Tabitha shook her head as she watched her father go.
“He’s so cold, Dev,” she said quietly.
“He’ll be okay, babe,” Devlin assured her. “He’s adjusting right now.”
“Adjusting to what?” she asked. “Hating me?”
Devlin gave her a stern look, “He doesn’t hate you, Tabbie. He hates life right now, and he needs to work that out in his head.”
Tabitha looked cynical, then nodded, sighing.
Devlin glanced toward the back of the plane, hoping he was right. He’d never seen Brenden mad at Tabitha to the point of not speaking to her. It was something new. Tabitha had defended her mother against Brenden, and that hadn’t escaped Brenden, even in the face of the attack that had almost killed him. That had been a first, and Devlin wasn’t sure how it would turn out. He didn’t foresee Brenden cutting Tabitha out of his life, she was his life, but things could get worse before they got better. Brenden had a talent for carrying a grudge when he wanted to.
****
A week later, Tabitha was getting more and more worried about her father. He wasn’t resting, and he wasn’t talking to her either. One morning she’d wandered down the hall hearing him tapping away at the computer in his home office. She stuck her head in to see that he was listening to music on his headphones. She waited for him to look up, he did eventually, and immediately his look chilled.
“What?” he asked, his tone anything but warm.
“Have you eaten?” she asked gently.
He looked back at her for a long moment, then shook his head.
“Want me to make us something?” she asked.
“I’m fine,” he replied simply.
“Daddy …” she began, her tone chiding
“I said I’m fine, Tabitha,” he told her, his tone much more stern this time.
“Okay …” she said, her shock at his tone showing, but he didn’t seem to notice at all.
She left the room, not wanting to irritate him any further, but worried to death that he was never going to speak to her again. He’d said very little to her since they’d returned from New York. Any time she’d commented on the fact that the doctors had told him to rest, he merely looked back at her emotionless.
“It’s like he’s shut down,” Tabitha told Devlin later that morning.
They were sitting out on the balcony at the back of his house. He was drinking coffee, and had been reading the paper when she’d walked out onto the deck. He could see that she was very unhappy, so he set aside his paper and held his hand out to her. She took it and he pulled her down to sit next to him on the bench, squeezing her hand gently.
It was so familiar to her, to talk to Devlin when she was down, it never had changed. Even though she was technically an adult now, she still ran to him whenever she needed advice or was worried. It was comforting to her.
“What do you mean shut down, Tabbie?” he asked.
“I mean, he’s like emotionally blocked,” she said, sighing. “He won’t talk to me, he won’t look at me. I don’t understand it,” she said, looking like she was near tears.
“He’s dealing with a lot right now,” Devlin said, smoothing his thumb over her cheek. “Give him a chance to get through it.”
“I know, I know,” she said, nodding, “he’s just never been like this with me before. I’m used to him always being normal with me.”
“Joys of becoming an adult,” Devlin said, grinning. “Now he’s treating you like one.”
“Lucky me,” she said, rolling her eyes.
Devlin grinned.
They spent the rest of the day talking about other things. Devlin, as usual, managed to divert her attention and keep her mind off the problems with her father. She loved him for that. That evening they talked about what to do about dinner.
“I should go home and make sure he’s actually eating,” she said.
“Maybe we should both go, and that way if he yells at you, I can kick his ass,” Devlin said, grinning.
“You’d do it too, wouldn’t you?” she asked, grinning.
“At this point, I think he might need it,” he told her.
She sighed. “I think what he needs is a good swift kick in the ass.”
“I can provide that too,” he said. “Although, honestly, babe, I think fate is kicking his ass right now, pretty good.”
“Have you heard back from his lawyer yet?” Tabitha asked.
Devlin had told her about the call from Angelica Benita. Unfortunately, Tabitha knew even less about BJ’s finances than Devlin, but she’d agreed that Devlin should get ahold of BJ’s lawyer and see what they could find out. Devlin had called the man just before they’d left New York, leaving a message with his secretary.
