by H. M. Ward
Reaching up, I take the knob in my hand and twist. When the door swings open, I gag from the smell and stagger back, nearly falling down the staircase. My hand flies over my mouth and muffles my scream.
Neil.
Blood.
Cecily.
Their naked bodies are tangled together and lifeless. The pristine mattress and blankets are covered in old blood and the smell has me ready to vomit. I stand there for a moment, holding my stomach, bent over. My hair dangles in my face obscuring the person next to me. It’s not until he speaks that I move.
“Did you forget about me? Because I have not forgotten about you.” Victor is standing next to me with a hideous grin on his lips. He gazes at the dead couple on the bed. “I thought you’d never come back. Thank God for small miracles, because I owe you big time.”
Sean’s voice echoes through my mind. He won’t underestimate you again.
I don’t know what to do. I’m unarmed and Victor has a gun in his belt and a knife in his hand. His silver blade is clean even though I’m sure that’s why there’s so much blood. “You killed them.” I manage to choke out the words. My palms are on the wall, sliding along it, trying to not fall.
“It looks like some of my older work.” He surveys the bed and grins. “It’s personal, that’s for fucking certain. The cops will wonder what kind of person did this, and they’re going to assume it was you. You see, since your fiancée was banging this old lady, I killed an extra person. She wasn’t part of the plan, but the woman saw me and right now everyone thinks I’m dead—thanks to you. I have to say that was a massive favor, sliding that blade across my neck. Everyone thought I was pushing up daisies somewhere, but you,” he laughs and points his knife at my throat, “you didn’t bury the blade in my neck, so here I am.” He steps toward me. Before I can react, his knife comes into contact with my shoulder. I scream and pull away. The movement throws me off balance and before I can regain my footing, Victor pushes me. I go flying backwards down the staircase, slamming my head, shoulder, and face as I bounce down the steps.
I’m yelling at him, and trying to get to my feet, but he’s faster than I am, and unharmed. The back of my head stings. I touch it and my fingers come away covered in blood.
“Get up.” Victor kicks at me. “You’re not some pampered ass little princess. Fight back.”
“Leave. Go away right now and no one will ever know that you were here.” I hold my shoulder, trying to stop the flow of blood as I stand. My head spins and the room tilts to the side. I’m going to die.
The man laughs. “And have you talk? Do I look dumb? The thing I can’t believe is you saw firsthand what happens to a bitch that disappoints me. You have no idea what hell you’re about to live through, do you? I’m going to make this long and slow.”
“The neighbors will come. They’ll hear me.” I take a step back.
“The neighbors are ancient and can’t hear jack shit without their hearing aids, which have gone missing. It’s been a few days now, but I bet we have a few more to play around before anyone comes looking.”
My body is covered in sweat and my mind is telling me to run, but my body wants to fight. The conflict is making it difficult to move, that and the blood pouring down my arm. “Where’s Maggie?”
Victor grins showing off his gold tooth. “Where do you think? That bitch was good in bed, but loose lips aren’t becoming. I took care of her. Too bad you weren’t around to stop me this time.” Without warning, he throws the knife in his hand. It flies by my ear and buries in the wall.
I shriek and whirl around, grabbing the first thing I see—Neil’s chair. Victor is pulling his gun out, so he can’t block my swing. I hurl the chair around in a fury and hear wood crack as it comes into contact with his body. Victor swears and the gun flies across the room and into the kitchen. As soon as the chair is out of my hands, I race for the door, but Victor grabs me.
We roll for a moment, and then he pins me to the floor. “You’re not getting away this time, you fucking whore.” His fist connects with my cheek and pain explodes behind my eye. I try to twist out of his grip, but I can’t move. “You ready, slut? Things are going to get interesting.”
Before I know what’s happening, he pulls down my sweatpants. I’m not wearing panties because I didn’t have extra clothes at Bryan’s house. Victor continues, “I knew it. Fucking cunt. This part is fun. Have I told you that I prefer this area to be nice and smooth? How about a shave?”
I shake my head furiously, pleading incoherently.
