by Lisa Kessler
His emotions weren’t encroaching on me, so I hoped I wouldn’t regret my answer. “Sure.”
He walked me over to a bench overlooking the lake. My wolf growled at his touch, light on the small of my back. We sat down, and he turned toward me. “You’re stunning, Nadya.”
“Thank you.” Heat flushed my cheeks. “Maybe it was the four hours of sleep in a row.”
“Maybe it’s because you’re beautiful.” He paused and shifted his gaze out to the water. “You think Gareth is your mate, but you deserve someone who doesn’t turn tail and run when the road gets rough. I know life’s thrown him some curves recently. I’m not trying to bash him, it’s just that…” He caught my chin, turning me to meet his eyes. “I’m here for you. If you’ll let me in, I’ll be by your side. You can count on me.”
My chest tightened and tears burned my eyes. “You’re an incredible man, but it wouldn’t be fair to you. Even if I could let you in my heart, you’d be stuck wondering if you were a fallback plan.” I squeezed his hand, blinking back tears. “Jason, you need your mate. The other half of your soul. Even though I only experienced it for a brief moment, that intensity will haunt me forever. And you deserve no less.”
He shook his head. “Gareth is a lucky bastard.”
“Not really.” I stood up. “His mate is on borrowed time.”
Aren stepped out, saving me from crying away my mascara. “Hey, Nadya.”
I smiled and rushed over to his waiting arms. “Congratulations.”
He pulled back, practically beaming. Being in love looked great on him. “This is your last chance to trade me in for a better brother.”
“No such person exists.” I rolled my eyes. “Besides, Sasha would kill me.”
He chucked my chin, his expression softening. “Thanks for all your help today.”
“You don’t have to thank me. Just make my sister happy.”
“That’s definitely my plan.”
Chapter Fourteen
Gareth
I stared at my reflection in the mirror, almost wishing I’d decide the monkey suit looked like shit so I could convince myself to blow off the wedding.
But the tux didn’t look bad. In fact, I cleaned up pretty well.
My bike sat beside the two-seater. Gabe’s Harley. Since I’d taken Nadya out on it, I had new memories for the Road King. My heart didn’t ache when I looked at it anymore. Instead of mourning, I caught myself remembering the feel of Nadya’s arms tight around my waist as we road toward Pyramid Lake.
This morning, I’d dreamed of her. We were in the shower, her slick body in my arms as she ran her hands up my chest. I almost lost it right there, pulling her tighter against me. I’d never wanted a woman so badly.
Her scent was still in my lungs when I woke up. So real. Just remembering it sent blood pulsing below my belt. No one had ever had this kind of primal effect on me. I wasn’t a nineteen-year-old in a constant state of arousal anymore. It took more than a memory of a sexy dream to make me hard enough to pound nails.
I shifted myself in my slacks. At least it used to take more than a dream.
The clock on the wall reminded me I needed to get my ass on the road or I’d miss the whole thing. I walked past my bike and swung my leg over the Road King. If I managed to convince Nadya to forgive me, I couldn’t steal her away on my bike. I’d need the two-seater.
I caught my reflection in the glass. Never in a million years did I think I’d be one of those guys wearing a tux on his Harley, but it wasn’t every day a lifelong friend got married, and I had bigger things to worry about than how idiotic I looked.
Somehow I had to figure out how to make things right with my mate. I pressed the button and the garage door rose as the Road King roared to life. The late afternoon sun blinded me for a second before I rolled out and closed the door behind me.
No turning back now.
…
When I arrived at the Sloan cabin, I slalomed through the cars and trucks parked in the driveway and turned off the bike. Pulling off my helmet, I stared up at the double doors, bracing myself for what lay on the other side. After combing my hair and tying it back into a ponytail again, I got off the Harley and made my way up the front steps.
My keen hearing picked up the acoustic guitar playing out back. Shit. It already started. I hadn’t told anyone I was coming. Was I more of an asshole for slinking in late, or for hanging outside and missing Aren’s big day? Hell if I knew.
“Damn it.” I grumbled and reached for the door.
