by PJ Fernor
“What did you do then?”
“I took her home to Alex,” Ben said. “She’s a good kid. A smart teenager. Alex always seemed… I can’t believe she never told you this.”
“Never,” I said. I looked forward and swallowed hard. “Not a word.”
Is that what you were going through, Alex? Of course teenagers push the envelope. That’s their job. You did it. I did it. Lo’s going to keep doing it, I’m sure. But you never talked to me about it? You painted this picture of you and Lo living well. Single mom. Strong and able to survive without a man. Raising your daughter…
“Hey, I know what you’re thinking,” Ben said in a soft voice.
“What’s that?”
“You’re wondering what was going through her head that night. If she was trying to find Lo. There’s a thousand things at once going on in that mind of yours.”
I turned my head. “You’re sure Lo is okay?”
“Who’s okay, Allie?” Ben asked.
I curled my lip. “I have a gun.”
“So do I.”
“I’m from the city. I’ve seen all the crimes and coverups.”
“Are you threatening me?”
“Nope,” I said. “Just stating some facts.”
Ben let out a groan and wouldn’t stop looking at me.
I looked out the window and saw a coffee shop.
The little store had been a variety of things growing up. A pizza place. A ski shop. A gift store. Another pizza place. And now it was Windsering Cafe.
“I’m getting a coffee,” I said.
I got out of the car.
I slammed the door and took two steps and paused.
Ben hurried after me.
And I stood there, like I was waiting for him.
“Allie…”
“I was the cool aunt, Ben. I saw her a handful of times each year. I brought her toys, food, and that was it. Okay? I had a life. An apartment. A job. A caseload that would make anyone in this town want to throw up.”
Ben stepped in front of me. “You’re going to be fine. So is Lo.”
“Don’t say that.”
“I have faith in you, Allie Down.”
“I’m no longer just her aunt, Ben. I’m not her mother… but I’m pretty close to it now.”
“And look what you’ve done already. Moving. Giving up that job of yours. Knowing she needed you to be here. That wasn’t done by coincidence. Allie… I have faith in you.”
If I decided to let myself cry right then and there it wouldn’t have been the first time I cried in front of Ben.
I refused to cry though.
“How’s the coffee here?” I asked.
“Really good,” Ben said.
“Good.”
Ben smiled at me. “I’ll buy you a coffee and we can sit down and go over the case of the missing cat.”
Chapter Eleven
It was the cutest, little yellow house.
It didn’t fit in with the rest of the houses on the block.
Miss Westchester’s house looked like it belonged in the middle of the woods. That it belonged in a kids story.
There were two big windows on the first floor and the second floor had a single window in the middle. A small porch with a white railing and two white posts. Flowers hanging from black chains, overgrown and reaching for the railing. The walkway was made up of even rocks that made a gentle S shape. The front yard was small with a tiny white, picket fence.
That was the theme.
Tiny and bright.
I looked at Ben. “You know, this is the kind of house a kid draws, right?”
“What?”
“Look at the house. Give a six year old a crayon and tell her to draw a house and what does she draw? A square. A triangle on top. Chimney sticking out the side. Then one window up top, two on the bottom. This is…”
“This is Miss Westchester giving the county the middle finger,” Ben said.
“Oh?”
“Look up and down the street, Allie,” Ben said. “There was a revitalization a few years ago.”
I laughed at the way he said revitalization.
“Exactly,” Ben said. “When shit hit the fan back in oh-eight, a lot of places went belly up. A lot of houses were lost too. There were a few developments thrown together where mortgages were handed out like candy on Halloween, you know?”
“Yeah, I get it,” I said.
“There was a lot of crime popping up too in the years that followed,” Ben said. “Mostly bullshit stuff. Squatters. Parties. A few people messed up on meth and whatnot breaking in to steal the pipes and the wires.”
“The wires?”
“Copper,” Ben said.
“But wires? What if the house…”
“Still had the electricity turned on?” Ben asked with a laugh. “Have you ever met someone messed up on drugs who would take the time to rationalize their next move?”
“Good point,” I said. “I’m just trying to imagine this area…”
“Right,” Ben said. “You’re used to developers slithering through the city. Happens here too. All the time. The point I’m making is that when things started to turn, the development was cleaned up. And then someone had the bright idea to drop some shopping centers around here. And clean up the street. Some houses were flipped. Some were knocked down. But Miss Westchester, she stood her ground. I heard she was offered half a million for this place and she told the guy to stuff it up his fancy suit butt.”
“I like her already,” I said.
We walked up the porch steps.
The wood felt spongey.
I was willing to bet the rest of the house was the same.
Again… time… years… the inevitable knowing there will always be an end…
Ben took the lead and pounded his fist against the chocolate brown door.
I pointed to the doorbell and Ben shook his head at me.
Of course it doesn’t work.
We waited a good minute before I heard shuffling on the other side of the door.
