by S Lawrence
I stand in silence, waiting. His hands are clenching and unclenching with worry. "Brother, tell me what is bothering you so much."
"I don't like this whole situation. Everything is unknown. How do I protect you both if I have no idea where the danger is coming from or what it even is?" Sean confesses to me.
"Why can't we protect each other?" I inquire. I hate the wall he has erected around himself, one that cannot be breached, even by me.
Chapter 14
CORA
I strip my wet undergarments off quickly, the cold air biting at my skin. I had dug through Sean's pack and found more clothes he has brought for me. I smile sadly thinking about how that man just breaks my heart. The vision showed me his last thoughts, the anger at his failing and his wishes for Michael. He even had sadness that I had been lost with them. Still, he doesn't believe what everyone else knows. Michael was something totally different; he was resigned to his death, welcomed it even, ready for the end of the nightmares, the memories. His last thoughts were only for us to survive.
Being a seer does have benefits; I know there is something beyond. Something waits for us after we leave this world. My last thoughts were of my faith, faith in these two amazing men and faith in Yggdrasill. I have to believe she didn't bring us here to fail.
I'm just finishing dressing, sitting to pull on thick socks, and my shoes. I hope they keep my feet warm, I don't believe if it will make a difference in this frozen wasteland.The sound of a zipper echoes in the quiet as Hel appears before me, shimmering and transparent. Her voice whispers through my head, 'I'd look if I were you,' her voice is dripping with interest.
"Can they see you?" I whisper, and her head shakes as a grin splits her face. I slowly turn my head, letting my hair hide my face as I look through. Sweet Mother of God. Commando. My mouth falls open. I don't realize I've turned fully until Michael pauses as he pulls up his pants, his amused eyes locking with mine. Sean is tucking himself in his pants when he notices me, and my face heats to scalding. I need one of the church fans we always carry around the city. I will never get that picture out of my head. Raven is one fucking lucky bitch.
"I have plastic bags you can put the wet things in. It will keep the other things dry." Sean’s deep gravelly voice rumbles over me, and the woman in me can appreciate that sound. Adding that to what I just saw, for one moment, I imagine him whispering seductive things on a hot humid New Orleans night. I shiver. "Are you still cold?" he asks, noticing my little movements.
I laugh and look up at him through my lashes. "No, sugar. Not cold at all." Bless his heart, the puzzled look on his face is priceless. Michael shakes his head over Sean's shoulder, and I grin at him. He's just too easy. Lacing my boots, I jump to my feet and walk away, calling over my shoulder, "You should change too." I'm going to try my best to keep my eyes to myself, but damn, I might peek. After seeing them my imagination is running wild on me.
I wander away, looking for the way we might be supposed to go. My gift is failing me, showing me nothing, and other than the waterfall, I can't see anything at all in the distance. The ice looks like crushed diamonds, sparkling in the light. The silence is crushing, pushing in on me.
Damn! I shake my head, trying to clear the x-rated images running amok. What had I been think? Oh yes, the well?
I turn back to look at Hel, but she was no longer there. Shit. 'Follow the river.'
"Thank you," I reply on a grateful sigh. "We need to follow the river, so we should go back toward the waterfall." I squint and point in the general direction.
"Umm, Cora..." Sean starts to speak, and I hold up my hand, refusing to look at him.
"We don't need to ever speak of this," I screech a little louder than I meant to. "It'll be forever burned into my brain," I mumble under my breath, as I start to the falls.
"Don't worry, I got your bag." His gravelly voice is filled with laughter as he calls to me.
"Good," I call back.
We've been walking for days it seems, okay hours but still. The barren landscape is boring me to tears and is doing nothing to help with naked Michael and Sean follicking through my brain. A giggle boils up and escapes at the idea of them frolicking. That earns me a look from Michael, so I shrug and shake my head.
He hands me a water bottle and a bar of some kind. "Ye doona want to be dehydrated."
