by Sammy Sutton
Antonio turned to her and ran his fingers through his already disheveled hair. "I can't get it right! Never before in my life have I had to work so hard to convince myself of the validity of a project I am involved in.
Looking around at the mess, he shook his head. "Let's get out of here." He walked over and took her hand, leading her downstairs to the sofa in the great room. They sat with Amanda’s back against Antonio’s chest, and her legs stretched out between his. He wrapped his arms around her.
“Amanda, be honest with me. Where do you believe my struggles originate?”
“The struggle has to do with credibility. In this case, you have to ascertain King Solomon’s credibility. You, Antonio, have to believe he was, and still is, credible enough to justify the instructions within the Scrolls, as well as the validity of the ‘13’.
Without credibility, they are just artifacts. They are awesome, but still just artifacts.” She tried to explain, not to preach.
Antonio gave her a squeeze and kissed the top of her head. “How is it you understand?”
“I desperately wrestled with this early on, especially in college. My personality would not allow me to get beyond the duality of opinions. I was a rebel deeply disturbed by the systematic use of facts.
In my psychology classes, we had facts. Then, I would go to my philosophy or anthropology classes and their facts would defy facts of the other classes.
Now, if I am to believe a fact as an unwavering truth, whose fact am I to believe or accept? Despite my love for knowledge, I had to conform to get a degree in Psychology, and again, several years later for a Masters Degree in Social Work.
Nevertheless, I am a lifetime student without all the letters behind my name. It would be hard to convey the depths at which this holds true for me.” She waited for a sign that she should continue.
“Amanda, I’ve dedicated my whole life, and sacrificed more than I care to discuss to a discipline that I now doubt and question. If I act upon Solomon’s Scrolls, I stand to become the laughing stock of my profession, where I’ve gained a great deal of respect.
At the same time, you’re right, I’ve become sick to my stomach thinking about leading students down either a road made too narrow or some false path. I know that’s why I don’t want to go back to the classroom anymore.
I began questioning some of the validity when the system demanded insignificant specialization. It was the same as taking a pair of scissors and clipping away the interconnectedness.
I saw the small gain, but the magnitude of loss has become monumental, chaotic. Worst of all, specialization has created a political atmosphere where it doesn’t belong. We criticize and admonish those that speak out of their discipline.
I, myself, am part of the last group of anthropologists before they instituted stringent specializations within the discipline.
Amanda, what do I do? I feel damned either way.” His trust in her grew stronger. He respected her opinion.
“I am unable to answer that for you, Antonio, but I may be able to help you decide. I do not know myself. I have studied King Solomon, and lean towards his credibility, but if I had to make your decision, I would need a lot more information.”
Antonio interrupted, “I’m glad you said that. It was honest.” He felt the need to comment on her admission. She continued with his support.
“There are several groups and professions that have learned to deal with the duality. Within these groups, there is also exploitation, but that is not important in this particular instance.
I remember you told me that you came from a family of attorneys. I assume that makes you more than casually familiar with the courtroom.” She looked up at him for affirmation. He nodded, reluctantly.
“The legal system, despite all its faults, gives rise to a specific type of evidence coined as ‘plausible.’ Without going into the details you already understand, I say, give King Solomon his day in court.
You must give him the same rights as anyone else on trial...plausible evidence. Based on facts and plausibility, you decide.” She rested her case.
Antonio took hold of her arm and flipped her over onto him. Facing her, he felt flutters in his abdomen and looked deeply into her eyes. He felt closer to her at that moment, than he’d ever felt with another woman.
“You’re incredible.” He gave her a sweet, loving kiss and asked, “What courtroom should we try King Solomon in? How about taking it to my father’s?” he laughed.
She did not.
“Amanda, I was joking. Sometimes you get to me. I have to do something to switch gears before I become mush or something worse.”
She intended to make a dual point here. “No, Antonio, this time you are Judge and Jury, not your father. I will gather the evidence, not that I have to be the exclusive source of evidence. Nevertheless, I will take on that task. I will not, without making a deal of course. I’m sure a true Taurus will appreciate that.”
“I won’t argue with the need for a deal. Make your case.” She made life fun, he thought.
“I have my own soapbox, you see. I hate dirty Judges or a ‘Judge with an agenda’. In light of this, I have to be sure I am presenting the evidence to a fair Judge. Do you agree I should be afforded the privilege of a fair Judge?” She played, but it was no joke.
Antonio had to think on this for a moment.
“I’m going to plead the fifth until I’m presented with the gentle lady’s plan of how to determine the Judge’s fairness.” He raised his eyebrow, and dared her to give an answer.
“Your honor, if it pleases the court despite the conflict of interest involved, the gentle lady would like Your Honor to take a soulful journey.”
“The gentle lady better approach the bench and explain her proposal of a soulful journey. The bench reserves the right to inject a point at this time. The Honorable Judge presiding over this case does have knowledge of one particular soulful journey he would be delighted to take, anytime, and at this point, anyplace with the gentle lady.”
