If it were up to me, I would insist she leave her office right that instant and come home with me. I didn’t forget that she had that meeting later today. As much as I would have much rather lock her up in my bedroom for the rest of the day, I knew that wouldn’t be a possibility.
“Not yet,” she said with her head resting on my chest.
I leaned my chin on the top of her head and breathed in her sweet scent. I had been wild dreaming about this woman over the years. I had always figured if I ever had her again it would settle the matter. Like it was a thirst that only needed to be quenched once.
It wasn’t something that I was ever going to have enough of now that I had tasted her again. Finally she leaned back from me and I reluctantly released her. She slipped off the desk to collect and replace her clothes.
I looked over her desk and noticed a single picture frame. I turned it with trepidation. This is the moment I had wanted at the beginning of all of this. It had to be a picture of her daughter.
Sure enough it was. It looked like a school photo, and I guessed from a few years earlier. Aria looked to be five or six in it. One of her front teeth was missing and she was giving a big happy grin. What was unmistakable was the two pitch black ponytails with bows.
“This your daughter,” I said staring down at the picture.
“Yeah,” Lilly said taking it from my hand quickly and looking at it herself fondly. “It was a couple years back. I should really put the new one in. All kids look so alike when they are little and still have that baby fat.”
I looked at the picture in her hand. Was she trying to convince me that that similarities I saw were just happenstance? Maybe it was because the idea had already been planted in my head, but I was sure now, looking on the face of that little girl that she had to be mine.
“Is the father still around?” I asked as I took a seat in one of the two leather chairs that faced her desk. Instead of going behind her desk, Lilly took the other one next to me. She set the picture frame back in place facing away from us before tucking her feet under her.
“Um, no.”
“That’s too bad. Did he move away or something?”
I hated that I was prying but now more then ever I wanted to hear her tell me the words.
“He was in the Navy. A SEAL actually. He died while he was deployed though. Before Aria was born so…”
I could see the nervousness in her words. It was hard to tell if it was hurt or because she was making it up.
“I’m so sorry to hear that,” I responded. “That must have been so hard for you to lose him.”
"We didn’t really know each other. He was deployed before I even knew I was pregnant.”
“Did you tell him though?”
“No,” she shifted awkwardly in her seat. “It all happened really quickly. But I was fine with taking care of Aria on my own. I mean, I know it’s not the perfect situation but we do alright.”
“Yeah, I see that.” I said waving around to the office. “You must be a bigger deal then you made yourself out to be,” I teased.
“No, not at all,” she laughed and brushed her hair back. “But we get by.”
I thought on that as I made my way back to the office. I had no plans to return, but knew I probably should. If I was lucky, the rest of the staff would have taken off leaving me alone to work and think in some peace and quiet.
I was troubled by what Lilly had said. It wasn’t that I didn’t believe her or worry about them financially. Lilly had clearly been a trooper putting the need of her daughter before everything else.
What plagued my mind was the fact that she shouldn’t have done it all on her own. Of course I repeated over again to myself there was no way I could have know she was pregnant and she had no way to tell me.
It wasn’t how I had wanted to end things eight years ago. After a meeting like that I had hoped that we could have actually started something. Lilly had blown out of that VIP room as fast as she had blown into my life.
I wonder if some part of me had known out in the universe there was my child, that she was the mother. Why else would I have attached myself so much to the memory of Lilly over all these years.
If I was truly being honest with myself, that memory of our night together had been an excuse for me never to start another relationship. Every time I even tried, all I did was compare the woman before me to the one I had known so briefly. The one that was gone in the blink of an eye.
I wasn’t the kind to believe in fate or coincidences. That never sat right with me when I went to these country where children starved to death on the street and people died from treatable diseases.
I had to believe now, though, that something had connected me to Lilly, and something had called her back to me all these years later. I wasn’t willing to give this chance up again. She could simply skate out of my life in an instant and I would regret it for a lifetime.
“Oh you came back,” a voice called into my office waking me from my thoughts.
I looked up to see Helen poking her brunette head in.
“Yeah, I just had some things I needed to finish up.”
“What about the emergency?”
“The what? Oh that. Yeah, I got it all squared away.”
“Is there something wrong?” she asked sense that I was more distant than usual.
I rotated in my chair to face her. She may have been annoyingly flirtations at times but she was a good employee and at least caring.
“Can I ask you something, actually?”
“Sure,” she said her face lighting up and stepping into the room.
“Why do women insist on keeping secrets? Even when they don’t have to? I mean, even when the truth is so obvious and they should jut come out and say it?”
She raised a brow looking at me surprised by my question. Maybe she was hoping I would ask her out or something.
“Well,” she said slowly trying to think through the jumble of words I just spit out. “It’s my experience that if a woman is keeping a secret from you it’s because she is afraid.”
“Afraid. That doesn’t make any sense?”
