I recognized the stiffness in his chin from my own stubbornness, so I nodded and followed him into his room, which I was more than a little curious about.
He flipped on a light that revealed wood panel walls, a twin-sized bed, a desk with a hutch, and not much more. The faded navy comforter had seen better days. The mini blinds were broken and cracked in places. When I turned to face him, I made sure I smiled.
“I wonder how many girls can say they’ve been in Chance’s room,” I teased.
“Not many.” There was no hint of a laugh behind his tired eyes.
I walked over and smoothed his brows. “You’ll get through this.”
Lifting on my toes, I wasn’t sure what I’d do when I got high enough to brush my lips over his. At the last second, I changed trajectory and planted a kiss on his cheek. Flat on my feet, I rocked, not knowing what came next.
“Night, Brie.”
Wearily, he disappeared, and I closed the door. I didn’t turn off the light yet. Spying the pictures on the hutch, I investigated. Sure enough, a blonde who could have modeled for Sports Illustrated filled most of the pictures. She’d been a perfectly built cheerleader with a smile to lure any guy to his knees. There were so many pictures, candid moments and moments he’d caught her off guard. An ancient Polaroid camera that had probably been used to take many of the pictures sat high on the shelf wedged between trophies.
Chance had apparently mastered many sports outside of football, including basketball and baseball. There were pictures of him in his uniform. The boy had been a heartbreaker all his life.
But there was one picture that tore at me even more. Chance’s mom holding him as a baby with the only genuine smile I’d seen in any of the pictures. It was telling that had been the one he’d coveted.
When I finally turned off the light, I lay on his bed, wondering how much I really knew about him. I knew he loved hard. It was easy to see Lindsey had consumed his thoughts. He claimed I was the one for him, but I was no Lindsey. She was perfect in a Miss Universe kind of way. My hips and ass were bigger; my boobs were smaller. She had beauty beyond compare. As I drifted off to sleep, I classified myself in the role of the ugly stepsister with no fairy godmother.
It felt like I’d only just closed my eyes when I was awakened by a hand on my shoulder. My eyes popped open to find Chance looking down at me.
“Hey, I didn’t want to wake you, but I know you have a class this morning. If you want to make it, you should leave soon.”
“What? Wait? Are you not going?”
Sadly, he shook his head. “I need to stay here and get Dad straightened out. I’ve made you breakfast.”
He held out a hand to help me up. I covered my mouth, fearing morning breath. His lips curled the tiniest, and it felt like a victory.
“I guarantee you smell like a rose garden compared to my dad,” he said, grinning.
Playfully, I waved him off. “Still, can I use your bathroom?”
He showed me to it. After I finished with the facilities, I finger-brushed my teeth with toothpaste sitting on the tiny basin.
Chance was in the kitchen, wrapping up food with saran wrap when I came in.
“Your plate is on the table.”
Starving more than I believed myself to be, I devoured the eggs and bacon.
“Hungry?” he asked.
I nodded around a mouthful of food. He chuckled, which sounded nice after a horrible night.
“How’s your dad?” I asked after swallowing.
“Sleeping.”
“I can skip class.”
“No,” he said adamantly. “I’ll catch a bus back. It’s fine. Plus, I’m not sure how long I’ll be here. I’m going to try to get him in a rehab place again.”
“He’s been in one before?”
With a head shake, he said, “No. There’s always a waiting list for those who can’t pay. And Dad isn’t the worst case. He’s low priority in their eyes.”
“I can see what maybe my parents can do to find something. As doctors, they have friends they went to school with all around the country.”
“No.” The word came sharp and clipped from his lips. “I can handle it.”
“Are you—”
“Brie, look, I appreciate it. But the last thing I want is for your parents to know what losers my dad and I are.”
I opened my mouth.
“You should probably go. You’re barely going to make it back to campus on time if you leave now.”
Swiftly, he dismissed me. There were so many things I wanted to say, but didn’t. I left, wondering what my parents would think about the boy I was trying not to fall in love with but failing.
“There is just one thing.”
On the doorstep, I faced him. “What’s that?”
“Be careful with that guy.”
My heart sank. Had I missed my opportunity with him? Had he given up on me? “Why?”
“I don’t trust him.”
I’d heard this all before. “Chance—”
“Hear me out. I see how he looks at you. And he doesn’t look at you the way you deserve.”
Annoyed, I lashed out. “What’s that, Chance? I don’t deserve a guy like him?”
“No.” Earnestly, he pleaded with his eyes for me to hear him. “He doesn’t look at you the way I do. And I know how I feel about you.”
With closed eyes, I used my palm to close the front door. Brie was gone, and I could tell she didn’t believe me. Of course my dad hadn’t helped matters, filling her head with ideas that I still held a torch for Lindsey.
Lightly, I knocked my head against the frame. My life. I had the game in a few days, and I needed to try to figure things out for my dad before I could go back.
“Chance, are you here?” Dad called gruffly from his room.
Deeply, I sucked in a lungful of air before heading to his room.
“I need a drink. I’ve got the shakes.”
It had only been a few months, but I could swear Dad had aged a millennium. And it sucked seeing him like that. It was worse when he held his arm up as if reaching for me. His hand trembled with the force of an earthquake.
