by Leslie North
Loneliness tugged at her chest before she pushed it aside and ducked, narrowly avoiding the hard uppercut Loki threw her way. At least she’d give him that. He never pulled his punches with her just because she was female. He treated her as an equal, both personally and professionally and that was a rare thing these days. Especially for a guy with his background.
And speaking of his background…
“Tell me about your parents,” she said. She’d seen his dossier, researched him just as he’d researched her, but she wanted to know what wasn’t on the page. There’d been precious little about him as a baby, which was odd. “Who were they?”
He didn’t say anything, just turned and started pummeling a nearby bag hung from the ceiling by a chain. He mumbled something she didn’t quite catch between jabs.
“I’m sorry?” she said, walking around behind the bag to steady it for him. “I didn’t catch that.”
Loki performed an impressive roundhouse kick to the bag that knocked M back a few steps, then turned away, sweat dripping off his hair and running down his bare chest and spine. Naughty girl that she was, M couldn’t help watching that slow trickle, wishing she could trace it with her tongue, taste the salty tang of his skin, hear his moans of pleasure once more.
“I don’t know,” he said at last, so quiet she would’ve missed it if she hadn’t been paying such close attention to him. He cracked open a bottle of water and gulped down half the contents in one shot. She couldn’t tear her eyes away from the way his muscles worked in his sleek, tanned neck as he swallowed. Damn, the man was fine.
Then his words sank in and she frowned. “What do you mean you don’t know?”
“I mean I never met them. My real parents.” He finished off the water then tossed the bottle into the trash bin across the room, scoring a perfect hit. “My dad walked out on my mom before I was born. After she had me, my mom couldn’t cope, so she left me at a fire station one night with a note and never looked back. I have no idea who either of them are.”
He looked so sad and broken standing there, messing with his gloves instead of looking at her, that M wanted to hold him close and comfort him any way she could. But judging from the hard set to his jaw and features, her sympathy wouldn’t be welcome right now. So she stayed put. “I’m sorry,” she said, the words inadequate, but nothing else came to mind to say. “I didn’t realize.”
Loki gave an unpleasant snort. “Well, it’s not exactly the sort of thing you talk about much. Hey, my parents didn’t want me so they gave me away.” He shook his head and rolled his shoulder. “No big deal. I’m over it now. Been over it for a long time.”
She nodded, though it was obvious his hurt over it hadn’t gone away at all. “What happened after that?”
“I went into foster care.” He glanced up at her then, gaze narrowed. “And please, spare me your pity. It was fine. I was never mistreated and I got to live all over the country with a bunch of different families. It taught me a lot and I learned to be self-sufficient.”
“That explains your cavalier attitude.” She grabbed her towel and wiped off her face. “You don’t seem to let anything bother you.”
“Oh, things still bother me.” He chuckled and leaned back against the wall. “I just don’t sweat the small stuff. I learned that from my big brother when I was seven.”
“You’ve got a brother?”
“Not a biological one. This guy was part of that program Big Brothers and Big Sisters. The lady I was fostering with at the time was divorced and she thought it would be good for me to have a positive adult male role model in my life. So, she set me up with the program.” He shrugged and grinned as M moved in beside him against the wall. “Gus was awesome. Big guy, mid-thirties. He was a cop in Detroit where I lived at the time. At first I was a bit defensive, with my background and all, but he won me over. Used to play baseball with me and buy me the best deep-dish pizza in the city afterward. It was great.”
“Sounds like it.” M couldn’t help smiling along with him. “How long did he mentor you?”
“About five years, until my foster mom got remarried and I was assigned to a new family in Arizona.” His mention of Phoenix back at the bar popped into M’s head, but she didn’t want to ask him about that just now. Learning more about this enigmatic man was too precious to jeopardize right now. “Anyway, one day Gus had to stop at his apartment for something on our way to get pizza. He got a phone call so I started looking around and found a box of old pictures in his closet. He wasn’t the same Gus I knew as a cop. He was younger, and richer too, if the fancy car in the photos was anything to go by.” Loki shook his head. “Gus caught me looking at them and when I asked about it, he told me he’d been forced to go into Witness Protection because of some bad things he’d done in his past.” Loki shrugged and stared into the distance. “I suppose that’s where my fascination with undercover work and changing personas started. I thought that if a guy like Gus could remake himself and begin a brand-new life, why couldn’t I?”
