“Nope.”
“Want an extra shift?”
The UCSD student scrunched up his face. “Friday night…but I need the money…okay, sure.”
“Great.”
Problem solved. He liked solving problems.
Then he cast another baleful glance toward the table where Hayden was on a date with Will.
They were gone.
His head jerked back. He hadn’t seen them leave. They’d better be going straight the fuck back to her place, where Will would drop her off and she would tell him she never wanted to see him again.
Christ. Adrenaline surged through his veins, the urge to follow them and make sure that happened making him edgy. What the hell was wrong with him?
Calm the fuck down. He was seeing her tomorrow night. She’d basically admitted she wasn’t attracted to Willy boy, so he had nothing to worry about.
What he should be worried about was why he was so worried.
—
He arrived at Hayden’s condo the next evening to pick her up. She answered the door, her face tight, her eyes wary. “Hi.”
“Hi, gorgeous.” He bent and kissed her cheek. Friendly but not too much. “All set?”
“I’m not sure. I’m a little worried about what we’re going to be doing.”
“Heh. Really?”
She gave his chest a little swat. “Really. I don’t like not knowing what’s happening.”
He’d called her earlier and told her to wear a swimsuit, with maybe a T-shirt over it that she wasn’t afraid to get wet, but he didn’t tell her what they were doing.
“I’m not athletic,” she informed him. Yeah, he’d seen her trying to shoot basketball hoops. “If you’ve got something crazy planned for us, I might as well tell you right now I probably can’t do it.”
“It’s not crazy.” He’d given lots of thought to this. She needed to have fun, but he already knew her idea of fun and his might not be the same. She liked looking through a microscope. He liked jumping out of planes. Those were slightly different.
But surely there was some way he could gradually get her to try some new things. Maybe she’d never want to jump out of planes—although he’d be happy to do a tandem jump with her, as he did on a regular basis to raise money for the foundation. It’d be crazy fun to introduce her to skydiving. But short of that, there were many things he could introduce her to. And he wasn’t even thinking sexually.
Okay, he was, but that was for later.
“We’re going night paddleboarding,” he informed her.
She tilted her head. “Really?”
“Yeah. Down at Mission Bay. I haven’t done it, but apparently it’s pretty cool. Have you ever tried stand-up paddling?”
“Actually, I have.” She made a face. “Carrie and I took a lesson and tried it a few times. I’m not going to claim to be good at it, but even a couple of klutzes like us managed to do it.”
“Klutz. You’re so cute.”
“You haven’t seen me trying to play volleyball,” she muttered. “So we’re going to do it in the dark?”
“I certainly hope so. Although with the lights on is good too.”
Her eyes widened and then she burst out laughing. “I meant paddleboarding!”
He grinned. “Oh right. Yeah, we’re going to do it in the dark. Actually, the sun will go down while we’re on the water. Let’s get going.”
They drove down to Mission Bay and he found a lot to park in. They walked to the sports center where you could rent kayaks, SUPs, and sailboats.
“Hi, Beck,” one of the owners of the center greeted him. “How are you?”
“Great, thanks. Keaton, this is Hayden.”
“Nice to meet you, Hayden. So you two are joining the night SUP tour?”
“Yeah.”
“Nice night for it. No wind.” Keaton nodded. “Let’s get you set up.”
Beck had done stand-up paddleboarding numerous times and it was fun, although not exactly the extreme kind of sport he loved. But doing it at night made it kind of different.
“So these boards have lights on them?” Hayden asked as they carried them down to the water.
“Yeah. Cool, huh? High intensity, waterproof LED lights.”
“It is cool.”
They joined the group gathering for the tour and were soon all floating along the surface of the water. He watched Hayden carefully move from her knees to her feet, wobbling a little as she got her balance. She tentatively dipped her paddle into the water and stroked, and wobbled a bit more.
“Keep your paddle straight up and down,” he told her, noticing that she’d angled it out.
“Right, right.”
“There you go.”
She flashed him a smile as they moved along behind the others. The sun was now low in the sky, turning the wispy clouds orange and gold. The water flowed silvery blue around them.
They listened to the guide point out various landmarks and talk about Mission Bay. Probably many of the people in the group were visitors. That was okay. He and Hayden stayed together, bringing up the rear of the group.
“Doing okay?” he asked.
“Yes.” Her smile beamed. “This is gorgeous.”
“Just wait.”
The sky turned a fierier orange, silhouetting palm trees in black. Skyscrapers downtown glittered against the darkening sky, and the water reflected the golden glow of other city lights around the edge of the bay.
“That’s amazing.” Hayden gave leisurely strokes with her paddle, her head turning from one side to another to take in the views. “Carrie would love this. She’d want to take pictures.”
“It is amazing.”
The lights on the boards became brighter as the sun disappeared, all different colors, lighting up circles around the boards about forty feet in circumference.
“It feels incredible,” Hayden said, looking around. “Like we’re standing on light. It feels really…intimate.”
“Yeah.”
That was a good description. With darkness just beyond the colored glow of their boards there was a sense of being alone on top of the water, even though they were with others, and the voices carried over the calm water.
