by Maria Duffy
At first, Donna had been by her side almost every day. But as time had passed, her visits had whittled down to once a week – every Wednesday. It was too difficult to be there all the time. Too heartbreaking. Tina was able to do basic stuff for herself, like wash or dress, but when Donna would sit with her, she’d just look at her with glazed eyes and not a flicker of recognition.
Donna’s trip to Australia had been a desperate attempt to engage Tina – to get her interested in life again. She’d sent postcards from every place she’d visited and Jan had made a promise that she’d bring them in to Tina and read them out to her. The trip had been Tina’s dream so Donna had hoped that the combination of seeing the pictures and hearing all about the places would have stimulated her. It hadn’t worked. Nothing had worked and Donna had resigned herself to having a sister who wasn’t engaged with life.
‘Sorry for disturbing you.’ The booming voice of Doctor Hamilton startled her and she jumped up from the chair.
‘How is she?’
‘She’s doing well, but she needs rest for now. She’s sleeping and there’s a good chance she won’t wake until morning so I’d suggest you take yourself off home.’
Donna shook her head. ‘There’s no way I’m leaving. I want to be here when she wakes up. I’ve waited for too long for this.’
He looked at her over his tiny glasses. His eyes were kind. ‘It’s going to be a long road, Donna, so you need to look after yourself too. At least go off and get yourself something to eat. We can ring you if she wakes.’
She hesitated for a moment and then relented. ‘Okay. I won’t be longer than a couple of hours. And I’ll have my mobile with me all the time so please let me know if there’s any further news.’
As if on cue, Bob rushed in the door. ‘Sorry, the parking out there is a nightmare. What’s happening? How’s Tina?’
‘She’s good,’ said Donna. ‘Really good. But I’ll tell you all on the way out. Thanks again, Doctor Hamilton.’
‘So are you telling me I’ve now got to squeeze back out of that parking spot that I spent twenty minutes squeezing into? I thought we’d be here for ages.’
Donna laughed. ‘Come on, I’ve loads to tell you. Let’s go and get a bite to eat – that’s if you’re not in a rush?’
He linked her as they walked down the corridor. ‘Of course not. I’m really happy for you, Donna. This is the best news ever.’
‘It is, isn’t it? It makes you think anything is possible.’
Bob nodded. ‘Well, it is – if you put your mind to it.’
Donna stopped walking suddenly and checked the time on her phone. Ten to seven. Her head began to spin and a ball of excitement rose in her stomach. ‘Anything is possible,’ she whispered to herself.
‘What was that?’ said Bob. ‘And why have we stopped?’
‘What time are Will and Silvia going to the airport?’
‘I think Mam said they were going around seven. Why?’
‘Right, come on.’
‘What? Where are we going?’
‘To the airport.’ She began to run and Bob followed.
‘Hang on a sec. Why do you want to go there? Are you planning a big showdown? A fight to the death for your man?’
He laughed but then he saw the serious look on her face.
‘Oh my God, Donna. Are you really going to try and stop him from going?’
They burst out the front door and Donna had to stop to catch her breath. ‘No, Bob. I’m not going to try and stop him, but I’m going to tell him how I feel. I never got the chance and I think I’ll always regret it if I don’t say something.’
‘Well, what are we waiting for then?’
Donna followed him out to the car, her head awhirl with thoughts of Tina and of Will. If life had taught her one thing, it was to have no regrets. She just hoped she wouldn’t regret what she was about to do!
Chapter 47
They got a spot easily enough in Dublin’s Terminal 2 car park and took the lift to Departures.
‘I’m not sure this is a good idea any more,’ said Donna, as they stepped out of the lift into the shiny new terminal. ‘Maybe we should just go.’
‘Don’t be crazy, Donna. We’re here now. We may as well see if we can find them at least.’
She hesitated. ‘I … I don’t know. I think I was full of adrenaline from everything that’s happened today. I wasn’t thinking straight.’
‘Listen,’ said Bob, swinging her around to look at him. ‘Do you love him?’
