We’re hustled into a room decorated in shades of pink and cream. Plaster of Paris winged baby angels stare down at us from the corners. Somehow, a veil’s been stuck on my head. We walk down an aisle, on worn carpet, towards a fake stained-glass window, which is backlit by what looks like a disco ball. The light from it bathes the room. My legs turn to jelly at the sight of the stranger behind the altar. He beckons us forward, and Javi almost has to carry me. I look up at him with second thoughts on my mind. Thinking maybe we should get to know each other better, but his eyes are on the preacher.
Javi slides a hundred-dollar bill across the altar. “Make it fast, padre.”
He nods. “Do you?” He looks to Javi, who says the words. Then to me. I wish I had a roofie right about now. “And you?” I nod, but they wait for the words.
“Yes…I do.” My voice sounds rusty, unused. The lengths I’m willing to go to just to get laid.
A kiss, a few more bills passed around, there’s a wedding picture. I hope I smiled in it. And then it’s done. Mrs. Javier Escobar.
* * *
Exhausted and running on fumes, I sleep most of the way to our cabin. Mine and Javi’s. Our love nest. He bought it just for me, I think with pride. Before. Before I became his. His wife! I stare at the beautiful princess-cut diamond on my finger. He’s been on the phone most of the drive. Making arrangements for the wedding feast. I’m so tired, yet I know how important this little detail is to him, so I get as much shut-eye as I can fit in.
I wish we could have just stayed in Vegas instead of driving to Big Bear tonight. I’ve never been. But Javi insisted. “The perfect ending to our wedding has to be at the cabin, Blue.”
As we continue to drive up the hill—it’s really remote, I haven’t seen another car in a while—questions fly through my mind. Where will we live? At the Chubby House? Will I still be able to work? Wait, if we live at the Chubby House, are we keeping his mom in the basement? And what am I going to do about my own mother? Ugh. I sigh.
He turns to me. “What’s got your face twisted into a frown, Bonita?”
Before I even think, I utter, “Moms. Mine and yours.” I sigh and reach for his hand in the darkness.
He sits up straighter, holding tight to the steering wheel. “I’m listening,” he says as we pull up the circular drive, but I’m distracted. “This isn’t a cabin, it’s a log mansion! Javi, it’s beautiful!” And it is. It’s set up on a hill, and as I get out I see nothing but forest around us. “No neighbors?” I ask, smiling at his mischievous grin.
“Nope, all alone. Finally, no distractions.” He grabs the bags from the back. The two we brought and the five others we bought in Vegas.
I love the idea of the love nest and tell him so.
Javi
Her words about mothers keep distracting me from the joy I should be feeling at bringing her here. Lights blaze all around the cabin. There’s a Jacuzzi out back. I can’t wait to get her into it, out of her wedding dress. I know all the food’s been delivered and set up. I got the text as we were turning on to the private drive.
I don’t have servants. I just have those who are paid very handsomely for Favors.
Why does she have to bring this up right now? I wonder, trying not to look as put out as I feel. I’ve gone to a lot of trouble to make this perfect for her. Appreciate it, dammit!
And that door in my mind continues to creak open.
Blue
He’s quiet. After my big mouth couldn’t stay shut. I had to bring up the mother issue on our wedding night! Of all nights. Talk about boner kill.
Javi
As I prepare for the feast that I’ve wanted since she gorged herself in the parking lot, the first time I saw her, I’m mindful of her discomfort. I’ve stopped talking, and it’s making her antsy. “I’m gonna tie you up, feed you, and fuck you,” I say against her lips, before plunging my tongue into her velvety mouth. Her warm body, thinner now, presses against me.
But she might as well be a stranger on the street. I recognize none of these pathetic curves beneath my hands. I’ll have to fatten her up. “Get naked,” I command and swat her dwindling ass hard as she leaves.
“Ow, Javi!” she throws over her shoulder, before heading into the spare bedroom.
I can’t wait. No one but us.
