by Lesley Jones
My stomach churned as I listened to his words. I looked over to Rocco, who was shrugging his shoulders and shaking his head in an ‘I warned you’ gesture.
“That’s a lot of fucks you just threw out there. Drink your beer and try one of Rocco’s party smarties. They’ll make you feel better, I promise,” I told him.
Rocco, listening to the conversation, unwrapped Haley from around him, calling Maca and I over to the bar.
“You need to chill out and enjoy the party, man,” Rocco said.
“Your girl loves you, right? She’ll understand when you explain that Lennon had you all on a curfew, surely?” Maca shrugged.
“Well, if she don’t, then you two are gonna have some serious issues in the future. Like I told Marley earlier, you guys are heading for the big leagues. You’ll be playing in places where trying to get a call out is impossible and life’s gonna get so crazy, you’ll barely have time to take a dump. So, she best get used to going a few days without talking to you.” He patted Maca on the back as he spoke, coming across all brotherly and caring.
“Now, try one of these and enjoy your night off. In fact, take two and a couple lines of this. I promise, life will feel good again, my friend.”
Maca looked at me, “What you had?” I shrugged and smiled as I danced to Dead or Alive’s, ‘You Spin Me Right Round.’
“What’ve I had? A good fucking time, that’s what I’ve had. All while you’ve been running around, trying to find a payphone so my sister doesn’t kick off when you eventually speak to her.”
I watched him as he looked at the drugs lined up on the bar―two E’s and two lines of coke. He shook his head, bent down and snorted the coke, then washed the two pills down together with a swig of his beer.
“Shit,” I exclaimed, “you should’ve done those pills a couple of hours apart, not together like that.”
“You just told me to chill so bring it on, I’m ready to party. I’m sick of feeling like I’m being pulled in every direction.” He wiped his mouth on the back of his hand. “I’ve asked G to marry me,” he announced out of nowhere.
I closed my eyes for a long moment. Everything was tilting sideways around me and I felt panic rise in my belly. It was all gonna come true ... everything Rocco said would happen was gonna happen. I took a deep breath in through my nose and looked at my best mate.
“You must want your fucking brains tested.”
“I love her, and I want her with me. I knew you wouldn’t get it.”
“Why, Maca? Why do you want her with you? So she can witness all of this?” We both looked around the pool area. Everyone from the tour had taken over the space from roadies, technicians, riggers, even backing singers. Tears for Fears, ‘Everybody Wants to Rule the World’ started playing and everyone joined in, apparently knowing the words to the song. We were a collective―a group of strangers that had bonded after travelling, living, and performing together, and for once, I felt like I was a part of something. I didn’t feel like a loner or the odd one out, and I didn’t want it to end. In that moment, I realized how much I truly loved my job, my band, and being on tour.
We had a whole day and night off, spending it in a hotel and not on the road, so everyone was making the most of it and partying hard.
“Well, you gonna answer the question? What d’ya think George would say to all this? I gesture with a nod of my head to the scene unfolding around us. “There’s topless women, for fucks sake Maca, some of them are naked. There’s girls kissing each other girls kissing boys andI swear, there are at least two couples over in the middle of the pool having sex. Everyone is either drunk, stoned, high, or like me, a combination of all three.” I made sure to point out everything that would make George hate it here. “If she sees this first-hand for herself, she will never trust you when you’re on tour again I told him straight. I knew my sister, I knew exactly how she would react to what was going around us that day.
“She won’t have to worry if she’s with me. Your mum and Dad are never gonna let that happen unless we get married, or until she turns eighteen.”
“Then fucking wait―wait until she’s eighteen. Let her finish her education so we can enjoy these next few years on the road.” He raked his hand through his hair as I spoke.
“Marls, I can’t. I need to have her near. What if she goes off to college and meets someone else? What if she decides that this isn’t the life she wants?” Was he serious?
