Our Darkest Maze

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by Sarah Bailey


  Aurora Knox.

  I didn’t know what to fucking think any longer. She wasn’t wrong about me manhandling her and here I was doing it yet again as if I couldn’t stay away no matter how hard I tried. I could blame my hangover for my lack of self-control, but she’d rubbed me up the wrong way. Inserted herself into my life for no reason. Then again, I had been the one to go after her in the first place, like a fucking moth to a flame. I’d needed to know why she was looking at me. And I still needed to know. She hadn’t explained it last night.

  Nothing about this girl, this situation and my reaction made any sense to me whatsoever.

  “What do you want?” she murmured as if talking any louder would break the odd moment.

  “Why were you staring at me last night?”

  She blinked. I realised I was still holding her arm but I didn’t let go.

  “That’s what you want to know?”

  “Yes.”

  It bugged the hell out of me.

  “It’s a pity I don’t feel like answering you then, isn’t it?”

  I should’ve expected her response, but it didn’t stop me from pressing her against the wall and getting up in her face.

  What are you doing?

  “You’re going to answer because I said so.”

  “You don’t get to make demands of me.”

  I raised an eyebrow as I placed both hands next to her head and leant down towards her.

  “Don’t I? Did you forget you sought me out today?”

  “As if it gives you any right to order me around.”

  I smiled.

  “I think you want to be ordered around.”

  What the hell are you saying right now, Logan?

  I had no fucking clue what was going through my head, only my mouth wasn’t catching up with my brain. It was running itself off. I could no longer stop nor prevent the inevitable fallout from this conversation.

  “Excuse me?”

  “You heard me, Aurora Knox. This tough girl act doesn’t fly with me. You’re still a child and that makes you unworthy of my time or attention.”

  She spluttered.

  You say that, Logan, but why the fuck are you giving her your attention right now?

  Because I was a crazy idiot, that’s why. This girl made my blood boil. In more ways than one judging by the way I reacted to her proximity.

  “I am not a child.”

  “No? I think the law says otherwise.”

  “You keep saying you don’t want to be around me and yet here you are pinning me against the wall after I tried to leave. I’m finding it hard to believe you see me as a child.”

  I bit back a retort. She was right. The rational thing to do would have been to let her go. I hadn’t done anything rational today. In fact, I think my common sense had died alongside all the alcohol I’d imbibed last night.

  “Perhaps I’m keeping you around to put you in your place, you ever consider that?”

  “Oh, because you’re doing such a good job of it. I’m so scared of you right now. Here I am, quaking in my shoes.”

  My hand curled into a fist against the wall. Right then, I didn’t know if I wanted to strangle her or shut her smart mouth up with my own.

  Where the hell did that just come from?

  My eyes fixed on her mouth. The contrast of her red lipstick against her pale skin. I hated myself for it. Hated myself for having these thoughts about a sixteen-year-old girl. One whose sole intention was to drive me insane. It’s like she was put here to fuck with me. And she was. Completely and utterly fucking with my head.

  “I’ll make you scared of me if you don’t watch that mouth of yours.”

  “Is that a threat?”

  “Yes, yes it is.”

  She snorted and crossed her arms over her chest, ignoring the fact I’d caged her in. Apparently, it didn’t matter to Aurora Knox. She looked at me with disdain written all over her features. As if she wasn’t afraid of me at all.

  “Go ahead. Says more about you wanting to want to scare a teenager, as you keep calling me, than it does me after all.”

  For fuck’s sake, this girl was actually going to be the death of me. Throwing all my words back in my face. I couldn’t deny her intelligence. Perhaps it’s why she intrigued me so much. I rarely met a woman who could challenge me. And fuck did this blasted girl do it in ways I wasn’t exactly comfortable with.

  Just put her in her place and be done with it. Then you never have to see her again.

  “You should know better than to wave a red flag at a bull.”

  “You? A bull? Don’t make me laugh.”

  I leant even closer. We were inches apart. Aurora sucked in a breath.

  “We both know why you’re really here.”

  “Oh yeah? And why’s that?”

  I smiled.

  “You want me.”

  Before she could open her mouth, I shoved my hand against it.

  “Oh no, you’ve talked long enough. It’s time you listened.”

  Her eyes hardened, but I didn’t care. I was done with this shit. There was only one way I’d get rid of the temptation that was this maddening girl in front of me. And it was to make sure she never fucking tried to darken my door ever again.

  “This tough girl act you’ve got going on here is all a front. You’re just a scared, lonely little girl who thinks you’re someone but really, you’re nothing and nobody.”

  Aurora’s golden-hued eyes widened.

  “And in case you were getting any further ideas, or building up to give me more smart remarks, then listen closely… I will never be interested in the likes of you. You are a child who has no business coming anywhere near me.”

  Lies. Such lies you’re spouting to her right now.

  “I suggest you stop trying to play at being an adult and go run back to your family with your tail between your legs because you won’t find what you’re looking for here.”

  Her breath fluttered across my hand as she let it out in a whoosh. I watched pain flash across her eyes and then the biggest kicker of all was tears welled in them.

