by Charis Marsh
During a “just move across the floor concentrating on your feet, don’t hurry, move at your own pace” exercise, Alexandra looked at the clock for the twentieth time and noticed that the hands had actually moved. “Look!” she whispered excitedly to Tristan. “We’re finished soon!”
“Thank god,” Tristan whispered back. “I was that close to just running out the door when she was telling me to just ‘be the deer’!”
“Everyone, come and sit down,” said Sequoia. “Let your breath slowly return.”
“We weren’t doing anything! My breath is intact!” Alexandra complained to Tristan.
“Please do not to talk during class,” Sequoia said, a slight frown creasing her brow. “It is disrespectful to your classmates. Now, I believe that in order to become a successful dancer, you must know yourself. When I say successful dancer, I do not mean one that is successful in the eyes of teachers or judges. I mean someone who knows themselves so completely, that they can transcend their body to connect with an audience. To be able to accomplish this is to be a truly great dancer. When you dance, you should feel goosebumps on your arms. It is only when you have really come out of yourself that you have truly experienced what it is to dance.” Alexandra tried to smother a yawn. “During this class, I feel that I have really been able to get to know the real you, so I am going to attempt to act as a mirror, and show you bits of yourself that you may not have known before. What’s your name?” Sequoia asked Tristan.
“Ah … Tristan?”
“Now, that’s interesting, Tristan. Did you notice that you just said your name as a question? Are you quite sure that your name is Tristan?”
“Yes, my name is Tristan,” Tristan said, a bit confused and annoyed.
“That’s much better, Tristan! Now, Tristan, I want you to just close your eyes and think. I want you to imagine that a fly is coming to rest on your head. Swat it away. Good, good, that’s very good. Now stand up … and then put all your weight on one leg. Good! You can open your eyes now.”
“Great,” Tristan answered sarcastically.
“Now, Tristan,” Sequoia said with an understanding smile, “if you were angry with me right now, would you most want to punch me or call me names?”
“Call you names,” Tristan answered without hesitation. Delilah giggled.
“Ah, I think you are not in touch enough with your masculine side. You are really going to have to work on that to become more well-rounded.” Tristan looked at her in disbelief, and everyone started to giggle. “Might I suggest maybe focusing on some pursuits that bring out your manly side?” Sequoia was apparently oblivious to the class’s reaction. “Maybe try some baseball or soccer … you know, even just doing some extra math might help.”
Alexandra raised her hand to her mouth, trying not to laugh.
“Oh my God, do you believe that woman?” Tristan said angrily as they walked down the stairs after class. “Like, does she even know what gay means?”
“No, I don’t think she does,” Alexandra laughed.
“Even I know what gay means, and I’m Japanese,” Kageki said in disgust.
“I am so not taking that class again,” Tristan jumped into the lost and found bin. Taking a lost doll out, he held in front of his face. “I think you need to get in touch with your masculine side,” he said in a high-pitched voice, imitating Sequoia.
“And Mrs. Demidovski said we had to tell everyone to come to this class.” Delilah shook her head scornfully. “As if!”
“Yeah! Yeah right!” Tristan stuffed the doll violently back in the lost and found.
“Hey, Tristan,” said Alexandra, doing up her shoes, “do you want to come with Grace, Anna, and me? We’re going shopping.”
“Where?” Tristan brightened up.
“Robson, duh!”
“That sounds like fun …” Delilah hinted. Alexandra and Tristan ignored her.
“Oh, Lexi,” Grace said, “I think I’m actually going to just go home? I’m kind of tired. Anna, we can still hang out though, if you want. We’ve been planning this for such a long time. Do you want to come sleep over?”
“Sure,” Anna grinned at Alexandra.
“Well, do you still want to go?” Alexandra asked Tristan, trying to keep the anger out of her voice. Glancing over at Delilah, Alexandra added, “You can come, too, if you want.”
“Sure!” Delilah said happily.
“That sounds fun,” Tristan smirked at Alexandra, who was watching Grace and Anna leave. She looked nauseated.
“So, what’s the new guy like?” Alexandra asked as they waited for the bus. She suddenly remembered how little sleep she had gotten the night before, and yawned.