“You know, I haven’t,” Devlin said, picking up his cell phone as they headed down to his garage.
He called the lawyer, getting the secretary. They got into the car and he drove out, heading toward BJ’s, as he talked to the woman.
“Good, good, is he in? Okay, but will he take a call from me? Great, thanks, Laney, I owe you.”
“Always the smooth talker …” Tabitha muttered.
Devlin grinned, nodding his head.
He was finished talking to the lawyer a few moments later. When he hung up, he shook his head.
“I knew it,” he said. “I don’t know what the fuck, Putnam thinks, but he’s going to lose if he goes against your dad.”
Tabitha looked perplexed. “Then what does he think he’s doing?”
“I don’t have a clue,” Devlin said.
“Should we tell Dad?” she asked.
“Not at this point,” Devlin said. “I think he needs to get further from what happened first.”
Tabitha nodded.
At the house, predictably, Brenden was difficult, and as usual, Devlin found a way around that.
“We’ll cook, you’ll eat,” he said simply.
Brenden said nothing. Devlin shrugged, and set about doing exactly what he said. In the end, Brenden ate very little, but he did eat. He still didn’t say much though.
Tabitha kept silent, not wanting to irritate her father, and let Devlin feel his way around Brenden’s state of mind. Again, something they’d always done over the years.
Brenden went back to his solitude after they ate, and Tabitha and Devlin spent the rest of the evening together in the family room watching movies, and talking. They didn’t talk about Brenden lest he overhear something and get irritated that he was being discussed. Brenden James Sparks hated nothing more than being “managed” as he put it.
Unlike in his public life, Brenden didn’t do things in his personal life for effect. So his silence wasn’t a cry for attention, or to get anyone to beg him to talk. It was his way of dealing with his unhappiness. What had Tabitha climbing the walls was the fact that she didn’t know if he was mad at her, or just mad in general. She hated the idea that he was mad at her.
Finally that night, after Devlin left, she went to talk to her father. She needed to understand what he was feeling. She was willing to brave his anger if that’s what it took. Devlin hadn’t been keen on the idea of her doing so without him around, but Tabitha knew her father well enough to know that he’d get more angry knowing Devlin was around to manage the situation should it get out of hand.
“It’s my fault he sees it that way,” she’d explained to Devlin. “I’ve always used you as my backup when I have to face him, and he knows that. It pisses him off that I feel I need protection from him.”
“Okay,” Devlin had said, nodding his head, “but if you need me, you call me, no matter what time, okay?”
She thanked him for his usual concern for her well-being.
As she walked up to Brenden’s door, Tabitha felt her courage failing her. She heard her father’s stereo. He was listening to Foreigner, the song “Cold as Ice” was playing. She knocked on the door, and heard him say, “Come.”
He was sitting on his bed. The lyric that talked about the othe
r person being so cold that they’d be willing to sacrifice even their love for each other struck a chord with her. That’s what he thought about Allexxiss, that she was so cold that she was able to throw them both away. The urge to explain to him why Allex had done what she had was strong, but she knew that her father would just read it as her trying to defend her mother again. Now wasn’t the time.
“Yes?” Brenden asked, picking up the remote to turn the stereo down.
Tabitha walked over to the bed and sat down, her eyes searching her father’s face.
“I need to talk to you,” she said.
Brenden looked at her for a long moment, his eyes narrowing slightly. She knew he was trying to decide whether or not to tell her to leave. She waited in silence for his response. Finally, he sat back, leaning against his headboard. He pulled his knees up to his chest and rested his arms over his knees.
“Talk,” he said simply.
Tabitha took a deep breath.
“Daddy, I need to know if it’s me you’re mad at,” she said, her voice coming out much more plaintive than she’d meant it to.
His light blue-green eyes reflecting surprise. She wasn’t sure if he was surprised at what she thought, or that she was actually unsure of whether or not he was mad at her.
He shook his head, blowing his breath out.