Blue
I sit and pee, staring at my new ring and chewing the nails down on the right hand. Something’s not right. He sounds like my Javi, looks like my Javi, but there’s a new steely undertone beneath his baby blues that I’ve not yet met. And that spank? Jeez. My ass still smarts from his heavy hand.
When I come out of the bathroom, I’m naked. Panties don’t count, right?
I just feel like I need a little shield, and it looks like we’re having dinner soon. There are food containers everywhere. I’ll just explain to my new husband that I don’t find it sanitary to eat in the nude.
He eyes my body up and down, never once meeting my eyes.
“Javi,” I whisper, feeling chilled to the bone despite the heat blasting from the vents. Nothing. I clear my throat and decide that playfulness is what this situation calls for. “Thought you’d like to unwrap your present,” I say through a forced grin.
He smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes.
He walks past without touching me. “In here.”
Maybe he thinks I like it rough. I follow, staring at his broad back, muscles rippling underneath his tight T-shirt.
I should be able to talk to my new husband, tell him what I’m feeling. “Javi, I’m scared.” I whisper.
Javi
Fuck. Her tiny voice, with an undertone of tears, pulls me back. I wanna say, if you’re gonna cry about it, forget it. Maybe just have regular sex for her: a fire, some wine. Have that talk about our mothers she wanted so badly on the way up here. But this boulder’s rolling downhill, and she’s right in its path. “Calm,” I say, only to myself, and force myself to relax. Enjoy this.
Blue
“What was that, Javi?” I don’t know why my teeth are chattering.
He turns back, surprised by my question. “I said come.” He smiles down at me, and I make myself believe this isn’t going to hurt.
Javi
The food trays I’ve brought in are stacked around the bed. A sumptuous king, covered in a dark-blue velvet coverlet. Weird that I chose blue, I don’t even like that color all that much.
I whisper to remind myself not to scream. “Lie down, Blue.”
She’s covering herself as she goes to the bed. I don’t want her hiding from me, but what does it matter now? I give her privacy…for the moment.
Blue
I go to the bed, mindful of my nakedness. Relieved I’ve still got my panties on. I lie back and breathe. This is Javi. I’m his Bonita. He’d never hurt me. Hell, I’d probably feel this way with any guy for my first time. That reminds me. “Javi?” I say. He’s bustling around the room, lining up trays of food.
“Hmmm,” he replies but doesn’t stop the frenetic energy. “Please be gentle with me. It’s my first time, remember?”
His back straightens, and he turns his face so I can see his beautiful profile. A curt nod and he’s back to food prep.
My stomach hurts just seeing all the food he’s got lined up for me. For some reason—stress, lack of sleep, whatever—I start to shake like a leaf, and a single tear slips from the corner of my eye. I’ve almost talked myself into getting up and getting dressed. I actually get to a sitting position, and then he’s there. With me, pulling me close, back down onto the bed.
“Why the tears, Bonita?” He kisses them away, stroking my hair, caressing my cheeks.
“I don’t know what’s happening!” I blurt and sob into his T-shirt.
“Shhhh,” he says, laying me gently back on the bed, covering my front with his body. “This always helps me. Just relax, let Javi take care of everything.”
And then his mouth is on mine. His tongue demands entry, and I give it to him, so relieved to
hear him call me Bonita. So needy for his reassurance, I’d give him anything if he’d just stay here with me, loving me, and forget the damn food.
His kisses move to my cheeks, my neck, down my front. He pulls on my nipple with his teeth, and my back arches for him. He moves to the other, teasing my nipple with the tip of his tongue. “Javi,” I sigh.
His hands run over my belly. I want him to go lower. I arch my pelvis, but his hands aren’t listening. He puts both around my waist and squeezes. “Too skinny,” he says, and I know the feeding is about to begin.
He gets up, pulling his T-shirt over his head. I want to run my fingers over his chest. Pull him to me, but the moment for intimacy has passed.
I lean on my elbows, watching him undo the heavy buckle of his belt before dropping his jeans to the floor. He moves to the table with the desserts, similar to the one I had in my room for the feeders, and turns back to me. Whipped cream can in hand.
