by Guy Antibes
“How can you put pure anything into these bottles?” Lorna knew the answer and wondered if she could bear to hear him say it.
“I’m an adept at materials separation. I merely looked at the air and separated the elements. At the same density, gases don’t weigh the same. Hydrogen is lighter than oxygen.” Harlan handed him another bottle. Panis put his hand over the bottle. This is Nitrogen. It’s lighter than oxygen but not by much. At the same pressure, temperature and density, the elements weigh different amounts. There is a chart that you probably have in that textbook. There are 60 elements that we know of. Some combine easier than others and it has to do with their weight and we’ve been able to plot them in a table.”
She hadn’t quite heard it explained so simply before. Interest began to light up her mind as she now understood what she had read. “I understand.” How could she have missed this?
“Do you want to conduct some experiments?” Harlan said. “Panix can help us do combinations.”
Panix gave Harlan one of those slimy smiles. “In fact, I’m working on more alloys, Harlan. Perhaps Lorna might want to participate in some real work.”
“Magical work?” she said.
“That’s how you do it in small quantities, Lorna. Magic makes the beginning easier,” Panix said.
“Magic. It’s all about magic to you, isn’t it?” She felt the old resentment and anger take over. “I don’t want to learn it the magic way.” She gathered her books and left them. Lorna didn’t care if they did look surprised. She couldn’t stand the thought of having Panix rub her nose in his magical power.
As she shoved her books and papers into her saddlebag and climbed up on her horse and rode out of the works, Panix’s words about the elements stayed with her and she thought about elements all the way home.
~
The light green of new leaves shading the sun turned the site into a wonderland, made Panix smile as he toured the progress of his second home. It was nearing completion and he looked forward to spending the next three weeks finishing up the house, using his own magic to make the house stand forever.
He ran his fingers along every joint, strengthened every pane of glass and infused magic in every beam and board. Panix looked forward to bringing Merra here. Perhaps she didn’t need to spend all her time in Pent City. He could bring her here and they could raise their children together. Motherhood might be the way to bring more joy into her life.
Panix sat on the steps leading to the porch. Amidst all the excitement he wondered if this house could pry Merra away from the wine she now loved. He hoped this house, no this home, would cement their marriage just like the mortar between the stones.
He let his daydreaming continue as he concentrated and let them power his work.
~
It had been two weeks since Panix left. Merra paced to and fro in their drawing room. He would be back in four days from his trip to a village close to the Gerellian border. In her hand she held a note from Baston Blox. She pressed it to her bosom and wondered if she should respond. A messenger stood just outside the door waiting for a reply.
She felt empty inside. After a year and a half in this dreadful place, Panix still couldn’t understand her. The mighty magician failed at conjuring up a happy marriage. How could she compete with her husband? Her magic was so puny beside his. She detested his every act of helping her find a job. A job, as if she were a common woman. Merra snorted at the thought. With her beauty, she’d never considered herself common, despite her humble upbringing.
She knew how men of all ages looked at her—admired her every move. Panix was as smitten as all the others and he walked all over himself to try and please her, but his efforts no longer worked. She tired of his incessant compliance to her wishes, even with her unspoken demands.
He wanted her to work, he wanted her to bear children, but he never exhibited the firmness she wanted in a man. She wanted to obey him, but all he wanted to do was let her have her way so he could bury himself in his work and in those darned books, all the while looking down at her lack of talent. His actions continued to frustrate her. The frustration turned to irritation and wine made that irritation disappear.
An errant tear made its way down her face to drop on the floor. She felt her cheek. A bit of her life’s water? She’d been careful to suppress her fertility. She couldn’t bear to bring a child into a world that would mock her in the same way her husband silently did.
A limpid light came into her eyes. Such a simple solution. She would look at it as her own personal triumph. Something to withhold from her husband. Something to hold over him. Something he couldn’t take from her, like he’d taken so much happiness through his superiority and his utter ignorance of her real feelings.
Baston would cherish her, for this one night. One dalliance. A treat she could forever savor. He would treat her as a possession, something to be conquered. She longed to be conquered.
Crushing the note in her fist, she walked to the door and instructed the messenger, the answer was yes. She would be ready for the coach in three hours time.
Merra went to the wine cabinet and filled a goblet of wine. Just this one, to help her through. Then maybe another goblet to celebrate. A wispy smile crossed her lips as another tear tracked down her face. The wine tasted so good as the irritation disappeared.
~
The carriage struggled up the track leading to the house in the woods. Oak and other deciduous trees grew thickly in these woods close to the Gerellian border. Panix hoped the change in the environment would work a change on his wife.
“Close your eyes, Merra,” he said as they rounded a turn in the new road. She smiled as she clapped her hands over her eyes.
“Now,” Panix said. He took her hands in his, kissing them. “Look.” A house stood by a meadow with a small lake glistening in the sun. This was no cabin, but a house with sturdy rock walls and lots of windows. A barn roof could be seen peeking over the slate roof of the house. “We can come here whenever we want.”
Panix took Merra’s face in his hands and kissed her. They ran in to the house. Panix burst with pride as she discovered every nook and cranny of their second home. Merra could sense the magic about the place.