“No, Tab, I’m not mad at you,” he said. “I’m just …” He shrugged. “I don’t know. I just know I’m fucking tired of this ride right now.”
She nodded sadly, another stab of worry assailing her. When he referred to being “tired of the ride,” he meant life. She knew at this point she couldn’t suggest he talk to a professional, he’d probably kick her out of the house.
“Daddy …” she said, her voice reflecting the tears in her eyes.
“Tabbie, I just need time, okay?”
“But …”
“Tabbie, you need to live your life, okay? You need to make a decision about college and go out and live your life. There’s nothing you can do for me that I can’t do myself. Go live your life, Tabitha, please.”
He was scaring her. It was like he was saying goodbye and she didn’t like it.
“I have to know you’ll be okay, Dad,” she said, sounding much more adult than she ever had before.
“I will be,” he replied.
“I don’t believe you,” she told him as she got up.
Brenden didn’t reply, he just stared back at her calmly. It alarmed her that she’d just told her father flat out that she though he was lying to her, and that didn’t even phase him. She was at a total loss as to what to do now.
She sighed, shaking her head.
“I love you, Daddy,” she said solemnly. “I just hope that you know that. And hope you realize that if I ever lost you, my life would be ruined.”
With that, she turned and left the room, managing to hold her tears in until after she’d closed his door quietly. Brenden stared at the closed door for a long time. He had to give her credit; she knew exactly what to say and how to say it to cut straight to his heart. If he gave his life up, he’d ruin hers, it was as simple as that.
“Lovely,” he muttered to himself, lying down on his bed, staring at the ceiling.
Tabitha left the house a little while later, driving over to Devlin’s and crawling into bed with him. He turned over, knowing before he opened his eyes that it was her. He pulled her into his arms, and she snuggled into his embrace. She told him what had happened, and what Brenden had said and what she’d told her father.
“If I lose him, Devlin, I don’t know what I’ll do,” she said, shaking her head.
“You won’t,” Devlin said, grinning. “You just nailed him to the wall with what you said. Now he knows what the impact will be on you, and he won’t be able to handle the guilt of knowing that.”
“I don’t know, Dev …” she said, shaking her head. “I just pray to God you’re right.”
“I’m right,” he told her assuredly.
He wasn’t really sure he was, but he knew she needed all the assurances she could get. Nothing could be done about Brenden’s state of mind. Devlin did resolve, however, to make sure that Brenden knew Allexxiss had been threatened into staying away from him. They had to try anything that might snap Brenden out of it.
Devlin got a call from Angelica the following morning.
“Mr. McGregor?” she queried.
“I think you can call me Devlin, Angelica,” he said, grinning.
“I’m sorry, Devlin, look, it’s Allex, something is very, very wrong with her, and she won’t talk to anyone about it.”
“Do you think it has to do with BJ?”
“I know it does,” she said, “but she used to at least talk to me about it, now she just keeps to herself. She’s losing weight, a lot of it. She had a scene yesterday where she had to wear this skintight outfit. Wardrobe had a fit because what used to be tight on her was extremely loose. It scared a lot of people on the set.”
“Okay, this is getting ridiculous now,” Devlin said, “these two need to talk, if it’s the last damned thing we do.”
“But how?” Angelica asked. “Allex won’t go near him again. She’s still reeling from the scene at the hospital. She’s not likely to go crawling back to him again.”
“I know,” Devlin said, chewing on the gum in his mouth in agitation. “Okay, let me give you the lowdown here …” Devlin said, and he told her what BJ’s lawyer had told him. “Now, go to her and tell her everything. Make her listen.”
“Okay, I’ll tell her, I hope it helps,” she said.
Angelica hung up with Devlin, and made her way to Allexxiss’ trailer. Allex didn’t answer at first, then Angelica heard the lightest call of, “Come in.”
Inside the trailer it was dark and cool. She found Allexxiss lying on the bed at the back.
“Allex?” she queried.