“Maca, I know she’s my sister, but Georgia’s a good girl. She’s only ever had eyes for you since she was eleven years old.”
“What if you propose and she is allowed to travel with us? She’s gonna see shit like this happening all the time. What if she still decides that this ain’t what she wants, that this life isn’t for her? What’ll you do then?” He closed his eyes and tilted his head up to the sky as I spoke.
“I don’t know ... I don’t fucking know. She’s so young, Marls, she thinks she knows it all, but she has no idea. She’d hate this, and she’d hate knowing I was around this shit.” He gestured with his chin towards the debauchery going on all around us.
“You need to let her go, Maca. I know you love her, but you need to let her finish her education and you need to concentrate on the band. Then, in a coupla years, maybe think about settling down with her. We’ve got plenty of time for wives and babies. Let’s just focus on making Carnage the biggest band ever first―that, and enjoying what it brings with it.”
“I can’t let her go and I won’t, not for the band, not for anyone. I’ll tell you straight up, Marls, if it comes to the band or G, she’ll win every time ... Every. Fucking. Time.”
My heart rate accelerated. I needed to do something to make him see that the band was more important than the fucking fairy tale he thought he had going on with my sister.
Please bear in mind I was eighteen, stupid, and selfish. We’d worked so fucking hard to get the band to where it was and we were so close to seeing all our dreams come true. I just couldn’t see beyond that. I’m not trying to make excuses for how events unfolded that night, or the part I played in them, but I was manipulated as much as Maca was. I may not have been innocent, but I was set up the same as he was, and I’ve never forgiven myself for what happened over those next few hours.
If I hadn’t behaved like a selfish little prick, I have no doubt that Sean and Georgia would’ve been happily married with a family, years before they ever were. Everything would’ve been different. They would never have been out on that icy street on that freezing cold December afternoon, and I sure as shit know that my best friend and my nephew would still be alive today. I live with this every single day of my fucking life, but being the wanker that I am, I will never let my sister know the part I played in changing the course of her life. I lost her once for a few years, and if she knew the truth, I know without a shadow of a doubt, I would lose her forever.
CHAPTER TWO
1985
A few hours later, we got kicked out of the pool area after numerous complaints to the hotels management and we ended up crammed into Rocco’s hotel suite.
Maca was dancing on a table, sandwiched between a very naked German girl, and a little Spanish girl who was grinding her bikini-clad arse onto his dick. I watched as the frӓulein reached around, trying to slide her hands into his shorts, but he pulled them away and placed them on the Spanish girl’s hips, who in turn grabbed them and placed them over her tits.
Maca’s eyes caught mine as I watched. He winked and smiled, raising his beer bottle in a ‘cheers’ gesture and in that moment, I made the decision that ultimately changed my best mate’s life.
We were about to make it big as a band. The last thing we needed were girlfriends or wives around us. I loved my sister, but I wouldn’t let her bring an end to it all. And at the end of the day, ultimately I’d be doing her a favour. It would gut her to see what her Sean was doing right then. He loved her, but with that much fanny on tap, I knew that at some stage, he’d get shit-faced and end up
shagging one of the band slags, or some other random that would offer it up to him on a plate. So yeah, I was totally doing my sister a favour and saving her a lot of heartache by showing Maca exactly what he’d be missing out on if he kept George around.
I found Rocco and got a couple more pills from him. I slipped one into Maca’s hand with a wink and popped the other into my mouth, washing it down with the cold beer.
‘Relax’ by Frankie Goes to Hollywood started to play and the whole room started to move as one to the music.
Haley White appeared from nowhere and wrapped her arms around my neck, moving her hips to the beat of the music against mine. I was hard in an instant. She was wearing an oversized Kombat Rock T-shirt and when I slid my hands underneath to squeeze her arse, I realised she wasn’t wearing any knickers.
The effects of my second ecstasy tablet hit me harder and much quicker than the first, and I suddenly felt like I could hear in colour. My dick was throbbing and Haley White was the most beautiful thing that I’d ever seen.
