by Yvonne Heidt
Natalie immediately felt butterflies in her stomach. She was excited to see Van. Yes, she could put this on the back burner for tonight.
Tonight, she was going to explore new possibilities.
*
Get a grip! You’re thirty-two, not fourteen! Natalie heard the front door slam and the sound of feet running up the stairs and down the hall. Mary burst in her room without bothering to knock.
“Am I too late? Do you have any idea what it’s like to take thirty-five teenagers to the museum? Fricking teenagers can drive a sane woman to drink. What are you going to wear? Are you going to kiss her?”
Natalie grabbed Mary by the arms. “It’s all about me right this second, Mare. Help me. What does one wear on a first date? It’s hardly fair. I haven’t been on a date in thirteen years, and even back then I never cared what I wore. What if I commit some horrible lesbian faux pas on my first date with a woman?”
Mary started to laugh, but cut it off abruptly when Natalie glared at her. “What do you have?”
Natalie flung her arm toward the bed. It was covered in a pile nearly two feet deep. “Every piece of clothing that I own is on that bed. I’ve tried it all on. None of my clothes look right.”
“Nat? You better think of something, because she’s here and you’re in your underwear.” Mary looked over to her. “Nice fancy underwear, I might add, yet nonetheless, not appropriate for dinner wear.”
“I think I’m going to throw up.” Natalie bent over and put a hand over her stomach. “I’m so nervous. What’s she wearing?”
Mary gave a little wave out the window. “Black 501s, with a black short sleeved shirt tucked in. Oh, and she’s wearing shit kickers. Damn, girl, if I weren’t straight, I’d want her. She’s hot!”
Natalie groaned and dove back into the mess on the bed. Mary hurried over to help and finally held up a green Gypsy-style summer dress that laced up the front.
“Matches your eyes, easy on hers, it’s perfect.” She left the room to answer the front door.
Twenty minutes later, Natalie headed for the voices in the kitchen. She took a deep breath, smoothed her hair, and breezed in the door. “Sorry I kept you waiting.” She was so nervous, her heart thumped almost painfully.
Van was sitting in one of the kitchen chairs with her long legs straight out in front of her. “You look great.”
Two hours straightening my hair and doing my makeup. But wasn’t that look just worth it. “Thank you, Van. So do you.”
Van smiled. “Thanks. I was just getting ready to tell your mother and Mary that one of my ancestors worked here when the house was originally built.”
Natalie saw her mother’s eyebrows rise and jumped in. “Wow. In all the excitement around here, did I forget to mention that?”
“What excitement?” Van asked.
“The house is haunted,” Mary blurted.
Natalie winced inwardly. Great, now Van would think she was nuts. She looked anxiously over to see her reaction.
“Really?” Van looked around the kitchen. “I’ve heard the rumors. What’s going on?”
“You’re not surprised?” asked Natalie.
Van laughed. “Hey, I watch Ghost Adventures.”
Natalie was grateful for the humor. She didn’t want to talk about it anymore today. She was nervous enough as it was. “Shall we?” she asked Van then caught herself from sighing when she stood up next to her. She felt her nerve endings fire up and a skip in her pulse. She could only hope she didn’t make an ass of herself tonight.
Van led Natalie to the truck and admired how amazing she looked in that dress. She no longer questioned her motive for asking her out. She looked delicious.
“There’s no graceful way to do this in a dress. Is there?” Natalie asked when she stood in front of the high cab.
“Nope.” Van chuckled. “Pretty much, none.” She helped Natalie up and then went around and jumped in the driver’s side. “I hope you like seafood. My uncle’s family owns a restaurant on the boardwalk. Are you okay with that?”
“I love seafood. I’m sure it will be wonderful.”
During the short ride down the coast, Van was quiet but kept darting glances over at Natalie. She looked adorable sitting there with her hands folded primly in her lap. When she realized that Natalie seemed to be waiting for her to talk, Van searched for her long-dormant flirting skills. She hadn’t needed them for a long time. “I love your work,” she said finally.
