by Anna Adams
“Huh?”
“This is it.”
“The letter? Don’t freak. You’re going to be fine. They—Open it.”
She did, tearing the envelope diagonally. The single page trembled between her fingers. ‘“Dear, Dr. Kea…We apologize…Sheriff Tom Drake appeared before us with an affidavit, as well as bringing one from the young man in question, whom you’ll be relieved to know is seeing a qualified therapist. We welcome you back to the prof…’” She crumpled the letter. “I’m free.”
“Like hell,” Bryony said as she laughed with joy. “You know you’ll still be walking those demon dogs.”
“Let’s go find champagne.” Maria started up the stairs, her sister hot on her heels. “Did you notice? Only Sheriff Drake appeared before them. I half assumed Jake would find a reason to go, too.”
“That’s what I’ve been saying. Maybe it’s your turn to make a change.”
ON CHRISTMAS EVE, Leila brought her things to stay over at Jake’s. Together, they made dinner and avoided the subject of Maria until they were trimming the tree, when Leila finally exploded.
“You’re not the same man you were, Dad. Don’t settle like you did with Mom. Go tell Maria exactly what you want.”
“I want her to trust me.” He needed her to need him. How did a man say that to a woman who’d asked him to stay away from her? She either loved him or she didn’t, and the past week had assured him she didn’t.
“I know what it’s like when you assume other people are coping better than they actually are. Naturally, she’s annoyed.”
“Naturally.” He passed his daughter a big, red ornament. “I’m going to do you a favor, because there’s a little of me in you. Never assume someone you love will forgive you after you make a decision for him.”
“You meant no harm.”
“She wants me to discuss the important things with her, and I tried, but she kept shutting me down. I was right, you know.”
“You were, this time.” Leila hung the ornament, backed up and then moved it to a different spot. “But, Dad, you were never right about protecting me. I’d have understood Mom had a problem.”
“I’m sorry,” he said. “But I never knew how to explain, and I didn’t want you to think badly of your mother.”
“I’m saying give a woman room. If she loves you, she won’t be able to give up. I didn’t give up on you, Dad.”
He looked at her.
“I love you enough to keep coming back when you backslide. Talk to Maria. She helped me understand second chances.”
“You have to get along with me. You’re my daughter.”
“I had to trust you’d finally talk about what really happened and be honest with me—that we’d share the problems in our family, rather than you wrapping them up, all fixed in a nice bow. If I hadn’t trusted you, daughter or not, I’d have given up on you when I lost Maria.” Leila rolled up her sleeves to show off fading scars. “Notice I’ve changed, too. Maria may be afraid you can’t harness the Machiavelli in you, but she’s in the business of change.”
MARIA MADE Bryony Christmas breakfast and carried it up to her room. She plumped up the stocking that included a gift card for a bookstore, and a few small things.
There was no answer at her sister’s bedroom door. “Bryony?”
She knocked again. Still, no answer. Maria balanced the tray on one arm and opened the bedroom door. It was empty. The comforter trailed onto the floor. Clothes littered a path past her feet, toward the shower, but the bathroom was empty.
“Hmm.”
Nothing to do but take her sister’s tray back to the kitchen. She poured herself a cup of coffee before she dug into eggs and bacon.
The front door banged open. Wind and sleigh bell sounds rushed through the small house.
“Santa?” she asked with a smile. This was Christmas day, after all. “Bryony, where’d you take the reindeer?”
“To pick me up.”
Leaning to see into the hall, Maria nearly fell out of her chair. “Mom?”
Gail Keaton seemed uncertain of her welcome. Maria ran to her mother, who backed up under the onslaught. Maria grabbed her and held on. Tears prickled beneath her eyelids.
“I’m so glad you’re here,” she said.
“It is Christmas. I came to see if you bought me any more presents.”
“You did not.” Maria held out her arms to Bryony behind their mother and all three hugged. It was like coming home. At last. Home to her mother and her sister. Home to herself.