“Hey Angelica,” Allexxiss said, turning over to face her. “I was going to let everyone know later, but I’ll tell you now,” she said. “I’m canceling the rest of the shoot here in New York.”
“Why?” Angelica asked, surprised.
“Because it’s just getting too hot here, and I don’t feel like we’re getting what we need,” Allex said airily.
Angelica could see she was trying to rush through this, so she could be alone again. But Angelica had no intention of just leaving.
She nodded. “Okay, I understand. Um, can we talk for a few?” Angelica asked gently.
“About what?” Allexxiss asked, her tone wary instantly.
“Well, about Brenden,” Angelica said.
“No,” Allexxiss said, defensively sitting up and pulling a pillow onto her lap. “I don’t want to talk about any of that anymore.”
“Okay, well, I need to tell you something,” Angelica said, trying a different tact. “I have a confession to make.”
“A confession?” Allexxiss asked, looking mystified.
“Yes,” Angelica said, putting on her best act yet, biting her lip in uncertainty, “when all that stuff happened with BJ and the hospital, I kind of call Devlin McGregor and told him what you told me about Max threatening to ruin BJ.”
“You what!” Allex exclaimed, giving her a distressed look.
“I’m sorry!” Angelica said. “But I hated what you were going through, and I thought Devlin might be able to help.”
“Goddamn it, Angelica!” Allexxiss raged. “I didn’t want any of this getting back to Brenden. God, how fucking pathetic can one person look to him?” she said, her own self-disgust coming to bear.
“Well, see … that’s the thing,” Angelica said. “Max is wrong.”
“What?” Allexxiss asked, sounding distracted, her mind was busy thinking of a way out of all of this.
“Max is wrong,” Angelica repeated, “he couldn’t hurt Brenden if his life depended on it.”
“Angelica, Max has power you don’t understand,” Allexxiss said.
“No, Allexxiss, you don’t underst
and,” Angelica said, her tone much stronger now. “Max and even you put together aren’t worth a tenth of what Brenden is worth. In fact, if Brenden decided he wanted to crush Max Putnam, he could do it with a mere flick of his wrist.”
Allexxiss stared at Angelica, her mouth open in shock. Then she shook her head.
“You’re wrong,” she said. “I saw the financial report, Max had on Brenden. I was snooping through his desk before I left to come to New York. I wanted to make sure he was following through on some promises he made me, and I found it. Brenden’s only worth about eighteen million, and fifteen of that is tied up in this movie.”
Angelica shook her head. “You’re wrong, Allexxiss,”
“I don’t think so,” Allexxiss replied.
“Isn’t it worth it to try and talk to Brenden about it?” Angelica asked, feeling desperate.
She had no idea what report Allexxiss had seen, or what it meant. All she knew was that Allexxiss was dying without Brenden, and from what she’d heard, Brenden was doing the same.
“No,” Allexxiss said, shaking her head, “he’s made it very clear he doesn’t want me in his life at all, unless I can be part of it permanently. I won’t make that mistake again.”
Angelica winced at the sadness in Allexxiss’ eyes.
“I’m sorry,” Angelica said softly, feeling bereft suddenly.
“It’s okay,” Allexxiss said. “I’m sorry for yelling at you, it’s not your fault.”
Angelica nodded, standing up. She left the trailer feeling worse than when she’d entered.
****
Two weeks later in Los Angeles, The Living Edge was supposed to be back to filming, but Allexxiss hadn’t shown up to the set for three days. They were told that she was sick. Angelica didn’t believe that, she was sure that Allexxiss was getting more and more depressed.
Angelica went to the set at the set time, and once again, Allexxiss didn’t show up. They did all the work they could without her there, but there wasn’t much that could be done. When she left, Angelica was determined to do something. She got into her car and headed for Allexxiss’ house. She wasn’t sure if security would even let her in, but she knew she needed to try. She’d grabbed an envelope out of her trailer with Allexxiss’ name on it hoping to make up some story about needing to get these documents to Allex.
Sparks (Wild Irish Silence Book 1) Page 18