“Oh, Jules? He’s really cool, and nice,” said Tristan enthusiastically. Alexandra looked at him sharply. “He homestays at Mr. Yu’s. I went over there yesterday. We had a lot of fun, except it was laundry day, so nobody was supposed to come over. I tried hiding in Keiko ’s closet every time Mr. Yu came by, ’cause me, Jules, and Keiko were playing cards in her room, but then he heard my voice, and he was like ‘Wazzat? Who there?’ and so he gave me a lecture and hit me with the broom. It was fun though.”
“Jules sounds nice,” Alexandra said neutrally. “He seems straight, is he?”
“Oh, I don’t know.”
“He is definitely straight,” Delilah said, giggling. “He couldn’t be that clueless and be gay.” Tristan glared at her, annoyed.
“Some people are gay and clueless,” he said. “And it’s okay that he’s clueless, because he’s kind of smart.”
“It doesn’t really matter, right?” Alexandra said firmly as they got on the bus. “Where do you want to go first? We don’t have loads of time.”
“Zara,” said Tristan. “No, wait, H&M. It’s closer if we’re taking this bus.”
“’Kay,” said Alexandra. “Sounds good to me.”
“Yeah, me too,” said Delilah. “But can we stop by the gelato place after? I’m starving.”
“Sure. I haven’t been there in a long time,” said Alexandra. They got off the bus and started walking to H&M. “I love being downtown at this time of day. It’s so happy, you know? Full of tourists who just had a long day and are wandering around relaxing, and the druggies haven’t come out in full force yet.”
“Yeah, okay, Lexi,” Tristan said, laughing. “But no, you’re right, it is nice wandering around down here this time of day.”
“Um, yeah,” said Delilah, staring in disgust at a man who was relieving himself in an alley. “It kind of depends on where downtown, don’tcha think? Like, more there than here,” she pointed up the street to where H&M was and walked quickly. Tristan and Alexandra laughed and followed her.
Later, as they walked into Mondo Gelato, Tristan and Delilah were arguing. “I just don’t like them, okay?” Tristan said firmly.
“Why?” demanded Delilah. “Look, they are sooooo cute!”
“I don’t like the shoes. They’re ugly,” repeated Tristan for the third time.
Ignoring them both, Alexandra went up to the counter and looked. Half blueberry sorbet, half pineapple, she decided. That was what she always got.
“May I try the strawberry sorbet?” Alexandra asked the server. “And then the mango, and then the mint? Thanks.… Actually, can I have one scoop in a cup, half blueberry sorbet, half…” Oh why not be different for once, she thought recklessly, “banana sorbet?”
“Sure,” the server said, laughing slightly.
“It’s a gelato place,” Delilah said when they all had their orders and were sitting at a table outside. “How come you two both ordered sorbet?”
“It’s better for you. It has less calories,” Alexandra and Tristan answered at the same time.
“Jinx, give me a Coca-Cola!” Alexandra laughed. They finished their desserts slowly as it got dark, and then started walking back down Robson.
“Oh, look, it’s the mime dude!” Delilah said excitedly.
“Delilah, that guy is here all the t
ime, we can watch another day,” Alexandra said, stopping to watch nonetheless. They laughed as a Japanese tourist jumped back — the mime was pretending to try and kiss her. Then he turned around and had a fake fight with her boyfriend, who couldn’t stop laughing.
“Okay, we totally have to go, like, now,” said Tristan. “Lexi, is your mom picking you up?”
“No, my dad. I phoned him while you two were arguing over the shoes. He’s going to meet me in front of Le Château and Bebe. Do you need a ride?”
“Yes, please.”
“I can bus,” Delilah said, but Alexandra ignored her.
“Good, that’s fine then,” Tristan answered for her.
“Hey, Tristan,” said Peter Dunstan as they got in the back of the car. “Am I driving you home?”
“Yes, please,” Tristan said, grinning.
“Did you have dinner, Lexi?” Peter asked as he drove.
“Um, no. But we had a lot of junk, so I’m not really hungry.”
Tristan stared at her and mouthed, “We just had sorbet.”
