by J. Nichole
He unwraps the condom rolling it on while I sit anticipating his next move. He climbs on top of me but doesn't enter me. Instead, he kisses me and rubs between my legs. When his hand becomes unbearable I say, "Josh," and grab his shoulders. He enters me and I close my eyes as he strokes. Both of us taking turns moaning.
My legs wrap around his waist and I squeeze my thighs causing him to lose himself but he keeps stroking until he feels me quiver around him.
He lays beside me and pulls the comforter over both of us. I make myself comfortable on his chest and close my eyes.
My body shakes and I feel around for the blanket. The thick comforter of the bed slid down to my waist. I pull it up to cover my chest and then it goes back down again. I open my eyes and see Josh with a smirk on his face. "You can't sleep all morning." He leans over and kisses my forehead.
The sun shining through the windows brightens the room. “Feels like I just went to sleep." I shut my eyes to block the rays.
"It hasn’t been that long since we fell back asleep." He sits up on the bed beside me. "I had a few other things planned for today. Feel like getting up?"
“Not really,” I groan. I’d rather stay in the room ignoring the reality of our relationship. He rubs the back of his finger across my cheek.
"I could stay in bed all day too." He looks down at my chest. "I'd much rather continue showing you how sorry I am."
A smile spreads across my face. Although I’d rather not think about the circumstances the apology tour is doing wonders for my mood. I’m not as angry as I was when Tanya first told me.
He throws the covers off of us and declares the morning has started. "Let's get moving. This next part is important."
I look at him sideways after looking at the clock. "Where are we going?" I say groggily. "It's still early."
"Breakfast, then we are taking a trip." I sit up against the headboard of the bed as he moves around the room in only his revealing boxer briefs.
My gaze lands on his bulge and I say, "I don't think he's ready to get out of bed either." I crawl across the bed and grab his hand mid-stride. "A few more minutes?"
He picks me up and falls backward with me wrapped in his arms. "Just a few." He kisses my lips and his bulge grows. "But we should be moving soon or we'll have to skip breakfast."
"Skip breakfast?" I sit up and look down at him through my messy hair. "That's blasphemy." I give him one last kiss and then stand up and walk into the bathroom.
"More torture." He calls behind me and I giggle after locking myself in the bathroom.
Chapter Fourteen
The sign reads 'I-10 E', and I look over at Josh and say, "Where are we going exactly?" Considering he drove down from Fort Walton Beach yesterday and is going home tomorrow I assume we aren't going too far. Josh bobs his head to the music and doesn't respond. "I'm glad we stopped for breakfast." I can still smell the maple syrup on my hands. "Those biscuits were everything I needed this morning."
His eyes leave the road and he glares at me. "Everything?"
I snicker. "Not everything." I rest my head on the headrest. "But it gave me the itis. I'll be snoring like you were last night."
"That's a good idea." He smiles. "Take a nap." He nods his head. "Yeah, take a nap and I'll wake you when we arrive."
I cock my eyebrow. The suggestion sounds tempting, but I don't want to leave him hanging on this drive. "Are you sure? Don't need me to keep you awake?"
"Nope." He reaches for the radio and changes the station. "I'll just listen to the news."
I pull my legs into the seat and cozy up against the window. I listen to the news anchors on CNN reporting on news from around the world.
Josh taps my leg and whispers, "We're here." I open my eyes and look around. Looks like a resort of some sort. "Have a good nap?"
"Didn't even feel like I was asleep for long." My lips form into a lazy smile. "What type of resort is this?"
"Resort?" He looks out the window past me. "Does it look like a resort to you?"
I follow his glance and say, "Something like a resort." I watch as a couple crosses the street the guy’s hand wrapped around the woman’s waist. "What city are we in?"
"Your new city." I look at him with my eyebrows stitched together. "Jacksonville."
I look around again and say, "Okay?"
"Well I know you accepted the offer. And after everything I want you to know I will be supportive of you. I want to help you find a place here." I look around again, still confused. "This isn't a resort. It's an apartment complex."