The sight of it makes my heart beat faster, my stomach turn. I feel like I might throw up. “Javi…”
He drops the can on the bed, reaches down to kiss me, and starts removing my lacy white panties, his eyes never leaving mine. I’m scared quiet at this point. I know what Maria and that cop did to Javi with whipped cream.
He looks down at my nakedness, spreading my legs incredibly far apart. He grins and says, “Close your eyes.”
Javi
I take her in as she squeezes her eyes closed. She holds her legs open where I put them, and I don’t miss the shivering. I reach down under the bed and pull out the bag I took from the psychiatric hospital. Opening it, I move to one leg, reminding her to keep her eyes closed, and secure the restraint. Before she has time to react to the click of the fastener, I grab her other leg, slapping the restraint around her ankle.
Not until I’m tying her to the bed with hospital-grade restraints does she protest. “Javi, I don’t like this.” The muscles in her legs flex, trying to get away from me, but it’s too late. They’re good and bound.
“No!” I yell, and she freezes. Hurt-filled eyes look up at me, but that doesn’t stop me from restraining her arms.
She cries, pleads, but I say, “This is how it has to be.” I’m not swayed. Only when she’s spread-eagle on the bed do I stand over her and admire my work.
She’s trembling, broken, trying to hide where there are no shadows. Won’t meet my eyes. Yes. This is the girl I remember. She left for a while, but she’s back now. And won’t leave me again.
I take my time, checking every restraint, making sure they’re tight, that she has no slack, before heading to the table. “Open,” I say and God love her, she does, wide. I shove two Twinkies into her mouth before she can close it. Deep. Those will take her a while to work through.
The can of whipped cream is next. I spray her tits, a bikini of cream. Then spray a generous line down her stomach, over her slit, all the way back to her ass.
“I just have to eat till the cream’s all gone,” I inform her, noting her horror-filled eyes before I get to work.
Despite the circumstances we find ourselves in, I know if I can only show her how good my way can be, she’ll come around. Maybe even like it. I give her sweet breasts special attention. I’ll make her like it, then she can have a break. Then we’ll do things her way, whatever she wants. But this right here? This is just for me.
Blue
The Twinkies in my mouth are getting soggy. I can’t talk any sense into him till they’re gone, so I suck, chew, swallow, anything to get rid of them while he does the same to the cream on my body. Tears continue to fall, which makes swallowing even harder. Not to mention the panic that’s closing my throat.
The minute I heard the last click on the restraints, I knew the only way out of this mess was to eat my way out. Maybe then, when he’s force-fed me to his black heart’s desire, I can get the fuck up and run.
Javi
It’s not her naked body or her tears that make me hard. No, it’s the chewing noises that do it for me. The slurping at the trough does it for me every time. And just when she was making me hard, they stop. Fuck, the Twinkies are gone. Only sobs and begging remain. I look up from between her legs and see her mouth is empty.
“We’ll have to fix that,” I say and grab two more. She tries to fight, but all she ends up doing is annoying me. “Hold still, Blue. We can do this the hard way or the easy way. Easy way, you take what I give you without complaint. Hard—my favorite.” I grin through the cream smeared all over my face. “I give you whatever I want through this.”
I get up, reach under the bed, and hold up the plastic feeding hose. A Favor. My guy picked it up at the animal feed store. There’s a funnel attached to one end. I pick up the water on the side of the bed, looking at her to make sure she’s watching and pour it down the tube. “I like the hard way, so please, as a wedding present for me, keep fighting.”
Blue
At the sight of the tube and the black looks he’s giving me, I force myself to be still and shut the fuck up. “The easy way please.” My voice shakes. I’m scared to death, but I know the only way out of this mess is through him, so I say and do whatever I need to for the next two hours, praying all I leave here with is a stomach ache.
