by M. A. Stone
“Calm down Bleu, you are going to get sick,” he said softly. He smelled really good, and I nuzzled into his chest. His heart was beating fast, unless I imagined that. He looked down at me, his face moved closer to mine and our lips touched. Holy shit! It was Fourth of July wrapped in a lightning storm, the kiss was so powerful. His lips slid across mine, the tip of his tongue touched to mine. My blood felt hot, so did my skin. I wanted to crawl inside of him so badly. My heart beat faster and I grabbed his t shirt in my hands, and his hand cradled my head as he deepened the kiss. Then he pushed me away. I put my fingers to my lips.
“What the fuck!?” I mumbled. He stood up and put his hands in his pockets, his face flushed. He looked up at me with a scared look on his face.
“I think we better just...uh... go to sleep Bleu. I mean I want this, but not like this,” he said quickly. I stared at him and he glared at me, his chest rising and falling hard and fast. I licked my lips to taste him on me. He watched me with hungry eyes.
“Aww fuck it!” he growled.
He stalked over to me, grabbed my face in his hands and his mouth descended on mine. He tangled his hands in my long hair, his body pushing mine down onto the couch, chest to chest. My hands pulled his t shirt up roughly and I sighed when my fingertips touched his heated skin. Running my fingers up his ribcage and then over to his back, I moaned at the contact. He did too. He had me pressed into the couch his hands under my shirt too, skimming over my sides, and the middle of my back. I arched my back, pressing my chest into his and I gasped at the contact. My nipples were hardened and I wanted him to touch them and if he didn’t I was going to. I need some relief. I needed him. His tongue tangled in mine again and I thought my heart would stop beating. I could feel hot desire pooling between my legs and I ground my pelvis against his. He moaned and me over so that I was lying on top of him. He broke the kiss and looked up at me, cupping my face in his hands. His chest heaved like mine did and I could feel the rapid beat of his heart.
“You ok?” he asked, softly. I licked my lips and grinned.
“I am not okay. I am so not okay,” he muttered. He jumped off of the couch and started to pace, his hands on the top of his head. I watched him for a minute.
“This is wrong. You are drunk. I refuse to take advantage of you. I can’t,” he said quickly. He looked at me and his face was pale.
“Your first time, should be special. You know roses and candles and music and shit. Not on a couch smelling like the bar I just dragged you out of!” he continued. I nodded. He was right.
“You’re right Jack. One hundred percent,” I whispered. He nodded.
“You have been doing all this back and forth about me. I never want to take advantage of you. I am not that guy. I mean, I know I was in jail and all that,” he said. He came and sat beside me, clasping my hands in his.
“You are not that guy. I know,” I said softly. He was the sweetest guy. Abby was right. He made my heart happy.
“I am not Bleu,” he said. He looked like he was going to cry. I leaned forward and kissed him softly. He sighed.
“Jack. I trust you. I sleep with you almost every night. Did you know that when we are asleep, we are at our most vulnerable? I trust you. You have done nothing but are there for me, this whole time, from the first minute I met you. Even though I was on the fence about you and me, we were already together. I just did not see it before now. I am not drunk. Not anymore.”
“But Bleu,” he stuttered. I kissed him softly again. And my words to him sunk in. He had more than proved himself to be a decent guy. He had stood by me, stood up for me and looked out for me. He was sweet, kind and loving. He made me laugh, he was smart and sometimes, too good to be true. He was not perfect, but he was close. And who wanted perfect anyways? He was the one for me. When I was not with him, I wanted to be. When we were together, I could not get close enough. Was I ready to profess my love for him? Not yet. But I was ready to take the next step with him and I knew in my heart, in my soul, that he would not hurt me or let anything bad happen to me. I looked up at him and smiled.
“I want to be with you,” I whispered. He looked at me and sighed.
“Like date right?” he asked nervously. I kissed him softly again. He brought his hand up and caressed my cheek, and I nuzzled the palm of his hand.
“Like in every way possible,” I whispered. He shook his head.
“I took me, lying here, trying to reassure you to see the light. I am a dumb ass. I am. You are mine. I am yours. It does not matter if we sleep together; make love, or just cuddle. I want to be yours Jack,” I said. He closed his eyes and moaned. He kissed me again, his tongue massaging mine. I broke the kiss by putting my hand on his chest.