Miming a slit throat, Alexandra mouthed back, “I’m not hungry, and they’re annoying.” Tristan nodded. They spent the rest of the car ride imitating Sequoia for both Peter’s and their own amusement.
As they got out of the car, Peter said, “Are you okay, Lexi? You don’t look so well.”
“I’m fine, Dad,” Alexandra replied angrily. “I’m just tired. I couldn’t sleep last night.”
As she walked up the steps and into the house, Alexandra felt like crying. Emma ran up to her excitedly.
“Lexi, guess what? My teacher is taking us all to the pool on Friday, because we were really well behaved this week!”
“Cool,” said Alexandra impatiently.
“She already ate downtown, with her friend Tristan,” Peter called to Beth.
“Who?”
“Tristan,” Peter said in his normal voice, as Beth walked out of the kitchen. “You know, the tall, skinny one.”
“They’re all tall and skinny,” Beth said, laughing. “Lexi, you look tired. Go to sleep early, okay?”
“Okay. I’m just going to do some homework and take a shower first.”
Alexandra went upstairs, moving quickly. She closed the door to her room, threw her bag on the bed, took off her jacket, and fired it after the bag. She began digging through her drawers, and breathed a sigh of relief. The cookie and chocolate bar were both still there. Taking out a pair of pyjamas and a towel, she set them on the bed and unwrapped the chocolate bar, eating it as fast as she could. She wanted to cry. (No, it’s okay, it’s okay, she reminded herself.) Trying to slow down a bit, she also finished the cookie. When she went down the hall to the bathroom, the door was locked.. Oh great, she thought. Emma’s in the bathroom. “Emma, get out of there quickly,” she called through the door. “Please?”
“Okay, okay,” Emma called back. “I’m just brushing my teeth.”
As soon as Emma finished, Alexandra went into the bathroom and locked the door. She started the tap, tested the temperature, and then turned the shower on to muffle the noise. Then, she bent over the toilet and held her hair back to throw up.
In the shower, Alexandra felt her stomach happily. It was the same as before the chocolate and the cookie. She also didn’t feel as panicky or depressed. Feeling along her jaw, she sighed. She had to stop doing this, and just not eat. It was making her face fat. She walked into her room, trying to hold onto the happiness until she could fall asleep, but it didn’t work. Lying under the covers, Alexandra tried to block everything out of her head, but she couldn’t, and she started crying into her pillow. “I hate you, I hate you!” she mouthed angrily into the darkness, not sure who she meant. Eventually, calmed and exhausted from crying, Alexandra fell asleep.
Chapter Four
Julian Reese
They don’t teach us the ABC’s, We play on the hard concrete, All we’ve got is life on the streets, All we’ve got is life on the streets … I want an accent, something non-Canadian.
Julian woke up to his alarm clock for the first time since he had arrived in Vancouver. He got up, glad not to be waking up an hour before the alarm. It was so quiet in his homestay that early. Everyone else got up at around the same time. It wasn’t like his home, where if he got up before anyone else he could just make his breakfast or whatever. Here, he was given breakfast at the time he was supposed to have breakfast, and he was pretty sure that he was not supposed to go wandering about the house when nobody else was up.
Standing up and stretching, he felt his hamstrings wince. He liked Mr. Yu, he was funny, but his classes were hard. He picked up his iPod from under his pillow, where he had put it the night before, and put in the earbuds. Sitting back down on the bed, he scrolled through his playlists. There it is, he thought, clicking on “wake.” He mouthed the words to “Night Train” for the millionth time, laughing at his reflection in the mirror. Axl Rose I am not, he thought as he picked out his clothes.
As he ate his cereal, he listened to Keiko argue with Mr. Yu. “If you want skim milk, I’m not going to waste my money,” said Mr. Yu. “You want skim milk, take this milk, put water in. There, skim milk.”
