A hand touched her shoulder. She jumped and spun around.
A wide-eyed Jack stood before her. “I don’t recall you ever being easy to spook.”
Kate took several deep breaths to try and calm her racing heart. There was no way, she could explain to him the fear she faced.
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.”
She turned back to the window and looked at the mountains, wondering if for the rest of her life she would be feeling such sadness as she gazed at them. The rich beauty she found herself surrounded in should be a welcome escape from the pollution and busy city life she had been immersed in but to her it represented another form of entrapment.
Jack walked to her side and stopped. The sweet scent of earth and soap floated to her. She hadn’t known that two such simple scents could make such an entrancing combination. “I have arranged an outing, I guess you could say.”
She glanced at him from the corning of her eye, raising one of her brows.
“I suggested to Travis that we go fishing, and he agreed. The cooks have made a small luncheon for us to take after breakfast.”
Kate nodded. Maybe this would be good. She would get a chance to know Leila and become comfortable with her brother. But the real question was, could she stand spending time with the only man she ever loved as he showered his affections on another woman? A woman she feared wasn’t worthy of him.
***
After they enjoyed a somber breakfast where everyone sat around in complete silence barely speaking, Jack’s small party set out for the creek. It was too late in the morning to catch any good fish, but that was not his goal. He wanted everyone to spend time together. Though he couldn’t quite put a finger on it there seemed to be a growing tension among those he cared for.
Leila kept sending spiteful glances to Kate and Travis’s glared had fixed on him more than once. Did he harbor anger towards him because Jack was reluctant to open up his land to the threat of pollution or was there something else? Something he didn’t want to think about.
Though Leila clung to his arm, his gaze couldn’t help trailing to Kate. The light grey dress she wore with a ragged hem seemed to compliment her stooped shoulders and bent head as she walked next to Travis. Though he hadn’t seen her in years, he could still read her. Something bothered her, and by the way she kept widening the space between her and Travis, he could tell she was not pleased with the match her father had made for her.
A sense of protectiveness came over him. The same kind of protectiveness that came over him, when at the age of fourteen, he noticed a vulnerability in her eyes when she looked at him. A vulnerability that had sent small prickles of excitement through him. At the time he had been too young to understand why. But now those same prickles of excitement had returned, and something else had emerged. Something else that made him understand those early prickles of excitement.
Last night in his dreams, he saw a future with Kate at his side, loving him and supporting him in his dreams of running a successful cattle ranch and enjoying the land as if he was Walt Whitman himself.
He had never had such dreams of Leila. Why was that? Why did Kate seem to have such effect on him in such a few days? Was it because every month he eagerly anticipated her letters and then when he received one, he kept reading it repeatedly? Did he now yearn for the kind gentle nature her letters always displayed? He didn’t know but he would need to explore these feelings. Even if he was supposed to marry someone else in a few weeks.
They made their way to the small creek that lay a few feet in the forests that surrounded his property. A small rumbling of water filled the air as the clear water trickled over rocks and thick green moss. Tadpoles and minnows were abundant and would nibble on their worms without ever being caught.
Jack tried to hand Travis and Leila wooden fishing poles, but they both just scoffed off and sat on a boulder next to each other. Jack turned to Kate, and a lightness filled him as he handed her a rod. She took it with no hesitation and bent picking out the perfect juicy wiggly worm and with no qualms slid it on the hook. And just like old times, he watched how she gracefully threw the line into the water, and took up the perfect fishing stance.
“Dear Lord, when you’re my wife, you will never do that again,” Travis said a harshness in his voice.
Kate stiffened and the smile fled from her face as she stared out at the water. The rod shook in her hands.
“I thought city girls were supposed to be refined.” A smirk crossed Leila’s face.
“Leila,” Jack said, looking at her sternly. How could she have said something so rude?
Leila just shrugged her shoulders as she twirled a curl around her finger.
Jack worked his jaw, thinking of what he had just witnessed. How much did he really know of his fiancée’? Their courtship had been so quick and he had been overcome with her beauty. But was that all he saw in her? He shook his head and bent to Kate’s ear.
“I kind of like a girl who can bait her own rod.”
He realized his mistakes as soon as she turned to him, and a longing filled her eyes. A longing that mirrored the one piling through him. Something was happening to him. Something that he knew he only had a week to figure out.
Without much thought, he took a step closer to her while baiting his rod. The fresh scent of rose water floated to him as it mixed with the scent of grass and creek water. “It’s kind of nice reliving our favorite childhood memory.”
“Maybe our children will be able to do it together.” Her words sounded so subdued.
He wondered if they would be able to. They would be cousins, but part of him wanted them to be siblings.
“You know this is boring,” Travis said as he jumped off the rock, and walked towards them. He gripped Kate’s arm and Jack saw her visibly stiffened. “Why don’t you put that rod down, and let’s take a walk.”
Kate’s eyes widened, and she looked to Jack, a plea almost seemed to cover her face. She was afraid of Travis. Why?
