by Rachel Wells
They sat in silence for a few minutes. I suddenly wondered what the logistics of such a move would mean for me. I didn’t know where Kensington was, or how far from here. I had a horrible feeling that I wouldn’t be able to go and visit him, as it would be too far. I’d have to stay here with the people who rented this house. I loved Jonathan but I also loved Claire, and Franceska’s family, and I was growing fond of Polly and Matt. I felt terror creep up my fur. I didn’t want him to go, because what if I never saw him again? It hit me that I loved him.
‘What about Alfie?’ Jonathan asked suddenly. I wanted to pounce with joy. Philippa looked at him through narrowed eyes.
‘Cats aren’t allowed in my apartment building,’ she said, heartlessly.
‘I can’t leave him,’ Jonathan replied quietly.
‘Oh, for God’s sake. Cats get re-homed all the time. You can find him a family to go to, we’ll do an advert. He’s not even your cat in the first place!’
‘Philippa, are you completely uncaring? Alfie is my cat. I love him.’ I felt my fur warm up; he loved me, too. I hissed loudly at Philippa.
‘You bloody horrible cat,’ she screeched. ‘Did you hear how he hissed at me?’ She looked thunderous.
‘Well, you called him names,’ Jonathan replied, seriously.
‘Oh, for God’s sake, Jonathan. He came with the house, you’ve barely known him five minutes. It’s not great for your image, if I’m honest and let’s face it, he’s just a bloody cat.’
‘I’ve known him longer than I’ve been with you,’ Jonathan said quietly. ‘And when I first came back, I was in a pretty bad way; he sort of saved me.’ I felt my heart swell with pride. I saved him! He had noticed, after all.
‘He saved you?’
‘He was here for me when I felt alone.’ Jonathan looked a little bit surprised at this revelation; I basked in the glory of his acknowledgement.
‘Right, well, if you’re going to be so stupid over a dumb animal, you’re not the man I thought you were. I’m going home now, to give you time to come to your senses.’
She got up, looked murderously at Jonathan, and went upstairs to collect her things. We could hear her stomping around and slamming doors angrily, but Jonathan didn’t move, and neither did I. I curled myself up against his leg.
She emerged after a while, and stood at the door.
‘You’ll regret this. What kind of idiot man chooses a cat over me? No wonder you’re such a huge failure,’ she spat, more viciously than any cat I’d seen.
‘Bye, Philippa,’ Jonathan said, harshly, and then we watched the door shake as she left, slamming it behind her.
‘I didn’t see that coming,’ Jonathan said, after a while. ‘Goodness me. What a woman. I don’t know how she went from being a fun casual girlfriend to a psychopath.’ I wanted to say that she was never fun to me, but I couldn’t. ‘Anyway, looks like I’ve had a lucky escape and Alfie, it looks as if you’ve saved me yet again.’ I purred, proudly. I was so happy and wanted to tell Jonathan that he was very welcome. I had saved us both from the wicked witch. And the bonus was that, although he might have still been in shock a bit, he didn’t seem sad. I just hoped that he wouldn’t regret it and change his mind. But for now I had to trust him. He had earned my trust after all.
‘And the right woman is just around the corner.’
That reminded me of my plan. ‘She’s not round the corner, she’s just down the street,’ I wanted to scream. We’d got rid of Philippa, now we just needed to get rid of Joe, and get Claire and Jonathan together. How, I had no idea, but it would make me the happiest cat alive, if I could pull it off. My heart was beating with excitement at the thought that I was a step closer to my ideal goal.
I didn’t go back to Claire’s house that night; I didn’t want to leave Jonathan. He’d shown loyalty to me, and I wanted to show mine to him. After Philippa had left, we watched TV together, and then he took me back up to his room and the much-loved cashmere blanket. I had glorious dreams that night, in which I felt loved and warm and wanted. After the last few weeks, where I had felt utter turmoil and insecurity, it was much needed. It was the best cat sleep I’d had in a while.
It wasn’t a work day the next day, but I woke early and went and nudged Jonathan by sitting on his chest. He groaned, opened his eyes and gently swatted me away in surprise. I retaliated by softly pawing his nose.