"Thanks. You think it is much farther?" I wonder, and it's his turn to shrug. Sean moves ahead, and I watch his back as I eat. "He's guarding us… Right?" This time he gives me a nod. So much for small talk. I look at them both, gauging their moods. Sean's shoulders are tense, and Michael seems distant, lost in thought.
"So, what do you plan to do about Raven? Share her?" I let the question drop like a bomb. Aislin and Emma had told me they had been avoiding any discussion of her. Well, other than the ‘keeping her safe’ talk. I don't care about that. I know what she thinks of them; the idea of both men intrigues her a great deal. I feel my power flare to life and I stop as what I assume is a memory plays in my mind. Whose memory, I'm not sure but I was right when I guessed they were a package deal. Fuck, that's hot.
"CORA? What dae ye see?" Sean face is barely an inch from mine, and Michael's right beside him. I blink, trying to break free of the memory and I realize I'm panting. "Did it scare ye?"
"Um, no. It wasn't something that is going to happen. I think I saw a memory or a fantasy.”
"Whose?" Michael's voice is smoky and warm.
Jesus, I'm doomed. I can't get away from it. They aren't even trying, which makes everything so much worse. I scream in my head 'I need to get laid' before pasting a serene look on my face.
"I'm sorry. I think it was one of yours, I'm not sure exactly. I was thinking about you both and Raven… Ya know?" I grit my teeth and close my eyes. "Anyway, the next thing I know, it's like a porn in my head." I look up towards I don't know. At home, it would be heaven but here it's… Whatever. Jesus, take the wheel, please get me out of this. Sean's booming laughter makes me cringe. "LOOK, I don't have control of this yet!" I shriek in embarrassment.
"Did ye like whit ye saw?" His now unsexy voice booms at me. Yes, now I hate his voice.
I stomp away, shoving through them, thrusting my middle finger high in the air as I go. Their chuckles follow me, and soon I hear them jogging to catch up. I whirl around and glare at them. Hands on hips, I am just about to let them have it when I hear a voice. It is faint and I can't make out what it is saying. They stop and look around, both heads tilted, eyes closed. It sounds again, and Sean's eyes whip open and he starts running forward. Michael is hot on his heels, and I'm bringing up the rear, like way behind them. Sometimes I really hate my tiny legs. My arms are pumping like an action hero, but I look more like a toddler. They've stopped -- thank God -- and I catch up in a few minutes.
"Thank Jesus no one was chasing us. You guys completely ditched me." No response. I look around them as I lean over, hands on my knees, gulping air. Oh, I get it now. My eyes widen, trying to understand what I'm seeing.
Chapter 15
RAVEN
I draw a deep breath and pause outside the hall. My father's warning is ringing in my ears, but I had to return. Odin would be suspicious if I didn't. Ragnhild would as well. Rarely do I think of her as mother. She doesn't possess a maternal bone in her ancient body. I am the reminder of Loki's trickery. I don't know the whole story, but even he admits it had been a mistake. Although he does make it very clear it was the action, not the result, that was the mistake. Not so much with her.
I slip on my mask, the one I wear while I'm in Valhalla. Shoving open the doors, I stride in, the picture of confidence and determination. Warrior through and through.
"Wonderful! You're just in time to joins us for our meal," Odin's voice calls out to me, and I smile before lowering my head in feigned reverence. His hand sweeps to the side, and I move to my chair at his left. Ragnhild is as always on his right. I study them for a moment, wondering at their true relationship. Freya left his bed long
ago, if she was ever even there.
I don't miss the plethora of eyes that are cast my way. This room is full of enemies, both known and unknown. I hold my head high, daring any to come after me. I already know they will not, not straight on. They accuse my father of being the Trickster but in reality, they all are. Their smiles show sharpened teeth, ready to tear me apart if it will help them in their schemes. I sit and slouch back, indifferent to their dislike. I learned long ago, I wasn't wanted here but merely kept as a tool. A tool they used to hurt those I care about. The conversation flows freely all around me. I don't join in any of their banter.