Natalie smiled. “Thank you. Did you visit the Web page?”
Van nodded. “Here we are.” She pulled smoothly into the crowded parking lot of the restaurant.
“Which-fish?” asked Natalie.
Van chuckled. “Uncle John couldn’t decide on a name for the first year. He would just shout out, ‘Which fish do you want?’ So my aunt had a sign made. Over the years, the place became so popular that they expanded and dispensed with the counter. The name stuck, though.”
Van helped Natalie step down and felt her slight tremble. It touched her. Then it dawned on her that this was a real date. She’d grown so used to casual pick-ups and booty calls that only required small talk that she didn’t know quite what to think at the moment. And when Natalie smiled at her, she lost the ability to think much at all.
“Vanessa!” her uncle’s voice boomed from right next to her. “It’s so good to see you.” Van turned to warn Natalie, but she was too slow. Her uncle was already pumping her arm in his naturally exuberant way.
“And who is this?”
“Natalie, this is my uncle, John.” The words were hardly out of her mouth before Van was engulfed in a bear hug before he stood back and beamed at her.
“It’s been a long time since you’ve brought a friend. Go and sit at the family table.” He pointed outside to the large deck behind the wall of windows in the back. “Your aunt will be so happy to see you.”
Van led Natalie to a table overlooking the water. In the center of the weathered wood was a large engraved plaque bearing the name Easton.
“Oh, cute,” Natalie said. “Family table as in literally.”
“My aunt said if they were going to work so hard during meal times, there had to be a permanent table for us. She also said it had to be the best in the house.”
“It’s certainly beautiful here. The sky looks like it’s on fire and getting ready to fall into the ocean.”
Aunt Becky put a basket of French bread in front of them and kissed Van’s cheek before chuckling.
“Don’t tell me,” Van said. “I’ve grown another inch.”
Her aunt laughed and winked at Natalie. “We thought she would never stop growing. She’s taller than both my sons.”
“Meaner too,” said Van.
“Oh, you are not.” Natalie’s eyes widened slightly. “Are you?”
“My cousin Rory certainly thinks so. I broke his nose in the seventh grade.”
“Ryan still insists it was your idea to steal your uncle’s car to go joyriding in.” Her aunt’s tone was teasing.
“Geez,” Van said. “That was more than twenty years ago. Isn’t there some statute of limitations for that?”
Her aunt patted her shoulder. “Absolutely not. I’ll go get your wine.”
“It must have been wonderful to grow up in a large family. Do you have any brothers or sisters?”
“No. My dad has four brothers and three of them have ten kids between them. They all stayed in this area, and me and the cousins grew up together.” Van buttered a piece of the bread and handed it to Natalie. “You?”
“Only child.” Natalie sighed. “I always wanted a sibling.”
“Well, Natalie. The Eastons are legion. If you ever need something built, need a cop, a priest, or if you’re hungry, we are your go-tos.”
“What about a landscaper?” Natalie teased. “Who do I call?”
Van winked at her. “That, you already have.” She realized how much she was enjoying the flirtation and she felt a small twinge of guilt. The whole pu
rpose of bringing Natalie to the family restaurant was for the buffer she thought it would create. She anticipated the interruptions, thinking that they would keep things from getting too intimate. Natalie laughed at something Uncle John said. Van hadn’t considered beforehand how easily Natalie would fit in.
“They like you,” she said when her aunt left for the third time. Van felt a knock in her chest when Natalie locked eyes with her. The red sunset behind her had faded into an indigo dusk and the candles flickered soft light on her face.
“I’m having a wonderful time, Van.” Natalie looked down and Van could see the blush stain her cheeks.
She reached out and took her hand. “What are we doing here, Natalie?” Van was insanely attracted to her, but feeling what she considered to be very dangerous emotions. Ones that she’d buried a long time ago. Van had always been very honest with the women she took home with her: her heart was off-limits.