His offer is intriguing but the thought of us being long distance; his being in Fort Walton Beach with Joseline upsets me. With my arms across my chest and my lips twisted I say, "Do you think you can do long distance for a long time?" I look at him and say, "Especially knowing you'll have her around you waiting for me to piss you off?"
“Can’t say I’m ready to be away from you, but I know for sure her being around me should be the least of your worries.”
My mouth opens slightly and I nod my head. "Okay." If only she were truly the least of my worries.
Since accepting the offer I haven't taken the time to determine where I'll live. Looking at apartments is a good idea. “Alright, let’s see what this apartment has to offer.”
After signing in with the apartment manager we go on a guided tour of the one-bedroom apartments. The luxury style apartment makes my apartment in Tallahassee look like a candidate for an HGTV makeover project. I rub my hands against the smooth granite countertops and admire my reflection in the stainless steel double-door refrigerator.
When I catch Josh's eye I mouth to him, "I can't afford this." My starting salary at What's Happening Jacksonville could afford a studio apartment with no upgrades. Granite? Yeah right.
We walk into the bedroom and I spin around in the walk-in closet. I'm tempted to take a seat in the large soaking tub, but I fight the urge. Josh walks up beside me and says, "I'd love to get in there with you."
I turn around and say, "We should probably go somewhere more affordable."
The property manager overhears me and clears her throat. "We truly have comparable rent to most places here in Jacksonville." She waves us over to where she is standing and hands me a sheet of paper. Pointing to the model we are standing in she says, "And the price includes utilities."
"Can we have a minute?” Josh asks. The property manager leaves us in the bedroom. "I saw your offer letter and I wouldn't have brought you here if I didn't think you could afford it. But if you aren't comfortable with the price let's move on to a less expensive place."
Being that I've never managed a salary and monthly expenses I'm not even sure what my range should be for rent. "How much should I expect to pay for rent based on how much I'll be making per month?"
"Your tuition was covered. You have no student loans, right?" I nod my head. "And you didn't open any credit cards or other loans, right?" I nod my head again. "Then you can expect your regular monthly expenditures that you have now. Phone bill, car payment, insurance, food." He counts off each with a raised finger. "And utilities here will be included in the price of rent."
I sigh. "I’m not ready to adult." I look out the window to the swimming pool and say, "I'm sure my dad will warn me if he thinks I'm spending too much though."
We decide to look at a few more places around Jacksonville just to compare. By the time we finish at the last place my stomach is growling. "Let's get something to eat and we can talk about which place you like best." Josh leads us back to the car. "Then we should probably get back on the road."
Over dinner at Copeland's we discuss the different options. "I'm pretty sure the first place is my favorite." I look at Josh as he takes a bite of his étouffée. "What do you think?"
"I also like that one and the lady was right … they are comparable to the other places." He takes another bite. "At least now you can check this off your list and when you're ready, put a hold on the apartment."
"Thanks, Jos
h." When we get into the car I get back into the same position as earlier with my legs pulled up and my head against the window.
"Going to sleep again?" Josh looks at me then changes the radio station. "Guess more news."
With my eyes closed I hear the breaking news announcement. "A verdict has been returned against the cop in the Jace McFadden case. More from Halie with us from Tallahassee." I open my eyes and sit up in the seat. Josh leans over and turns up the volume.
"The jurors deliberated for twelve hours. Only stopping for one request. The transcripts of the witness interviews from the night of the crime."
"This makes me nervous." I take a deep breath. "Every time we have to sit and listen to a verdict in one of these crimes I feel like my heart stops beating."
"I remember that weekend. You were distraught. I drove down to be with you." He looks at me then stops talking. I look out of the window. Jace McFadden was a student at L.U. who was killed near one of the nightclubs. It's suspected that he was a victim of police brutality, and after marching to the governor's mansion the cop involved was arrested for manslaughter.
That day when Josh came into town, Chris made his grand re-appearance. Josh gave me space to make a decision, and I ultimately chose him.