“This must have cost a fortune. How can we afford it? You had it built it with magic.”
“My father’s inheritance came last year. We are well enough fixed, although it took some doing to pry Corlee’s and my share from Polla. I did most of the magic myself, while I was gone.”
She ran into his arms. “It’s wonderful.” She kissed him again. Panix couldn’t be happier.
~
Lorna Baltac looked at herself in the mirror of her bedroom. This was her eighteenth birthday and today she became an adult. She held the beautiful gown she had purchased secretly. Lorna wondered how nice it would have been to wear this at a ball. She sighed and hung the gown in her closet. She wanted a ball for her birthday, but the country would be in mourning for another three months after the death of the Marquis.
Books littered her desk. Could she wait three more years to graduate from Pent University with a First in Engineering? Silks and study. She smiled. Her degree would be worth it.
Patience, she thought, as she pulled out a blouse and gray-green wool suit. She’d be able to ask her father and how could he refuse? He didn’t know she studied engineering. How could he refuse? But in the meantime, she’d ask him again.
“Good morning, Father,” she said as she entered their dining room.
“Morning, dear.” Foald Baltac liked to eat all of his meals in the dining room after Lorna’s mother died. He’d told her the room brought back good memories of all the times they had entertained. “What are your plans for today?” He buttered a slice of bread.
“I want to kick around the factory for a while and see what’s going on and then I have a lunch planned with some friends.” Lorna picked at the pile of fruit on her plate.
“The factory? Why bother? It will be there tomor
row, enjoy yourself today.”
“I want to be ready to take over the company when the time is right.” Lorna prepared herself for the inevitable words of rejection.
“A magician will run the company, Lorna. We’ve been over this time and time again. It’s not that you are my daughter. If I had a son and he didn’t have any magical talent, he wouldn’t be succeeding me, either.” Foald picked up a slice of bacon and waved it at her. “And don’t go on about Panix Gavid.”
“Well, isn’t he your successor? He is your best wizard.”
“I’ve told you, he’s too young. I won’t hand over my factory to a twenty-one year old, no matter how competent he is.”
“But later?”
“Later is a long time off. Besides, the power that young man wields is more than any other magician in the company and I’m not sure I’m comfortable with that.” He popped the last of the bacon in his mouth.
~
Lorna arrived late to the restaurant. Her friends all stood and kissed her cheeks wishing her a happy birthday. In spite of this morning’s disappointment, she felt happy and excited that she to be an adult.
“I can drink now, can’t I?” she giggled along with her friends. “Perhaps we can go to a pub tonight after dinner and get a little tipsy.”
“I’m free,” Willa said raising her hand. The blonde woman was Lorna’s best friend and at a year older, she was certainly more experienced in ordering alcoholic beverages. “I know just the place. It’s a little pub run by a man from South Pent.”
Lorna’s eyes widened with excitement. “Maybe he knows some drinking songs like my steward used to teach me when I was younger.” She giggled when she said it and clapped her hands. “I am no longer a child.” That brought another round of laughter.
~
Dinner started late. Foald had invited some of his close friends to share the birthday dinner. Lorna tried to be as polite and as gracious as she could when they congratulated her for her birthday.
Her father rose just before dessert. “Lorna I want you to look outside the window.” She walked over to her father and they both went to a window. Outside a young mare stood in the gaslights
“For me?” Lorna cried with excitement. “She’s beautiful.” She hugged her father. “I’ll take her for a ride in the morning.” She kissed his cheek. They sat back down. Lorna couldn’t help but beam — a new horse and now a night out with her friend. She shivered with delight.
Lorna and Willa walked into the pub an hour later. “A table towards the back, if you please,” Willa said to the barmaid.
“I’m so excited. My new horse is so beautiful,” Lorna said as they sat at their table and Willa ordered wine.
The wine came. Lorna smiled as Willa toasted, “To a marvelous friend and may you find your true future.”
Lorna wasn’t exactly sure what her future held, but she sipped her wine without a word. It wasn’t her first taste, but it was the first time she had ordered it in a public place. She rolled the red liquid in her mouth and felt the alcohol warming up the inside of her mouth.
A few minutes later, a man started singing in the pub. Lorna could feel her heart lift as she recognized the song. As more of the patrons joined in, Lorna began to sing herself. This couldn’t be a more wonderful treat, she thought as she realized that perhaps she needed to sing a little less loudly.
A man and a woman entered the room. As she recognized both of them she stopped and turned away, not wanting to be recognized. She looked from the side as Baston Blox slid a chair out for Merra Gavid. As Baston walked to his seat, Merra lifted her hand and let it slide along Baston’s in a show of affection. Lorna was relieved that neither faced her table.
“I don’t want to be seen.” Lorna turned her head.
“Why not? You know Minister Blox,” Willa said.
“He is escorting the wife of Panix Gavid, Father’s best magician.” She put her hand on her friends arm. “This is so awkward.”
“There is a back exit.” Willa looked behind her.
Lorna felt increasingly uncomfortable and rushed out the door with Willa in tow.