"Where is my brother, I wonder?" It isn't a casual question, and I look up at Odin and shrug.
"I haven't seen him since I was here. I was at home, getting some rest after my time with the humans. The many wars going on and the warriors dying in battle batter at me constantly," I apologize.
"Were none worthy?" My mother asks with a sneer. She always believed none were ever worthy.
"Many are worthy but most aren't. Most don't believe any longer, so their hearts do not call out." Ragnhild's face plainly says she doesn't believe that they are. I refuse to sit and argue with her.
"What about those two you watched? They are warriors, aren't they?" I force my body to remain relaxed at that personal inquiry. I look at him and nod my head.
"Yes, they are and they believe. I'm positive if they are to die in battle, I will be called to them." Inside my heart clenches and my sweat begins to bead as I fight to control my emotions while he studies me, looking for my weakness, suspecting he may have found one.
He eventually breaks eye contact and leans back. "Well, I look forward to meeting them in time."
I don't relax; I don't believe his pleasant tone or fake disinterest. I must tread very carefully. "I wish you luck. Freya will likely find them most worthy." He stiffens at the reminder of his 'wife' getting first picks.
I return to eating and respond to a question from another down the table, all the while my attention remains solely on Odin and Ragnhild as they lean close together, whispering. Long into the night, the food and drinks flow in abundance, and I'm stuck here until he releases me. I long ago grew tired of his games. I am about to speak to him, ask to leave and visit with my goddess, when a howl rings across the land. There is no mistaking it, Fenrir is on the hunt. My head whips around, and I come to my feet.
The next moment, I am in a dark cave. Odin. I run to the opening but rebound and hit the floor hard. He locked me in with magic. I scream and try to reach out with my own power, but it sputters and dies. My eyes widen at the implications. I may never leave this cave. Not alive anyway. I let everyone down. Another howl rings out, and I worry for Fenrir. I also wonder if he found Aphrodite yet.
If she is here in our realm, it can only mean someone here is helping her or is in league with the Order of Sceach. It is as I feared. I sink to the floor and stare out at the night sky, my anger building. For a thousand years, I have done what was asked of me. Never did I take anything for myself, sought to build a real life for myself and now, just as I catch a glimpse of a future possibly filled everything I could desire, it will be stolen from me. I picture the Druids as they were when I left them, sleeping, their skin golden and marked with symbols of their beliefs. Cora's words echo through my head. I have been stupid in my denial of my feelings for both. But I didn't want to choose and by hesitating, I may lose my chance to truly know them.
I am worried for my father and try to reach out to him, but my powers cannot break through Odin's shield. Angry tears begin to fall, splashing on the stone floor of the cave and echoing in the silence that wraps around me. Despair begin to filter through me, knowing how trapped I feel. Ragnhild will come for me soon. She will finally be able to rid herself of her greatest mistake, her greatest embarrassment. Or they may not even bother. How long can I live without food or water? Days for certain, a month, most likely. I will slowly wither and die, gone mad from hunger and thirst. This is not a comforting thought.
"Please find me," I whisper to no one as I curl in a ball on the floor. I would fight but there is no use; I have seen the magnitude of Odin's power, felt a sliver of it turn on me before, as he punished me for some perceived slight to him. I can do nothing but wait. But I will be ready and if I'm given the chance, I will fight. A war is brewing, and I pray we win it. I have seen the cruelty of Odin and Ragnhild; they will destroy the Earth and enslave any humans that survive. It was his plan from the beginning, one he tried to gain control of Ylva for. It is no secret, but if he has been working with the Order, that is something no one will forgive. Especially not those I now call friends.
Part II
"I don't want to forget;
I want to be okay with remembering."
~ri derek
Chapter 16
SEAN
A head. Just a head. No body, and it is speaking. I think my brain is moving in slow motion. I'm having a hard time understanding this. The others are also frozen in place. Cora's body is still folded in half, her head at an awkward angle, and Michael's eyes are narrowed as he too tries to comprehend what we are seeing.