"That was a rough weekend in more ways than one." Josh nods his head in agreement.
"In the case of Cory Roberts the jury finds the defendant guilty." An audible gasp can be heard in the courtroom.
Josh turns the volume down and says, "Wow, I'm happy justice is being served for Jace. We don't see this often."
"Thank God. The community can begin to heal now." I close my eyes again and rest my head on the window. My breathing is calmed as I listen to Halie provide more details about the sentencing of Cory Roberts.
We walk into my apartment, bags in hand. The non-granite kitchen counter is covered in vases of different shapes and sizes. The flowers that Josh brought are camouflaged in the group. Nicole comes out of her room and says, "Glad you're back." She looks between Josh and me, then to the flowers.
"Who are all of these flowers for,” I ask. Nicole bites her lip. I don't wait for her to respond and start moving toward my room.
"They are all for you,” She whispers. Josh turns around to look at her with a pained look in his eyes. When I open my room door I see more vases and various flowers.
"What?" I turn to her and ask, "Who are they from?" I look to Josh and his face is blank. Nicole doesn't respond and I find a vase with a card attached. "Chris," I say aloud. I glare at Nicole. "Did you have anything to do with this?"
Josh sits on the couch with his head on the back of the couch. Nicole stares at him before saying, "I tried to call you."
Nicole stands beside me and says, "I'm sorry." I don't know if she is speaking to Josh or me but I ignore her. Josh looks up and his eyes are glossy. "I'm so sorry." Nicole walks back to her bedroom, and Jennifer's door opens then shuts.
"He always seems to have perfect timing,” Josh says.
I sit beside him and I shrug my shoulders taking a deep breath.
He looks at me and says, "Today was tough for me. I want you to know that I'm okay with you moving to Jacksonville. I want you to go and be great. But it hurts. I'd much rather we be in the same city." He clears his throat. “Especially after my fuck up. I know it’s going to be hard to regain your full trust.”
"And I appreciate that Josh. I do. It wasn't an easy decision to make, but I think it's the best decision I can make." I grab his hand and force him to intertwine our fingers. "Going forward isn’t going to be easy."
"I love you, Laila. I do. But we have too many forces working against us right now." He releases my hand. "I don't think now is the time for me to compete. I need you to know with all of your being that you want to be with me." He looks at the table full of flowers. "If you knew, Chris wouldn't even try to make it work with you." He points to the flowers. "He wouldn't be sending you all these flowers knowing he had zero chance of getting back with you." I stare at the flowers. "If he hears about what’s happened that will only make him push that much harder."
I look away from him. "Do you still talk to him?" He stands up. "Will you be able to consider making us work if he's trying to be with you?" He grabs his bag and walks towards the door.
I don't even attempt to follow him. Everything he said is true. Getting over Josh cheating would have been a challenge alone, without Chris trying to get back with me.
From the door, Josh looks back at me and says, "Like you said Friday night, I think you need time." He rubs his chin. "Take all the time you need. I’ll wait." He walks out of the door and my frustration is divided between Chris and Josh.
I go into my room and dig my phone from out of my purse. Chris answers, "Hey Laila."
"This has to stop. You have to stop interfering in my relationship. You had your chance to make this right. You decided to break up with me. Left me in pieces, but didn’t even tell me a legit reason why." My voice begins to quiver. "Us being friends does not work. You trying to get me back will not work." My voice gets raspy as the tears flow freely. "I've moved on. And if you want me to be happy you'll move on too."
"Laila, I told you I want you back. I'm sorry I'm being selfish and not letting you be with Josh, but it's not supposed to be you and Josh. It's supposed to be you and me."
"That time has gone."
"You have to do what you have to do. But I won't stop trying. If you want to move on, prove it. If I'm not able to reach you anymore I'll know it's truly over." We are both silent.
"Bye Chris." For me it's over. I won't answer his calls anymore. I block his number from my call log and delete his contact information.