“I love you,” she said to them.
“She’s a little emotional these days.” Bryony patted Maria’s head.
“Don’t you make fun of her. She’s always afraid we’ll do something crazy. It’s a big day when she can say she loves me without sounding just a little scared.”
“I’m not making fun.” Bryony nudged the door shut with her foot. “Let’s see what we got each other.”
First, Maria scrambled more eggs and cooked extra bacon. They ate quickly, all grabbing a second cup of coffee before they settled in front of the tree in the living room. Gail had stopped on the way to fish bright packages out of her bags.
She set them in her daughters’ laps.
“Mom, did you unwrap the things we sent you already?” Bryony asked.
“Yes, but I’m anxious to see what you think of yours.”
Bryony and Maria tore into their presents the way they had as children. Maria buried her nose in the soft pink scarf and cloche cap her mother had knitted. “When did you learn to do this?”
“I’m taking a hiatus from dating.” She nudged Bryony, who was holding a similar pile of pale green. “But a girl’s gotta do something with her hands.”
For once, all three laughed together. Then the doorbell rang.
Maria’s heart did a quick rumba in her chest. She couldn’t speak. Jake might have stayed away from the review board, but had he been able to stay away from her?
“Go answer it,” Bryony said.
“What am I missing?” Gail asked.
“I hope you’re missing Mr.-Just-Perfect-for-Maria. You’ll like him, but we must stay here because they haven’t been playing well together.” Her warning gaze was Maria’s anchor. “Coming here today took courage,” Bryony said.
“Doesn’t he have family of his own?”
“A daughter, Mom. Let Maria see if it’s him.”
Maria climbed around her mother and sister. Bryony’s low voice murmured as Maria headed toward the door with the grace of a woman trudging through quicksand.
“It took courage,” Bryony said again.
Maria turned back.
Her sister bit her lip, but then sped on to get out everything she had to say fast. “Don’t hide behind a mask of respect and responsibility. Love the man. Isn’t your happiness disappearing because you’re so determined to live without him?”
Bryony saw pretty clearly for a girl who made her living behind a mask.
Maria opened the door, almost sick. What if it wasn’t him?
But she knew. Before she touched that doorknob, she knew.
“Merry Christmas,” he said, and he looked like himself—confident, gorgeous, with a hint of unease in his dark gaze.
So she hadn’t forced him to become a man he couldn’t be. “Come in Jake. Come out of the cold.”
Silence stretched between them. All she could think was that he’d returned. He’d had more courage than she. He’d kept trying.
He watched her as she took his hand and pulled him inside. “How do you mean that?”
“The cold of not being together,” she said, “where I think we might belong.”
“What suddenly makes you think that?” he asked.
Her happiness took a dive. “You don’t?”
“It’s what I came to tell you.” His gaze caressed her. She was lucky.
“I have to stop being stubborn,” she said. “And afraid.”
“What scared you so much?”
&
nbsp; “I don’t want to lose myself because I love you.”
“You—” He kissed her swiftly. “Do you love me?”
“I can’t help myself.”
“But why aren’t you happy, Maria? Loving you makes me happy.”
“First you didn’t believe me. Then you interfered every time I asked you not to. I even think you browbeat Helen’s friends into giving me work.”
His skin took on a heated flush, despite the winter air.
“You did,” she said.
“I’d let you starve now,” he said, kindness and husky affection belying his words.
“You didn’t go to the board. And yet you didn’t give up on me. You came here. And you’re not too angry to forgive me for holding out.”
“I’m not an idiot.” He twined their fingers. His were as cold as ice, and she didn’t care. He was all the heat she wanted. “But I should have gone to that board.”
Maria grinned. She tiptoed to kiss his cheek. “You’re more than a man of steel. Do you think you can deny yourself again if I have to make my own decisions?”
“You ask the impossible,” he said with an exaggerated sigh. “We both have a say in what’s right for us. I want it that way, too.”