“Fine, then we’ll do it this way.” He pulls out a lighter and flicks it. The thing flames to life. Victor keeps me pinned with one arm while his hand inches closer and closer to the hairy patch between my legs. As soon as the lighter touches the hair, the entire section catches fire. I scream and writhe, trying to get away from him, but I can’t move. Tears flow down my cheeks as he watches my bush burn. He waits a moment, letting me shout out in pain, and then grabs me—crushing the fire with his hand.
“Let me go.” I manage.
“Beg me not to fuck you senseless.” His dark eyes lock on mine. “Do it.” He moves his hand and a finger slips into me. He pushes hard and I scream.
We’ve shifted and I hadn’t noticed. I take the shot, knowing it’s the only one I’m going to get. My heel launches straight into his junk. Victor curls into a ball as I yank my pants up and run out of the house.
My heart is pounding so hard it feels like it’s going to explode. I race past Bryan’s car and don’t look back. But I hear Victor behind me, getting closer and closer. I wanted to stay in a public area, but no one seems to be out. I run until I can’t breathe. My lungs are on fire. I didn’t think about where I was going, but I realize it when I see Bryan jump out of a car before it fully stops.
He rushes toward me. “Hallie!”
“No! Bryan, go!” I try to tell him, but I can barely speak. I crash into him, unable to breathe. He hands me off to Sean and walks toward my house. “No!” I scream and try to pull away.
Time stops. Victor steps into the middle of the street, gun pulled and aimed straight at me. He cocks it, and ignores Bryan until he can’t.
“If you want her, you’re going to have to kill me first.” Bryan’s voice is level and strong. He’s holding a gun, already cocked, straight at Victor’s face.
“That cunt’s not worth dying for.”
“That’s where you’re wrong.” Bryan fires and the shot rings out. There’s an echo and at the last second Victor repositions his gun, but he falls to the ground.
Sean is holding onto my waist as I try to claw away from him. I’m screaming his name, watching the man I love fall to the earth in slow motion.
“It wasn’t an echo!” I kick free from Sean and rush to Bryan.
Before I get there his body crumples to the ground. His eyes see me one last time before they roll back and stare at the sky. Blood flows from his chest, soaking his shirt and flowing onto the ground. “No, no, no! Make it stop! Sean! Help me!” I clutch Bryan’s head and weep as life bleeds out of him.
“Love you. Always loved you.” Bryan’s voice is so weak, so filled with pain that it cuts me in half.
“I love you, too. Always have.” I smile down at him and a peaceful look spreads across his face. Bryan becomes limp in my arms as I stroke his head and tell him that it will be okay.
Everything will be okay.
Chapter 12
Police lights flash around us, and I don’t understand what they’re saying. Someone is pulling me away while another cop takes Bryan’s gun. “Run the numbers on that.”
“Yes sir.” He takes the weapon and disappears.
Sean is standing over us, stiff and silent.
A cop asks if we were engaged. He found a ring on the ground. I don’t answer. I can’t answer. My voice has been sucked away and there are no words.
The voices around me are a blur of noise until Sean speaks. “No, it was mine.”
“Mr. Ferro, this we
apon was used in another homicide.”
I glance over because Sean sits down hard. He says a name—a woman’s name—like it’s a blessing and a curse. He breathes in deeply and rubs his eyes before looking at his cousin with a strange smile on his face. “You fucking idiot.”
I don’t understand. “What are you talking about?” Sean won’t answer, he just shakes his head. His eyes are hard and unfeeling. I want to scream at him, but I can’t.
A cop answers me. “This is the gun that killed Amanda Ferro.”
Chapter 13
Consumed by shock and emotional overload, I can’t process what he’s telling me. I blink at him. “What?”
“They couldn’t find the weapon during the trial, but everyone thought Sean Ferro killed her.” Sean has walked away, his shoulders stiffen with each word and I know he can hear. Grief is tearing through me¸ but something feels wrong.
“I don’t understand.” I wipe the tears off my face and smear them across my cheek. “What are you saying?”