Natalie sat back and neatly put the napkin on her plate. “That was amazing. I’m so full. Can we go for a walk on the beach?”
Van smiled. “Of course. Let’s go say good-bye first, or I’ll never hear the end of it.”
They used the steps from the rear deck to access the sandy beach. Natalie admired the flowers spilling out of cobalt blue planters. The rhythm of the waves and the lights of the boardwalk gave the beach a magical feeling to her. She knew she would remember this night forever.
She took off her heels and stood on the bottom step, which put her at Van’s eye level. She stared at her lips. Were they as soft as they looked? Natalie held very still and the desire she saw mirrored in Van’s eyes quickened her pulse. She was finding it difficult to breathe normally. Anticipation seemed to close her throat and she couldn’t find any words. The emotion was so intense; she closed her eyes for a second.
Van gently pressed her lips against hers and Natalie’s immediate reaction was, yes, they were as soft as they looked. Then Van wrapped her arms around her and Natalie felt the heat of the full body contact. She heard herself whimper, and her knees went weak. She tightened her grip on Van’s shoulders.
It was Van who broke the kiss first and she laid her forehead against Natalie’s, her breath a hot caress on Natalie’s cheek. It was the most spectacular kiss she’d ever had. She could feel her heart knock against Van’s breasts which were pressed into her own.
Natalie felt shy but not awkward. Kissing Van felt like the most natural thing in the world.
Van lifted Natalie off the step, into the soft sand, and took her hand. Van hadn’t expected that kiss would shake her up the way it did. The emotion that welled up in her chest surprised her. She’d felt her heart rattle the cage she’d carefully built around it. Instinct had her stepping back a little. She needed some space, and hearing Natalie’s story could provide that.
Natalie hadn’t spoken yet. It wasn’t until they reached the water’s edge that Van asked her. “Why are you here?”
“Here with you, or here in Bayside?”
Van shrugged. “Both.”
“Do you want the whole story or the abridged version?”
“Whichever you want to tell me.”
Natalie sighed. “I’m not going to go into great detail about my divorce just yet. Suffice it to say that it was the reason I moved here. This evening has been perfect and we’ll leave details for another time.”
Van nodded.
“I’m here with you because I want to be.”
The answer was so matter-of-fact and honest that Van decided to be direct. “Are you a lesbian, Natalie?”
“I’m pretty certain I am.”
Natalie looked so shy Van softened her approach and whispered in her ear. “Have you ever made love with another woman?”
“Well, not technically.”
Van chuckled. “What exactly does that mean?”
This time it was Natalie who stepped back. “Okay. I’ll tell you the whole story. It only makes sense when it’s all put together in context.”
They walked along the water and Van listened as Natalie talked. She didn’t interrupt her while she told her about her life with Jason. Van’s mind raced with the implications of a rebound relationship. Then she caught herself. When did that start to matter? When had her mind gone to relationship status? Somewhere over the shrimp cocktail?
When Natalie was done, Van tilted her chin up. “Let me get this straight. You were married to an asshole who called you frigid for twelve years. Then you move here where you started to have sexy dreams about making love with women and decided you’re a lesbian.”
Natalie blushed. “Well, yes.”
“And you want me to be your first lover?” Van hesitated when she felt a tug over her heart. Natalie was sweet and looked gorgeous in the moonlight. She didn’t know if she would be able to walk away from her after she made love to her. Being someone’s first was a huge responsibility, and she already cared enough about Natalie to not want to hurt her. Van needed to walk away now. She wanted to tell her that they could be friends, she really did. But what came out of her mouth was completely different. “So, Natalie, do you want to come home with me?”
*
Natalie leaned against the closed door and tried not to feel stupid. She just had the best date in her life with the gorgeous Van, whom she was fiercely attracted to. Oh, and a kiss that rocked her world, let’s not forget that.
“So, Natalie, do you want to come home with me?”
She wanted to do just that. But what did she do instead? She looked straight into Van’s eyes and froze. Jason’s ugly words came out of nowhere to slap her. Frigid.