‘Well, yes. You know I do.’
‘Really love him? Completely head over heels in love with him?’
She nodded.
‘Right, you’ll never get this chance again. Just tell him. Tell him how you feel. If you let him fly to the other side of the world without telling him, you’ll regret it. And even if you don’t get the response you’re looking for, at least you’ll know.’
Donna hugged him, feeling her earlier buzz return. ‘You’re right. Now let’s go and find them.’
They ran to the Qantas check-in area, hoping to find them there, but there was no sign. Her confidence was beginning to wane again and she was torn between really wanting to see Will and wanting to forget about him and go back to Tina.
‘What now?’ Bob was on his tippy-toes trying to see over the heads of the crowd. ‘Should we see if we can get his name announced on the loudspeaker?’
Donna sighed. ‘I’m not sure, Bob. It seems a bit extreme.’
‘Departure gates, then?’
‘Good idea,’ said Donna, looking to see where they were. ‘And that’s definitely our last chance. If they’re not there, we’ve missed them and I’ll just have to accept that it’s the end.’
They rushed to the gates and scanned their eyes over the people in the queue. Donna’s heart sank. It looked like their journey was in vain. It just wasn’t meant to be. She thought about Tina and how she used to advise her. How she used to be the one with the sensible head whereas Donna was the hot-headed one. She realised at that moment that she couldn’t be sad. Her sister was way more important than all of this and she closed her eyes and gave thanks for the wonderful gift of getting her back.
‘Donna? Bob? What are you doing here?’
They both swung around and Donna’s jaw dropped open when she saw Will standing in front of them. She felt completely tongue-tied as she looked into those melting brown eyes. Bob nodded encouragement at her and stepped away.
‘So what brings you here?’ he repeated. That dimple on his cheek.
‘I … I just wanted to see you,’ she began. She glanced at Bob, who gave her the thumbs up. She took a deep breath.
‘Will, I need to say this to you. I know you’re with Silvia now and I know—’
‘Donna, I—’
‘Just let me finish. This isn’t easy but I have to say it. I love you, okay? I’m in love with you.’ Heat rose up from her neck and she could tell she was getting that red rash she got when she was nervous. ‘I have been since that day we met in Christchurch. I know you’re moving to the other side of the world and planning to get married, but I just had to tell you.’
Will’s eyes opened wide and he began to speak but Donna shot him down again.
‘I don’t want to cause you any trouble and I know you and Silvia love each other but I just wanted to let you know in case there’s a chance for us. Not today, obviously, because you’re moving to Perth. But in the future … just so you know …’ She was aware she was babbling and she wanted the earth to open up and swallow her.
‘Can I speak now?’ Will asked, a twinkle in his eye.
‘Em, yes, of course. Sorry.’
‘I love you too.’
‘Wh— what?’
‘I love you, Donna. Right from that day in Christchurch too. Something magical happened then and I haven’t been able to get you out of my head ever since.’
‘But Silvia. You sent her to warn me off.’ She suddenly realised there was no sign of the ot
her woman. ‘And where is she anyway?’
‘She’s gone, Donna.’
‘Gone?’
‘Yes, she’s gone back to Perth. I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t leave.’
Donna’s head was in a spin. ‘But she told me … she said …’
‘I didn’t send her, Donna. She saw your text before I did. She answered it and deleted it before I saw it. I had no idea she went to see you. And she most definitely wasn’t speaking on my behalf.’
Donna gasped. She knew there was a reason she’d taken a dislike to that woman. Imagine doing something so awful.
‘I thought you hadn’t texted so I took it that you weren’t interested,’ he continued. ‘And Silvia was making all these plans and I suppose I got carried away with them.’
‘But when did you change your mind? How did you find out what she’d done?’ Donna felt as though she was floating on air.
‘I almost didn’t,’ he said, shaking his head. ‘We were here before the check-in desk was open so we went for a coffee. Silvia was in great form but something didn’t feel right to me.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘I think I knew in my heart I was doing the wrong thing. I suppose I was doing what I’d always done – getting carried away by somebody else’s plans and not following my own heart.’