“I don’t want to pressure you. I never did,” he said, looking into my eyes. I nodded.
“And you haven’t. You put up with my indecisive ass, all my whining. Even Abby told me I was being a whiny bitch. You have been nothing short of amazing. I am falling for you Jack. I am just not ready to tell you every single feeling and emotion. I am not built like that either. But, I know that you would never pressure me or make me do anything that I don’t want to do. I want to be with you,” I said. I smiled at him and he just looked at me.
“We can stop anytime you want baby,” he whispered. I nodded.
“Okay,” I replied.
“What…what do we do now?” he asked his eyes full of so many emotions.
“Shut up and kiss me,” I replied. His eyes got dark with desire and he ground his lips against mine again. Quickly, his hands went up under my shirt and unhooked the clasp on my bra. I sighed against his mouth as I felt my heavy breasts released from my bra. He slid it and my shirt off of me and tossed them on the floor. The cool air did nothing to cool me down, I wanted so much more. In the blink of an eye, his hands were on my breasts, cupping one in each of his hands, pinching the nipples gently between his thumb and forefinger. I saw stars from the contact, my back arching, my pussy getting wetter. Did he know what he was doing to me? I wished he could feel the aching he was causing. He was so hard, pressed against me, almost on my core. So much for not doing anything hmmmm? Aww fuck it. I wanted this man. I was tired of being so damn afraid.
“Fuck you are beautiful,” he said in awe. He grabbed me, pulled me to him and kissed me again.
“I want to touch you everywhere,” he whispered. His deep voice got even deeper. His shirt came off next; tossed on the floor. He pushed me off of him gently and then he stood up. He lifted me in his arms and walked us toward his bedroom. Slowly, he placed me on the bed, coming to lie beside me. My stomach fluttered in anticipation. We kissed again and again, hungry and desperate. Our tongues tangled, hands everywhere, wrapped up in one another. His hands found my breasts once more, caressing them, kneading them with his strong hands. He gently pinched one nipple and then the other. He ducked his head down and then his warm hot tongue was lapping at my nipples, circling them with the tip of his tongue. He repeated this over and over, creating a dull, persistent ache in my core, making my pussy throb and thrum. Every now and then he would suck them softly, dragging his teeth gently against them. Over and over I moaned softly. He looked at me and smiled devilishly, then returned to licking and sucking on my nipples. I dug my fingers into his shoulder, the other hand cupping the back of his head.
“You are going to make me come just doing this,” I moaned. He stops his licking and sucking torture and grinned. He moved up my body, fitting his mouth to mine and kissed me softly, then looked into my eyes. His hands splayed across my belly and then he began to slide off my pants, torturously slow. Then he tossed them on the floor. He moaned when he saw that I was naked under my jeans.
“Commando huh?” he remarked with a grin.
“The pants were tight, no panty lines allowed. Chloe told me that’s how to do it,” I replied matter of fact.
“Remind me to thank her that later,” he said.
He smiled again and caressed my thighs with his hands, squeezing,
touching the skin of my inner thighs with feather light touches. I sighed at the soft, gentle contact. He was lighting me on fire. Propping himself up on his forearms, he leaned forward, and began to kiss my thighs, nuzzling the skin after each touch with his nose. All I could focus on, all I could feel was his hot mouth and then his hot wet tongue tracing invisible patterns on my warm skin. My hips rocked slightly and I began to squirm. Adjusting his position, his mouth moved further north, kissing on my stomach, tracing my belly button with the very tip of his tongue, and just as quick as he started his upward kisses, he was travelling back down to my thighs. I was going crazy, absolutely fucking crazy. Every damn inch of my skin felt like it was on fire, like it would burn up at any minute and oh God did I want it to. I wanted this, him, so badly. Softly, gently, he parted my thighs with his hands, running his fingers up the insides, making me moan softly. His breath was hot and I could feel it against my most tender area. He kissed up the inside of my thigh, nibbling softly with his teeth here and there, earning a soft moan or two from me. He was getting closer and closer to where I wanted his mouth, but it was deliciously agonizing. As if he read my mind, he softly touched my warm, wet folds with his long fingers, parting them. He ran his index finger up my slit, softly caressing the heated folds. I moaned loudly and then gasped as I felt him slide that very finger inside of me. I could feel my pussy clench at the intrusion and I wanted to slide myself up and down on him. My hands went to my breasts, kneading them, as he slid his finger in and out of me while his thumb circled my clit lazily.