It slowly opened and there stood a woman who looked about four-feet tall. She had glasses that took up most of her face. When she saw Ben, she smiled, showing off a toothless smile. She instantly reached for him, all of her fingers bent, her knuckles misshapen.
Arthritis.
She was hunched forward and Ben gently pushed the door open and reached for a cane that was able to stand on its own.
“You need to use this,” Ben said to her.
“Give me a hug first, Ben,” Miss Westchester said.
Her voice was youthful, clear and cheery.
Ben leaned down and hugged the old woman.
Then he put her cane to her hand.
She leaned toward it and set her sights on me.
Her eyes were a rich blue color. Her hair very thin, looking to be a mix of brown and auburn.
“This is my partner, Allie Down,” Ben said. “I’m changing my last name from Welloski to Up. Want to know why?”
“Why?” Miss Westchester asked without looking away from me.
“So our nickname can be Up and Down,” Ben said.
Miss Westchester burst into a fit of laughter.
I looked at Ben.
Look at you being smooth. Where did this come from? Or was it just with old ladies?
Miss Westchester coughed and patted her own chest.
“Okay, no more jokes,” Ben said. “I don’t need to call Suzanne, do I?”
“You stop that,” Miss Westchester said.
Ben leaned toward me. “Suzanne’s a paramedic. She’s been here two dozen times. We don’t even call 9-1-1 anymore. Just Suzanne.”
I nodded.
“Are you here about Mike?” Miss Westchester ask, her face turning serious.
“Yes,” I said.
It was amazing how serious it suddenly became. And using the name Mike gave it the appeal that we were actually looking for someone. A human. A missing man. Or boy.
“W
ell come in then,” Miss Westchester said. “I’ll put my teeth in and we can talk.”
“Excuse me?” I asked.
“Don’t you dare do that,” Ben said. “You don’t need to put your teeth in for me. You look perfect just the way you are right now.”
Miss Westchester fanned herself, anything serious gone. She looked at me. “Does he talk this way to you?”
“Nope,” I said. “He must really like you.”
“I’m old enough to be your grandmother,” Miss Westchester said to Ben.
“Hey, what year is it? We can make this work,” Ben said.
Miss Westchester waved a hand. “Did you find Mike?”
“No,” Ben said.
The mood turned somber, skipping serious.
“I’m going to find Mike,” I said to Miss Westchester. “That’s why I’m here. Ben insisted on coming with me. But I wanted to meet you personally. I’m from the city. I just moved here with my niece. And I don’t care what comes across my desk, I take it seriously. Mike is a member of your family.” I looked down to the floor and spotted two cats rubbing their necks against Miss Westchester’s leg. And judging by the lingering ammonia smell of cat urine, there were more inside the house. Many more. “I’m going to find him and bring him home to you.”
“The others miss him,” Miss Westchester said. “Do you want to see pictures?”
“We can’t today,” Ben jumped in. “Soon. We’ll have some coffee and look at pictures.”
“Right. Of course. You’re on the case.”
“On the case,” I said. “I’m bringing Mike home to you, Miss Westchester.”
Her chin quivered.
She reached for me.
I stepped forward and leaned down to hug her.
She had a good hug.
“Thank you for caring,” she said.
I broke the hug. “I’ll always care, Miss Westchester. This is important to me. I will find Mike. I’m going to bring him home. You’re going to go right back to everything normal again.”
“You promise?” she asked.
“Look, in my line of work a promise isn’t worth a thing. So I don’t give promises. What I give is my word. And my word is that I work. I will get your flyer out there. Maybe we can even get some colored flyers. So they can really see what Mike looks like.”
“That would be great,” she said.
“And we will canvas streets, alleys, everywhere. My advice to you? Put some food out for him. Maybe his favorite toy too. You never know.”
“That’s a good idea,” she said. “I’ll do that right now.”
“And we’re going to get to work,” Ben said.
Of course Miss Westchester needed another hug from Ben before we left.
When we got back to his car, he stared at me, smiling.
“What?” I asked.
“You took that serious.”
“Of course I did.”
“You acted like it’s the biggest case of the year.”
“To me, it is,” I said.
“It’s good to have you here again, Allie Down,” Ben said.
I kept my word and made colored copies of the flyer to help find Mike. The cat. It wasn’t the most riveting of detective work but it killed time as I started to put my office together. My eyes kept track of what time it was and I got back to the apartment shortly after the time Lo would get home from school.
I opened the door after a long yet strange first day and called out, “Hey, Lo! I’m home!”
I shut the door and shook my head.
Was she really going to come running from her bedroom to hug me? She wasn’t a little girl anymore. And I was no longer the cool aunt on a quick visit.
“Lo!” I called out again. “I have chocolate!”
Still no response.
I walked to the dining room table and put my bag down.
I smiled. “I have free money!”
That should have gotten something.
Which meant she was on her bed, legs crossed, listening to music.
The hallway to the bedrooms was too small. The bathroom door opposite to the pantry closet. Then two more doors being the bedrooms. Alex’s house was a good size house. Fit for a family. The home Lo grew up in.