She kissed along my jaw and whispered in my ear, “Get Maca. I want to feel you both inside me at the same time.”
I nearly came in my pants as she followed her request off with a kiss that involved her tongue licking every part of the inside of my mouth.
“Tell him I’ve got some great blow, but I don’t want to share. We need to go back to your room and just keep it for ourselves.”
She kissed me again and I had to push my hand down flat on my dick to hide my boner while walking over to where Maca was still dancing on the table. I pulled him down by his hand and he stumbled as he landed beside me and laughed. He was as fucked up as I was, which worked for me. I would have no problem convincing him to join in on a little three-way fun with Haley and me.
“Let’s go back to our room for a bit. Haley’s got some high grade coke that she only wants to share with us.”
He struggled to focus while looking at me.
“I dunno, Marls. I’m pretty fucked up already.”
“That’s coz of that pill, but once you come down off it, you’re gonna crash. The stuff she’s got will keep us going for the rest of the night, and we don’t wanna miss out.”
He looked around the room, raking his hand through his hair, obviously debating with himself on what to do. “Your sister never gets to hear about this, never. You hear me?”
“Of course not. I’m not fucking stupid, dude. What happens on tour stays on tour.”
We did our ‘boys in the hood’ type handshake and started to leave the suite, heading to our room. As we got to the door, Haley was there with Rocco. I gave her a ‘what the fuck is he doing here?’ look, and he saw it.
“Don’t worry, dude, she’s all yours. I just want a line of the high grade, and maybe watch what unfolds. Maybe even take a few photos for posterity. You’ve seen the videos; you know how Haley likes to perform.”
Fuck yeah I did. Rocco’s videos had been our wanking material since the tour started, but the latest one of him and Haley with another girl had been the best. For some perverse reason, the thought of him watching what might happen, and even filming it, turned me on big time, but I knew Maca wouldn’t be happy.
“Listen, you can’t let Maca know you’re taking photos. He will flip if he thinks that there’s any way Georgia will find out,” I told him.
“No problem, man. By the time Haley gets him worked up nice and good, he won’t even remember you have a sister. And any thoughts he might be having about quitting the band will be gone for good.”
I would like to be able to tell you that at that moment, I had some doubts about what we were about to do, that I felt some kind of guilt or compassion towards my sister, but I didn’t.
My drug-fucked brain totally believed that I was doing G and Maca a huge favour. He would realise how much he would be missing out on if he married George anytime soon and end things. Yeah, she’d be a bit upset, but she’d throw herself into her school work, pass her exams, and get a good job. Then perhaps in a few years, when we’d made it, maybe then they could get back together and think about marriage and kids. Everybody could then live happily ever after. In my head, it all sounded easy, and so fucking perfect.
“You go back with her first and get her warmed up. I’ll walk back with him in a while, and he won’t know what’s hit him once he sees her in action.”
My dick twitched at the thought. I grabbed Haley’s hand and dragged her out of the room and along the corridor to ours.
As soon as we were inside, she pulled her T-shirt over her head. She turned and faced me, naked, except for the little waterproof tube that hung around her neck between her tits; the same kind that Rocco had earlier. Hers was pink and a bit bigger than the yellow one he had though. I watched her while I leaned back against the door.
“Nice room, Marley, you’ve done well. Just think how much better things are gonna get. You’ll probably be headlining your next tour, not supporting.” She opened her legs and put her hands on her hips, adding, “If you’re still together, that is.”
“Oh? And why wouldn’t we still be together?” I asked her.
“Well, from what I hear, Maca’s thinking of giving it all up coz your stuck-up little sister don’t approve of the rock and roll way of life.” She licked her lips when she finished talking. I don’t know if she thought it was a sexy move, and I really didn’t give a shit. She was naked, with holes that need filling, and that’s all I was concerned about.