If I stayed out here, it’d be way too simple to sneak away and pretend I’d never come. I’d visited with the Stone Mother and asked for healing, but she didn’t promise me an easy journey. It’d be work and most likely painful, but Nadya might not have much time left. I didn’t want to waste another minute.
I opened the door quietly, doing my best not to attract any attention, but the second I saw Nadya walking away from me, down the aisle on Jason’s arm, the wolf inside me snarled, a dangerous warning. I’d told her to stay close to him, that he was her best chance to beat the mutated DNA in her veins, so I had no right to be pissed.
But knowing that changed nothing. My instincts were in overdrive. This was my mate and he didn’t have any claim on her.
Something moved on the stairs and my attention shifted in that direction. Adam came down with Sasha on his arm. His green eyes locked on mine and I lowered my gaze. He was my Alpha and the wolf inside of me respected his role. Without speaking a word, I was well aware of his order. Do not interfere in Aren’s big day.
His silent admonition resonated with my wolf and the surge of aggression that hit me the moment I opened the door receded a little bit. I could breathe. It was better than making a scene and decking the shit out of Jason.
I followed behind Adam and Sasha at a distance, trying not to draw attention to myself. Seeing Aren’s face light up when his bride walked through the French doors onto the deck made me glad I came. I’d never seen him so happy. In that moment, I realized that while I’d been so blinded by my bitterness over him and Adam choosing jaguars for mates, I hadn’t noticed the changes in either of them.
Lana and Sasha brought out the best in Adam and Aren, an inner strength and peace I’d never realized they were lacking. Maybe it was all part of maturing from single guys to married men. Hell, Adam was a father now.
I took a chair in the back row of the ceremony. The same minister who married Adam stood before Aren and Sasha, reminding them of the sanctity of their union and helping them with their vows, but my gaze was fixed on the maid of honor.
Nadya had her hair up in some kind of sleek knot or bun, or whatever it was. One stray, silky lock of her dark hair trailed down her long slender neck, enticing me to reach out and touch her skin. Her dress was simple in the same style as her sister’s wedding dress. The deep rich green fabric caressed her curves without being tight. I’d never seen her look more beautiful.
She didn’t appear to be pale or sick. Maybe my dream had been just that, a dream. Relief loosened my shoulders and I relaxed back in my chair and did my best to calm the wolf inside me. It didn’t understand why we weren’t walking down that aisle and claiming what was ours.
I had no clue how to explain that our mate may not welcome us with open arms.
She handed her sister a ring and whispered, “I love you.”
Even though it was meant for Sasha alone, no one in the Pack could have missed it. Secrets were hard to keep in a family of werewolves.
Hearing her voice made my heart race. How had I walked away from her? And I hadn’t walked. Hell no, I ran for the hills, all the way to Colorado. I glanced at my shoes, shaking my head. I didn’t deserve a second chance.
“I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”
Aren dipped Sasha, enjoying a long, slow kiss before righting his bride and turning toward all of us. His eyes met mine and I froze, but instead of judgment, he smiled, tipping his head in my direction.
I nodded in return, standing with the rest of the wedding party.
Nadya turned around slowly and all the air blew out of my lungs. Our gazes locked and her cheeks paled. Aren and Sasha made their way down the center aisle, and Jason blocked my view of Nadya as he came over to take her arm. Her eyes never left mine as they walked toward me. My hands balled into fists at my sides. Struggling to keep my aggressive wolf in check, I followed them back into the house.
Once we were inside, I stopped Jason. “Could I get a minute with Nadya?”
“Nice of you to show up.” Jason didn’t release her arm. “Don’t you think you’ve hurt her enough?”
Adam chose that moment to step up beside me. Having my Alpha at my side was the only thing keeping me from clocking Jason.
“Good to see you, Gareth.” Adam clasped my forearms and glanced at Jason. “Aren was hoping you’d make it back in time for the ceremony.”
Jason leaned closer to Nadya. “Want to get out of here?”
Her beautiful eyes stayed on me as she shook her head. “No. I’m fine.” She shifted her gaze to the doctor on her arm as she slid her hand free. “Thank you.”