But this was home for now. Maybe forever.
I opened Lo’s bedroom door.
She was, in so many ways, my sense of peace.
“Hey, what are…”
Lo wasn’t on her bed.
Or in her room.
Her headphones were the bed, the white string twisted like a piece of spaghetti.
“Lo…”
I turned my head and saw her phone on her desk.
That’s when my heart sank.
What teenager didn’t have their phone glued to their hand?
I blinked fast.
I told myself not to panic.
It was too late.
Lo was missing.
Chapter Twelve
I checked my bedroom and then the bathroom. Lo was nowhere to be found. I tore open the pantry closet and started to kick anything in sight. Again, as though Lo was a little girl and able to hide somewhere in the apartment.
My heart was in my throat.
Any sense of logic, reasoning - acting like a detective and staying calm - was out the window.
Because with Lo there were two hundred possibilities.
I hated myself for not finding her someone to talk to about Alex’s death first. My heart told me to give her time to breathe and gently guide her that way. Because forcing her would only make it worse.
Like they did to me, right?
There were two missing girls.
Two of them, and I know it.
But what did they want? They wanted me to fix myself. To clear my head. I needed to talk to someone before they’d give me my shield, right? I had to go and air it all out. From my childhood up to the moment I went into that basement and found her…
I was back in Lo’s room.
There was no sign of her bag.
Until I walked around the bed.
There was her school bag.
Opened up, tipped over, contents spilled all over the floor.
I covered my mouth with one hand and reached for my phone with the other.
I sucked in a shaky breath and froze.
I froze.
I wasn’t supposed to ever freeze. My job was to be the one who doesn’t freeze. I was the one who chased down the bad guys and never stopped. Even if they shot at me. Even if they came after me with a knife. My job was to be the one who solved everything wrong…
I turned and looked at Lo’s phone on the desk.
I dove toward the desk and grabbed it.
She didn’t have a passcode on the phone.
There were ten thousand apps and it took me way too long to find her text messages.
You don’t even know the names of her friends, Allie. You need to know this stuff. You never know what teenagers are going to do next. Remember when they were eating laundry detergent for fun? Or messing around with outlets to see what would happen?
I shook my head.
The most recent conversation was with Dani Bitch.
There was a yellow star emoji in front of Dani and after Bitch was a middle finger.
I typed a text message to Dani Bitch.
This is Allie, Lo’s aunt. Do you know where she is?
I hated the waiting game so I went to the next conversation.
That one was with Zooey. Just Zooey. No curse words or emojis.
I started to type the same message when the phone started to ring.
It was Dani Bitch calling.
“Hey, this is Allie,” I said. “I need to know-”
“Allie?”
It was Lo’s voice.
“Lo!” I yelled.
“What are you doing?” Lo asked, sounding mortified.
“Excuse me? What are you doing? Your room is trashed. Your bag is all over the floor. Your phone i
s on the desk. I was worried…”
“I’m with Dani,” she said. “It’s on the fridge.”
“It’s on the fridge? What?”
“I had it written down,” Lo said, sounding sad now. “I always used to…”
I ran from Lo’s bedroom to the kitchen.
There was a magnetic calendar on the fridge.
I shut my eyes.
Shit.
Lo told me about the calendar when we were still living in the city. That Alex was obsessed with a written calendar. Not the one on her phone. She liked to write everything out. And she wanted it in a place where everyone can see it. So there would never be any mix-ups. Once it was on the calendar, it was there.
And sure enough, there it was. A handwritten note from Lo on today’s date - Studying w/ Dani until 6.
“It’s on the fridge,” I said. “I see it.”
“But you didn’t see it,” Lo said. “I’m with Dani. Okay? I had her take me to the apartment quick so I could get changed. I spilled barbecue sauce on my shirt at lunch. I smelled like it all day and I hated it. So I ran in to get changed. I dug through my bag to get my history stuff. I’m sorry the bag fell and spilled. I heard Dani beeping so I ran out of the room without my phone.”
“I’m surprised you didn’t come back to get it,” I said, trying to lighten the mood.
“We’re actually studying, Allie,” Lo said.
Maybe we should go back to Aunt Allie…
“I’m sorry, Lo. I saw you weren’t here and I-”
“You panicked,” Lo said. “You’re used to the worst always happening. I’m fine. Nothing is going to happen to me. You’re waiting for something to go wrong with me. I get it.”
“No, Lo, come on, I would never…”
“I get it,” she said again. “I lost my mother. You want me to talk to you or somebody about it. But how about giving me a chance for a second? Okay? I’m trying to get settled here too. Okay?”
“Okay,” I said. “You’re studying until six. I see it. I hear you. Can I bring you your phone? I’ll drive it over.”
“I’m fine,” Lo said. “If I need anything I’ll use Dani’s phone to call my phone.”
“That sounds perfect.”
The call went dead.
I put both Lo’s phone and my phone on the counter and stepped back.
I leaned against the counter and stared at the calendar on the fridge.