He kissed her, his hands desperate as he stroked her back and her waist. Maria almost cried. It was so good to hold him again, to feel his muscles flexing against her palms, and the heat of his breath in her mouth. As he slid his hands beneath her breasts, he lifted his head. “Can we talk about marriage sometime soon?”
Her feet didn’t seem to work, and neither did her legs. She felt as if she were hovering above herself.
“I know,” he said, his mouth against her temple. “We hardly know each other. You think I’m a bully because I want to run my loved ones’ lives.”
“You say you aren’t afraid, but I think something scares you into taking control that doesn’t belong to you.”
“Losing,” he said. “I want control so I can make sure I won’t lose anyone who matters to me.”
“Control makes me want to run.”
“So I’m learning to let it go,” he said. “Slowly. For instance, I’m not asking you to marry me today. Take your time. Make certain. I’m just telling you now because all the time in the world, all the days that pass, won’t make me more certain. I love you. When you’re ready—if you’re ready—you tell me.”
She breathed again. “I always insist feelings matter most, but I’ve been giving in to the wrong kind.”
He kissed her forehead, hugging her so close she could hardly speak. She couldn’t—wouldn’t—move away from him. “I’ll never break a promise to you again, Maria.”
“Jake,” she said, slipping to her knees. She expected him to follow, but he stood over her, bewildered. “I can ask you from down here,” she said, “but it’ll be more fun if you join me.”
He knelt in slow motion. “Are you sure?” he asked.
“And terrified. I could live without you,” she said. “But I’d feel empty every day without you in it.”
“You don’t need time to consider?”
“I love you. Love isn’t always safe with you, or wise.” She smiled against his cheek. “But it’s real between us, and I’m grabbing it.” She took his face between her hands. With her lips barely over his, she asked, “Will you marry me?”
He kissed her, claiming her, offering and taking with his mouth and his hands, and making his answer clear.
“I need to hear you say yes,” she said, leaning back.
“Yes.” He took her mouth again, and she forgot her mother and sister and the hard floor beneath her knees.
“Wait.” He slid his hands over her with restless hunger. “We have to tell Leila.”
“Will she see you?”
“She stayed at my house last night. She browbeat me into coming here.”
“Let’s go tell her together. I think she and my sister may be the smarter therapists. Maybe we can start a family practice.” She grabbed her coat and gloves from the hall closet. “Can we tell Mom and Bryony first?”
“Mom?” Jake said. “Your mother’s here? Are you all right?”
“You said something, dear?”
Maria turned just in time to see her mother inspect Jake with her best up-and-down, “what a big boy you are” glance. Clearly, knitting wasn’t doing its job.
Again, the doorbell rang. Maria answered it instead of lecturing her mother on inappropriate come-ons. Gail usually accused her of being envious because she hadn’t mastered the art of flirting.
Leila, hopping from one booted foot to the other, hurried inside. “I couldn’t wait.” She stared from her father to Maria. “You look happy.”
Maria hugged her, as tight as she could, and then turned her around. “Leila, you’d better meet my mother. You’ll be family when your dad and I decide on the right month and day.”
“Will we?”
The celebratory group hug was more like a football scrum, and no one came out untouched. Gail finally staggered to freedom, tidying her hair.
“We need wine,” she said. “I don’t suppose my own dear temperance-minded daughter has a bottle stashed for the holidays?”
“Funny, Mom. Bryony and I drank the tiny bottle we could afford last night.”
“I have champagne,” Jake said. “Come with me to get it, Maria.”
“Leila?” Maria said.
“I’ll stay here and get to know your mother.” They turned as one toward the kitchen. “What are you all cooking? Dad didn’t even buy a turkey.”
“Just champagne?” Gail asked. “I like that guy.”
“There must have been a sale,” Leila said. “My dad’s kind of cheap.”
Maria laughed until Jake stopped her with a kiss. He slid his hands inside her coat. Before long, she wanted to throw it aside.
“No.” He pulled his hands away and urged her toward the door.