A muscle jumped in Jason’s cheek and his eyes narrowed in my direction. “If you care about anyone other than yourself, don’t do this.” Jason’s voice became a growl. “Leave her alone.”
Adam tensed beside me, but Nadya took a step forward, snapping the tension and bringing all the focus on her. “I’ve got a few things I’d like to say to Gareth. Would you excuse us?”
Adam nodded and grabbed Jason’s elbow as he turned to walk away. “Come on, Jason, let’s go congratulate the groom.”
Jason didn’t look happy, but he went with Adam. Nadya’s eyes brimmed with tears. My gut twisted. I opened my mouth, but she shook her head and took my hand, sending heat coursing through my body. The effect she had on me made the earth shift under my feet.
“Outside.” She went to the French doors and I followed. “Close the doors.”
I wasn’t used to taking orders, but I complied. Anything to ease the pain that lined her features. She went to the railing and walked to the opposite end of the deck, away from the wedding arch and the corner where Logan’s band would play.
When she stopped and turned toward me, the last remaining light of dusk shone on her face, robbing her skin of color, reminding me that her light was dimming as well. “Jason hasn’t cured me. I had another attack.”
Shit. The dream had been real. “I’m sorry. I should’ve been here.” I wasn’t ready to try to explain that I might’ve been with her in a dream state. For now it still felt nuts. “I missed you.”
She shook her head, swiping a tear before it could fall. “I’m still dying.”
Hearing her say the words hurt. I ground my teeth to keep hold of my emotions as I reached up to cup her cheek. Her skin was soft under my rough fingers.
“We all are.” I cleared my throat to find my voice again. “You deserve so much better than me, but if you’ll give me the chance, I want to be worthy of being called your mate.”
“You kissed me and something woke up that I’ve never felt before.” Another tear rolled from the corner of her eye. I caught it with the pad of my thumb. “The wolf inside me saw you, recognized you, and on some weird level we would have done anything to protect you. But you walked out the door and left the state of Nevada.” Her voice wobbled. “The rational part of me gets why, but the wolf can’t understand how you didn’t feel the connection. How could you walk out that door?”
“It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.” I took both her hands in mine, my heart ripping in two. “And it was the biggest mistake I’ve ever made. This had nothing to do with you. I was surprised and angry.” My eyes started burning. “I wanted to prove to the universe that it couldn’t hurt me anymore because I wasn’t going to feel anymore. It doesn’t make it right. I’m a selfish asshole, and I wouldn’t blame you if you decide to kick me to the curb, but I’m standing here, praying you’ll give me one more chance.”
My vision blurred. I reached up, wiping my eyes. “I don’t care if we only have a few days together, I want to spend every second by your side. I want to memorize every curve of your face, and I want to see you smile and kiss that dimple in your cheek.”
She sobbed and laughed all at once, revealing the sexy dent I’d mentioned. I couldn’t resist. My lips caressed her skin and she turned, her mouth meeting mine, kissing me with a tenderness that nearly brought me to my knees. I embraced her, pressing her body tightly against mine. Her tongue twined slowly, seducing me until my pulse raced with desire.
I broke the kiss, resting my forehead to hers. “I’m a moody bastard and I’ll fight with every ounce of spirit I have to keep you here with me. But whatever time we get, I give you my word, I will never leave you again. Never.”
“These wolf instincts are a crazy thing.” She brushed her lips to mine again. I could kiss her for hours and still want more. “I’m not giving up without a fight, but there are no guarantees I’ll beat this. If my days are numbered, I plan on living them to the fullest. I don’t want to waste any time on a broken heart. If I let you in, there’s no walking out that door again.”
I stared into the lush green of her eyes and wondered how much of this connection actually was the wolf instincts. Before I kissed her and discovered she was my mate, the attraction had already been there. It grew in spite of my efforts to keep my distance. I enjoyed her company. And as much as it would tear me apart to see her fade away, if it came to that, I’d dig deep and hold her hand until her last breath.
I cupped her cheek, my lips almost touching hers. “Sweetheart, I’m not going anywhere.”
