by Aja Cole
“You called the right cavalry, young man. Introduce me to everyone.”
Jax makes the introductions, and I find out the other woman is Camilla or Cami, Chris’s little sister.
“We brought you your weird ass pizza combination.” Alena pipes up. “It’s in the oven.”
“Okay, barbecue chicken pizza is not weird.”
“It is when you add broccoli.” She rises, and we hug, moving closer to the table. I ruffle Jesse and Jamie’s hair, both of them ducking.
But my eyes are drawn to Jax again because I haven’t really seen him in two days and it’s like my body feels better now just being around him.
He looks as rough as I did before I got it together and I know it’s because he’s been worried.
“Can I talk to you?” I ask, and he nods. I follow him upstairs to his room and he closes the door. I cross my arms, wondering how to start.
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry.”
We look at each other, and I give up trying to make sure I have the right words.
I kiss him with all the emotions that I don’t know how to voice. Opening my mouth wider with his, he deepens the kiss and I melt under him, tongues tangling lazily as he strokes into me again and again. It fills a place in my soul that he’s been adding to since he laid next to me on the field and told me about the things that made him who he is.
“You don’t have anything to apologize for.” I stroke his face, pressing my forehead to his. “Well, not really. But next time, maybe let Nikki change downstairs and not in your bedroom and you know, disclose those things.”
“I will. Maybe we can work on you giving yourself a break sometimes. Your career isn’t all you have, even without it, you’re an amazing woman.”
“I know.” I swallow. “Kind of, more now.”
“I don’t want to break up over the kids thing, Sienna. I don’t know if your mom told you what I—,”
I put a finger to his lips, shaking my head.
“I appreciate that you’d respect my decision not to have kids if I chose that, but I’m not ruling it out completely. I…want to talk to someone. A therapist, make sure I start developing healthier patterns and talk about how my parents divorce really affected me. But, I can compromise. I’ll consider kids, just not immediately, okay? Don’t go poking holes in the condoms or anything just yet.”
“Deal. I want you to have everything you’ve ever dreamed of, Sienna. I mean that. I’m right here, I want to be right here cheering you on.”
“You’re too good for me.” My lips tremble, and he shakes his head.
“I think we’re good for each other.” He lifts my chin, those blue eyes filled with more love than I’ve ever seen.
“I love you.”
His eyes widen. “I definitely thought I’d be the one to say it first.”
“Sorry, I’m an overachiever.”
“I love you too, Sienna Grace Davis.”
“You know, I don’t know your middle name.”
“Antonio,” He smiles, breathtaking in a way that a man has never been to me before.
“Jaxon Antonio Blake.” I say, and he tugs me back with him, sitting on the bed. I straddle his thighs, wrapping my arms around his neck. “I like it.”
“I’ll be sure to pass along your appreciation to my mother.”
I lower my lips to his neck, pressing small kisses there. “Mhm.”
“So…” He starts as I lick my way up to his ear, stealing one of his favorite things and tugging his earlobe with my teeth. “What if I told you I’m about ten seconds away from passing out cold.”
I pause, pulling back and checking him over. He does look a little exhausted.
“I would say that there’s plenty of time for us to catch up.” I rub my thumb over his cheek softly.
“Thank god.” He sags a little and I hug him to me, stroking my hand through his hair. “Let’s kick everybody but your mom out, get some sleep, and revisit this in the morning.”
“I’m right behind you, playboy.”
I don’t know what time it is, but I feel like I’ve slept enough and I’d rather stare at Jax.
Inky dark lashes fan his upper cheeks, longer than any man’s lashes have a right to be. This close, I see the small smattering of freckles on his cheeks that haven’t gone away. A nose with the slightest tilt to it and new facial hair that’s making him look like a mountain man.
I raise a hand to stroke his face but stop before I make contact, my hand hovering in the space.
He deserves his rest.
I close my eyes and start to pull my hand back, but I didn’t realize that Jax isn’t asleep anymore.
When he takes my hand and presses it to his cheek, my eyes fly open to meet his heavy-lidded ones.
Neither of us speak, but I move closer under the comforter so that my arm isn’t stretched. Now I’m close enough that my elbow is bent and our faces are inches apart.
He presses my hand against his face again, and when he removes his, I take it to mean he wants mine to stay there.
I stroke the tips of my fingers lightly against his cheek and move them over his forehead, down to his other cheek and over the bridge of his nose. I run them over his beard and tug it playfully. I skim over the softness of his lips before I rest my hand in its original place.
I love this man.
He turns his head so his lips meet my palm and I shiver. There’s full heat in his eyes.
I close the space between us and lay my lips on his. He takes care of me, turning my desire turning into something sharper. Our lips slide and press against each others, and my lips open under the soft nudge of his tongue. The gentle tickle of his beard makes me smile wide and he pulls back, raising an eyebrow but not breaking the silence we’ve kept this far.
Somehow it feels like anything more than this, more than this quiet intensity, and the moment will shatter.
I move to taste him again, but he moves away with a smirk and I don’t stop the small sound of disappointment from leaving my throat. The hand he’s sliding over my side squeezes my waist, and I move to him again, but stop just before we touch.