“It’s so peaceful,” Hayden added. She looked over at him. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
It was peaceful. Intimate. Even romantic.
“It’d be better if I was over there on that board with you.”
She gave a low laugh and another paddle. “Tandem paddleboarding? Not sure if that would work.”
“It can totally work. But I was thinking you’d be lying on the board. On your back. And I’d be inside you.”
Her board wobbled. “And we’d be in the water.”
He gave a low laugh and stroked his paddle harder through the water. He moved ahead of her and turned it so he faced her.
“Show-off.”
He grinned.
“Don’t get too close. Seriously. My balance is a precarious thing. Also I’m not great at steering.”
“I won’t dump you in the bay.”
He continued to paddle lazy circles around her, watching her face in the soft glow, the muscles in her slender arms flexing as she paddled.
“I have a feeling my abs will be sore tomorrow,” she commented.
“Yeah, it’s a good core workout.”
“Do you surf? Like, real surfing on waves?”
“Sure. You?”
“I’ve done it. When I was a kid, my parents tried to expose me to a lot of different things. But I was just a little nerd, not a cool surfer dudette.”
“How about mountain biking?”
“I can ride a bike.”
“Rock climbing?”
“Uh, no.”
“You might be good at that.”
“Sure, if I wasn’t afraid of heights.”
“I’m afraid of heights too.” Jesus. He’d never admitted that to anyone except Marco and Cade.
“You are? B
ut you still rock climb?”
“I had to. It was part of our training.”
“That would be pretty hard if you were afraid.”
“A lot of things in SEAL training are hard. Jesus.” He shook his head at the memories. “There were times I thought I couldn’t go on. Couldn’t take one more step. Swim one more stroke. Somehow I always found it in me to keep going. There was no fucking way I was going to give up.”
“Why?” Her soft question floated in the night air. “Why was it so important to you?”
He wasn’t sure if he could even explain it. “I just had to do it. I had to prove I could.” His parents had never thought he was worth loving, never thought he was good for anything. But succeeding as a SEAL hadn’t been about showing them he was worth something. It had been about showing himself.
“That’s our SEAL motto,” he continued. “The person who will not be defeated cannot be defeated.”
Their eyes met across the water, their boards shifting gently on the waves. Hayden’s eyes were big shadows in her face, her mouth soft. “That’s pretty powerful. And impressive.”
He lifted one shoulder. “It’s really more about mental toughness than physical toughness, although no question we were superbly conditioned. I was terrified. I remember my first parachute jump—”
“Jesus Christ.”
His lips quirked. “Yeah. And the first one was easier than later, when we jumped at thirty-five thousand feet, on oxygen, carrying over a hundred pounds of gear, free-falling nearly all the way down to avoid detection. Anyway, even that first jump, I thought I was going to puke. They had to shove me out of the plane. I hated it at first, but quitting wasn’t an option, and after a while, I got to love it.”
“And the rock climbing?”
“Yeah, that too.” He shot her a rueful smile. “Again, it was about the mental focus. Focusing on the few feet right around you. Kind of like this light bubble from our boards, though it’s bigger. If you look all the way up, or all the way down, it can freak you out, so you just focus on the next foothold or handhold, and let go of the things you can’t control.”
Hayden was silent, paddling slowly.
“Okay there?”
She turned her head to look at him, and even that distance apart, her face wore an expression that made his chest ache. “That says a lot about you.”
Chapter 11
Hayden was glad she had to focus on paddling and keeping her balance, because Beck was really throwing her off balance.
The more he revealed about himself, the more she realized how wrong her first impressions of him had been. And the more he humbled her.
She knew Navy SEALs did amazing, important things. But imagining Beck loaded with gear jumping out of a plane…wow. That was impressive enough, but to admit he’d been terrified? That took incredible guts. He’d probably done a lot of practice jumps—had he also parachuted into combat zones? She didn’t know much about their missions. She should. She’d grown up in San Diego, home to Naval Amphibious Base Coronado. But she’d lived in her own bubble. She’d had her own interests; then she’d lost her family, and had developed her own mission, something entirely different from the missions SEALs went on.
“Tell me more,” she said.
“I don’t usually talk much about that stuff.”
“Why not? Do you have bad memories?”
He didn’t answer right away. “Sure, there are some things that are not fun to remember. So I don’t. I have a lot of great memories too, though. Cade and Marco and I met in the Navy. They’re like my brothers.” He paused and his silence made her even more curious. “Met lots of other great guys too. And we accomplished some good things. That’s what I want to remember.”
“Then tell me about those things.”
Beck gestured at the tour guide, who was directing everyone back to shore. “Not now. Maybe sometime.”
Hayden was sad their tour was ending. It had been a magical experience, floating over illuminated water, surrounded by dark, the colorful glows of the other boards nearby, and the distant lights of the city glimmering over the water of the bay. And listening to Beck and getting to know him better…she wanted more of that.
As they neared shore, she tried to remember what she’d been taught. Don’t run the board right onto the sand, so as not to scratch it or damage the lights. Get off in deep enough water so that the fin doesn’t hit the bottom. But as her board slowed, she began to wobble. “Damn,” she muttered.
