone would have been very disappointed if you hadn't wanted to join the group."
Priya was pleased, but slightly embarrassed. She wasn't used to women treating her like this but she said a quick, silent prayer she wouldn't wake up and find the night was all a dream.
Liz yawned loudly and asked, "Anyone want a ride?"
Jillian nodded and Priya said, "Sure, but I live out in Brighton."
"Where in Brighton?" Maggie asked.
"Royce Road. It's the first street on the left after the intersection with Harvard Ave."
"I'm going that way if you don't mind riding with me."
"Not at all. That would be great."
Ten minutes later they were sitting in traffic on Commonwealth Ave., waiting for the light to change.
"You know, you were very impressive tonight."
"Thank you. I was pretty nervous going in and it got worse when everyone seemed so uncomfortable. But what you did, what you said, that was perfect. It really was inspired. I don't know how to thank you."
"No need. Let's call it even for the joke I played when we…Son-of-a-bitch!" Maggie jammed on the brakes as a small car flew out of the side street just after the light had changed, cutting her off.
Priya could see five heads in the car jerking around as if they were laughing or partying. "That's why I don't drive in this city."
They talked about Boston drivers for the few remaining minutes it took to reach Royce Road.
Maggie stopped the car in front of Priya's building, shifted into Park, but left the engine running. "Can I ask you something personal?"
"Sure." Priya turned to face her.
"You don't have many girlfriends, do you?"
Priya tried to see into Maggie's eyes in the dim light from the streetlamp and what reflected from the car's headlights, but the shadows were too deep. "What makes you ask that?"
"Your nervousness early on, and then you seemed so happy that everyone liked you. Little things you said and did, or maybe more the way you said and did them. Plus, I don't know, a little undercurrent of loneliness, I guess. Forgive me if I'm wrong. It was just a feeling."
Priya was impressed this woman read her so well. "You're right. Jillian's my only real girlfriend, and that only happened recently." She grinned and snorted. "I guess you probably knew that. And there's Lisa. She's Paul's best friend's girlfriend. We've sort of been getting friendly."
"Can I ask you something else?"
"Of course."
"What did you mean earlier, when you said you thought it was more complex?"
"Huh?"
"Before we went into the restaurant, I told you I was the group slut and you asked why and when I answered, you hesitated for a second and muttered, ‘No, I think it's more complex than that'."
"Oh." Priya fidgeted a little.
"Please, you won't hurt my feelings or anything. What did you mean?"
"I, ah, well, I had the feeling you were putting on a face, playing a role and saying what you thought I expected to hear, or maybe what you wanted me to hear, rather than the truth. I…never mind. It's nothing."
"Say it. Please. You what?"
"Maggie, I'm certainly no authority on sex. Heck, I'm as far from it as you can get, but I can't believe any girl sleeps with so many men simply because she likes sex. Surely you've been with many men who were great lovers. If good sex was all that mattered, why not stay with one of them? Or a couple of them? No, there's something more going on. Something happened to you. I don't know what, but something made you want to or need to hide part of yourself from the world. Something hurt your heart and…"
Priya saw silent tears glistening in the dim light as they ran down Maggie's cheeks. "Oh, Maggie, I'm sorry. I don't know what I'm talking about. Please don't cry. I wasn't trying to hurt you."
"No. No, you didn't hurt me. You…you're right." The tears flowed full force now. "You…nobody's ever seen that before. Nobody's ever wondered enough to even ask or care."
Priya leaned awkwardly across the center console and put her arms around the distraught girl. "It's okay. It'll be okay."
"No it won't. It'll never be okay. You know how I could tell you were lonely? Because I'm so lonely I want to s
cream sometimes. Everyone thinks ol' Maggie's life is all fun and games. But it's not. Some women eat and some women throw themselves into meaningless work. I fuck a lot. I fuck so I can feel someone next to me, so I can feel alive, so I can…"
She started shaking as she cried and Priya realized the girl who'd been so lively, so much fun at dinner really was a façade. Inside was a woman who longed for companionship and love, but didn't know how to find it. Or wouldn't let herself find it.
"Maggie. Would you like to come in and talk for a while? Why don't you park over there and come in."
"No," she replied between sobs, "you have to get up for work in the morning. I don't want to burden you with all this."
Priya leaned back and rested a hand on Maggie's arm. "You are not a burden. I'd like to think of you as my friend. And when you know me better, you'll find out I am always there for my friends. Please, you need to talk. You need to tell someone what's bothering you, what's haunting you."
Maggie didn't accept, but neither did she refuse. Priya sensed she wanted to be convinced. "I have beer and vodka and coffee and… Hey! We can have a grownup pajama party. Come on, we can both call in sick tomorrow if necessary, but this is way more important than work."
An automobile horn honked behind them.
Maggie smiled and wiped at her eyes with her fists. "You're not just being kind? You really want me to come in?"
"Yes, I really do."
"Well, I suppose I do know your secret, so it's only fair that you know mine."
12:35 AM
Paul hit the mute button and grabbed his cell. "Hi sweetie."
"Hi yourself. I thought you'd be sleeping."
"Nah. I decided to watch The Tonight Show and wait for you to call. So how'd it go?"
"Fine. Priya was a big hit and now she's part of the group."
"I'm almost sorry to hear that. I was getting used to hanging with her on Thursday nights. Maybe I'll take up bowling or something."