"Well don't stare. It's rude." The voice is clear, and its owner is clearly unhappy with our shock. Cora slowly straightens and tries to recover from the shock. "Why are you here?"
"Yggdrasill sent us. We are on our way to the Well of Fate," I reply, after finding my voice.
"SHE sent you? Sent humans through her roots? Interesting. I am Mimir. What do you wish to learn?"
"Just the way to get to the next well," Michael speaks, his voice firm as his eyes constantly look around. I can tell he also has a weird feeling about this place and this... well...head.
"Only that? Truly? Most ask for much more of me." His eyes narrow, focusing on us all, and his power rushes at us. It crawls through me like thousands of bugs under my skin, and I fight the need to claw at it. My eyes slide to the side, and I can see Cora is losing the battle. I reach for her hand as Michael grabs her other, her skin bleeding a bit from her frenzied scratching. Her head is shaking back and forth.
"Cora!" I yell at her, trying to get her to snap out of her terror. Her wild eyes lock on mine and silently plead for my help. Suddenly, the sensation is gone. Her hands squeeze ours in thanks before rubbing down her arms. I don't miss the shiver that runs through her body. Michael apparently didn't either since he shifts closer to her.
"Now, see, I told you most ask for other information, more information than they really want. I will give you the answers to the real question that you each have." His voice is filled with something that worries me. "You first, I think." I flinch as his eyes land on me. "I will answer your question and then tell you the way. But only after, not before."
I glance at the others, worry creasing their foreheads. We must find out the next path. I wonder if this is another test. They both nod in agreement, and we decide that we will listen.
"Oh good. Sean Scott, come closer and learn your truth." His voice is a little sing songy in his obvious glee. I am not prepared for what comes next. He begins his tale.
'It was not your mother who left you at that orphanage. In reality, she was angry you were gone -- her beautiful, golden haired boy. So sweet and fair, everyone noticed. She was an addict and in the beginning, she traded herself for the drugs she craved. That is how she got you. She did that for a long while until you were five and the man who came, witnessed you playing in the other room. The sunlight shown through the window, lighting your curls like a halo.'
My heart is pounding, and a cold sweat is covering my body.
'That man told your mother that day he no longer wanted her for the drugs. Her gaze whipped to you, and she shook her head, refusing. Her refusal lasted three days, and then her addiction won the battle. She called that man, and he came with her drugs. She left him there with you, retreating to the alley behind the apartment building to shoot the elixir into her veins. She lost herself in ecstasy while you screamed for
her to help you.'
Memories of putrid breath and dirty hands crash through me. I fall to my knees, eyes squeezed shut, trying to lock the door on that room in my mind. His power is pushing the images, things that have been locked away in my mind, to the front.
'Week after week the man came, each time she left you for her drugs. Each time, you screamed for help but none came. Until one night, as she lay passed out in the next room, an elderly man crept in and carried you from that room. He snuck you away in the dead of night, after hearing your screams through the paper-thin walls of that apartment for months. Taking you far from the city, deep into the highlands, he took you to the orphanage. He thought you would be safe. But you weren't, were you, Sean Scott? New horrors waited for you there. The answer to your question is yes, she looked for you but only because she wanted her next fix.'
I feel the tears streaming down my face as I try to catch my breath. The images he is forcing on me show me exactly what I am. I shake my head in denial. But now that the door is opened, I can't deny what was my life. I can't deny what she let them do to me. I can't deny that she never loved me. I was nothing to her, not worthy of her love. Arms come around me holding me tight, lips near my ear, and I lash out. I'm blinded by fear and shame. I keep swinging until I finally the screams break through my rage. I force myself stop, and my vision begins to clear. Michael is bleeding on the ground, and Cora is crying. What have I done?
"Oh shite, Michael. I'm sorry. I didnae ken it was ye." My hands are in my hair, and I stare at them, lost. I just proved my point. I am too worthless -- I just hit my best friend. I could have killed him in my rage.