Chapter Fifteen
The water from the pool splashes me in the face. I grab my Margarita and scoot farther back in the lounge chair. "This is like heaven," I say as I look out to the shore. We haven't started sailing yet but we have already unloaded our bags in the suite and grabbed our first drink.
Monica tugs at her bikini. "I should have exercised before this trip." Her boobs are overflowing from her top.
"Maybe you just needed a bigger top." Jennifer looks away from Monica to the pool. "Have you seen anyone our age yet?" We watch an older man walk past us with his beer belly pouring over his swim trunks. "They must have run a special at the nursing home."
"I saw a few guys on our floor." Nicole finishes her drink. "Not like any of you are looking for a man." She looks over at me and covers her mouth. "Sorry, Laila."
Jennifer rolls her eyes. "Okay, we aren't going to talk about it after this." She looks me in the eyes. "But how the hell is Josh going to decide he doesn't want a long-distance relationship?" Nicole grumbles beside me. "I mean he wanted you to shut Chris out of your life completely. And you did that." She shrugs. "Then he just decides that wasn't good enough?" With a scowl she says, “I mean shouldn’t he still be groveling after he cheated?”
"Fuck boy." Nicole blurts out. "Just a fuck boy." She pulls her shades off of her eyes. "Had me all emotional after he made his plea for you to leave Chris alone." She snickers. "Had me thinking I should clear my roster and settle down with one dude."
"And now?" Monica looks at Nicole, waiting for her to continue.
Nicole looks at her with a smirk on her face. "I'm glad I shook myself out of that shit." Nicole turns to me. "Since Josh is a fuck boy why not give Chris a second chance?"
"If he cared about me, I feel he would have let things play out on their own. Not interfere." The boat whistle blows and we are called to the deck for the Muster Drill. We grab our life vests and head to our assigned spot.
Nicole nudges me while we are in line and says, "I won't say anything else about Chris but after the last secret I kept from you I vowed to myself I wouldn't do that again." I turn around to look at her. "He's been blowing my phone up. I told him you're done and he should stop trying."
"He should." I nod my head. "Just block his number too."
"He's going to be in
town when we get back. Says he has to see you one last time."
I groan and shake my head. "Thanks for telling me. This time." We are dismissed from the drill and walk back to our room to return the life vests.
Beside our room, a guy is shimmying while the guy next to him is yelling out, 'Yo baby yo.' Jennifer looks at Nicole with a wide grin on her face. As if she didn't have Derrick back at home making plans for their move back to Texas.
Monica taps my arm and says, "Does that remind you of Josh?" Josh pledged Kappa to follow in his father's footsteps. But he wasn't as flashy as these guys. Most people wouldn't even know he was a Kappa.
"I'm trying hard not to think about him." I walk into the room and sit on the bed.
Monica says, "Alright, we won't say anything else about him the entire trip. And hopefully, those dudes will settle down." She pulls her suitcase from under the bed. "I need to change out of this top. It's uncomfortable." She rummages through her bag and changes her top. She looks at the tag of the top she removed and then throws it at me. I take a look at the tag and we both erupt in laughter. "Girl, no wonder my boobs were falling out of that thing." Monica's boobs will never squeeze into a size small. They were trying, but they just couldn't make it happen.
Nicole and Jennifer walk through the door, cheesing like two Cheshire cats. "Alright here's the deal." Nicole puts her hands in the air. "For this spring break our goal is to be pissy drunk, black out..." Jennifer nods her head. "Run around naked..." Jennifer stops nodding. "And have sex with a random guy." Jennifer's head swivels around to look at Nicole.
"Maybe the pissy drunk part, but I pass on the running around naked and having sex with a random guy." I look at Nicole as she contemplates my rebuttal.
"Alright, we'll see how you feel after you're pissy drunk." She laughs. "Those guys." She points to the door. "Have more friends with them. They said to meet them by the pool in thirty minutes."
Monica looks down at her shirt and says, "I'll sit by the pool. I think the girls had enough exposure for one day."