‘And then?’ Donna was hanging on his every word.
‘Silvia was full of chat. She was saying how delighted she was about us making a new life over there. She said she’d even forgive me for going behind her back to meet you. I hadn’t told her about that so it got me thinking.’
‘And you asked her about it?’
He nodded. ‘She admitted what she’d done eventually but she said she only did it for us. She knew we were meant to be together and she didn’t want my judgement being clouded by memories of the past.’
‘And was it clouded – your judgement, I mean?’
He looked at her then and smiled. It was the sweetest, most beautiful smile she’d ever seen. He took her hand and kissed it gently.
‘On the contrary. I think I’m seeing clearly now for the first time ever.’ Then his smile faded and it was replaced by a serious look. ‘But what about Bob? He’s my cousin. How is he going to feel about this?’
‘Em, sorry for butting in,’ said Bob, who’d obviously been listening to the whole exchange. ‘But Donna and I are just friends. Nothing more.’ And then he added, ‘And I’m not gay.’
‘Well, I’m glad you cleared that up!’ Will laughed, looking from Bob back to Donna. ‘So it looks like there’s no reason why we shouldn’t kiss, then?’
‘Well, you can pause that for just a second while I make myself scarce.’ Bob hugged Donna and clapped Will on the back. ‘I’ll leave her in your capable hands, Will. I need to rush off. There’s a certain girl I have to see.’
‘Good luck with that,’ said Donna, before turning back to Will. ‘Now where were we …?’
Dublin Maternity Hospital
18 months later
‘Look at his tiny fingers,’ said Donna, as she clutched her newborn to her breast. ‘I can’t believe he’s actually here.’
Will kissed her full on the lips. ‘You’re amazing, do you know that? I’ve never seen anything like it. How that came out of down there is beyond me.’
‘Don’t call him that!’ Donna slapped him playfully. ‘He has a name, you know.’
‘How could I forget? George Cooper-Smith.’ Tears sprang to his eyes as he looked at Donna. ‘Thanks, love.’
‘For what?’
‘For everything. For my son, for the name, for it all. Thanks for persevering. I’m the happiest man alive, you know.’
‘And I’m the happiest woman.’ Donna gently took the sleeping baby from her breast and placed him in the cot beside her bed. She watched his little chest rise and fall and knew her life was complete. A gorgeous baby and engaged to her soul mate. She glanced at the beautiful peridot engagement ring on her finger and her heart swelled with pride. Will had chosen it himself and she adored it.
‘Hellooooo! Can I come in?’
Donna smiled as Bob popped his head around the door. ‘Come on in quickly, before the nurse sees you.’
‘Ah, look at him,’ said Bob, peering into the cot. ‘He’s adorable.’
‘Just like his daddy,’ said Will, standing up to hug his cousin. ‘Where’s Lexie?’
‘Nappy changing. She’ll be here in a sec.’ And on that note, Lexie burst in the door, a baby in one arm and a baby bag the size of a suitcase on the other.
‘Trust you to disappear at the sniff of a nappy, Bob. Hiya, Donna. Give me a look. God, he’s gorgeous. He’s the image of you except for the hair.’ She dropped her bag on the floor and bent over the bed to hug her friend. ‘This little one has been grizzly all day. She’s driving me mad.’
Donna offered a finger to the baby and she instantly clutched it. Emma was just six weeks old and although unexpected, the news of Lexie’s pregnancy had been welcomed by the newly loved-up couple. And with Donna falling pregnant just weeks later, it seemed that everything had fallen perfectly into place.
There was another knock on the door and a bunch of blue helium balloons appeared in the room. Donna squealed with delight when she saw who was behind them. ‘Tina! I’m so happy you came. Come and meet your new baby nephew.’
‘I wouldn’t have missed it for the world.’ Tina edged closer to the cot and peered in. Tears pricked her eyes. ‘Beautiful. He’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.’