  Aurora raised her hands and shoved me back, ripping my hand from her mouth. She sucked in air and gave me the most agonising stare I’d ever been on the receiving end of. The hurt lurking there cut me in ways I never thought possible with someone I barely knew.

  “You know nothing about me,” she whispered, “Nothing at all.”

  She turned and ran from the room, leaving me feeling like I’d gone too far. And this time, I didn’t go after her. Instead, I walked away and threw myself down in my desk chair.

  “What the hell is wrong with you?” I muttered, rubbing my temples.

  My head pounded like a bitch. Had I made an error of judgement by putting her in her place like that? Why did I even care? The girl meant nothing to me. Nothing at all. I should relish the fact she’d probably never come looking for me again.

  Why are you wanting to go after her and apologise, huh?

  I shouldn’t, since I’d meant what I said. She was a child. An angry teenager who was lashing out at the world. And yet, apparently, it didn’t matter to me. I stared down at myself, wondering why the fuck being close to her had given me a stirring I shouldn’t be having.

  “For fuck’s sake,” I muttered, digging through my drawer for more painkillers.

  This had turned into an absolutely nightmarish day. I wanted nothing more to do with it. And I wanted to stop thinking about Aurora Knox.

  I popped out two pills when I found them and downed them with a glass of water. Then I sat back and stared at the desk, trying to kid myself into believing it would be the end of my association with the girl. But nothing I did would shake the feeling I had. This was only the beginning, and I didn’t want to know what the fuck I was in for next.

  Chapter Seven

  I would not cry. I outright refused to cry over his words even though they’d cut me to the core, e
xposing all of my insecurities and self-doubts. Logan Benson wasn’t only an arsehole, he was downright cruel. All I’d wanted was the last word and then he had to chase after me. He had to say those things and make me feel small. Insignificant.

  “You’re nothing and nobody.”

  Right up until that moment, I’d been enjoying our verbal sparring. The way he’d looked so incensed by my presence. It gave me some sort of sick satisfaction to wind the man up. To watch him explode at me. To see the fire in those ice-blue eyes. Then he had to go make it personal. I hated the way he’d seen right through me. Seen everything I kept hidden and dragged it out into the open. And instead of giving it right back, I’d run off like a coward.

  Holding back tears, I burst out back onto the shop floor and ran headlong into Rory who steadied me with his free hand, the other containing shopping bags. I stared up at my dad, catching his disapproving expression.

  “I thought I told you not to run off,” he murmured. “This wasn’t part of the agreement.”

  “I’m sorry,” I choked out, feeling like the world’s worst daughter for misbehaving yet again.

  Here I’d been so focused on getting back at Logan and it had all been for nothing. He’d left me feeling as though I would break in half any second. I’d never felt this vulnerable and stripped bare by a few words. What the hell was happening to me? I’d never let anyone make me feel that way before. Never allowed anyone to get to me.

  Was he right?

  Did I want him?

  Of course, you don’t want him. He’s a dickhead and isn’t worth your time or your concern.

  Except, apparently, he had been, since I’d come all of this way to put him in his place. I’d failed miserably. For the first time in my life, I’d been beaten at my own game.

  As he stared at me, Rory’s disapproval morphed into concern.

  “What’s wrong, Rora?”

  “Nothing,” I whispered, “I want to go home.”

  “What happened?”

  I didn’t want to tell him. No one could know about how I’d gone out of my way to taunt a man I didn’t know and how he’d upset and embarrassed me.

  “Please, Dad, just take me home.”

  The fact I’d called him that spoke volumes. Usually, I used his name apart from when I was trying to get my own way. We might only call our biological fathers, Dad, but it didn’t change the fact Rory was just as much my father as Quinn.

  He reached up and stroked my hair back, making my urge to cry worse.

  “Did someone upset you?”

  I nodded, unable to lie to him.

  “You don’t want to talk about it.”

  I shook my head, leaning into his comforting touch. Rory wrapped an arm around me and held me against his chest. I clutched his coat, holding back those damn tears pricking at the corner of my eyes.

  “You didn’t really want to go shopping for your school stuff, did you?”

  “No,” I mumbled.

  “Is this about a boy?”

  “No! He’s not a boy.”

  I almost kicked myself for admitting it out loud to Rory. Out of all my dads, he was the most observant. You couldn’t get anything by him. I don’t know why I bothered trying.

  He pulled back and stared down at me.

  “Let me guess, this has something to do with what happened yesterday.”

  “You can’t tell Dad!”

  His eyebrow raised, and I knew I wouldn’t get away with anything now. The thought of my dad finding out about Logan made me ill. He raised me to never let anyone put me down or give me shit. I couldn’t imagine his disappointment knowing I’d deliberately found out Logan’s information and came here to taunt him. I knew it had not been what he meant by not allowing people to walk all over me.

  “I won’t tell him, provided you promise me you won’t continue in whatever ridiculous plan you hatched up. And I mean it, Rora, none of these false promises you try to give the others.”

  “This time I really mean it when I say I never want to see him again.”

  I wasn’t lying. Right then, I hoped to never lay eyes on Logan Benson. Normally, this would have only made me more eager to destroy the man, only I felt too exposed by his words. He’d picked me apart and I couldn’t face him. Not now.