“I think it would be in the Court’s best interest to go ahead and agree without much further exploration. I believe the journey that the gentle lady has in mind, meets the end.
In other words, the Judge’s reference to said soulful journey is but one component of the gentle lady’s version. In fact, Your Honor, it is an important component. Again, the gentle lady rests her case.” She gave Antonio a seductive smile.
“In consideration of the gentle lady’s explanation, the court is going to allow some leeway. The request… shall be granted. Court adjourned.”
Amanda smiled at him, “Thank you…by the way, at the risk of sounding lewd, you are the first Judge that I have ever found desirable. It is hard to articulate in front of a Judge who gives your heart such palpitations.”
“Sorry, I don’t feel too sorry for you. I would think from the position you are in, you have hard evidence against you as proof of the gentle lady’s power upon the Judge.”
“I am not too sure, but I think the gentle lady likes that a lot. That is, if you were curious.” She gave him a kiss on the forehead.
He squeezed her tightly.
***
Antonio’s phone rang.
“José...Listen, I am going to send you an encrypted email. I need you to put a copy of it somewhere safe and get it off your computer, immediately...No, I’m not in trouble.
“Listen. Do not even think about telling Pop.
No, but it would create a security issue.
José just read it and put it somewhere safe. You call me, but careful what you say...Yes, if something were to happen, you have to make sure she’s somewhere safe.
José, you have to promise you’d act quickly to secure her before me.
José, I’m serious. Read it so you know what I’m talking about. Call me back when you’re able to talk alone.
José, where are you? Did you say a dress for her fiesta de quince?
Wow, she’ll be fifteen… Of course, her uncle would love
to, but Pop will be there. You know I can’t do that...José, you know I care a lot about my beautiful niece.
Pop needs to apologize to me, José. If Pop will apologize, I’ll bring Amanda. We’d be on a plane tomorrow and arrive as the happiest guests at her fiesta de quince. I’d dance two dances with her.
Give her my love...Carmen, too...Goodbye.”
The thought of missing his niece’s fiesta de quince disturbed him. He went to Amanda.
“I decided to send José an encrypted email about King Solomon’s Scrolls. He’ll lock it up as evidence, in the event that we have a security problem. He’ll call back once he reads it.” Antonio wanted her to know it was a safety precaution.
“That was a smart move. There’s something else...tell me.” She was concerned.
“Do you know what a fiesta de quince is?”
“I do. It is a debutant ball for fifteen-year-old girls?” She hoped she was right.
“I’m impressed. My niece’s fiesta de quince is coming soon. I hate missing it. I hate it.” He needed her to understand.
“Why are you not on a plane flying there now?”
“Pop will be there.”
“And…?”
“I told you, Pop and I have been estranged for fifteen years now.”
“Why, Antonio? You failed to tell me why?”
“According to Pop, anthropologists are free-loving hippies that run around the world, playing in the dirt and having sex in every sand dune.”
“Sounds like fun! What else?” She was amused, there had to be more.
“What do you mean what else? He gave me two choices: Finance or Law. That’s what the Dominguez family does, except for Antonio.”
“Sorry, I don’t feel sorry for you, unless you have tried to talk with him during the past fifteen years.”
“Amanda, he needs to apologize to me.”
“I agree, but he didn’t. God forbid you be a bigger man than your father.” Her voice lacked the sympathy he expected from her.
“I don’t want to talk about this,” he told her.
“Okay, well let me tell you a story..."
"My Dad is, and always has been the pillar I lean on. Even today, I can go see him, and I tell him anything and everything. He listens to me, and he has, over the years, exerted a quiet influence of positive respect in all of my writing. He does not agree with me all the time, yet, I find if I listen to him, I see a richer vein of connectivity within my subjects.
I had never met a man that was able to stand next to my father in a room and hold a candle to him, until I met you. Don’t go Freud on me. He is honestly that kind of man.
My Dad is sick now, and unable to talk very well. Through the years, he has said some things I didn’t really like. But right now, I would be happy to hear him repeat any of them without struggling through the disease.
Answer one question, Antonio. Do you love your father?” Her entire face began to streak from tears.
“Yes, I love my father. Look, I’m sorry. I didn’t know about your Dad.” He felt bad for her.
She let him have it. “Damn, Antonio. I would hate to think I said something I didn’t mean to my sons. Furthermore, I’m afraid I might say something I don’t mean to you. Then what? I’m history?”
“Amanda, don’t be ridiculous.” He thought she’d gone ballistic.
“By the way, did you say the fiesta de quince was for your niece, or for you and your father? Now, she’s being punished because Grandpa, fifteen years ago, about the time she was born, didn’t like Uncle Antonio’s career choice.” She paused, and started again.
“Here is the part that would have me laughing myself silly, if it wasn’t so sad. You’ve kicked your Pop’s opinion back in his face. You’re likely the most successful anthropologist in the country, if not the world. You’ve proved your point, a thousand times over, and neither one of your sorry asses know it.”
She took a breath, calmed her voice, and added, “Antonio, you are incredible, but this eats you alive. I have known you a very short time and not one second passes that it’s not tearing at you.