He has to meet me this time to make up for denying me.
He does more than that. This time, his kiss is less reserved and more demanding. His lips lead mine in a sensual dance of push and pull, and I press my body to his, needing to be as close as I can get. Gasps and labored breathing replace the silence, and I dig my hands into his hair, slanting my head and savoring this. Him. Us.
He rolls me to my back with his body, settling himself between the space my legs create easily and keeping his mouth fused with mine.
Hot. It’s so hot. I break away and pull impatiently at my shirt, and he helps strip it over my head. I cry out when he immediately sucks a nipple into his mouth, plumping my other breast with his hand before he lavishes it with the same attention as the first.
He throws the comforter off for good and jerks on the band of my shorts while I raise my hips. A strangled noise escapes him, most likely because I’m not wearing underwear.
This is two people colliding again.
He’s a man who knows what he wants, and he zeros in on my clit with slow, firm licks before he licks his way between my folds, worshipping me in a way that has me twisting the sheets in my hands and wanting to scream.
When he moves to leave me, to get protection, I let him and then immediately hook my legs around him.
A shudder rolls through his body and he pins my hips in the middle of the bed, stealing my breath again with his kisses as his bare hips move against mine.
Reaching a hand down, I spread myself for him as he rubs his thickness against my wet slit. He presses inside and I open my mouth soundlessly against his, becoming more breathless with each inch that fills me.
“Perfect.” He growls against my lips when he’s fully inside. He pushes my hair back from my face with both hands, pressing his forehead against mine and closing his eyes. When he opens them ag
ain, they’re blazing with so much more than arousal. “So damn perfect.”
I close my eyes because it’s too much, and he lets me, pressing a lingering kiss to my neck as he withdraws completely and pierces me again slowly.
It’s the sweetest agony I’ve ever felt.
“I just want to feel you.” He whispers, voice hoarse. “I never want it to end.”
For long moments, it feels like it won’t. Like we can stay inside this dark room and lose ourselves in this feeling indefinitely.
Each time his hips meet mine and my nails rake helplessly over his skin, his lips playing at my ear and my heels pressing against his back…I lose a little more of myself in him.
I lose a little more caution, and find a little more of what I didn’t even know I was searching for.
When my trembling has eased and fine sweat mists us both, he buries himself inside me one last time and squeezes me in his arms.
I never want him to let me go.
Sienna
“I’m liking the power suit, wine is definitely your color.”
“Thanks Mom, I like yours too.” I wink and the elevator doors open. With one last reassuring look at each other, we step off the elevator and head towards Caroline’s office.
I stop at Trisha’s desk. “Is Caroline in today?”
“Yes. She’s actually in the conference room, do you want me to let her know you’re here?”
“It’s fine, I just need a quick word.” I smile, heading down the hallway. I see Caroline sitting at the head of the table in the room alone, those glasses sitting on the table next to her laptop.
Pulling open the door, I let my mom enter first, and follow her.
“Sienna. I didn’t expect to see you back so soon.” Caroline stands, and instead of greeting her, I pull out a chair and sit primly. I can’t believe I never realized how fake her smile is.
My mom does the same, pulling a folder from her bag and setting it on the table.
“I’m sure you didn’t.”
She looks between us. “Who’s this?”
“Caroline, meet my mother, Deirdre Maxwell.”
“I’d shake your hand, but I don’t like to get mine dirty.” My mom smiles thinly and Caroline looks shocked.
Amazing. I silently applaud my mom.
“You might want to sit for this, Caroline.”
She sits.
“You made a mistake.” I start. “The minute you decided to punish me for your wayward son instead of making him accept responsibility for how disgusting he is. The minute you forced me out of my job to reflect on my actions when I did nothing wrong but trust you.”
“Now wait a minute,” She starts.
“As counsel for Miss Davis, I’d advise that you let her speak.” My mother’s voice is tight and brooking no room for disagreement.
Caroline quiets, her already pale skin blanching.
“So, here’s what we’re going to do.” I lean on the table, holding her gaze. “You’re going to resign from your position.”
Her mouth drops, and she sputters. “And do what? Promote you?”
“Don’t be ridiculous, I don’t want any title you’ve held and frankly, I think my time here at H&S has come to an end.” I didn’t know I was going to say the words before I said them, but it feels right.
I started here, but it’s time to move on. It’s time to move on from a lot of things and not be afraid of not knowing exactly what’s next.
“No, I just don’t think you deserve your position when you use it to abuse your power and cover for your pathetic offspring.”
“And if I don’t?”
“I—.”
“I think I can explain this one, sweetheart.” My mom speaks up and I sit back in my chair, letting her have the floor. “These,” she flips open the folder, sliding it in front of Caroline, “Are backup copies of all the sealed records from numerous harassment claims filed against your son that you made go away. My daughter is too sweet to do so, but I won’t hesitate for a second at spreading your family business to the masses because you made the mistake of messing with mine.”
It looks like Caroline is about to have an entire heart attack. I would feel bad for her if I didn’t feel so vindicated.