“Kneel down!” Beck called to her.
Right. That’s what she was supposed to do. That’s what she’d forgotten. These thoughts flashed through her mind as she toppled into the cold water. The leash attached to her ankle yanked and she surfaced, sputtering. “Shit!”
Beck was already right there beside her, reaching for her. “You okay, babe?”
“Yes.” She was annoyed with herself and embarrassed. “I’m fine. Just wet.” She gave him a glum smile as water dripped down her face.
He grinned back at her. “Yes, you are. But still damn cute.”
“Ugh.”
“No worries. I’ve got towels in my car.”
“Good.”
They carried their boards in, removed their life jackets, then headed toward the parking lot. Hayden started to shiver. Now that the sun was down, the air was cooling off.
Beck opened the trunk and pulled out two thick towels. He shook one and wrapped her up in it, pulling her against his body.
“I’ll get you wet too,” she protested, setting her hands on his chest.
“I can handle a little water. Navy SEAL, remember?”
As if she could forget. “Were you afraid of the water too?”
“Nah. I was a good swimmer. I played water polo in high school, and diving was fun for me. Some guys freaked out about that, but I was okay with it.”
He rubbed the towel over her and she studied his face in the light of a streetlamp. “I think you’re kind of amazing.”
His hands stilled on her upper arms. Their eyes met. Tension crackled. Her insides trembled, and not just from the cold. “Yeah?” His voice was low and husky. “Well, that’s cool, because I think you’re kinda amazing too.”
She blinked at him, heat spreading through her from his touch and from his words. “Really?”
“Really. I’ve never met anyone who’s working on a cure for cancer.”
Their gazes held, locked. She shivered.
“You’re freezing.” He rubbed her again. “Let’s get you home and warmed up. I know just the way to do that.”
Oh dear Lord, she hoped that meant what she thought it meant.
She sat in the passenger seat, wrapped in a towel. “I hope I’m not ruining your leather seat,” she muttered.
“It’ll be fine.”
It was a short drive back to her place. As they drove down Grand Avenue, Beck waved at a side street. “I live down there.”
“Really? That’s not far.”
“I know. We’re practically neighbors.”
Soon they were in her condo.
“What you need is a nice hot shower,” Beck said.
“That does sound good.” Uncertainty had her nibbling her lip. Beck suffered from none of that though, leading the way to her bathroom and cranking on the water. She trailed along behind him, clutching the damp towel around her, still shivering; only it wasn’t just from cold, but from nervous excitement as well.
Beck turned to her with a wicked smile on his lips. “Okay, let’s get you out of those wet things.” His smile widened. “I’ve always wanted to say that to a girl.”
She shook her head as he discarded the towels then pulled her big T-shirt over her head. She glanced down at her modest bathing-suit top.
“Nice,” Beck drawled, tracing a finger along the edge. “Let’s see you in a bikini.”
He dragged off her shorts, leaving her in her black swimsuit. “It’s not exactly a bikini,” she told him.
“Sure it is.” His han
ds spanned her bare waist as he studied her. “Sexy.” His hands slid around and down to cup her behind. “Very sexy. We should go to the beach sometime.”
“We did that last weekend. And tonight.”
“I mean, go to the beach so you can lie on a towel and I can rub sunscreen all over your hot little body.”
Heat flooded her cheeks and her pussy did a happy quiver.
Steam filled the small room and Beck turned her to unfasten her top. Then it was gone; he whisked her bottoms down and off, and he nudged her toward the bathtub. She stepped in and turned to pull the shower curtain, but Beck pulling his own T-shirt off over his head drew her attention. He met her eyes as he stepped out of his board shorts, holding her gaze in a heated connection. Okay. Apparently he was planning to join her.
He stepped in with her, beautifully naked—oh my God—he was all sleek skin, sexy tattoos, and hard muscle. Hot water pelted down on her back and she moved to make room for him. He occupied a substantial part of the small space with his height and all his muscles. He yanked the curtain shut, enclosing them in a steamy, warm cocoon, and then stepped closer.
The water poured down over both of them. He reached for the hair tie that held her ponytail and slowly drew it off, then filtered his big hands through her wet hair, getting it even wetter in the spray. She wanted to do the same to him, but contented herself at that moment with setting her hands flat on his chest and gazing up at him as sensations slid from her scalp down her spine and pooled between her legs.
“Is this shampoo?” He reached for a bottle on the built-in shelf.
“Yes.”
“Turn around.” He shifted them both so she faced away from him and his back was to the water, then began to shampoo her hair with slow, lush movements of his hands.
She’d never appreciated how erotic shampooing her hair could be.
Washing hair and body was a task that had to be accomplished as quickly and efficiently as possible in the shower each morning. But this…this was seductive. Her body warmed from the water and from Beck’s touch as he rinsed her hair, used conditioner, then moved on to washing her body with the body wash. “Smells nice,” he said. “Like you.”
“It’s nothing fancy. Just drugstore stuff.”
“What’s your favorite fragrance?”
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