“Well, we’d better put on a show that convinces him that the rock and roll way of life is exactly what he wants, even if my sister doesn’t.”
I walked toward her and kissed her hard on the mouth. I’d fucked Haley before, a couple of years ago, after we played for someone from schools sixteenth. It was hard, fast, and pretty uneventful, but this time, we we’re in a hotel room and not up against a van in a pub car park. I’d planned to give her a time she wouldn’t forget.
With all the sex I’d been getting before, and especially after the tour had started, I’d learnt a few moves, and I’d planned on trying every one of them out on Haley White. Every. Single. One.
At the end of one of the two double beds was a two-seater sofa, and in front of that was a long, wooden coffee table.
“Take that off from around your neck and lay on the coffee table, legs facing the door,” I ordered her.
Her eyes flicked over me from head to toe, and then up and over my face as she thought about my instructions.
She swiped the magazines off the table and lied down on it. She was short, around five feet, two at the most. If she hadn’t worn so much make-up, I would go as far as saying that Haley was a pretty girl: blonde hair, blue eyes, curvy little body. She had a nice arse and a great pair of tits too. It was a shame, really, that she was such a little slut. I could’ve quite fancied her if it wasn’t for that. Don’t get me wrong, I have no issue with girls that like sex, none at all. What I do have an issue with are girls that use sex, or their sexuality, to manipulate and get what they want. Perhaps I’m a hypocrite, I don’t know, but they’re just my thoughts.
Haley bended her legs and put her feet on the edge of the table. Unhooking the pink plastic tube from around her neck, she held it out to me and as I took it in my hand, it gave me an idea.
“Open,” I told her. She opened her mouth and I slid the pink plastic capsule inside.
“Suck,” I ordered.
Haley deep throated it like a pro while I took off my shorts and started to stroke my cock. I pulled the tube out of her mouth with a pop and she turned, trying to get her face level with my dick.
“Not yet. Let’s give you some fun first.”
I knelt at the end of the table and swiped the pink plastic through her cunt, then pushed it inside of her. It was about seven or eight inches long, and about as thick as three fingers, so even a bucket crutch like Haley should be able to feel it.
“Fuck, Marley. That feels good.”
Yeah, she felt it.
&nb
sp; Just as I started to work my thumb over her clit while fucking her with the plastic tube, the door opened.
I turned to watch as Rocco and Maca came to a stop, just inside the room. Rocco smiled as Maca raked his hand through his hair, his eyes all over Haley’s naked body.
The self-closing door shut with a click behind them and Maca jumped.
“Shit,” he said, very quietly.
“Carry on, children, don’t mind me.” Rocco said before moving over to one of the beds. He sat with his back against the headboard, in a prime position to watch whatever was about to unfold.
Haley sat up and faced Maca. Her legs were wide open and straddling the coffee table. She pulled the capsule out of her cunt and stood to go towards Maca. Dropping to her knees in front of him, she sucked the capsule into her mouth and started to work it in and out, while stroking Maca’s obviously hard cock through his shorts.
“Want me to suck your dick, just like I suck this?” She asked him.
He looked at me, then back down to Haley.
“I-I don’t...” He laced his fingers together and pressed them to the top of his head. Closing his eyes, he swayed gently and swallowed hard.
That moment right there is when I should’ve shut things down.
He was young and horny, yet he was also unfocused, swaying on his feet, pumped full of drugs. But despite all that, he knew where his heart laid. He knew he loved Georgia, his English Rose, and as the song said, ‘No bonds could ever tempt him from she.’
And I shit all over that. I took what they had, what he felt for my sister, and kicked it right in the gut. I kicked until it couldn’t breathe―until their love was a crumpled heap on the floor, gasping its last, dying breaths.
All I cared about was the band staying together and making it big. What Sean and Georgia had going on was inconsequential to me ... irrelevant. There were plenty of willing women out there, so why get stuck with just one?