by Ali Parker
I used to think the idea of love was a bunch of bullshit. My own parents hadn’t exactly been a stellar example for me. My father had mostly raised me on his own and was steady as a rock. Yet, my mother had bounced in and out of our lives as she struggled with the demons of addiction. I’d gone on to get snowed by Wesley when I was too young to know better. It wasn’t as if Wesley started out as a controlling, abusive boyfriend. No, rather, he’d been charming and endearing at first. It was only after I was in too deep, pregnant and scrambling to keep my head above water with the business of life that I came to see who he was behind the façade. Once it dropped, he never bothered to charm me again.
I’d felt beyond lucky to find the strength to leave him and even luckier to move away from Savannah back to my hometown. My hopes that the distance between Wesley and me would get his focus off of me had gone up in smoke. He’d followed us to Cypress Creek and then gotten crazy with his threats again once I started seeing Jeremy.
Yet, despite all of that, Jeremy had stood by me. He was so there for me, I hardly knew what to do with it. I’d accepted it was destined to be just Austin and me for the rest of my life. But Jeremy had smashed right through that belief by not only accepting Austin, but by genuinely caring about him, fiercely protecting him, and even making my fight for custody of him his own. He’d found a lawyer for me and saw himself as part of the case as much as I was.
Austin missed him too. I wondered what he was thinking about as he stared out of his window watching the trees roll by on our way home. "Are you thinking about all the new things you learned today?"
Austin shrugged and slid his eyes to mine in the rear view mirror for just a second before training them on the trees again. "Not really. A lot of the stuff we're doing now is stuff I already learned in Cypress."
Dammit. I felt like pounding my steering wheel in frustration. Austin had been in preschool in Cypress Creek, but where he was now was only a straight up daycare. The places that offered preschool in Savannah were a lot more expensive, and I couldn't afford them.
Just another reminder of how selfish Wesley was, that he would mess with his own child's education only to get back at me. It was a living nightmare. Every time these thoughts ran laps in my mind, I had to remember it wasn’t worth it to let Wesley take up so much of my mental energy.
Pulling up outside of the home where we were staying, I parked the car in the shade of one of the big trees on the tree-lined street. While the area we were staying was pretty with the canopy of trees arching over the street and old houses that looked straight out of a historical romance novel, our apartment itself was tiny and cramped. We lived on the second floor of an old historical home in a small two-bedroom apartment. My boss back in Cypress Creek had helped me scout it down.
"Wash up before dinner, okay?" I asked as Austin and I trudged up the worn, wooden steps to our apartment. I hadn’t wanted to sign a long-term lease, so my options for rentals had been more limited.
"Sure thing, mom." He nodded, letting the strap of his backpack slide down his arm and land with a thud on the floor once we stepped through our front door. "I'll be right back."
Heading to the bigger of the two bedrooms, which I'd let him have so we'd be able to fit his toys, his little shoulders were slumped as he disappeared from view. I sighed, running my hands through hair before turning to make sure the door was locked.
Double and triple checking our door had become something of a habit for me. I was so on edge about Wesley. As he'd done before I'd moved away, one of the reasons I decided to move in the first place, he tried stopping by a few times since we'd been back.
I could only assume he'd gotten our new address from the court papers. It was unsettling that despite the pending litigation between us, he was still so brazen about showing up whenever he wanted. The first time it happened, I'd phoned my attorney back in Cypress immediately.
Savannah had advised me to file a protective order against him to stop it from happening. I did as she said, but it hadn't deterred him, and he'd violated it several times already.
Also as she'd advised, I called the cops every time he violated it, but he was always gone by the time they got here. Apparently, my word wasn't enough evidence that the order had in fact been violated. It was beyond frustrating to me we were still waiting for a court date to modify the order that had forced me to return to Savannah. My attorney had filed for an expedited hearing, but Wesley’s attorney had opposed it. According to my attorney, the family court docket in Savannah stayed busy, which didn’t help matters with scheduling.