I can’t believe I yelled at Jax for speaking up for me, for those women that Tyler did the same and maybe even worse to. Never again will I care about what people might think more than what’s right. What feels right for me. That would make me more like Caroline than I’d ever want to be.
I look at my watch. “I have a lunch with my wonderful boyfriend to get to. But to recap, I hope to see a press release about you stepping down very, very soon. If not, I don’t think I’ll be able to prevent my mother from doing whatever she feels is necessary.”
“And if I do this, you won’t release these papers?”
“Correct. I will not release these papers.” I tap the folder, and she takes a deep breath.
“I will turn in my resignation today. I think it’s time I took more time to be with my family.”
“Good for you.” I stand and my mom does the same. “You’re not helping him by covering up for him, you’re only making sure that he never owns up to his mistakes.”
“You know nothing about being a mother.” She hisses.
“But I do.” My mom steps in front of her, chin high. “And I know a little something about exceptional women. It’s unfortunate that you are not one of them.” With that parting shot, my mom walks ahead of me and I follow, not giving Caroline a second glance.
I’m going to talk to Kat privately, but not today. Today, I want to have lunch with my boyfriend and relish in a small victory and a step forward in a better direction for me.
We wait for the elevator side by side, arm in arm. Stepping in, my mom pulls out her phone.
“Hey Liam, remember that story you might be able to break tomorrow? I have a few more details to send over. Mhm. Exactly. Okay, you take care and tell you mom I still want her apple pie recipe. Of course, haha, bye now.” My mom hangs up and I slide my eyes to her, smile spreading on my face.
“All set?”
“All set. That boy will wish he’d kept his hands to himself many, many times over by the time Liam is through with him.”
“I can’t believe she just thought it would all go away, that’d we’d just protect him too.”
“It’s not our problem anymore. Now, what are you doing for that man for Valentines Day tomorrow? Lord knows he deserves something for dealing with you.” She teases, winking.
You only have one mother, and I’m damned glad that this one is mine.
It’s Valentine’s Day morning and I’m sitting next to the toilet, stroking Jax’s hair as he pukes at an alarming rate.
I run my arm up and down his back, murmuring stuff that I hope is soothing.
“I’m sorry.” He moans, and I laugh, shaking my head.
“Hey, is it an ideal morning? No. But we’re together, and that’s what matters. Even if it’ll be me tending to you in bed all day.”
“I knew I should’ve heeded the expiration date on that clam chowder.” He gags.
“I won’t say I told you so since you’re suffering already.” I wet a hand towel and wrap it around his neck, dabbing the sweat from his forehead.
“I don’t think I have anything else to throw up.” He dry heaves, and he looks so miserable. I help him to bed and sit next to him.
“There goes my grand Valentines plans.” He croaks.
“There goes my grand Valentines plans.” I tell him. “It’s great that you and Nikki got the Gatorade contract squared away, there’s tons of it in the garage. I’ll grab some and get some ice chips so we keep you hydrated.”
I get down to the kitchen and move aside Jax’s protein ice cream, which tastes terrible to me. I wouldn’t touch it with a ten foot pole, I want all my fatty, sugary, wonderful tasting calories.
The carton seems empty anyway. Opening it to check, I see that it’s completely cl
ean, there’s just a rectangle shaped box inside of it in a plastic bag.
This seems expressly like it’s meant to be hidden from me.
Which is exactly why I can’t possibly just leave it alone.
I take it gingerly from the plastic bag, opening the red velvet box.
“Jax,” I whisper to myself, fingering the diamond and topaz tiger hanging from a delicate necklace chain.
I love it. So much.
I can’t let him know that I saw this, so it’ll still be a surprise. Sliding it back into the bag, I put the carton exactly where it was and get the ice chips I initially came for.
When I get back upstairs, Jax is asleep and I curl up next to him, resting my hand on his heart.
The same way he talks about supporting me, I want to be here for him, in whatever he does. I’ve never thought of myself before as the girl that wanted happily ever after, but in this moment, I’m just glad that I didn’t get what I thought I wanted.
Instead, I got exactly what I needed, in the form of a wide receiver with more love in his heart than I could’ve ever imagined.
Jaxon Blake is mine.
And I pray and hope that I’ll forever be his.
Epilogue
Jax
“It’s so nice being my own boss.” Sienna licks at the Ben & Jerry’s cone and I can’t pull my eyes away from her tongue. “I would’ve never taken impromptu trips during the day if I still worked for someone else.”
“Don’t I get any credit for loosening you up?” I eat my own mint chocolate chip with a scoop of double chocolate on top. I can’t exactly come onto her walking down the street.
We were in Athens for the Spring G-Day Game. It’s basically a game for everyone missing college football, and let’s the coach showcase new players and progress. It’s a nice day for family too. The last three years, Sienna wasn’t able to come with me, so I’m glad she came today.
The rest of the family went back to Atlanta already, they had something to get ready for. Her mom moved to Atlanta, and she and my mom became fast friends. Deirdre even has a boyfriend. Jamie’s taking a gap year in Spain and we Skype whenever we can, and Jesse just graduated from Johns Hopkins but is coming back down to Emory for medical school. Chris and Alena are trying for a baby, and Sienna and I are letting them have that honor for a while.