She wreaked her revenge as he drove. A chaste kiss on the corner of his mouth turned into insistence that led her fingers to the buttons on his shirt and down to his waistband.
Fortunately, he owned one of the few houses in his neighborhood with an attached garage. A trail of clothes followed them into his kitchen.
The coldness of the granite counter made Maria hiss in shock. Pausing only to undo her bra, Jake slid his palm between her and the stone.
“Come upstairs,” he said, lowering his mouth to her breast. “No more floors.”
“This isn’t a floor. It’s a counter.” She arched into him, begging for now instead of upstairs.
He sighed, holding her head, only to echo her gasp as she found his taut nipple.
“They won’t expect us back for a while,” he said, catching her in his arms.
She wrapped her legs around his waist. “I still don’t need a bed.”
“For everything I want to do to you, a bed will be more comfortable.”
He was a strong man. He carried her up a set of back stairs, to a small room where they saw Christmas morning in with love almost too perfect to believe.
At last they sprawled, Maria on her stomach, Jake lying half across her back, with one leg between hers.
“What will next Christmas bring?” Maria asked.
Jake pushed her hair across her face, and kissed the pulse beating at the side of her throat. “All I need to know is that I’ll wake up with you.”
EPILOGUE
A TINY FIST WAVED in the air, welcoming the next Christmas morning with the sweetest of all greetings. Maria’s infant daughter snuffled a little. “You’re fine.” Maria nuzzled her baby’s nose, wondering if she’d ever look at her without awe. “Daddy’s paying the bill, and then we’ll go home and lock the world out and just be us together.”
Her hospital door burst open, and Leila followed it into her room.
“Where’s your dad?” Maria asked, making room for one more on the bed.
“With your mother. She’s—”
“Doing one of her s
low strolls, gathering an audience,” Bryony said, coming into the room but going straight to the baby. “Isn’t she beautiful? What did you name her?”
“Maria, I wouldn’t leave Dad alone with your mother too often.” Leila pitched her voice low. “Don’t take this personally, but I think Gail’s putting the moves on him.”
“There’s a question that’s been on my mind for some time,” Gail said, sweeping into the room, her hand wrapped like a python around Jake’s forearm. Maybe like a cobra. He couldn’t seem to look away.
“What’s the question, Mom?” Bryony asked.
“Just get it over with,” Maria said, grinning, as she held out her daughter to Leila.
“Are there any more at home like you?” Gail asked Jake.
Maria and Leila and Bryony burst into laughter that startled their sleepy baby. Jake extricated himself from Gail’s clutches as she looked stunned at their mockery.
“What did you name our girl?” Bryony asked again.
“Bryony Leila Gail,” Jake said, standing close enough for Maria to touch him.
Leila turned. Gail grabbed for the bed rail. Bryony burst into tears.
“Now, B.” Jake hugged his sister-in-law, cradling her head on his shoulder.
Maria touched Leila’s cheek. She couldn’t read the younger woman’s wide stare. “You don’t mind that she shares your name? We haven’t signed anything yet.”
“Mind?” Her whisper broke. “She’s my family, my baby sister.” Leila leaned her head against Maria’s. “And I’m proud.”
“You named her after me, too?” Gail sat on the bed. “You named her after me, Maria.”
“I had a hand in it.” Jake held one daughter while leaning down to nuzzle the other.
“Yeah, but you don’t know me,” Gail said.
“I’d do anything to please your daughter.” He kissed his wife. “I trust her judgment.”
“He had the names on the form before I knew we’d agreed. I wanted Christmas.” Maria grinned as every eyebrow in the room cocked. “Carol.”
“Uh-huh.” Leila ignored her completely to nudge her father in the ribs. “I knew you couldn’t change. You still know best.”
“You’re wrong.” His eyes promised Maria everything. Everything she’d ever dreamed of, and all she hoped for in the future. “And it’s lucky for your sister that Maria trusts me, or little Bryony would be stuck with a hokey name.”