“Good point.” M twisted the towel between her hands, wanting to keep this newfound intimacy between them going for as long as possible. It was so nice to have someone she could talk to, share things with. She had Marcus of course, and her adopted parents, who loved her like their own, but this was different. This was something she and Loki had in common, awful as it was. Another shared bond. Another connection. She cleared her throat and blurted out the words before she lost her courage. “We, uh, both have that then. Being unwanted.”
At his inquisitive look, she continued. “You know I was adopted by the Walkers when I was just a baby. But I’ve always wondered what my birth parents were like. Why they gave me up.”
“Hmm.” Loki nodded, staring down at the mat beneath their feet. Once more, the place was deserted except for them. Another advantage of being a night owl and working out in the wee hours. Privacy. “Have to say I’m a bit jealous of you, growing up in such a stable environment, M.”
“But you said you weren’t ever mistreated.”
“I wasn’t. Doesn’t mean I didn’t want more.” He closed his eyes and leaned his head back against the wall. She fisted her hands at her sides to keep from embracing him and snuggling close into his warm solid chest. He rolled his head to her and peeked one eye open. “All right. I’ve shared my secrets with you. Now it’s your turn.”
Her nails dug into her palms as nervousness ate a hole inside her. With most people, she wore her indifference like a shroud, never letting them see past her staunch defenses to the real woman beneath. But Loki seemed to scale all her barriers without even trying. Which meant she needed to be even more careful around him. He could destroy her with no effort at all, she felt that vulnerable to him. “What do you want to know?”
“What’s the M stand for?” he asked.
She laughed. “Are you telling me that in all your research you never found that out?”
Loki gave a one-shoulder shrug. “I know already. I want to see if you tell me the truth. Humor me.”
“Fine, since you already know. But you have to promise you won’t make fun.”
“Promise.” He gave her the scouts-honor sign. “Now tell.”
“Mirabelle.”
“Mirabelle.” He said with it with a roll of his tongue. He raised a brow and opened both eyes, staring at her with that intense green gaze of his, heat and humor flickering in its depths. “All right. Sure. I can see it. Yeah. And thanks for being honest.”
“Oh, shut up.” She threw her towel at him, smacking him directly in the face with it, though there was no real anger behind it. Soon, she was chuckling right along with him. “It was a Walker family name. Belonged to a great-grandmother or something. It’s a perfectly fine name.”
“If you’re two-hundred.” Loki shook with laughter, his eyes watering. “I figured your real name was something kick-ass, like Motherfuc—”
“Hey!” She whapped him hard on the arm and he grabbed her wrist, pulling her into his arms in f
ront of him. M stared up into his grinning face and smiled right back. “I like M. It’s mysterious.”
“And it has that whole James Bond-y thing going on too.” He widened his stance so she fit neatly between his thighs, making her feel small and fragile yet cared for and strong at the same time. “And it suits you perfectly. I like it too.”
“You do?” she teased, pressing closer, enjoying this playfulness.
“Oh, yeah.” He bent his head, his gaze flickering to her lips before returning to her eyes. “I do.”
His kiss started soft and gentle then gradually progressed to hard and hot and needy. By the time they separated, both of them were breathless. M took his hand and led him out of the gym, flipping the lights off on their way with her free hand.
“Let’s get upstairs,” she said, dropping another quick kiss on his cheek. “I’m seeing another shower in our future.”
11
Loki rolled his tense shoulders and focused on the road ahead.
“Remind me again why we’re back here,” M said impatiently from the passenger seat of the SUV. “Because I hate sitting around doing nothing.”
He glanced over at her, brow raised. “Really? I had no idea.”