Natalie knew her body was telling her the complete opposite, but to erase something that had been a huge part of her identity for her entire adult life was at the very least, difficult. She felt a piece of her would die if she went home with Van and saw disappointment, or worse, regret, in her face the next morning.
Van took her refusal seemingly in stride and was pleasant to her on the way home. The kiss she gave Natalie on the cheek was a friendly one, giving no hint of the passion they had felt earlier.
Natalie went to her room, stepping quietly through the hall so as not to wake her sleeping mother and got ready for bed.
She lay still but her emotions wouldn’t settle and her mind raced with alternate scenarios that could have played out, but didn’t. She felt the threat of tears burning behind her eyes.
What if Van didn’t want to go out with her again? Natalie didn’t know if her heart could take another rejection.
As she slipped into a dream state, Natalie became conscious she was running. While she sped down the hallway, it seemed to extend itself, the stairway slipping farther and farther away. The only sound she could hear was the echo of solid footsteps behind her. Even those sounded far away as her heavy breathing and heartbeat pounded in her eardrums. She could see Beth running beside her in slow motion, terror etched in her face as she looked back.
“Go ahead and run, you stupid little bitch. I’ll catch you. You’re going to wish you hadn’t.”
Chapter Eleven
Van felt completely useless this morning. She couldn’t concentrate. Maybe she should go out with a work crew to get her mind on the job and off of Natalie and the abrupt ending of their date last night. She headed outside intending to do just that, but jumped into her truck instead. Van turned into the now familiar driveway then dialed her phone.
“Hello?”
“Natalie?”
“Yes. Who’s calling please?”
God, she had a sexy voice. “It’s Van. Did I wake you?”
“No.”
“I called to see if you would have coffee with me this morning.”
“I would love to. What time?”
“Great. Open your front door.” She snapped her phone closed.
“You have me at a slight disadvantage here.” Natalie gestured to her rumpled nightshirt and messy hair.
Van thought she looked adorable. She wanted to pick her up and crawl b
ack in bed with her. “You look beautiful in the morning.” She stopped and sniffed the air. “Is that pot I smell?”
“What?” Natalie shook her head and laughed. “No, it’s sage. We were doing a house cleansing.”
Van saw Natalie’s mother in the hallway holding an abalone shell and large feather. She smiled at her before disappearing into the hall. She pulled Natalie into a hug and kissed her. “Good morning.”
“Mmm. Good morning. Are you hungry? My mother made muffins.”
“Muffins and ghost chasing? You’ve been busy. I’ve already eaten.” She sat at the table, accepted the coffee cup and stared at her over the rim. The air sizzled and her stomach muscles tightened when Natalie nervously licked her lips. “I’m sorry that I came on so strong last night.”
“God. It wasn’t you. Please don’t think it was you.” Natalie stood next to her and Van pulled her into her lap. She fit perfectly and Van couldn’t resist nuzzling her neck.
“I thought you wouldn’t want to see me again,” Natalie said.
“Oh, I want to see you, little one.” I want to see every inch of you.
Natalie smiled. “I’m so glad that you do.” Her mother came into the kitchen and turned back around. “Come back here, Mom.”
Van was sorry when Natalie stood. Her legs burned from the contact and her jeans felt too tight.
“I don’t want to interrupt anything.” Natalie’s mother put the shell and feather on the table. “But I’m all done.”
Van was going to ask about the cleansing but a voice erupted from her hip.
“That sounds familiar, what’s the title of that tune?”
“Take this job and shove it.”
Natalie laughed. “You did not.”
“It’s the foreman on my crew, Rick. I have to take this. Excuse me.”
Natalie watched her leave the room.
“You’re staring at her ass.”
“Mother!”
“Well, you are. Just saying.” Her mother laughed.
The moment felt almost surreal. Never in a million years did Natalie think she would be discussing the finer aspects of such a lovely female ass with her mother. “Okay, I was.”