‘Ow, Alfie, you startled me,’ he groaned. I smiled. I was too happy to be worried about being told off. ‘Oh God, I guess you’re hungry. OK, come on then. Give me a chance to go for a pee and I’ll fetch you some breakfast.’ I miaowed joyfully. ‘Christ, maybe I should have kept Philippa after all, she’s less trouble than you.’ I looked at him, shocked but he laughed. ‘Only joking. Right, see you downstairs in a minute.’ He dashed into his ensuite shower room and I padded downstairs to wait for my breakfast.
We didn’t rush but after we had both eaten, Jonathan announced that he was going to the gym and so I thought it was time for me to go and see Claire. I steeled myself for what I might find; who knew what Joe had got up to since I saw them last?
I let myself in and found Claire cooking a big breakfast.
‘I was wondering where you were,’ she said. ‘I was getting worried, Alfie.’ She looked so sad as I rubbed against her bare legs. I wondered why humans didn’t realise that they should change things if they were unhappy. She should have kicked Joe out, as he clearly didn’t make her full of joy. As she bent down to fuss me, I licked her nose affectionately. She giggled, which was a welcome sound in what had been a laugh-free house, lately.
Claire was in a bad way. She looked like the Claire who had moved in here; thin and pale, with dark-ringed eyes and a taut mouth.
‘Breakfast ready?’ Joe asked, appearing at the kitchen door in a pair of jogging trousers and a scruffy T-shirt.
‘Nearly, sit down and I’ll bring it in.’ She dished up one plate of food and took it into the living room, where she put it on the small dining table. He sat down and started eating without a word of thanks.
‘You not having any?’ he asked, finally noticing she was still standing there. She sat down with her mug.
‘No, just coffee. I’m not hungry.’
‘Good girl, don’t want you getting fat, do we?’ he said with a sneer, and he turned back to his food. I was constantly surprised by the way this awful man seemed to become more and more terrible every day, especially when my Claire was so lovely. His plate was piled high, and he had no manners. As egg yolk dripped down his chin, he wiped it away with his hand. Looking at Claire, I could see that she clearly couldn’t cope with his behaviour. My heart was breaking again, but I still didn’t know what to do.
A few hours later, when Claire had cleaned all the dishes, given me some fried egg (which I really liked), and tidied the house, Joe appeared from upstairs, dressed in jeans and a shirt. He looked smarter; normal almost. But of course I’d seen the real him.
‘Are you going out?’ Claire asked, her voice barely a whisper.
‘I told you, it’s Garry’s birthday and we’re going bowling and then out.’
‘Oh, sorry, I’d forgotten.’
‘Yeah, well don’t wait up.’
‘Have fun.’ Claire smiled at him but he didn’t smile back.
‘Sure. Oh, by the way, you couldn’t lend me £30? Just for a few days? Work still haven’t paid what they owe me, but they said they would definitely put it in this week.’ I knew this was a lie. Joe had been taking money from Claire for ages and not giving her anything back. I wanted to scratch and bite him but I knew that would only make things worse.
Claire went to get her purse and came back with three notes. She handed them over and Joe took them, without a glance. He pocketed them without thanks and he didn’t even kiss her goodbye as he left the house. Claire watched him go as if she didn’t understand what was happening to her, and I really don’t think she did. I was pretty sure she didn’t know how this man, who had been so charming to
her at first, was now living with her, eating her food, taking her money, and not even being nice to her. Her eyes were questioning how she had got herself into this situation; but she also looked as if she had no idea what to do.
I was despairing, as Claire went upstairs, took a shower and got dressed. I followed her to offer her my support; it wasn’t much, but it was all I had. She looked a little better when she was clean and dressed but she started cleaning rigorously and I could see her sadness.
I was so relieved when the doorbell rang and she opened the door to find Tasha on the other side. I rushed to Tasha and almost leapt into her arms, I was so pleased to see her. She’d hardly been round at all since Joe had moved in, and it made me very sad. I missed her terribly and I hoped she would know what to do about Claire.
‘I didn’t know you were coming,’ Claire said, eyeing her suspiciously.