I almost turned away just before his hand hit the bed like lead and his body began to convulse. Although, I’d never seen it in person, I recognized he was in the throes of a seizure. With no medical training, I did what I’d seen people in movies do and hoped I wasn’t causing more harm. I pinned his shoulders as he foamed at the mouth, before turning him on his side so he didn’t choke.
Scared shitless, I hesitated at putting my hands in his mouth to stop him from swallowing his tongue. I didn’t see how it was possible, but the little I’d heard about what was happening flashed in my head as I almost pissed myself seeing my dad’s jaws locked together as if he were in the worst pain.
Time continued for two eternities before his body quieted. Then the world slowed, or so it felt. I could hear myself in the distance calling his name and shaking him when he didn’t respond. Then I dove for the phone at the side of his bed, the one tethered to the wall, and pressed 911.
I was still on the phone with the operator when Dad blinked groggily a few times. A screaming siren grew closer, and seconds later knocks came at my door. People invaded my cramped house, following me into his room. Gaining some control, he tried to tell them he was okay, but I explained what I’d witnessed.
After some discussion with hospital staff via radio equipment, we were closed up in the back of the ambulance and on our way to the hospital. Dad had another seizure along the way. I sat helpless as the emergency medical personnel jumped into action. It couldn’t be good as I listened to them talk to hospital staff about the situation.
Dazed, I watched as Dad was rushed into the emergency room. I was stopped and had to give a medical history I didn’t know. I felt useless except for the insurance card from Dad’s job. And I felt like a traitor as I gave details of his alcohol abuse. Then it was a waiting game as I sat in his hospital room.
&n
bsp; “Mr. Abbott, how’s your dad doing?”
A white lab coat covered dark blue scrubs.
“He’s been sleeping.”
“That’s not unusual.”
“Do you know what caused this?”
With folded hands, he let the clipboard hang in front of him in a two-hand grip. “There aren’t always answers. Alcoholism can play a role. We are running tests, but we may never know.”
“Does he have alcohol poisoning? Can you treat him for this?”
“These days we don’t treat that. We give lots of fluids and let the body rid itself of the poisoning, though we do monitor the patient.”
“So, there’s nothing?”
“The main disease associated with seizures is epilepsy, which doesn’t have a cure.”
At some point later the nurses urged me to get something to eat. Everything felt foreign standing in the hospital cafeteria. It certainly wasn’t the university café, which had a decent selection of foods. All I could see was congealed eggs, blackened bacon, and toast that looked like they had sat for days.
“Chance.”
The voice was something out of the past.
“Lindsey.”
There was something different about her, yet all was the same.
“I heard about your dad.” She saw the confusion on my face. “I work here, and so does Carrie. You remember her? She saw you come in this morning. I didn’t want to stop by right away. Plus, I was working.”
She blushed, and I glanced again at the food selections. “I heard you came by ambulance. I could run you home so you can get something proper to eat. I’m on break.”
I found myself nodding. Following her to her car, I thought I recognized the truck she drove.
“How have you been?” she asked by way of small talk.
“Good.”
I’d accepted her ride, but I wasn’t really interested in finding out about her life. That may have been shitty, but I wasn’t.
“You look good, and I’ve been watching your games.”
“How does Thad feel about that?” I asked.
Honestly, I had no idea if they were still together, but the effect of me using his name was immediate. She shut up, and I welcomed the silence. When we got to my house, though, I didn’t have it in me to tell her to leave. She’d brought me home on her break. The least I could do was offer to feed her.
“You hungry?”
She nodded, and I took out the breakfast plate I’d wrapped for my dad and popped it in the microwave. Then I got the rest of the eggs to make me a quick sandwich. I didn’t want to be gone long. I needed to talk to social services.
After eating, I said, “I’m going to take a quick shower before heading back. Thanks for the ride, but I’ll find Dad’s keys and drive myself back.”
I was halfway to the bathroom when she called out, “I’m sorry.”
Stopping, I glanced back. “Nothing to be sorry for.”
Then I closed myself behind the bathroom door. I felt relieved that Lindsey would leave because the only girl I could think of was Brie.
I didn’t hear it at first. With shampoo-lathered hands, I was unable to check out the noise until I was free of suds. When I opened my eyes, I wasn’t alone.
Cupping my junk, I stared in disbelief. “Lindsey, you need to leave.”
“It should have been you. I’ll always regret that.”
And she moved forward, crowding me in the shower.
Sitting in the guys’ living room with Lenora and Shelly, I felt at home even though it wasn’t my place.
“Have you heard from Chance?” I asked.
It had been a few days and I hadn’t. Not that I expected to.
Lenora glanced down a second before answering, “All I know is he’s still with his dad. And don’t give me that look. Contrary to belief, Kelley doesn’t tell me everything.”
“That’s good to know, but what do you tell him?”
She gave me an are you kidding me expression. “I keep your secrets. I don’t tell him everything either.”
Shelly and I nodded.
“I’m worried.” My words were soft.
Shelly, who sat next to me, heard me, though. “You’re in love with him. Admit it.”