Donna clutched her hand. ‘We did okay, you and me, didn’t we?’
Tina nodded. ‘Not too bad at all.’
‘Sorry for butting in,’ said Lexie, looking at the baby’s cot and scrunching up her nose. ‘But couldn’t you afford a new teddy? I mean, that one’s a bit mangy, isn’t it?’
‘Hey, leave Cookie alone,’ said Will, bending over and cupping his hands protectively over the teddy. ‘He’s been on a journey. It’s been tough on him.’
‘Here, Lexie. Stick Emma in the cot beside George and we’ll get a picture of the two of them together.’ Donna reached over to the locker to get her iPhone. ‘We can use it as a bribe when they’re wayward teens.’
‘Great idea.’ Lexie gently placed her little girl in the cot beside George. ‘Oh my God. Look how adorable they are together!’
Will shook his head. ‘I have the strangest feeling of déjà vu. It’s weird.’
‘It’s magical, is what it is,’ said Donna, beaming. ‘Just magical.’
Acknowledgments
In 1996, my husband, Paddy, and I headed off on an adventure of a lifetime. We took career breaks from our safe, pensionable jobs, threw caution to the wind, and booked ourselves on a trip that would see us visit some of the most wonderful places in the world. Just before we left, I bought myself a little black-covered notebook and starting with Day 1, I documented the whole, year-long trip. If you’ve already read the book before skipping to the acknowledgments (I bet most of you haven’t!), you’ll know that a large part is set in Australia and New Zealand. It’s been nineteen years since that trip, but I think I always knew I’d write about these places one day.
That brings me to the first and most important person I have to thank – my husband, Paddy. After working at various jobs in the first few months of our trip, the real adventure began when we bought a twenty-year-old car and a two-man tent in Perth and set off driving around Australia. And I’m telling you now – if you can live huddled up with someone in a ridiculously small tent while being eaten alive by insects and fending off hurricanes, then you know you’ve found the one! Paddy has always been the one. He’s supported me in everything I’ve tried to do over the years – the failures, the successes – he’s always been there with a comforting hug or a whoop of joy. He understands the craziness that comes from a writer when trying to meet a deadline or deal with writer’s block and he’ll calmly take over in the house, leaving me to write in peace. This book was by
far the most enjoyable one for me to write and that’s mainly because of the memories that came flooding back to me about that special time we had together before we began the next chapter of our lives.
And that brings me to the next chapter – my children. When we’d driven right around Australia and our car finally gave up and practically blew up in the middle of the road, we knew it was almost time to say good-bye to our travels. And that’s when I discovered I was pregnant with my first child. It was perfect. It meant that we couldn’t be sad coming home because we had something so much more special to look forward to. And so the years of rearing my children began. Eoin, Roisin, Enya, and Conor are the most special people in my life. I burst with pride every day because of them and I know how unbelievably lucky I am to have them. Each one of them play a huge part in my writing, whether it’s keeping me going with tea and biscuits, reading a section for me to tell me if it works, or just giving me a plain old hug. They inspire me every day and I love them with all my heart.
Two of my biggest cheerleaders are my parents, Aileen and Paddy Chaney, and I owe them a huge thanks for all their support. In July 2018 they’ll be celebrating their sixty-third wedding anniversary and I just want to say I love them with all my heart and am proud to be their daughter. Thanks to my brother and friend, Gerry Chaney, for his love, support, and his genius photo-taking! As a photographer, he understands my need for me to pretend I’m far younger than I am and he obliges by erasing a few wrinkles from my pictures. Thanks to his wife, Denyse Chaney, for being the sister I never had and for cheering me on endlessly, even when I hit a brick wall and the words won’t come. Denyse is the one who first reads my books before even my editor sees them and her advice is invaluable. Thank you to my in-laws and a special word must go to my mother-in-law, Mary Duffy, who was a huge support to me. We sadly lost her last year and we all miss her very much.