“It wouldn’t be proper,” he said, setting his pole to the side.
Travis’s eyes narrowed, and he let go of Kate’s arm. He took a step closer to Jack, and bent to his ear.
“Just remember, who you’re engaged to,” he said, before stalking off with Leila following him.
Little did he know that was all Jack could thing about.
He turned to Kate realizing that they were alone now. A tear slipped down her cheek and pain stabbed at his heart. He didn’t want to see her hurt. But he feared there was nothing he could do about it. According to her father, she was marrying Travis because her family was on the brink of bankruptcy. But what if.... He tried to dismiss the thought. A thought that clung to him. Attacked him. What if he married her?
As the thoughts settled in his mind, he realized it brought him much joy. He would have to analyze this thought some more. But now he needed to see to Kate’s care.
“You’re not happy with this arrangement,” he said.
Kate dropped the pole, and turned, running off, leaving him to wonder what he had said wrong.
SIX
Kate pushed from her bed, letting her feet meet the cold floor of her bedroom. Slight snores from her sister floated to her as she rolled over and occupied the space Kate had just vacated. She couldn’t sleep. And part of her wondered if she would ever again.
Kate lit her small lantern, slipped on a housecoat and tied her hair into a bun. A few strands instantly fell and lay across her cheek. Though a weight filled her making her want to lie down under the covers and escape the world she had been trapped in, the nerves rattling through her wouldn’t let her drift into dreamland. Especially since she knew her dreams would be filled with Travis attacking her. She didn’t know why the man caused such a visceral reaction in her but he did. And when he had gripped her arm earlier, small stabs of pain had covered it. She had tried to hide it from Jack. Hopefully, he hadn’t notice.
As she made her way down the stairs to the kitchen she t
hought of earlier when she had ran from the creak. She had found a quiet spot in the barn, sitting in an empty abandoned horse stall and let the tears release from her. How she yearned to experience the kindness that had been reflected in Jack’s voice. To feel his arms wrap around her and chase the world away. This just wasn’t fear she had screamed out, but as her screams died away, only silence responded to her.
Kate pushed open the kitchen door, and stepped in, stopping in her tracks. She swallowed hard looking at the object of her affection as he sat at the kitchen table, a teacup in his hands, and a slight wideness to his eyes. She had avoided him all evening. Claiming she wasn’t feeling well, so she didn’t have to join everyone for dinner. And now here he sat before her with no one else around.
She turned to look at the long dark hall she had just emerged from. Perhaps, she could return, making her excuses.
A chair scraped against the wood floor. Though her mind told her to flee, her heart told her to stay. Her heart won. Heavy footsteps floated to her, and she gripped the door handle.
Jack stopped next to her, and though she wouldn’t look at him, his presence overwhelmed her.
“I wish you would talk to me,” he said, his voice sounding so soothing.
She lay her head on the door as tears slipped down her face and pain sliced into her heart. He wanted to talk. But what should she tell him? That she loved him? That she had always loved him and with each letter her love for him grew? What would he think of that? Especially since he was engaged to someone else.
“Are you afraid of Travis?”
She squinted her eye closed. He noticed. Now what should she tell him?
Jack gripped her arm and gently pulled her away from the door. Taking her shoulders he spun her to face him. With the slight press of two fingers, he tilted her face towards his eyes, and what she saw there broke down all her defenses. Tears rushed from her, and she buried her face into her hands.
Two strong arms flung around her and she found herself in the embrace she always craved, but thought she never would feel.
“What did he do to you. Please tell me.”
“I can’t.”
“Try. Please, I want to protect you. I want to l....”
His words died away and her head snapped up. He wants to what? That last word almost sounded like love. Could he? No. He loved someone else.
Jack’s shoulders deflated and though he still held her tightly in his arms, he looked above her head as though he didn’t quite know what to do. A war seemed to be raging in his eyes. A war she didn’t quite understand.
“We have always been such close friends, haven’t we?” he finally said.
“We have been?”
He looked at her, and a longing filled his eyes.
“Then tell me why am I questioning that now.”
She bent her head to the side. She had no idea what he was getting out. Why was he questioning her friendship? Whatever he was trying to say, she knew, it wasn’t about a sudden dislike for her.
Jack let go of her, and turned from her, shoving his hands in his pockets, like he’d always done when he was unsure of something. When they were children and he would make such a stance, she would always suggest chasing some bird or splashing in the creek. But they were not children anymore. And he could no longer lose himself in childhood games, but must face the problems presented to him.
“Tell me what troubles you,” she said.
Jack looked back at her, a smile tugged at the corners of his lips. “I don’t think I love her.”
Kate blinked. That was the last thing she had expected him to say. “You don’t?” she croaked.
Jack crossed his arms over his chest, and slowly started shaking his head. “I don’t know why, but my views towards Leila are changing, and I feel lost. What do you think?”
What she thought could be seen as self-serving, but if she was his friend, she should help protect him from what could be a disastrous mistake even if it cast her in a bad light.