‘Sorry, I was just passing. Can I come in?’ she asked. Claire nodded and stood aside. Something wasn’t right here. They didn’t greet each other warmly like they had done previously. ‘Is Joe here?’
‘No, he’s gone out. Coffee?’ Claire asked.
‘Yes please.’ They walked through to the kitchen, where Claire busied herself with the kettle and the cups. ‘Claire, are you OK?’ Tasha asked.
‘I’m fine, I’m great,’ she replied, defensively.
‘I haven’t seen you outside work in over a month, Claire. I thought we were friends.’ I saw Claire’s shoulders hunch.
‘We are friends, Tash, but things have been really hectic with Joe. But as I said, I’m fine.’
‘You look as if you really need to eat,’ Tasha said.
‘I’m watching my weight, that’s all.’
‘There’s nothing of you.’
‘I like being thin.’ There was a sharp edge to her voice.
‘Claire, you were like this when I first met you. Your ex-husband did that to you and then you started to get over him. Do you remember how much we laughed? And you loved work and the book group and everything.’
‘Look Tasha, I told you the other day, I’m fine. I’m trying to be happy. The only thing that’s wrong is that Joe is having this awful time with work and I need to be supportive. He needs me.’ She looked determined when she mentioned Joe.
‘But you don’t talk to me any more; you never come to the book group and refuse every invitation to come out. Then, when you come to work, you put your head down and avoid me. I have no idea why you’re shutting me out!’ Tasha seemed genuinely upset and worried. I decided to make a grand gesture; I went to her and jumped up into her arms. I wanted to convey to her that she was right and she needed to do something. I wasn’t sure if she understood, but she held me as if she did.
‘I’m not avoiding you, Tasha, you’re just being paranoid. How many times can I say that everything is fine?’ I looked at the two women; they both looked as if they were going to refuse to budge. As she gently put me back down on the floor, I crossed my paws that Tasha would make Claire see sense.
‘It’s not that we’ve even been allowed to meet Joe properly. Whenever I ask you both out, you make excuses. Is that you or him?’
‘It’s both of us. Joe isn’t in a great place because of work, I thought you understood that I needed to support him.’
‘OK, I’m going to risk you killing me, but I’m going to say it. You hardly knew Joe before he moved himself in, what was it, a month ago? He treats you like a doormat; we’ve all seen it. He might say that the work thing isn’t his fault but do you really believe him? People don’t get fired for no reason these days. If he’s as innocent as he says, then he would be taking them to a tribunal.’
‘He’s talking to HR and lawyers at the moment, you know how long these things take,’ Claire replied, although she didn’t sound convinced. ‘And he hasn’t moved in. He’s staying here because he needs my support.’
‘Are you sure? From what I can gather, you’re rushing home from work every day to see him.’
‘Actually Tasha, I am sure. He still has his flat, and anyway, I like having him here.’ She didn’t sound very convincing to me. Or to Tasha either.
‘Do you? Because you seem miserable to me. And to everyone at work. We’re worried about you. You don’t come for drinks. You never answer my texts. You look pretty bad, to be frank. So if this is your idea of happy, then God help you.’ Tasha’s voice was raised and her face was red. I wanted to shout in agreement but I just stood there, watching. Claire was lying, to Tasha and maybe to herself. There hadn’t been a conversation as far as I knew, but it was clear that Joe had, in effect, moved in.
‘Tasha, I appreciate your concern. But this is my life. After my horrible marriage I didn’t think anyone would want me. But Joe does. And not only that, he needs me. This is a tough time for him, and he needs my support. I love Joe and we’re happy. I don’t need you or anyone else coming round and interfering.’
‘I’m only doing it because I care about you. You do know that, don’t you? I’m worried.’ Tasha looked very sad and defeated all of a sudden.
‘Please don’t worry.’ Claire’s voice was colder than I’d ever heard her. ‘I’ve got a lot to do today, so I’d be grateful if you left.’ Claire turned away from Tasha, who slowly backed out of the kitchen. I saw Claire pour the untouched coffee down the sink before I followed Tasha outside. She leant against the front gate and I stood next to her.