Methodically, he feeds me, even wiping my chin after every bite. Tears wet my hanging hair. I’ve eaten everything he’s shoveled into my mouth. My whole body aches from the position he’s got me in, but the agony in my neck is sending spasms all the way to my toes. I’ve had to hold my head up the whole time, you see, afraid if I laid it down flat on the bed, he’d continue shoveling it in till I choked to death. “Now will you let me go?” I plead, but he doesn’t hear a word I say.
Javi
The tube scared her into submission, just like I’d hoped it would. She eats everything I put in her mouth. Mashed potatoes swimming in thick gravy—I even poured the leftover congealed mess down her throat—macaroni and cheese, a full meatloaf, a family sized chicken potpie, two dozen chocolate chip cookies. Comfort food. Comfort. Something I never had. Something I want to give her. The least I can do for her will be this last bit of comfort.
Halfway through a dozen buttery biscuits, she retches. “Keep it down, Blue, or we start over.” From the scared look in her eyes, she knows I mean it. She nods, and I stand and stretch. We’ve been at this for hours, and my back’s sore from sitting. I’ll let her up soon, go back to being the sweet Javi she thought I was, just not yet.
“Is this what you did to your mother?” She sounds tired. I love the way defeat sounds coming out of her mouth. I’ll let her have that one.
I turn, trying to catch the look of dejection in her eyes, but I can’t see her eyes. They’re hidden by the glaring ceiling light. This scares me. If I continue looking for answers there, I might find some. “I know about the tricks Sasha taught you to use with the other feeders. Who do you think invented them?” Caught in the act, she stops trying to shove biscuits out of her mouth with her tongue and flashes angry eyes at me. She thought she could hide her eyes from me, but I caught her slipping.
My eyebrows raise. “Little girl Blue, are you pissed?” She looks away, trying to hide it, but the damage is done. I’ve seen it. There’s murder in her eyes. Spitfire hate drilling into me.
I push the tray away from the bed and lie down in the swill that surrounds her, pulling her rigidly restrained body as close to mine as I can. I spoon her spread-eagled form, but she won’t give an inch. This is how it always happens.
“Open,” I say, frustrated that it must come to this. She does, and I stick a hard roll between her teeth.
There will be no interruptions.
“Blue, let me tell you a bedtime story,” I whisper into her hair, before picking up a half-chewed cookie, wet with saliva and tears, and eating it. She winces. “Were you saving that for later?” I chuckle, but she won’t meet my eyes anymore. Too late. I’ve seen your true colors…a nasty shade of blue.
“You were supposed to be mine from the beginnin
g. To do with as I wanted. Mine to mold into whatever I wanted. The agreement was that you would belong to me but stay in the Chubby House. I didn’t help matters by trying to drug you and bring you here too soon. That bought me a detour trip to the nuthatch, but in the end you’re here with me, no distractions. Right where I wanted you. My Bonita, I’ve won.”
I kiss her dirty face, licking gravy and snot from the tip of her nose.
Blue
The next thing he sticks into my mouth, I’m biting off. I want the fuck up off of this bed. Fucking hard roll. He might as well have stuck a ball gag in my mouth. I listen, hoping to hear a clue as to how to get this nightmare to end.
“It was Gretchen who didn’t keep her end of the bargain. Letting you get away, then the therapy and the exercising started. Well, that’s not really what I would want, is it? Do you think I—a feeder—would want you molded into some supermodel cookie cutter? Do you? “He doesn’t yell; his voice just gets deathly quiet. “Now you’re talking about going to school miles away from me. No, my Blue, that’s never going to happen.”
My eyes grow wide, but I’m too full of roll to speak.
He continues in a deadly voice, staring at me with disgust. “All that I could maybe—just maybe—overlook. You are exactly what I want. But then you went and talked to my mother? About me? Her filling your head with lies? Don’t even try to lie, I’ve read your journal. Filled with pages and pages of ways to destroy me? Blue, how could you?” His voice breaks and tears shimmer in his eyes, like he’s the affronted party in this mess.
Blue, Light and Dark (Chubby Chasers, Inc. Series Book 2) Page 18