“I worry, she only wants the mine.”
“I think your right.”
Kate felt her brows rise. “Do you?”
“She’s been pushing for it, and she threatened not to marry me if I don’t give in.”
“Then she definitely doesn’t love you. No woman truly in love would make such a statement.”
He uncrossed his arms and nodded looking at the floor.
“I think I’m going to break it off tomorrow.”
Kate’s mouth fell open and a small light of hope filled her. A ray of hope that she didn’t dare want to believe in yet. Just not yet. But if he did, would there be a chance for them?
Jack’s eyes locked onto her as he walked to her. Her body trembled as he stopped in front of her.
“You’re scared of Travis. I know you are. I can see why. I saw the way he gripped you.”
She had to tell him. She had to let him know of her concerns. She licked her dry lips.
“He tries to take liberties with me.”
“He what?” Jack’s shout made her take a step backwards. A fire burned in his eyes. A fire she wondered where it would go.
“I swear to God,” He balled his hands into fists.
“Jack...” she pleaded.
“You’re not marrying him.”
“I have... ”
“No.” He gripped her again crashing her to his chest before his arms wrapped around her in a tight grip. “You’re going to marry me.”
Kate clenched his arms. Did he just propose? But that wasn’t a proposal. That was a command. A command that didn’t fill her with fear, but a sense of protection.
Slowly she raised her face to his and before she knew it, his lips had planted on hers and a swirl of emotions poured through her. Emotions of love, and intense peace. She rose on her toes and met his kiss, losing herself in the moment.
Soon he broke apart from her and stared down into her eyes, as they both fought for breath. That was what she always dreamed of. Always hoped for her. Jack brushed back her hair from her face as a half smile slipped on his face.
“We were always meant to be together, weren’t we?” he said.
“I’ve always loved you, Jack.”
“And I’ve always loved you. So will you? Will you marry me once I break of the engagement?”
“How could I ever refuse?”
He bent and kissed her head.
“You best get to bed. We have a busy day tomorrow.”
She nodded and turned from him. With a bounce in her steps she walked to the steps, skipping up them. It wouldn't be fear that would keep her awake tonight. It would be the joys that waited for her just beyond the sunrise. God had just answered her prayers.
SEVEN
This was a conversation best had in town. Jack rode his wagon into the small town, with wooden stores lining the dirt street. A few ladies gathered in front of the mercantile store probably waiting for the arrival of the new dishes the owner had been touting forever. Maybe they had finally arrived. Smoke billowed from the blacksmiths, floating upwards contrasting with the light blue sky.
Winter approached, and thoughts of snuggling with Kate on the lounger next to a roaring fire filled his mind. Maybe they could sip warm tea and read to each other the letters they had written over the years. Another realization sunk deep into him. He never had such thoughts about Leila. In fact, he never dreamed of a future with her. What would his life have turned out like, if Kate and her family hadn’t come to visit? He imagined his infatuation with the blonde, blue eyed beauty would have quickly faded and he would have been stuck in a loveless marriage and died a bitter man. Thank the Lord for his intervention.
As soon, as he broke off his engagement with Leila, he and Kate planned to announce their plans to their families. He was sure there would be many questions, and concerns. Some he didn’t know the answer to. But he knew one thing. It would be a short engagement. There was no way, he could have Kate in his home long without her being his wife. And there
was no way he would ever let her move out. So a quick marriage it had to be. Maybe a very quick marriage.
Just on the other side of the town, he spotted a two-story brick building surrounded by a white picket fence. Red and orange leaves fell from the cottonwood tree and lay in small piles.
A sense of dread filled him. A dread that made him want to turn around and flee this moment. But that was the coward’s way out. And he was no coward. He needed to remember one thing though. If Leila actually loved him, this would be much harder because he wouldn’t want to break her heart. But that was not what he was afraid of. No, he was wary about facing her anger. He always had a feeling anger rested under all that beauty and he had no idea what it would push her to.
He parked his wagon, and secured the reigns. He patted his horses, as they knelt to munch on some grass, before he walked to the front door of the home.
He gave a slight knock on the white door and waited, turning to look at the tall mountains in the distance. Savior of the world give me strength, he prayed.
The door open and he turned back around to see Leila standing in the doorway. A smile fluttered across her face as she tipped her head to the side, batting her eyelashes.
“Come to talk business with Travis?”
That was the first thing she thought of. Didn’t she wonder if maybe he came to see her? To spend time with the woman he thought he loved. How blind he had been? He should have seen her true nature much sooner.
“I actually came to see you.”
A small light dimmed in her eyes. Did she have any idea that he was about to end things with her? She must. He hadn’t done a good job of hiding where his heart lay.
Jack took a deep breath and squared his shoulders. This was not going to be easy, but it would have to be done.
“I think we need to talk.”
Leila stepped out of the doorway, and crossed her arms, as her eyes narrowed.
“Let me guess the little twat has stolen you away from me.”
Such venom laced her words. “It’s just....”
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