Frustration and that irritating sense of helplessness that followed me around when it came to Wesley nagged at me. I huffed to my small bedroom, wishing there was a damn thing I could do about my situation.
Throwing myself onto my bed, I closed my eyes to try clear my mind. My silent temper tantrum wasn't going to change a thing, but it was the only outlet I had. The room was so small that my bed took up most of it, my dresser drawers only able to open half way.
Austin and I always stayed in relatively small places since that was the best I could afford, but this was ridiculous. The apartment was hot and humid, and I had to fight back tears as once again the reality of my situation hit me.
I'd lived in Savannah for over six years, but I didn’t have many friends here. I was essentially alone. Wesley had done a fine job of driving every friend I'd ever made away. While some were sympathetic, they also had no desire to get involved. If it hadn’t been for Sarah, my boss in Cypress Creek, hooking me up with a friend of hers here who needed temp work at her salon, I’d be flat broke.
Moving back to Cypress Creek had been like injecting new life into myself and Austin. We'd both made friends, new and old. For a while there, I'd stupidly let myself believe that maybe, just maybe, Wesley would let me move on. But that wasn't to be.
Just like Austin, I missed Cypress and the life we were making there for ourselves. Most of all, I missed Jeremy. Missing him was a visceral ache in my heart.
Tears pricked at the backs of my eyes when I thought about Jeremy, but then Austin called for me. It was time to quit my impromptu pity party and make dinner.
"How about I make some spaghetti?" I asked, walking into our kitchenette. It was little more than a counter with space for a small fridge, a sink and a stove.
Austin brightened up a little. "That's my favorite."
"That's why I think we should have it." I smiled, wanting to do whatever small things I could to make this easier on him. "Do you want to get out our plates while I start cooking?"
He nodded and carefully went about his task while I prepared our meal. Since we didn't have space for a dining room table, we ate our quiet dinner at the kitchen counter, both lost in thought.
"Your show is about to start," I told him, referring to the comedy show he watched every night in the half an hour of TV time he had before bed. "You run along, I'll be right there."
“Okay.” Scrambling from the kitchen, he skidded a bit on his socks as he rounded the corner on the old wooden floors in our apartment and clicked the TV on, the happy voices of the characters floating to my ears soon after.
Austin fell asleep on the couch before his show ended. I carried him to bed before returning to the couch, trying to find some kind of mindless entertainment that might lull me to sleep as well. I was flipping through channels when my phone started ringing and I grabbed it, silencing the ringer before it woke Austin.
My heart melted at the picture of Jeremy that came up on my phone. It was one taken one day in the park back in Cypress when Jeremy had come to watch one of Austin's tee-ball practices. Jeremy had Austin on his back in the photo and they were both wearing wide smiles.
Seeing that picture and having Jeremy call made my day. Sliding my thumb across the green prompt, I answered eagerly. "I was just thinking about you."
"Yeah?" His voice was low, lazy. It sent shivers down my spine and I relaxed into the couch. "What were you thinking?"
"Just about…" I didn't want to come across as a complete loon by telling him that I replayed our time together on a loop in my head, so I stuck with being vague. "You know, tee-ball on Saturdays and those kinds of things."
Jeremy chuckled, a genuine, rumbling sound that made my heart clench. "You’re lying. You were thinking about all those nights after tee-ball practice when Austin went for sleepovers at Tommy's, weren't you?"
"Maybe," I murmured. Those nights we shared were the stuff my fantasies were made of and had most definitely occupied plenty of space in my thoughts. Just thinking about them now was making me hot and bothered, so I changed the topic. "How was your day?"
"It was okay." He sounded distracted and the achy parts of me wondered if he was in bed, and possibly having the same distracting thoughts I'd just been having about him.
But then he shattered the illusion. "It was pretty damn boring actually. I had so much admin to catch up on I think seeing another piece of paperwork is going to make me pass out from boredom. Yours?"
"It's better now," I told him honestly, not wanting to replay my depressing days here without him. "What are you up to now?"