She gave him a death glare for his sarcasm and he chuckled. This was nice, this new easy banter between them. He liked it, probably way more than was wise. Liked her too, a lot. Way more than he’d liked another woman in a long time. M just seemed to get him. She didn’t take any of his shit either, which was refreshing. People tended to either go along with his ever-changing personas or ignore them. M did neither. She called him out on it, and he appreciated that. With her around he certainly wouldn’t ever have to worry about losing himself inside one of his created, imaginary lives. That was worth a great deal.
But so was his career. He’d worked hard to get where he was and he wasn’t prepared to lose it all because he got too wrapped up in some whirlwind affair. Frankly, that’s all there was between them at this point. Sex. Incredible, hot, naughty, burn the house down sex, but still just that. No more and no less. Hardly enough to build a future on, right?
Exhaling slow, he pulled out his phone to check the latest updates from Cam back at headquarters. “We’re here because word on the street has it that Todd Martin will try to make another drop at the convenience store tonight, remember?”
M flipped him off at his patronizing tone, then crossed her arms. “I know that. I just don’t like sitting around. Why can’t I go in undercover like I did before? There’s a thrift shop down the street. I can pop in and buy an outfit and be unrecognizable in five minutes.”
“No.” Loki frowned down at his phone screen. If things went south again and another shootout erupted, he didn’t want M caught in the crossfire. “Cam thinks the location might be compromised and I don’t want you going in there alone.”
She snorted. “I didn’t think you cared.”
Loki opened his mouth to answer then snapped it shut. He did care, too much. That was the problem. “This mission’s too important. We wait here and go in once Martin arrives.”
“Who died and made you the boss?”
“What crawled up your ass and died?” he countered, regretting the rash statement the minute the words left his mouth. Her expression shifted from annoyed to downright mulish and he knew he was in for a long, bumpy stakeout.
“You know what? Fuck you, that’s what.” She poked her index finger at him across the console, her blue eyes glittering like diamonds in the darkness. “You think just because we’ve fucked a couple of times that it’s okay for you to tell me what to do? Wrong. No one bosses me around except the people paying me, and even then I only do what I want to do. Got it? You don’t own me, you don’t tell me what to do. Period. The end. We’re a partnership, not master and slave.”
He raised his hands in surrender. “Fine. Sorry. I didn’t intend to say that, but I was angry.”
“Yeah, well, you did.” She started to say more, but her phone buzzed and M pulled it out, scowling. “It’s Marcus.”
Loki did his best not to eavesdrop on their conversation, but it was hard given they were sitting only about a foot apart. He heard M murmur something about family and not going and then she hung up, her expression darker than before.
She sighed and shoved her phone back into her pocket then stared out the window beside her, silent.
Curiosity getting the better of him, Loki found himself asking, “Everything okay?”
“Yes.” She shook her head, rolled her eyes. “No. I don’t know. Why do you care?”
He caught her gaze then and held, shrugging slightly. “I guess because I wonder how nice it must be to have family to have problems with.”
“Oh.” M blinked at him several times, biting her lips. “Oh,” she repeated, her frown deepening. “Shit. I’m sorry. That was insensitive of me. I’m sorry I’ve been such a pain in the ass tonight. I’m just on edge and I want all this bullshit with Martin to be over already, you know?”
“Yeah, I know.” Loki reached over and tucked a stray curl behind her ear. “And it’s okay. Unfortunately, I don’t think Todd Martin’s going to show up here anyway. He’s an hour late as it is and that’s not like him. We should probably go back to the apartment and regroup, maybe try again tomorrow night.”
M nodded then sat back while Loki started the engine and pulled out of their parking spot along the curb of a quiet residential street. “It’s not all rainbows and flowers,” she said.
“What’s not?” Loki asked, looking over at her.
“My adoption.” She exhaled slowly and focused out her window. “I tried to contact my biological mom a few years ago, just to talk to her, meet her, find out why she gave me up. She died before I could talk to her.”
“I’m sorry, darling,” Loki said, reaching over to take her hand. Her fingers felt icy to the touch and Loki entwined them with his own to warm them. “That’s tough.”