“You like that baby?” he asked, his voice so sexy. I moaned and moved my hips a little. He sighed and slid his finger in and out a little faster.
“You are so wet and tight,” he said, groaning. He moved it in and out of me slowly, making me want more. His movements started a deep, dull and tender ache inside of me. He took the finger out after a few minutes and spread my legs further, putting them on his shoulders.
“Want to taste you,” he murmured. His head getting closer and closer to my core. I could feel my heart begin to race. I was no dummy; I knew where this was going, or rather where he was going. Thank God! His mouth descended on my wet mound and I cried out as I felt his hot tongue circling my clit. He sucked and licked me, his mouth so hot it made me grind myself up against him, aching for more. I could not get enough of his mouth. Oh my God! He slid a finger back inside of me and I cried out even louder, the combination of lips, tongue, teeth and fingers too much for my mind to comprehend. He moved his fingers slow inside of me and I found myself moving my hips, while he sucked and licked my clit. I panted his name, along with soft little gasps, my hands on his head. I was a mess and I did not fucking care. It felt so incredibly good! My hands were on his head, his hand, pushing him further into me. God I wanted him to just climb the fuck inside of me. He moaned softly into me as he licked and sucked my pussy, his finger hitting some magical spot that made me clench around him so tight. I felt the throbbing increase, the delicious pressure grows stronger and I screamed out as I crashed all over him, coming so hard. He continued to lick me, but softer this time and I was so sensitive, I mewled softly, my hips still bucking, my walls clenching around his fingers that were inside of me. He slid his finger out and licked it, looking at me the whole time, with a grin that was sexy as hell. He crawled up the bed toward me and kissed me deep and hard. I could taste myself on his tongue and it made me hot all over again. My face and body felt like it was on fire. I wanted more. He stroked my face and ran his hand down my ribs, gripping my hips, his fingers digging into me, possessing me. In a quick movement, he removed his jeans and tossed them off of the bed. My eyes widened. He was really big and thick. Holy fuck! How in the hell did he plan on getting that in me?? I mean, you read about guys in romance novels all the damn time and they are always hung like horses, but this…this was IMPRESSIVE. I bit my bottom lip nervously, and looked up into his eyes. He leaned down and kissed me.
“Don’t worry, it will fit,” he whispered against my mouth.
“Are you sure?” I whispered back. He chuckled.
“Sweetheart, we will go slowly. If it hurts, we will stop,” he promised. I nodded and he leaned over me. I kissed him softly, at first, then hungrily, to show him just how ready for him I was. Or rather, thought I was. Kissing me still, his tongue entangled with mine, he positioned himself over me and I felt the head of his cock rub up against my sensitive clit. I was soaking wet for him and I wanted him inside of me so badly. He grabbed himself with his hand and slid in me a little. Oh my god! Could this get any better? I tilted my hips up a bit, to give him easier access, and he stilled my movements.
"Let me baby," he whispered hoarsely. I bit my lip and nodded. He groaned and then smiled. He slid in a little further and stopped. To me, it felt like there was something there, stopping him. He stopped and then pushed all the way in. And there it was. Holy mother of pearl! The pain was sharp, intense and I cried out, but not in pleasure. He looked down at me and his eyes became worried.
“Look at me Bleu. Open your eyes beautiful, “he whispered, placing soft kisses on my neck, cheek, forehead and then my mouth. I opened my eyes and looked up at him.
"Are you okay?"
“Yes,” I said, recovering from the sharp pain. My heart was racing and I breathed shallow, shaky little breaths.