“I’m saying what it looks like, Miss Raymond. Although we can’t be entirely conclusive at this point, it points the blame for that murder in another direction. It looks like Bryan Ferro shot Amanda, and for whatever reason Sean willingly took the blame.” The cop is old enough to remember the trial. He stares after Sean with respect in his eyes. It’s not the typical animosity that people offer when they see the man. They think he’s a heartless monster and Sean’s become that person. In Bryan’s bedroom I’d seen old pictures of the boys when they were young. Sean smiled then and his eyes didn’t have that hollow, creepy thing they have now. It’s like he’s been carrying around a massive secret and I can’t bear to think that this cop is telling me the truth. Bryan is dead because of me. He walked straight into the line of fire to protect me, so why the hell would he kill Sean’s wife? I straighten and turn to look at Sean.
He’s rigid and trembling, trying to walk away, but he keeps looking over his shoulder until he stops and turns. Arms folded over that strong chest, he stares at his cousin’s lifeless body with a look that walks the line between disdain and admiration.
I can’t stand it. Something inside of me breaks. In a rage of tears and fury, I jump up and race toward him, screaming wildly. When I collide into his chest, he barely moves but it doesn’t stop me from throwing punches. I connect my fist with his rock hard side once, before he grabs my wrist. Yanking me close, he hisses in my face, “You’re not the only one grieving right now.”
I pull my arm away and nearly stumble backward. The cops watch us, but no one intercedes since Sean seems calm. He may be steady, but I’m not. I knew Bryan wouldn’t be with me much longer but Sean stole the few extra minutes we had, and then this—the humiliation. In his death, Bryan will be slandered and accused of a murder there’s no way he committed. I hiss up at Sean, “It’s a lie. He didn’t kill her.”
“How would you know?” Sean’s voice is cold and detached, although his gaze lingers on Bryan as they shift his body to a black bag.
I glance over at him and fall to my knees sobbing. “He wouldn’t have been here tonight if you didn’t make me break things off with Neil! This is your fault! You told him! He wouldn’t have come if you didn’t tell him about Victor!” I pound the pavement with my hands until they’re raw and bleeding. Sean doesn’t answer, which makes me furious. “Admit it!” I’m in his face again, speaking in a death whisper. “Bryan wouldn’t have died tonight if it wasn’t for you.”
Two words. That’s all he says. “You’re right.”
I start sobbing again and let out a scream. By now there’s a police line and paramedics. The EMTs try to look at me, but I can’t leave Bryan. When they zip the bag shut, I beg them to stop. “He’ll be all right.” I claw the guy’s arm as he zips the bag. “Please stop! I can’t do this again! I can’t! He’ll be all right! He has to be!”
Sean pulls me away and smashes me to his chest. His eyes are glassy, but there’s not a single tear shed. I hate him. I rip away from his grip and spit on his face. Sean doesn’t move to wipe it off. People watching us are holding out cameras. That’s when I feel a hand on my shoulder.
I turn around, expecting it to be a cop, but it’s not. A wall of red hair greets me with a sad smile. “I told you I’d be there for you. Why didn’t you call me?”
Chapter 14
Maggie takes hold and hugs me hard, letting me fall apart in her embrace. She whispers nonsense and strokes the hair off my face.
She helps the paramedics get me into an ambulance to look me over. When I sit down, I wince. The guy is young, but he realizes what it means. He calls for a female worker and a cop comes over. She’s a tiny thing, and her gaze is sympathetic. “Honey, I need to talk to you.” She climbs into the bus and closes one of the doors so that no one else can hear. “Did Victor Campone rape you?”
I don’t know what to say. Shaking my head, I tell her what happened. It feels so long ago even though the burns on my skin are fresh. I haven’t felt them until now. “My skin burns.”
“Let me get someone to check you, then. We need to see how the burns are so we can treat them. Okay, honey? You’ve been through enough tonight. Let them help you.” The cop is watching me with pity in her eyes. She sees the ring on my hand. I put it back there without thinking. They assumed I was engaged to Bryan. They don’t know about Neil and Cecily yet, so I tell them. Her eyes go wide and she talks quickly into her shoulder. I add, “I think he went into the surrounding homes as well. Please check on them. Mr. Thom was always nice to me.” I start balling again when I realize that Victor may have killed him too.