It took only a second of reflection. “Yes.”
“And he’s in love with you, too. You know he’s posting pictures of the two of you on those romantic dates ya’ll had on Instagram, tagging it, me and #mygirl.”
“Romantic,” I sputtered. But they had been very romantic. And I’d had my nose so far up in books lately, I hadn’t seen his posts.
Sawyer walked into the house, silencing any further inquiry. On his heels was a tiny girl who was all smiles as he led her through to the stairs.
“Hi,” Shelly said.
He glanced over his shoulder. “Hey,” but continued up.
“Where is Ashton?”
Sawyer grunted and then added, “I’m not his keeper.”
Shelly, not willing to let it go, said, “Maybe you should tell him that.”
Lenora and I openly gaped at her. There were some things that just weren’t spoken of, and Sawyer and Ashton’s weird relationship was one of them. Though as of late, they were spending more and more time apart. And Sawyer didn’t like it whether he admitted or not.
Lenora asked, “What do you know? Things didn’t work out with Ashton?”
“What thing?” Shelly asked bitterly. “There has to be a thing first. And I don’t want to talk about it. Let’s get back to Brie. Are you still going out with that guy even after you admitted you’re in love with Chance? Not that I blame you about Chance.”
“I have to know,” I said absently.
“Know what?” they asked in unison.
I glanced over at the stairway, checking to make sure Sawyer hadn’t come back.
“This is the first guy I’ve been truly attracted to since Chance. And he hasn’t kissed me yet. I need to know what it would be like. Maybe this infatuation I have with Chance is only real because there hasn’t been anyone else since him that I’ve liked as much.”
“Are you sure that’s it?” Lenora asked.
“Yes, aren’t you the one who talks about butterflies? What if he gives me butterflies, too? I need to know. Otherwise, I might always regret.”
Shelly butted in. “And you’re not going to screw the guy?”
That wasn’t in the plan. “I don’t intend to. But I won’t rule it out. If he makes me feel and the moment feels right, why not?”
“Don’t do it out of spite,” Shelly said.
“It’s not spite. You guys are forgetting my virginity isn’t my virtue. If anything, it’s the bane of my existence. It’s the reason why Chance broke it off with me.”
Shelly held up a hand. “I don’t think I’ve heard the whole story even though I was there for the aftermath.”
“The Cliff Notes version is things were going great. He took me out a few times. We’d met up at a couple of parties. I thought…I thought he should know. So during one of our many conversations, I told him I was a virgin. And a couple of days later, he told me he wasn’t looking for a long-term relationship. End of story.”
“What a douche!” Shelly announced as if it happened yesterday.
“You can’t end it there. You didn’t tell her what he recently said about the girl who made him wait, only to cheat on him with someone else. And not just any girl but someone he’d been with for four years. And that happened a few months before he started college.”
“Damn, that changes things,” Shelly said, instantly shifting her opinion. “You just never know what people are going through.”
“Yes, and at least he didn’t string you along. He was honest and gave you that out.”
Needing to defend myself, I said, “That doesn’t mean it hurt any less.”
“But I believe him. I see how he looks at you. He looks at you the way Kelley looks at me. He’s in love with you. And he fucked up. But you can’t punis
h him forever. Otherwise, give the guy a break and cut him loose.” When Lenora finished, she held my gaze.
Unable not to squirm, I blurted, “I’m not the one stringing him along.”
“Aren’t you? Tell him you’re not playing that game of his anymore because there’s no hope.”
“I thought you were on my side,” I said to her.
Shelly jumped in. “Let me just say this. Chance made a huge mistake. But guys like him don’t come around that often. If you truly love him, maybe you should give him a shot.”
Talk about guys that weren’t made in abundance, Kelley walked in from the back hand in hand with Mason. The boy sprinted for his mother when he caught sight of her. He climbed the sofa to give her a hug, before turning around to settle on her lap. Rose cheeks were flushed from playing outside or he was acting shy as he stuck a thumb into his month. Kelley glanced around at us.
“Um, girl talk,” he said.
Lenora nodded. Kelley curled a finger and said, “Let’s go get a bath, Champ, and let the women have girl time.”
“Girl time.” Although, from Mason’s mouth it sounded more like “Grl Tim.”
Kelley nodded, and Lenora helped Mason to his feet.
As they walked away, dressed similarly in jeans and a shirt, it was too cute for words. Especially, as Kelley began to impart man words of wisdom to him. “Girl time is one thing you need to stay away from…” drifted off as they walked upstairs.
Hours later, in the mirror, I checked how I looked for the millionth time. The conversation I had with the girls replayed over and over in my head. And a couple of times, I had my phone out, ready to call off my date. But something always stopped me. Again, it came back to the simple truth of it. I needed to know.
When the text came, I walked down the steps and out the door. Davenport waited in his car, unable to be seen picking me up. But a warm smile greeted me when I entered.
“You look incredible.” His broad smile was infectious. “I can’t believe how long it’s taken me to do this. But I can’t wait any longer.”
Leaning over to me, I felt the moment about to happen. A million thoughts crisscrossed in the seconds before his lips would make contact with mine.
Catching Fireflies Page 10