Julian wished that there was someone in his homestay who went to school with him. But they had all graduated (or, in Keiko’s case, had opted out of senior school, only graduating from middle school in Japan), and were in the youth company at the academy. As he waited for the bus, Julian shivered. Going to school at 6:30 in the morning sucked, but it was the only way to get enough credits to graduate while going to the academy every day. You could have done a distance course, he told himself reproachfully. But no way would that would have gotten done. He began kicking a rock from one foot to the other, distracting himself from the cold and his boredom. “Aaand Beckham goes for the net,” he said under his breath, attempting to hit the bus-stop pole. He missed and the rock shot into the street, where it was run over. Julian looked at it sadly. “Sorry, old fellow,” he whispered, placing his hand on his heart. He looked up the street. The bus was coming.
As Tristan and Julian walked out of school, Julian couldn’t stop laughing. “Did you see Ms. Mullen’s face?”
“Yeah, but she still didn’t give you any marks for it!” Tristan said, laughing at him.
“Oh, who cares!”
“Oh no, there’s the bus! We’ve missed it …”
“No, we haven’t,” Julian said, breaking into a run. “Come on, hurry!”
“We are so not going to make it.” Tristan started running anyway. The bus driver waited for them patiently. They were out of breath as they got on the bus.
“Thanks,” Julian said, smiling at the bus driver.
“Come on, we can sit here,” Tristan called impatiently. “Oh, did you know we have rehearsal today?”
“What?” Julian was confused. He sat down beside Tristan, and Alexandra moved over to make room for him. “I thought we didn’t have rehearsal until tomorrow? It’s always on Saturday, isn’t it?”
“No, we have rehearsal tonight, after class, for Rose and Sugarplum and Arabian leads, and Russian,” Alexandra explained. “No Dmitri yet, though, because they’d have to pay him. It’s leads and corps together that are rehearsing tomorrow.”
“Oh,” said Julian. “Are we going to have time to go home and get dinner?”
“No, there’s only an hour break,” Tristan answered as he wrestled his lunch out of his backpack. “We can go get sushi, though. There’s a really good place right next to the academy.”
“Cool.”
“Do you want to come with us, Lexi?” Tristan asked casually.
“Um, I’ll see okay?” Alexandra answered. “I think I might be going to get dinner with Grace. But I really want sushi, so maybe I’ll come with you anyway.” She shot a glance to the front of the bus, where Anna and Grace were sitting together. She took her juice box out and jabbed the straw in violently.
“Okay, cool,” Tristan said, making an effort not to look
at her.
“Hey, are you guys going to get sushi later?” asked Taylor from the seat in the corner. Julian looked up, surprised.
“Yeah, wanna come?” he asked. Tristan kicked him.
“Where’s Kaitlyn?” Tristan asked Taylor pointedly.
“Oh, she’s sick,” said Taylor happily. “She phoned me last night and asked me to tell everyone that she can’t come in today because she’s, like, sick. I would really like to come. I love sushi.” She smiled brightly at Julian. Tristan groaned and sank into his seat, sprawling his legs into the aisle. Alexandra ignored them and concentrated on her juice box.
As they went into the changing room, Tristan punched Julian on the shoulder. “Ow, what was that for?”
“Getting in touch with my ‘masculine side.’ Why did you have to invite Taylor?” He rummaged through his locker for a clean shirt, picked one up, and smelled it. “Ugh!” he threw it back in and tried another. “I mean, she’s so annoying. It would have been cool with just the three of us.”
“Oh,” said Julian. “Sorry. I didn’t know you didn’t like her. She just seemed like she really wanted to come.”
“Yes, that doesn’t mean you have to invite her!” said Tristan patiently. “And I didn’t say I disliked her. I just said that she was annoying.”
Kageki leisurely wandered into the changing room.
“Where were you?” Tristan asked.
“I missed the bus?”
“Do you—” started Julian.
“Jules, do you have an extra shirt?” Tristan asked quickly, cutting Julian off. Julian gave him an annoyed look.
“No!”
“That’s okay.” Tristan smiled sweetly.
Walking up the stairs, Julian whispered angrily to Tristan, “I thought you and Kageki were tight!”
“We are! That doesn’t mean that the whole school has to come with us. Try to hurry after class, okay? Maybe we can ‘accidentally’ forget that Taylor wanted to come.” Julian sighed.
Upstairs, all the girls were putting on their pointe shoes. “We have Mr. Moretti today, apparently,” Tristan said. “I am too tired for his class today.”