by Chris Mullin
No one spoke. ‘I can tell by your silence that you all think I’m loopy,’ said Colin gloomily, walking away. But we didn’t actually. ‘The reason for my silence was that I agree,’ said Ed Miliband after Colin had gone. He added, ‘The trouble is that we are all held hostage by what he decides.’
Tuesday, 14 March
Awoke to a horrifying discussion about asylum on the Today programme. Edward Leigh (chairman of the Public Accounts Committee), who obviously hadn’t a clue what he was talking about, was allowed carte blanche to resurrect the asylum bogie. Later, John Humphrys, sounding more like Richard Littlejohn, ranted away at the immigration minister, Tony McNulty (who is already ruthless enough without being pushed into greater excesses), demanding to know why we were not sending home more. No one mentioned that many of the worst offending countries – Iran, for example – won’t accept back their citizens or that there is no government in Somalia to negotiate with (indeed there’s a famine underway there at the moment). We’re already sending back people to death and destitution in such places as Angola and the Congo, what more do they want? Later, I bent Edward Leigh’s ear on the subject. He was a bit sheepish and more or less admitted that he didn’t know much about the subject.
Wednesday, 15 March
For the second week running my name came up at PM’s Questions. I asked one suggested by Nick Raynsford and for the second week running was duly rewarded with a non-answer. More than ever The Man dwells in the stratosphere, floating above us, only visiting our little world for an hour or two each week. He has long ago worked out when he will leave and nothing that happens between now and then is going to make much difference.
At least that what’s I thought until early this evening, when Angela Eagle whispered that there was a big new crisis brewing. It appears there is a secret list of mega-donors, most of whom have featured on honours lists and who have loaned the party vast sums on terms which remain opaque. It seems that no one told the party treasurer, Jack Dromey, and tonight he has gone public, demanding an inquiry. According to Angela, when the subject was raised at the parliamentary committee this afternoon the blood drained from The Man’s face and his replies became monosyllabic, a sure sign that this is a big one.
Earlier I had a quiet chat with Bob Ainsworth (Deputy Chief Whip), who was surprisingly frank. ‘What are we going to do about him? He’s becoming outrageous. Like Louis XIV – l’état, c’est moi. Sooner or later there will be a coup attempt.’ A couple of hours later Jack Dromey launched his Exocet.
Thursday, 16 March
The loans crisis has blasted our difficulties over the Education Bill off the front pages. It looks like a scam designed to get us round the disclosure laws on party funding that we are so proud of having introduced. Apparently, a similar scheme was put to Dave Triesman when he was General Secretary and he vetoed it. Likewise Charles Clarke when he was chairman. So they just waited until someone more pliable came along. It’s clear The Man is in this up to his neck. Indeed he admitted as much at his press conference this morning, at which he appeared uncharacteristically chastened. The sums involved are much larger than has so far been disclosed – at least £10 million. Goodness knows how the party was ever supposed to pay it back. Technically it’s legal, but it stinks to high heaven. The Tories on the whole are keeping their heads down, as well they might since they’ve been into this sort of thing much longer than we have.
‘We’ve lost our moral and political compass,’ remarked Colin Burgon, whose gloom increases with every passing day.
Sunday, 19 March
Sunderland
A couple of deeply demoralising hours canvassing for a council by-election in Millfield. Only a handful of those who claimed to be Labour supporters offered any indication that they will actually vote. Even those with postal votes seemed to lack the energy to fill them in. Not necessarily a symptom of our present difficulties, at least no one referred to them, merely of overwhelming, mind-numbing indifference, a feature of the times in which we live. Only catastrophe or the threat of it will wake us from our slumber.
Monday, 20 March
Perhaps it’s my imagination, but I get the feeling that the loans-forpeerages crisis has peaked, at least for the time being, although the stain will linger for years to come and may yet hasten The Fall. Today the party published the names of our 12 lenders who made loans and Charlie Falconer announced an inquiry into party funding, to be conducted by a retired mandarin, which will ease the pressure for the time being. The hacks, of course, are doing their best to keep it going. A naive young woman from Newsnight called and asked if I’d like to ‘discuss the impact’ on The Man, a theme that’s been done to death already. She lost interest when I suggested that the more interesting question is how are democratic politics in Britain to survive, given (a) that the two main parties are effectively bankrupt and (b) the public are against all the available options: joining, donating and state funding? Time to resurrect Mike O’Brien’s idea that every taxpayer should be given the option of making a modest tax-free donation to the political party of his or her choice.
Wednesday, 22 March
The media are still hammering away at ‘Blair’s millionaires’ (whose identities have been voluntarily disclosed) while simultaneously displaying a remarkable lack of curiosity about the Tory donors whose identities the Tories are resolutely refusing to reveal. The suspicion is that some of them are foreigners. Dennis Skinner is said to have given Jack Dromey a bollocking at yesterday’s meeting of the National Executive Committee for taking his complaint ‘outside the family’.