"Went for a beer with Evan. I'm on my way home now. Thought I'd check in before it got too late."
Evan was his middle brother, if I remembered their order correctly. A mechanic or something. I hadn't met him yet, at least not in any kind of capacity as Jeremy's girlfriend. But I remembered him from way back when. He was a looker, but then again Jeremy’s entire family was blessed in the looks department.
"Speaking of my brothers," Jeremy said. "Tyson is in the process of filing charges. I'm hoping he gets it done this week."
"Me too." I sighed, letting my eyes flutter shut as I sent up a quick prayer that just maybe his brother could help us sort this out faster. "Tell him thanks from me again. I really appreciate all his help."
"Will do, but you do remember this is his job?"
"I know, but it still makes me feel better to know that he’s on it."
"It will all be okay, Marie," he assured me soothingly. "Just hang in there, but if you want to talk about it, I'm right here."
"I know, I can't wait to see you this weekend."
"Me either. It sucked this morning when I realized it was only Tuesday." I could hear the smile in his voice and it brought one to my lips. A feat only Jeremy and Austin could manage these days.
I suspected in Jeremy's case, it was because I was falling in love with him. We talked for a little while longer and at the end, I had the urge to tell him that I loved him, but I held back.
This was hardly the time or the circumstance for a declaration of love. If we were going to last, I hardly wanted this to be the way he remembered me telling him I was in love with him for the first time.
"Sleep tight, love." My heart stuttered a little as he said the word, sending a curl of happiness through me. It wasn't the first time he'd called me that, but I wasn't even sure he realized he was doing it so it didn't count.
Running through a million different ways to end the call, I settled for the marvelously mundane. "You too, Jeremy. Sweet dreams."
I bit my tongue from adding 'I love you', quickly disconnecting the call before I said it anyway. I really had to work on my damn timing.
* * *
Marie & Jeremy’s story continues in Down & Dirty #3, available May 10th, 2018
* * *
Preorder here: Down & Dirty #3
Acknowledgments
To our readers - because that’s why we write. JH always thanks her dogs & her hubs because they are her best cheerleaders. Well, that and coffee. Ali is a force of nature & thanks the army behind her with her hubs & three kids.
We decided to create a series together, and it’s been nothing but fun. A shout out to Yoly Cortez for making magic with this cover and to our editor for holding our feet to the fire. A bow of thanks to our invaluable advance readers. Many, many thanks to Mary W., Charlotte B., Katelyn W. and Ashley B. They keep us in line and clean up the details. There were twice as many this time, but who’s counting?
* * *
xoxo
Ali & JH
Ali Parker is a USA Today Best Selling contemporary and new adult romance writer with more than a hundred and thirty books behind her. She loves coffee, watching a great movie and hanging out with her hubs. By hanging out, she means making out. Hanging out is for those little creepy elves at Christmas. No tight green stockings for her.
She’s an entrepreneur at heart and loves coming up with more ideas than any one person should be allowed to access. She lives in Texas with her hubs and three kiddos and looks forward to traveling the world in a few years. Writing under eleven pen names keeps her busy and allows her to explore all genres and types of writing.
If you enjoyed her writing style, please check out her other pen names at the pen names link below!
* * *
Website ~ Insider’s Group ~ Facebook ~ Twitter
Instagram ~ Pinterest ~ Google+
Parker’s Posse ~ Pen Names
USA Today Bestselling Author J. H. Croix lives in a small town in the historical farmlands of Maine with her husband and two spoiled dogs. Croix writes steamy contemporary romance with sassy independent women and rugged alpha men who aren't afraid to show some emotion. Her love for quirky small-towns and the characters that inhabit them shines through in her writing. Take a walk on the wild side of romance with her bestselling novels!
Sign up for my newsletter: http://jhcroixauthor.com/subscribe/
Places you can find me & my books:
jhcroixauthor.com
[email protected]
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
* * *
Copyright © 2018 J.H. Croix & Ali Parker
All rights reserved.
Cover design by Cormar Covers
* * *
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
Created with Vellum