‘Oh Alfie, why can’t she see what a user he is?’ I tilted my head. She crouched down as if to have a face-to-face conversation with me. ‘He’s bad, you know that, I can tell, but what can we do? She just won’t listen. If only you could somehow get him to show his true colours.’ I tilted my head the other way, questioningly. ‘You know, I’ve seen this before with other people. Women who change like this with men are usually being abused in some way. You must have seen more than me, Alfie, living with them. I wish you could tell me. Oh God, I’m talking to a cat.’ She laughed, bitterly. ‘No offence, Alfie, but I don’t think you or I can solve this one.’
I hated that humans underestimated me but at the moment she was right; I could think of no way to fix this. However, since I was feeling quite confident having sorted the situation with Philippa, which I felt I could take some credit for, perhaps something would come to me. I kept playing Tasha’s words in my head, ‘getting him to show his true colours’, and I prayed for some inspiration.
I returned through the cat flap to find Claire. She was sitting at the table in the living room and she looked very sad. I jumped up onto the table and gave her a quick cat kiss, licking her nose gently. She smiled sadly, and didn’t even try to get me off her table. Things must have been bad.
‘Sometimes it feels like you are the only one who doesn’t judge me,’ she said. I purred. I did actually judge her, but she needed my support. ‘Alfie, I love you but I need to go to the supermarket. Don’t worry, I’ll get you a treat for supper.’ She pulled herself up, and leaving me sitting on the table, she got ready to leave.
I saw Jonathan arrive back from the gym, so I went to check on him. I was hoping for some time at the number 22 flats later but I didn’t want to be too far from Claire; I was so worried about her. Jonathan was on the phone and when he hung up, he smiled at me.
‘I’m going out with some friends from work to celebrate my newfound freedom,’ he joked. ‘I’ll give you some salmon before I go, but I suggest you don’t wait up.’ He laughed and I miaowed along with him. He then picked me up and spun me round.
‘You know, Alfie, us humans are a funny bunch. I thought I wanted a relationship so much I was willing to put up with being bossed around by Philippa. But actually I’m happier without her. I can see that now!’ He laughed again. If only Claire could see this. He was right, he was nicer now, so much nicer than ever before, and maybe it had taken a relationship with a rotter like Philippa for him to see the special bond I knew we shared.
I remember Margaret talking about how people grow. Sometimes they grow straight,
and sometimes they take wrong turns, but humans evolve and change often. She also said that sometimes it took very bad things to make people blossom, which made little sense to me until I had my own bad things to deal with. I had been a very young cat but I’d had to grow up fast and learn hard lessons, which I hadn’t always welcomed, but which would stand me in good stead for the future. Jonathan had grown too, but my poor Claire; she was wilting. I hoped it was one of the wrong turnings that Margaret had spoken about and that she would start growing straight again.
I had to make sure that my families were all right; but it was a big responsibility for a little cat.
Joe had returned home late that night, waking both Claire and me. He was being nice to Claire in a very horrible way, pawing at her and kissing her and I left the room before they kicked me out.
I headed back to Jonathan’s for the night. I was greeted by an empty house, and, once again, Jonathan didn’t come home at all. What a bunch of humans I had chosen!
I felt like a ping pong ball as I padded back over to Claire’s for breakfast. Surprisingly, she and Joe were all smiles as they had breakfast together. Claire even ate a little bit, although it was only a very small amount. I saw Claire chewing her lip nervously.
‘Joe, can I ask you something?’ she said, sounding timid. He nodded. ‘It’s just that you’ve been here over a month now and, well, you seem to have moved in, but we haven’t talked about it.’ I saw his eyes darken.
‘Are you saying you don’t want me here?’ he asked.
‘No, of course not. But, well, we don’t talk about your job or your flat or what’s happened. Are you living with me properly?’ She looked unsure and scared.
‘Claire, I wanted to ask, but I was too worried you would say no. I was so ashamed, but I lost my flat. Work have messed me around with money and the lawyer who is helping me demanded payment up front. I couldn’t afford the rent.’ He put his head in his hands. ‘I was just too afraid to tell you.’ Claire looked as if she didn’t understand and I could see she had no grip on this situation at all.