“Bleu breathe. It will get better, I promise,” he said. Leaning up, I pulled him to me and I kissed his mouth. I raised my hips up, I cautiously grinded myself against him, biting my lip a bit. He moaned and moved slowly inside of me. He kissed my neck, sucked on my earlobe and whispered in my ear. His kisses and slow thrusts made the pain go away a bit, and I moved with him. We were both heated and I was wrapped around him so tightly it made me insane. The raw pain started to ease up a bit and was being traded with aching pleasure. His mouth was all over me, leaning down a bit to suckle on my breast, licking the nipple, before going back to my mouth. His hips rocked, his cock slid in and out of me slowly. Calling out his name, I came so hard over him, I felt dizzy. He grunted, whispering my name, touching my face, not able to stop touching me. I continued to match his thrusts, the ache building in me again, so damn quickly. He covered my mouth with his own and moaned. His thrusts got faster and deeper, growling a bit as he came in me, his hips banging into mine hard, filling me. I gasped and came around him again, my vision getting blurry, my pussy aching deliciously, my hips bucked again and again. He looked down at me and smiled. He took a deep breath, pulled me to him and rolled us over onto our sides, so that we were facing one another. He propped himself up on his elbows and looked at me.
“You are going to be the death of me woman!” he sighed. He looked down and kissed me softly. Brushing my hair out of my face, he kissed me again, our skin so hot and covered in a sheen of sweat. We were both breathing hard. He got up and went into the bathroom, coming back with a warm washcloth. He lay back down beside me and gently cleaned me up. With a soft kiss, he gathered me into his arms. He felt so good wrapped around me. It felt like I was home, right where I belonged. Sleep soon took me.
Sunlight danced over my face, tickling my eyelids. I squinted and rolled over. Jack slept next to me and I looked up at the ceiling. What did we do? Did he regret it? Did I? What was wrong with me? Wait nothing. Did his kisses feel right? Yes. Did I have feelings for him? Yes. I definitely had feelings for him. Was I scared? Hell yes. As if hearing my crazed thoughts, Jack stirred and pulled me to him.
“Morning,” he said sleepily. He turned me to him and kissed me so deep it made my toes curl. Apparently he was not worried about morning breath.
“Did you sleep okay? Do you feel okay?” he asked. He opened his eyes fully and studied my face. I gave him a shy smile.
“Yes to both. But I have to be honest, I don’t do this kind of stuff Jack,” I said nervously. He kissed me again.
“Bleu, I had proof of that last night. If I had not wanted to be with you like that, I would not have. I would have told you no,” he replied and he
kissed me again.
"Told me no? I think ultimately that is my choice or was, right?"
"True," he replied and nuzzled my neck with his nose. I sighed happily and arched my back.
“I don’t want to be that girl,” I muttered. He grabbed my face, a determined look on his handsome face.
“You will never be that girl Bleu. You never will. You are a good person. Chloe is an excellent judge of character and your brother always said nothing but good things about you,” he said firmly.
“I am confused Jack,” I said.
“You are reading into this way too much. I swear I can see the wheels turning in your little head as we speak. Relax. Go with the flow. Enjoy this,” he replied.
“Enjoy this?” I whispered.
“Did you like kissing me? Touching me? Being touched by me? Did you like it when I made love to you?” He asked. Those questions were just asked by me a few minutes ago.
“Yes,” I said softly.
“I am not one of those guys who play games Bleu. I am not like your brother; I don’t sleep with a new girl every night. I have not had a girlfriend in years. I am 28; I am too old to be playing high school games. We have known each other a few months; I have known your family for years. All those times we spent together at work and here, it meant something to me dammit. I have already told you that I am falling for you, “he said, his voice firm.
“I am blind, stupid even. I have loved every minute we have spent together. I guess that I did not want to make more out of it than it really was. I did not want to read into things if nothing was there. It just feels right to be with you. But I don’t know how to do this, a normal relationship,” I replied, my voice cracking here and there.
“Heck if I know. I am not some relationship guru. All I know is that I cannot stop touching you, thinking about you and falling for you. I could spend this whole day here with you, inside of you and never ever want to leave. You have gotten under my skin, and I am totally fine with that. I am not all flowery and poetic, but I know what I want, and I want you. I have no idea what a normal relationship is, or where to even begin. But we can figure things out together okay? And you can be definitely rest easy knowing that I am not going to fuck your boss. Seeing as how I am your boss,” he said with a laugh. I punched him lightly in the arm and he chuckled.