Chapter Fifteen
Nadya
My head spun like I’d been zapped on an electric fence. Gareth was really here, offering to stand by me whatever the future might hold. I would’ve pinched myself to be sure I wasn’t dreaming, but that would require taking a hand off of him and right now nothing could pull me away.
Except small children.
“Gareff!” Madeleine squealed seconds before she clamped onto his calf. Her twin brother claimed the other leg and I had to take a step back before we all toppled over.
Adam and Lana’s babies had already started walking and talking and they hadn’t quite reached their first birthday yet. I had no idea if this was a normal side effect of being born a shifter, or if they were just precocious, but it made them a handful to keep up with.
The corner of Gareth’s mouth curved up as he mussed their hair and scooped one up in each arm. He lifted them to his eye level. “Who told you two you could grow while I was gone?”
Malcolm patted his hand on Gareth’s chest. “No bye-bye.”
His dark eyes met mine and my pulse throbbed. “I’m home for good.” His gaze shifted to the little boy perched in the crook of his arm. “No more bye-bye.”
Malcolm’s face lit up. “No bye-bye!”
He wriggled around and Gareth finally set his feet on the ground. My heart flipped in my chest. Seeing this big, gruff, Harley-riding, tattooed man all dressed up in a tuxedo and entertaining little ones made my knees weak. He was mine.
Or would be. I wanted him to be.
I wanted him.
Malcolm patted my leg. “Up, Ya, up!”
He and his sister had shortened my name to Ya. I answered to it, wrapped tight around their fingers. I picked him up. “Have a kiss for me?”
He grinned and rubbed his face back and forth, our noses brushing until he squealed. After a bout of giggles, I set him down and a dark shadow blew through me. Would I be here to celebrate their first birthday?
I tamped the thought down, reassuring myself that Dr. Granger’s serum had worked. I’d slept for hours for the first time since I’d been bitten. Tomorrow I’d get my next injection. We were fighting this.
Gareth took my hand, breaking me free of my thoughts. He still held Madeleine up in his arm. He kissed her forehead, and she stared at h
im with dark doe eyes, so much like her mother’s.
She reached up to touch his cheek. “Gareff.” Bringing her other hand up, she pressed both sides of his face, pulling him close to her until they were nose to nose. “Be good.”
He smiled, and in that moment I caught a rare, unguarded glimpse of him. The real Gareth he fought so desperately to protect.
“Yes, ma’am.”
She grinned and planted a wet kiss on his cheek before she started kicking her feet. “Down!”
Gareth lowered her until her black Mary Jane’s were steady on the deck. He watched her vanish through the door before he pulled me close again. I stared into his eyes, bewildered and grateful that the wolf inside me had chosen him to be our mate.
“Is something wrong?”
I shook my head. “No.” Rising up on my toes, I kissed him. “Everything is just right.”
He slid his hand into the back of my hair and I hummed into his mouth, parting my lips as our tongues swirled slowly together.
“Ummm…” My sister cleared her throat. “There you are.”
I sighed, breaking the kiss. I wanted much more. We needed to get home.
“Sorry.” She came closer. “I didn’t mean to interrupt.”
Heat bloomed in my face, but Gareth’s rough hand distracted me, sliding down my arm until his fingers entwined with mine.
“Is everything okay?” I glanced inside the cabin. “Need any help?”
Sasha was focused on Gareth, but I didn’t sense the anger I was expecting. And he wasn’t giving off any defensiveness, either. Interesting.
“I’m glad you made it today.”
Gareth nodded. “Me, too.”
Her gaze shifted toward me. “Logan’s band photographer came early to snap some wedding photos. Can I borrow you for a minute?”
“Yeah, sure.”
Gareth squeezed my hand and slid his fingers free of mine. I looked at him over my shoulder as I walked away. “I’ll be right back.”
He nodded and turned toward the lake. His loneliness, the ache for his lost family slammed into me for a moment before he bottled up his emotions again. My hand trembled and I struggled to keep from running to his side. This was my sister’s day. Gareth would be all right. He gave me his word he wasn’t going anywhere.