Be truthful, at least with yourself. You are crazy about the man. He is the one person in this world you want to impress. Even with me, you have no desire to flaunt your success. In fact, it’s almost the opposite, and I love that about you. But you did, and still do, want your father to know and be proud of you.”
Antonio had no idea what to do, or say. She was right about all of it. It was an unnecessary Demon. He still didn’t believe he could make things right with Pop.
“Amanda, I don’t know what to say, except that you’re right. But, I don’t know if I’m man enough to fix it.” He turned to exit the room, and instead paused. “I’ll tell you the crazy thing. Since you came into my life, I’ve thought, Pop would love her.” His eyes filled with moisture as he turned again to exit. Amanda stopped him.
“Antonio, do you know what I think? Your Pop didn’t want you to be an anthropologist because it meant you had to leave him, and he had trouble bearing the pain, something I may help you understand another day. If you became an attorney, or a financial guru you would have never abandoned Miami.
I thought you should look at another side of it. I am sorry I went overboard.” She felt guilty now, not from what she said, but how she said it. This time, Amanda turned and left.
Antonio made his way to the bathroom. He wanted to throw up. He removed his glasses and splashed cold water in his face. He wondered. Is this part of a ‘soul’s journey’? He would rather be beaten-up by a professional fighter.
What if Pop was scared Antonio would leave? Damn, it actually made sense. A lot more sense than what he had believed all these years. He dried his face and put his glasses back on.
***
After shopping for a fiesta de quince dress with his wife and daughter, José decided he should go by the office and take care of Antonio’s email.
He was surprised that he remembered how to open the encrypted file. He printed it, copied it to a jump drive, and erased it from the hard drive. He didn’t want to take any unnecessary risk, even though he didn’t know what he was protecting.
He finished the operations on the computer, and settled to read it. As soon as he read it, he knew he had to tell Pop. He took the jump drive, and one copy. Putting each of them in different secured lockboxes that they kept at the office for sensitive evidence, he then put another copy in his coat pocket, and took off to see Pop.
When he got to his parent’s house, his mother came to the door.
“Mama, I need to speak to Pop about a case, it’s important.”
His father heard him and came out.
“José, what’s wrong?”
“Pop, I need to talk to you about a case - now. May we go to your office?”
“Sure, come in, Son.”
Inside his father’s office, he waited for the door to close before he spoke.
“Pop, I spoke with Antonio again this evening. He told me he was sending an encrypted email. He wanted me to have the information, and a copy, for security reasons.”
His father interrupted. “Is my Antonio in trouble?”
“No Pop, at least not in that way. Listen Pop, he made me swear not to tell you, but that was before I’d seen it. He also told me on the phone - if something went wrong, I was to get Amanda in a secure situation before I did anything else. He made me promise it, twice.”
He handed the paper to his father.
“Pop, someone would kill Antonio over this.”
His father read the copy of the email.
“After all this time, it rises again, and this time it threatens my boy.”
"What do you mean?"
His father waved away his question, and simply replied, "History repeats itself in truth or fable. Either way it ends the same, the good guys against the bad guys and the ones who hold the keys of knowledge are often sought out first for destruction."
“He did say that he and Amanda are the two
with the specific knowledge necessary. Pop, we have to make sure Antonio is protected.”
“I know, son. You don’t think I would let something happen to him, do you?”
“No.”
“You keep talking to your brother, as often as possible. Try talking him into keeping this quiet as long as possible, too. I’ll get a plan together to make sure he’s safe.”
His father said aloud, “God, you must not let anything happen to my Antonio. Guide him on this journey, and bring him home to his Mama…and to me."
Chapter 26
“Faith is taking the first step even when you can’t see the whole staircase.”
— Martin Luther King Jr.
Antonio was elated; Amanda was behaving freer, and happier with each passing hour. They studied the Scrolls, they talked, they laughed and since she shared his bed, they dreamed together. At the moment Amanda was trying extremely hard to convince him that falling out of the sky was not just for fools and bird poo. His comparison was currently the subject of her laughter.
“Now then, on a more serious note; Thanks to you I feel a tremendous sense of relief, and I haven’t even done anything but make a simple decision.” He waited for her reaction, purposefully.
“What decision? Do not tease me and make me wait.”
“I have decided, contingent on your decision to be my date, I’m going to go too little Rosie’s fiesta de quince.” He was elated with his declaration.
His decision stunned her.
“Are you sure?” She asked.
“I have never been surer of anything in my life, that is, if you would quit stalling and accept my invitation.”
“Of course, I’ll buy a new dress and shoes, too. Antonio, I am so happy for you. I know it is the right decision. But please, tell me what the clincher was.”
He gave her a quick kiss. “Everything you said. You were hard on me, Amanda. It hurt. It still hurts, but you cared.
You cared enough to keep me from pain, to cross the line and do what was right. When you said Pop had probably been afraid of me leaving - it all made sense. I thought about how I’ve been concerned, afraid of you leaving, and it hurt.