I was frustrated and unconsciously pushed at my sleeves already up at my elbow as I searched understanding out of my brain.
“Well, when a girl gets hurt in the past, that makes her want to close off. Keep everything close. Saves her from getting hurt all over again. People keep secrets because they don’t fear the truth coming out but the pitfall of it.”
I nodded in understanding.
“Thanks,” I said with a half smile.
“Happy to help,” she responded before bidding be goodbye for the night.
Lilly might have been the one to slip out on me that night, but I had unknowingly abandon her these last eight years.
Maybe she was keeping the truth to herself because she feared my reaction. After all we may have had hot attraction to each other but we had only know each other a few days. i doubted she couldn’t imagine how much I desired to be apart of her life and have a place in Aria’s too.
I would need to find a way to show her that she was safe with me. That I wouldn’t turn and disappear again. That she didn’t have to do it all on her own now. I could be there to help her and see her through it all thick and thin.
Chapter Seventeen
Lilly
I was already excited merely for the fact that I would be having a second date with Dr. Dreamy as Em and I started to call him. Emma had agreed that after I picked Aria up from school today, she would watch her for the night.
She couldn’t believe the shock when she came from her lunch meeting to find a large two dozen rose bouquet on her desk.
“Someone must have an admirer,” Julie, my secretary said. “Was it the hunk that came by yesterday?”
“Maybe,” I said blushing profusely.
“It’s about time you got some action.”
Lilly thought to tell her she got plenty of that on her desk yesterday. Instead she shut her door to
read over the small note in privacy.
“Thinking about you all night. Can’t wait to see you again. I’m all yours, baby.”
She smiled as she read over the note again. He had been nothing but perfect to her. Naturally she knew that no one was actually perfect, but right now he seemed about as close as someone could get. She looked down to the framed picture of Aria on her desk and wave of guilt hit her again.
I needed to tell Barrett the truth. I needed to give him that option to stay or not. I would be sure that today would be the day that I told him.
After work I waited in the same school line to pick up Aria. When she slipped into the back seat I couldn’t help but look at her more loving than ever before. She did have so much of her father in her.
“Aunt Em is going to come over tonight and watch you again. Is that okay?”
“But I have my show tomorrow?” Aria retorted.
“I know. Don’t worry, I didn’t forget.”
“Are you going on a date with that same guy?” Aria asked tentatively.
“Yes. His name is Barrett.” I paused for a beat before adding, “Are you okay with that?”
For a girl whose mother never went on dates two in two weeks time probably seemed excessive.
“I guess, it’s just that…”
“Just what, honey?” I asked stealing a glance in the rear view mirror as we started to head home.
“Do you ever think about my dad?”
“What do you mean?” I asked as my heart hit the pit of my stomach. Was she on to the truth maybe? Or was she afraid that I was forgetting about a father she thought she had but didn’t really exist.
“I just mean most kids, even if their parents are divorced or whatever they still know about their dad.”
“But that wasn’t the case, honey. You know that,” I said piling another brick on top of the long wall of lies.
“Yeah, but how come you don’t ever talk about him? Or why have I never seen a picture of him? I mean he had to have parents right. Why don’t I at least know my grandparents?”
It was a lot of questions that I couldn’t answer. I knew the day would come when all the dots would start to come together for her and she would realize how much it didn’t add up.
“It’s really complicated. But, I don’t want you to think that going out with Barrett diminishes your father to me. He gave me the greatest gift in the world, you. And no matter what, I will always love him for that.”
It was completely honest but also the closest I could come to telling her the truth right now. She slumped back in her chair not entirely happy with it.
"I don’t have to go tonight,” I said realizing the needs of my child came before mine.
“No, I don’t mind if you want to go out. I’ll have fun with Aunt Em anyway,” she added in a more upbeat tone.
I figured if she wasn’t happy with the answers I made up about her father, at least she was satisfied with knowing she was in for a junk food filled night of fun with Emma.
After dropping off Aria at home under the care of Em I headed back out. I decided this time I would meet Barrett at his work and just get it out before I was too chicken to tell him. I looked down at my dashboard clock, it was almost four thirty now, so he was sure to be on his last few patients. I hoped I wouldn’t be barging in on him.
I got up to the front desk and was surprised to see several people still in the waiting room.
“What’s your name sweetheart,” the middle aged woman with ridiculously long nails said from behind the plexiglass.
“Actually, i don’t have an appointment but I was hoping to see B- Dr. Harris.”
“Sorry, sweetheart we are all booked for the rest of the day. I can make you an appointment for Monday if you would like.”
“No, it’s not that. He is kind of expecting me,” I tried my best to explain. “I mean not really. He doesn’t know I’m here but…”
“Sweetheart,” she said again and it was getting really irritating. “We only have time for booked clients. If it’s an emergency.”
“Yes, that. I have an emergency,” I said latching onto the word. “I need to see him right away.”