PMQs was curiously subdued. Cameron steered well clear of the tricky issue of party funding and from our side came only risible lollipop questions. In the end Alan Haselhurst punished us by calling a succession of Opposition questions, instead of following the usual practice of alternating. The Speaker’s secretary told me afterwards that the teenage bother boys in Number 10 were on to him at once, demanding an explanation. How dare they?
Thursday, 23 March
Steve Byers says The Man thinks that Jack Dromey’s outburst was a coup attempt. Unlikely, but an interesting insight into his state of mind. Steve also says, as though it were common knowledge, that Jack Straw will be Gordon’s deputy. I’ve long suspected that was what Jack was aiming for, but hadn’t realised it’s a done deal. You have to hand it to Jack, he has managed to slide from one camp to the other without creating so much as a ripple on the surface of the pond.
Saturday, 25 March
Sarah went for a walk in the park this afternoon WITH A BOY. ‘Don’t worry, Dad,’ she said as she was leaving. ‘He’s not exactly Mr Darcy.’
Monday, 27 March
My visitors this afternoon included the chief executive of Groundwork, an environmental agency which was part of my many responsibilities when I was at Environment. I asked how many ministers he’d had to account to since we were elected. ‘We’re on our tenth,’ he replied. ‘And from the government’s point of view it’s wholly counterproductive.’
At this evening’s meeting of the parliamentary party, which was addressed by Gordon, Dennis Skinner hijacked the proceedings with a long rant, apropos the ‘loans for peerages’ row, about the inadvisability of hanging out our dirty washing in public. ‘I hear the word “transparency” trotted out every ten minutes. I wasn’t born into a world where we all said, “Let’s be transparent.” It was “Whose side are you on?”’ He warned our select committee members against too much inquiring. ‘This is not the moment to get us into a deeper mire than we are in. This is the time to come to the aid of the party.’ Applause was modest. There were grim faces at the top table. The trouble is that the world into which Dennis was born is not the one in which we live today. JP said that the National Executive was determined to regain control of party finances. A couple of people pleaded for a smooth transition and were heard in embarrassed silence. Then David Winnick said something about not being in favour of selling peerages (as if anyone is), which set Den
nis off again. There was agitation on the top table. I could hear JP murmuring, ‘Come on, Dennis’, but no one dared shut him up. It was a full 20 minutes before Gordon’s turn came.
Tuesday, 28 March
The Tea Room
I was sitting with Bob Ainsworth lamenting the money we had lavished on the salaries of doctors and consultants (which is partly responsible for the current NHS funding crisis) when we were joined by Alan Milburn, architect of the present pay structure. He was unrepentant. ‘The real story,’ says Alan, ‘is that in many places hospitals have been so successful at reducing waiting lists that they have run out of work. They need to start reducing staff. There is nothing wrong with a few unemployed doctors and nurses. Until now we have been dealing with a monopoly provider. We need a labour market in the NHS, just like there already is in other areas of the economy.’
Alan also thinks we need to scrap tax credits and instead reduce taxes for the poorest. ‘Tax credits are based on the belief that the state can micro-manage people’s lives – and it can’t.’
‘A fundamental philosophical difference between yourself and Gordon,’ said I.
‘It is,’ said Alan.
This evening, in a crowded room at 1 Parliament Street, Andrew Tyrie and I took evidence from the wife and brother of two British residents trapped in Guantanamo. They have been treated disgracefully. Arrested in Gambia, ghosted to a secret prison in Afghanistan, where they were grievously mistreated, and from there to Cuba. Until now Jack has refused to authorise any representations on their behalf on the grounds that they are not our responsibility, but lately there have been signs of movement, prompted by the revelation that one of them appears to have been co-operating with the security service, which promptly washed its hands of him as soon as he was no longer useful. The poor woman has been left on her own to bring up five children aged between three and eight. Unlike their father, they are all British citizens. She said the oldest boy asked the other day, ‘Mum, why don’t I give Dad my passport, then he can come home?’ Mr El Rawi, whose brother is the other captive, remarked afterwards, ‘I grew up hating Iraq for what it did to my father. I don’t want these children to grow up hating Britain for what it is doing to their father.’
Wednesday, 29 March
To the Home Office to see Charles Clarke re my concerns over the removal of children to dysfunctional countries. He was very affable, coming out in person to collect me from the waiting area. I begin to suspect that beneath that man-in-a-hurry, all-business exterior a decent heart beats. As ever, he moved swiftly to the point: ‘What’s your solution?’
‘First, stop removing families with children to places like the Congo, Angola, Sudan. No need to call it an amnesty. Just stop doing it. Second, if you must remove them, then make an arrangement for them to be met and re-integrated at the other end.’ Charles promised to reflect and report back after Easter.
Thursday, 30 March
To Brewster House to see Mum, who is in reasonable spirits, all things considered. She suffers from two unshakeable delusions: (1) that Dad died only a few days ago and (2) that she has recently been back to Manor Drive. That apart, she is entirely compos mentis. As we sat in the conservatory among the gaga she remarked astutely, ‘It must make you shudder to think that in 20 years’ time you might end up like this.’