A medic is by me, but I can’t calm down. “Who’s your next of kin?” The medic keeps asking, which makes me cry more. No one. I’m alone.
Maggie says soothing words and tries to calm me down. I hold her hand like a frightened child and look up at her. She smiles up at me. “I’m not going anywhere. We’re in this together. I told you.”
“Maggie is my next of kin.” I point at her and sign something. They start to ask her how to treat me since I’m not coherent. I ramble and cry when I should say something. The police try to ask me questions, but the more they ask the faster I fall apart. It’s Sean who puts a stop to it.
His loud voice booms from the other side of the door. “I saw the shooting. Ask me. Miss Raymond has been through enough for tonight.”
“We need more information.”
Sean’s voice drops. He says something I can’t make out, but it ends with, “Her lawyer is here and if you want to play nice, I suggest you show some compassion right now. She won’t forget this night. None of the details will fade from her mind. Leave her alone for now.”
Maggie is watching me on the gurney. I’m laying down because sitting hurts. I wonder how much skin I have left and what this will do to me. I’ll be scarred forever in one of the most intimate places on my body, but I can’t manage to care. I keep thinking about Bryan in that cold bag. The hysterical sobbing starts again and Maggie asks them to give me something.
A needle is shoved into my arm. Maggie sings softly, as she strokes my forehead. Suddenly my eyelids feel like lead. They flutter as I try to keep them open. Sean appears between blinks and asks about me. With Maggie’s consent, they tell him what Victor did to me. He doesn’t say a word. The man just stares at me like I’m a piece of trash, like his cousin’s life wasn’t worth this.
“He loved me.” The words sound strong and proud in my mind, but they fall over my lips as a whisper.
“Without a doubt.” Sean replies and stands there, watching me fall asleep.
Epilogue
The wind cuts through my coat as I walk to the grave, my bundle close to my chest. I shouldn’t be here, but I had to come. I’m drawn here every few months. I have to talk to him and this seems like the place to do it. Bryan promised he’d always be with me, and although I know he is, it’s still hard. The baby is asleep in my arms, indifferent to the chill in the air. I have him bundled from head to to
e and hold onto him tight.
Since the night Bryan died, so many things have happened. I felt so alone without him, or so I thought until a few weeks after Bryan’s death. A pregnancy test affirmed my suspicion and I carried a baby boy to term. He has bright green eyes, just like his daddy. He’s my life now. Maggie, the baby and I live together, an unlikely but content family. I still write—a bleeding heart never heals and the pages call to me. Writing gives me peace when things get unbearable.
I stop in front of my father’s grave first and tell him about his grandson. “I gave him my name, Dad. Well, your name. I don’t want them to know about him. If they find out…” That’s my biggest fear. What if the Ferros find out about little Bryan Raymond? What if they find out he’s the only son of Bryan, the youngest heir to that fucking fortune? They’ll take him from me. I know they will. So I gave him my name and when the papers asked, I said he was Neil’s. That we were getting married. The papers ran wild with articles about Neil and me, depicting us as a modern day Romeo and Juliet. They couldn’t have been further from the truth. Meanwhile, Bryan was linked to the murder of Amanda Ferro and another man they found in the woods. The gun had been used several times. Bryan wasn’t a murderer. The only person he ever killed was Victor, and he did it to save me. I don’t care what forensics say. Eventually, I stopped reading articles about him. During his trail, the way they’d written about Sean was horrible, but the way they slandered Bryan was far worse. I avoid newspapers and stay off of Huffington Post. I live in a bubble with Maggie and my baby.
After talking to Daddy, I risk it. The cemetery isn’t exactly bursting with visitors today. It’s too cold. I walk over to Bryan’s tomb, a huge mausoleum with FERRO marked on the outside. Originally, the family wasn’t going to allow him to be buried with them, but Sean fought them on it, so here he is—my lost love. I lean against the heavy door, pushing it mostly closed. I don’t want anyone to know I was here, so I keep it dark inside, lit only by what sunshine can make its way through the door. It’s overcast today, so it’s darker than usual. I shift baby Bryan in my arms as he wakes up. He smiles up at me with the same grin his daddy wore so many times before.