As they walked down the alley and out into the street Lorna could now express her shock, “I never knew! Oh how awful.”
“I didn’t think you liked Gavid,” Willa said as they walked to their waiting coach.
“I don’t, but I’d never wish such a thing on anyone,” Lorna said, confused by her strong reaction to the couple.
Willa smiled. “But that is the way of the world. Now that you’re an adult, you will be exposed more and more to a number of Baston Blox’s and their mistresses who are married to other men.” She put her hand to her mouth and laughed softly.
“Maybe so. Perhaps I’m not ready to be of age.” Lorna said as she stepped into the carriage. “Maybe I want a simpler life.”
“You won’t get it, my friend. My mother told me that life just gets more and more complicated as you get older. It’s unavoidable. I’ve seen enough to know she’s right.”
Lorna remained silent, thinking about her sheltered upbringing as they rode off into the night.
~
Panix woke in the chill of early morning. He sniffed the air and leaned over, smelling alcohol on Merra’s breath. It was difficult to do, but Panix concentrated using a touch of magic to improve his sense of smell and detected a Southern Pent vintage. With Merra’s wine addiction, Panix had, as a consequence, acquired a taste for wine. Not just for its alcoholic effects, but he appreciated the nuances the varying vintages of wine offered. He thought his wife might join him in his appreciation, but she was more interested in getting to a destination with her drinking rather than the journey.
He lay with his eyes open. There were no South Pent vintages in the house. She had sneaked out in the night while he worked late with Harlan. Another man? It was likely, as relations between them had dwindled to nothing in the months since they returned from their new house. He wanted to put it down to boredom and unhappiness in the city, since she’d seemed to be so happy at the house.
He was looking forward to spending more time in the country, but Merra kept finding excuses not to go. Now he knew why she never complained anymore about him working past midnight.
Why had she done this to him? True, he spent time with Harlan learning about mechanical things in the evenings, but he didn’t feel he had neglected her any more than anyone else at Baltac’s. Those who were married enjoyed their married life and all of them had children. Panix would have liked a child, but now he was a cuckold.
He sat downstairs futilely trying to lose himself by reading. Rain streaked the glass of their windows, and, on this restday, Panix attempted to take advantage of the inclement weather by reading a history of Sulliana. He couldn’t concentrate on the book and found his eyes wandering up from the print and gazing at nothing, waiting for her. When he heard Merra descend down the stairs, the clock had barely struck noon.
He centered himself as she walked into the room. “Where were you last night?” Panix said, keeping his voice low and calm.
“I was here all night. How could you think otherwise?”
“You have South Pent wine on your breath. We have none in the house.” Panix noticed his stomach beginning to churn. He could sense emotional thunderclouds rising between them. He couldn’t control his feelings. The house shivered. “Have you been seeing someone else? It’s been some time since you showed me any real affection.”
“No.” Merra colored.
“I know you’re lying, Merra. Tell me the truth.”
She paced the room, fiddling with her fingers. She shook out that long golden hair that once so enthralled Panix. “All right.” She sat down on the window seat and looked out the window at the rain for a moment collecting her thoughts. “I was going to tell you by next Restday anyway. I’m in love with Baston Blox. I’m leaving you to live with him.”
“Live with him? He’s married.” Panix couldn’t believe his ears.
“I shal
l be his mistress.”
“You mean you are already,” Panix said with a flat tone in his voice, but he felt like exploding.
“Yes, if you must know,” she said and turned from the window and looked at him with narrowed eyes. “I hate you and all you stand for. All that magic you have bottled up inside you.”
She stood up and paced the room. Panix noticed she stayed as far away from him as she could. “Baston is a true Pent and has no talent. He sees me for my beauty. He doesn’t care if I don’t have a lot of magical talent. There is no place for magic in his life.” She took a deep breath and nearly whispered, “nor in mine.”
“What?” Panix said. “I don’t care about your magic. You haven’t done much more than make airlights since we came to Pent. I’m the one who works magic in our garden, not you. I’ve always treasured your beauty. And for all I’ve given you I get this? You don’t think I’ve loved you all this time?”
“You’ve never loved me like I need to be loved and you never will. I am sick of your nobility and your forbearance. That’s why I wouldn’t permit children.” Her hand went to her mouth.
“Wouldn’t permit what?” Panix couldn’t believe what he heard. The house shuddered.
“The one useful magical talent I have is that I don’t have to get pregnant if I don’t want to. And I have chosen not to. It has made this step I’m taking so much easier.”
“Without talking to me about it? I’m your husband,” he said with the sinking feeling his life was about to irretrievably change.
“Was. I don’t want any children with magic. I don’t want children at all.” She stood by the window and turned to look at Panix.
No tears in her eyes, no remorse. There were tears in his eyes and a cold anger that filled his soul. He used his magic for the first time ever to gauge her feelings and knew she was lost to him. His book dropped to the floor as he rose from his chair.
The anger billowed up unbidden. It sent a shockwave through the house, rattling windows and doors. He didn’t notice the crash of dishes and glasses falling from their shelves. Hardly able to see through his rage, he left, slamming the door, oblivious to the rain.