Friday, 31 March
At this evening’s surgery, a family of Sri Lankan asylum seekers. Father, mother, three lovely daughters, all at Sarah’s school. The father’s story is that his sister married a Tamil, whom he subsequently employed in his wholesale grocery business, thereby bringing down upon his family the wrath of the security apparatus. He has lost two brothers, one arrested and not heard of since, one murdered (they produced photos of his funeral); his house was shot up and his business burned. The poor man is traumatised and clearly believes he will be killed if he is sent back – and who is to say he won’t? Even the judge who turned down his asylum claim pleaded for him to be allowed to stay, but the Home Office is having none of it. Tony McNulty, the immigration minister, won’t even talk to me about the case. What am I to do?
These intractable asylum cases occupy more and more of my time. My current caseload includes two Congolese, a woman from Sierra Leone with a 16-month-old child and a family of Angolans. They all face either destitution or torture (and in some cases death) if returned and yet, increasingly, I have to look them in the eyes and say there is nothing I can do to save them.
Saturday, 1 April
Awoke before six, still worrying about the Sri Lankan family, to say nothing of one of the Congolese whose benefits have been cut off and who is only surviving on handouts from other asylum seekers. Unable to sleep, I went downstairs and, for light relief, read Nikita Khrushchev’s account of the Great Terror.
Wednesday, 5 April
The singer Gene Pitney has been found dead in a hotel room, a few hours after giving a concert in Cardiff. What a way to go. Not for him the long, slow decline into frailty and incontinence. He just closed his eyes and went to sleep with the applause of the crowd still ringing in his ears.
Friday, 7 April
A letter from David Graham, chairman of the local hospital trust, saying it is £4 million in deficit, despite being one of the best managed in the country. Just under a million is accounted for by increased heating bills, which is fair enough, but £1.8 million is, he says, down to the underfunding of centrally agreed pay awards. In other words the trail leads back to Gordon.
Sunday, 9 April
I am becoming short-tempered. The smallest difficulty can render me apoplectic and sometimes distraught. The symptoms were always there, even in adolescence, but lately they seem to be returning with a vengeance. Madness? The onset of Alzheimer’s? Who knows? The cause, I begin to suspect, is a growing sense of failure. A feeling that I let down Dad during his long, terrible final illness and that now I am letting down Mum, albeit she is difficult to help. That, plus the fact that I no longer have anything useful to do in politics. Yet every day I count my blessings: good health, lovely children, money in the bank. I read the other day about a cotton farmer in India who committed suicide over a debt of £390 – the cost of Sarah’s school trip to France – which he had no hope of repaying. He had a 16-year-old daughter, too. What would he have given to change places with me?
Easter Monday, 17 April
That foolish woman Margaret Hodge has caused a great fuss with a statement that eight out of ten of her Barking constituents are contemplating voting for the BNP in the local elections. Result, acres of airtime devoted to earnest discussions on the unlikely prospect of a BNP electoral triumph, endless vox pops with whingeing, disaffected inhabitants of the East End benefit culture who are allowed to claim – unchallenged – ‘Labour’s done nothing for us’ and that everything is being spent on migrants. On Today this morning a chillingly plausible BNP spokesman (introduced as ‘Dr’ somebody or other) was given a prime-time opportunity to state his case. All courtesy of Margaret Hodge.
Wednesday, 19 April
The Man was shamelessly brilliant at Question time, insisting that it was a matter for rejoicing that we had the highest-paid doctors in the world. The truth is, of course, that we’ve allowed ourselves to be completely conned by the British Medical Association into paying over the odds for work most doctors were already doing.
I came across Margaret Hodge in the library corridor and gave her a piece of my mind. She appears to be in denial.
Friday, 21 April
A new row over Cherie Blair’s latest extravagance. Apparently she charged the Labour Party £7,500 for having Andre, her hairdresser, attend upon her throughout last year’s election campaign. Yet more fuel, if any were needed, for the notion that the New Labour elite live on another planet from the rest of us. One can’t imagine Norma Major or Mary Wilson needing a personal hairdresser or a life-style guru let alone a £3.6 million house. Whatever one thinks of Gordon, there will be none of this nonsense when he and Sarah move into Nu
mber 10.
Charlie Falconer rang this afternoon to discuss party funding. We had a long chat about the overall state of play. He remarked that, despite everything, the Tories don’t seem to be making much headway. Maybe, but the sad truth is that the punters loathe us all in equal measure and with every new faux pas the pit gets deeper.
Monday, 24 April
Angela Eagle says she has been told by Andrew Tyrie, the Tory MP who is charged with drawing up his party’s policy on funding, that a Tory government will certainly ban all donations from trade unions. She also says there is talk of a Blair Foundation, à la Bill Clinton, so that when he goes all the corporate cash will go with him and the party will be left high and dry. Après New Labour le déluge.
Tuesday, 25 April
A new disaster looms. The Home Office this afternoon has admitted that for at least the last seven years it has failed to implement any deportation orders against foreign criminals on completion of their sentences. Murderers, rapists, paedophiles, you name it, they have all been simply released back onto the streets. Worse, it seems that the ministers were alerted months ago, but nothing was done. Illegal migrants and paedophiles, a toxic mix. The tabloids will go bananas.