“Turns out she started a whole new life after she gave me away. Married, had three more children. She stayed at home with them, teaching them, loving them.” M squeezed her eyes shut. “I wonder sometimes what I missed out on with her. Which makes me feel awful because my adopted parents were great. I’ve got nothing to complain about. Nothing. Yet, still I can’t help wondering.”
“That’s normal, darling.” Loki raised her hand to his lips and kissed her chilled skin. “We all wonder what might have been. The important thing is to not get lost there. Live the life you have now, right?”
She sighed, gave him a tremulous smile. “Right.”
They were halfway back to the apartment when Loki’s phone rang again. He couldn’t answer it while driving—the SUV didn’t have Bluetooth—so he pulled it out and handed it to M. “Put it on speaker phone.”
“Loki?” Cam’s voice rang out once M answered. “We got a trace on Todd Martin.”
M looked over at him, eyes wide. “Where is he?”
“Who’s this?” Cam asked, his voice suspicious over the phone line.
“It’s M. She’s my partner on this one. Go ahead and tell me. It’s fine. We’ve got you on speaker.” Loki winked over at her. “We’re handling this one together.”
“Uh, okay,” Cam said, his tone still wary. “Looks like Martin’s in the lobby of some building downtown. Surveillance footage just picked him up.”
“Where?” Loki and M asked in unison.
“Corner of Brockman and State Street.”
“Holy shit!” M gaped. “That’s my building. What’s he doing there?”
“Nothing yet, that I can see.” Cam snorted. “He’s just standing there talking to the guy at the security desk.”
“I bet he’s there to break into your place,” Loki said. “Why else would he go to that apartment building?”
“But how did he find me?”
They looked at each other, realization dawning at the same time, and said together, “Simcova.”
“That bitch!” M grumbled. “F
ine, let’s go get him.”
“Wait!” Loki pulled off the road into a deserted gas station parking lot and jammed the transmission into park. “We need a plan here. Going in half-cocked will only make it easier for Martin to escape or worse.” He rubbed his eyes and concentrated. “Cam, can you get ahold of Hunter and the two of you meet us there for back-up?”
“Um, sure.” Cam sounded both surprised and uncertain. He was their tech guru, rarely left the office unless a job required his unique skill set. The one time he had run his own mission, things had turned out less than ideally—at least from Norse Security’s end of things. For Cam, it had been fantastic. That’s how he’d met his wife. Hunter, too, had met his fiancée on a job, but Hunter was pure muscle and brute force. He was used to combat and fighting his way out of difficult situations. Coupled with Cam’s brains and Loki’s suave people skills, they made the perfect trio. Tonight, though, they needed to catch a crook. It was the only way to save their beloved business and hopefully get M her coveted promotion. “Let me just call him and bring him in. Give me an hour.”
“You’ve got thirty minutes. I don’t want Martin getting away again.” Loki ended the call then pulled back out into the street on a rush of adrenaline, tires squealing. “You ready to do this?”
M grinned. “Baby, I was born ready to do this.”
12
They ended up stopping at that thrift store after all. M went inside and bought a short denim skirt and a grunge rock T-shirt. She changed in the dressing room and paid the cashier on the way out, looking for all the world like an emo teen, or part of some cheesy pop star’s fan base. Exactly what she was going for.
Her neighborhood wasn’t exactly ritzy, but it was quiet. For a questionable teen to walk into her apartment building unaccompanied like this? Yeah, distraction achieved. She only prayed that Todd Martin would still be there when they arrived.
Loki parked the SUV about a block away and they snuck close to the building then hid in the shadows until his guys arrived. Cam was pretty much what she’d expected—young, cute, with a gorgeous-geek kind of vibe going on. Hunter reminded her of the lunks in her gym who spent hours a day honing their huge physiques to perfection, except based on what Loki had told her, Hunter came by his massive size naturally. There was a kindness and consideration in his eyes, however, that told her he was far deeper and more complex than people gave him credit for. She liked them both immediately, which was unusual for her. It normally took her some time to warm up to new people, if she ever did. But with these guys it felt like home, like she’d always belonged.