“What’s the emergency?”
“I uh…my IUD has fallen out.”
“That’s not really an e-“
“And I’m bleeding…profusely. In fact I already feel a little faint.”
She looked me up and down like she didn’t believe me. Either way I was pretty sure that I claimed a serious enough problem that she would have to let me see him.
“You should have gone to the ER, or called ahead at the very least. I’ll have Helen show you back right away.”
The nurse from the last visit was the one to show me back. She asked me about my symptoms and worst of all if I could show her the IUD.
“Uh, I left it at home,” I stuttered. “I was just so frazzled I didn’t think to bring it.”
Finally after taking copious notes and asking me far more than I had the creativity to make up she left to get the doctor.
It took less then two minutes before Barrett burst through the door face full of worry.
“Lilly, are you alright?” He asked coming over to me. The nurse still hovered in the background.
“Yes, I’m fine. I just needed to see you and they wouldn’t let me back,” I did my best to explain.
I felt bad that I had cause such a scare but it was the only way to see him. If I waited a few hours till tonight there was no way I was going to still have the courage to say what I needed to say.
“It’s alright Helen. You can go. Please tell my next patient I will be just a minute.”
The nurse huffed. Apparently she wasn’t happy to hear that I was fine and had lied my way in. None the less she left the room.
Barrett closed the distance between us in three full steps. Cupping my face he kissed me with urgency.
“I thought something was really wrong. What you described, that is a really big deal.”
“I’m sorry,” I said with all my heart. “I just needed to see you and that receptionist wouldn’t let me past.”
He smiled down at me with humor in his dark eyes.
“Nancy can be a tough cookie,” he agreed. "But next time just call me first and I’ll make sure they let you through.”
“Okay,” I said a little shyly.
He leaned down and kissed me again, this time softly. I was beginning to already melt in my resolve.
“You couldn’t wait for tonight, huh?” Barrett whispered his lips against mine.
Chapter Eighteen
Lilly
“It isn’t that at all,” I playfully slapped his chest.
He rocked his hips pushing his erection against me. He was ready for me right now. Maybe it was the look of worry on his face earlier, but I had a sudden desire to touch every hard part of his body with my own.
“Then what?” he said turning to nibbled down the side of my neck and along my ear.
“I just wanted to thank you for the flowers, is all.”
I was trying my best to stay focused but with Barrett’s arms around me the rest of the world seemed to blur.
"Are you sure your not here for another examination,” he teased next to my ear.
I gasped like I was shocked with the words.
“I bet you say that to all your patients.”
“Oh yeah, Mrs. Wrinket, the lady I saw before I came in. She was begging for it. Mind you she is about seventy and arthritic so I couldn’t in good conscience risk injuring her. But you…”
He pushed me back and lifted me on top of the papered table.
“You are a terrible creep” I giggled as he pulled his lab coat off and came down to kiss my neck again.
“Oh baby, you have no idea,” he moaned as his hands felt their way up my skirt.
His touch sent me on fire. We were both hunger with need and short on time. Quietly we both ripped off the clothes needed to give the other access. I helped him unzip his pant
s and pulled his slick dick out myself.
I stroked it's hard shaft a few times, while Barrett stood before me relishing the touch. We had tone quick though who knew if the nurse was going to barge back in.
He drove hard into me with my moans mingled with the crinkling of sterilized paper under me. He gripped my hips and drove into hard again.
Lifting me up off the table he spun me around so that I was lying chest down. I felt him kick my legs further apart before he dove into me again. I turned my head to the paper and gave a whimper of satisfaction.
We were both full of need and no amount of plunging his hard dick into seemed to satisfy it. I could fell him flip up my dress to expose my bare ass to him as he continued his pace of thrusting into me.
He reached forward and grabbed my hair as I arched my back in satisfaction.
“Yes, Lilly. I wanna hear you,” he ordered in a husky voice.
His hand at my hip started to make its way down and alongside one butt cheek before it snaked its way between them.
“You're so tight baby, I want to feel you here too,” he said as he plunged his finger in my asshole.
I gasped as the sensation shot through me. Over and over again he dipped his finger in and out of my backside keeping to the rhythmic of his thrusting. With each dip he took his finger a little farther.
“I’m going to cum, baby. I want you to cum with me,” he ordered again.
I was more than happy to oblige. I was so close to the edge of my own sanity I wasn’t even sure I could have stopped myself if I wanted too.
I felt him spin his finger around my hole as I came in a rush of juices. He stilled his thrusting behind me as I felt his member quake from deep within. He held me there while he released deep inside me before slowly sliding out and turning me around to face him.
It only too a second for the two of us to put ourselves right again.
“We’ve got to stop meeting like this,” I said shyly as I straightened my dress.
“Oh hell no,” Barrett said looked down on me with love and excitement over what we just did.
Her Pleasure Warrior_A Military Romance Page 21