  “I’m sure you think that right now.”

  He dropped his arm from around me and took my hand, directing me towards the front of the shop. I didn’t bother responding. The deflated feeling wouldn’t leave me. I’d messed up. And whilst I wanted to place the blame at Logan’s door, I couldn’t. It was mine. Still, he didn’t have to say such heartless things to me. He didn’t need to be so cruel.

  You should’ve known he’d be like this.

  I had been stupid enough to believe I could best him. Idiotic and arrogant. I wouldn’t try to taunt someone again with little provocation if this was the outcome. Lesson learnt.

  “Why don’t we grab some popcorn and ice cream on the way home, hmm?”

  I looked up at Rory as he opened the door and directed me outside onto the street.

  “For a film night?”

  “Yes, I’ll even make sure your brothers don’t complain about what you pick.”

  I smiled.

  “Yeah, okay.”

  He let go of my hand, wrapping an arm around me and kissing the top of my head.

  “I know you’re very close with Quinn and you usually go to him when the bad shit happens, but you’re my daughter too, Rora. I don’t like seeing you upset. I love you.”

  My heart got all tight. Whilst Rory was affectionate with us kids, he rarely told you exactly how he felt. When he did, it meant something.

  “Love you too.”

  He gave me a bright smile and led me away to the underground to catch the tube home. At least we had got most of the things I needed for school before I’d insisted on coming to Bensons. I looked back at the shop over my shoulder, internally cursing the man inside whose name stuck out like a sore thumb on the frontage.

  I really mean it. I hope I never see you again, Logan Reid Benson.

  Even as I thought it, I couldn’t shake the feeling the man would fast become the bane of my life. And I had no idea how to feel about it.

  Chapter Eight

  “You look rather pensive,” came a sing-song Scottish lilted voice.

  I looked down, finding my mother standing by my side with a soft smile on her face. I’d taken after my father looks-wise, but I had a lot of my mother’s personality traits. She’d always been strong-willed and never backed down from anything. Dad once told me she’d been adamant about going back to work after she had me, since she’d had to give it up during her pregnancy. Mum loved animals, had a degree in Biological Sciences (Zoology) and worked part-time as a keeper at London Zoo.

  “Just because Ant has married Maia, doesn’t mean he’s going to abandon your friendship.”

  My eyes went back to my best friend and my cousin who were on the dancefloor together. Maia looked stunning in her figure-hugging dress, which no doubt Aunt Jen had helped her pick out.

  “I’m happy for them.” And I was. Ant and Maia deserved their happiness. “Besides, he’s family now. I’m stuck with the fool.”

  She squeezed my arm.

  “You willing to spare a dance for your mum or will I ruin your image?”

  I stifled a smile.

  “Why? Is Dad refusing or something?”

  Putting my arm out, Mum placed her hand in the crook of my elbow and we walked towards the dancefloor together.

  “No, he’s talking to your uncles. He promised me one later.”

  I glanced towards the bar finding Dad with my uncles, James and Brent. Next to them was my Aunt Ellie and her kids, Raoul and Roux, who looked like they’d rather be anywhere else than at their cousin’s wedding. They were only thirteen and fourteen. I could hardly blame them. It’s not like there were too many people their age at the wedding unle
ss you counted our sixteen-year-old cousin, Leo, which was short for Leonardo. He was dancing with his mother, my Aunt Fi, when Mum and I arrived on the floor. Leo was the spitting image of his father, Uncle Jensen, with messy brown hair and green eyes.

  “You sure you’re okay?” Mum asked after we’d been swaying to the music for a minute.

  “I’m fine. It’s just been a long week.”

  After my run-in with that blasted girl last weekend, I was happy to report I hadn’t seen her again. Maybe she’d decided I wasn’t worth the time and effort. It bothered me I was still even thinking about her. As if she mattered to me.

  She did not.

  Then there was Ant pestering me every day in the lead up to the wedding. I’d assured him everything was under control but he didn’t half like to fret about shit. It’s not as if I’d lost their rings which he’d given me for safekeeping or anything. Thank fuck this wedding was done with and they were off on their honeymoon in a couple of days. I’d finally have some peace and quiet.

  “The lead up to a wedding is always stressful. I remember when your dad and I got married. It was non-stop.”

  “If this is what getting married involves, then count me out.”

  Mum smiled and rubbed my shoulder with her hand.

  “You might change your mind one day.”

  “You that eager for grandkids?”

  I almost shuddered as the words left my mouth. As far as I was concerned, twenty was far too young to be thinking of such things. Besides, women were too much trouble as evidenced by that girl.

  Stop thinking about her.

  “No, I want you to be happy, Logan. That’s all.”

  “I am happy.”

  I kept telling myself that, anyway. Not like I had any worries or concerns. Apart from the fact I was fucking bored. Nothing seemed to interest me any longer. I had more money than I could ever need. A career most people would die for. A family who loved me. Women throwing themselves at me. I could want for nothing. But none of it satisfied me.

  Until you met a certain teenager who drives you crazy.

  The less said and thought about that, the better.

  “If you say so.”

 

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