by Dee J. Adams
“Case? Casey?” He turned his head and his smile faded at the empty spot next to him. “Casey?” he called louder. She must be in the bathroom. But even as he had the thought, the room seemed too still, too quiet.
Brendan sat up and wiped a hand over his face and through his hair as he looked around. “Casey?”
Not a peep. Not a sound. Her clothes should’ve been in a pile on the floor. Maybe she left a note…except he didn’t see one on the desk or the night table. Tossing the sheets back, Brendan saw no sign of her at all. He checked the bathroom, disappointment heavy in his chest. Nothing.
Okay, so maybe she went to get them some breakfast. She could’ve ordered room service. The voice in his head pissed him off. She bugged out, dude. The only person you’re going to get lucky with this morning is yourself. “Fuck that.”
Brendan pulled on his running shorts and shoes, fighting the urge to get angry. It was later than he usually ran, but he wasn’t going to forgo his normal routine just because of a night of crazy awesome sex.
There had to be a reason Casey bailed without a word. Maybe she left a note for him at the front. Yeah, that made sense. With his confidence back, Brendan stopped at the front desk and asked. The attendant typed a few things into her computer before looking up at him.
“I’m sorry, Mr. St. John. No messages.”
Okay. Now he was getting pissed. “Can you tell me which room Casey…” Shit! He didn’t even have her last name! Seriously? How the fuck did he not get her last name? He clenched his jaw.
“Casey…?” She waited, but shook her head, reading his dilemma. “Even if I had her full name, I can’t tell you, I’m sorry. You could use a house phone, the operator could connect you to her room, but she can’t do that without a last name.”
Brendan went for a long shot. “Have you been working all morning? Maybe you checked her out. She’s really tall, long straight, blondish-brown hair, beautiful blue-green eyes.” Jesus, he sounded like a sap.
Her eyebrows lifted. “Oh, yes! I saw her this morning. I didn’t check her out, but my colleague did a couple of hours ago. I remember wondering how long it takes to grow hair that long.”
Brendan’s heart stalled. “Seriously? She checked out?”
She gave him a sad smile. “Sorry about that.”
He didn’t budge, couldn’t believe it. They’d never even exchanged numbers. He had no idea how to reach her in Los Angeles.
“Is there anything else I can do for you?” The woman’s question brought him out of his thoughts.
“No, that’s it. Thanks.” Anger built in increments as he walked to the beach. Brendan started his run hard. All he could think about was the unparalleled night he’d had with a woman who came into his life from out of nowhere. Then she’d disappeared just as quickly. He had one more day in paradise. How the hell would he manage it without going out of his mind?
He pumped harder as sweat rolled down his face and chest. How could she do that? Hadn’t they clicked? She wouldn’t have let him do all the things he did to her the night before if she didn’t like him. Anger pushed him harder as he hit the halfway mark and turned back for the hotel.
Damn, he’d liked her. Liked her too much.
Why had she bolted?
Because of his ear? He doubted it. If it disgusted her that much she never would’ve let him lay a hand on her. Okay, so maybe she was scared, but he couldn’t guess from what. Last night had been totally consensual. Of that he was certain.
He slowed and finally stopped, his heart beating out of control. “You’re the rebound guy, dipshit.”
Brendan bent over and sucked wind, trying to get air into his fried lungs. He’d been used and used hard. Okay, so it wasn’t as if he didn’t get anything out of it, but her disappearance still hurt. Would it have killed her to leave a note? Something like… Hey Bren, sorry to fuck and run, but you were just the thing I needed to get over my ex, so thanks and have a great life. At least with that he’d have known where he stood.
He’d track her down that’s all. He’d track her down just to tell her what a shitty thing she did. Not a word. Not a one single good-bye. But shit, how did he find her without a fucking last name? How would he tell her what a low-life move she’d made? All she’d had to do was tell him she didn’t want to see him again. He’d have been hurt, but he’d rather that than wander around the hotel, looking for her and having to piece together the clues about why she hadn’t wanted a relationship.
Relationship? He was losing his mind.
Brendan started running again. He needed to clear his fuzzy head. How did he find her without a last name? He’d call in the big guns. His twin brother, Blake, loved to find people. In fact, he did it for living, working for a private investigator as he earned his hours for his own PI license. They had contacts up the wazoo. They knew how to get information the average guy couldn’t.
Brendan felt better with his new plan of action. He slowed his pace as he neared the hotel, his lungs heaving and his heart heavy. Whether he wanted to admit it or not, Casey had hurt him. Less than twenty-four hours with that lady and he already felt the loss like a knife in the chest.
He shouldn’t feel this devastated. He had a great night. Unparalleled his brain repeated. But he had big plans after next week and it’s not like he could ask her to wait for him when he disappeared for six weeks or so. If he was lucky enough to last that long where he was going.
So yeah, the run had cleared his head. He’d still look for her, but he’d wait to do the search after this next adventure he had planned. An adventure he never would’ve participated in if his brothers hadn’t convinced him to do it.
Brendan looked out to the spectacular ocean and all people in the water. The sun glistened like an orange beach ball low in the sky. The winds had died down and it was just another day in paradise.
Would he have ever met Casey if she hadn’t been in the water yesterday?
Brendan sucked in air and blew it out hard. He’d find her one way or another.
Chapter Seven
Casey zipped up her bag on the sofa and looked around her apartment. The coffee table looked barren without the usual mass of magazines and glasses littering the top. Vacuum wheels lined the runner where she’d sucked up any crumbs and dirt on her path from the kitchen to the den. Everything looked neat and in order. Hopefully, if everything played out the way it was supposed to, she would be back in six weeks to pack up her stuff and start a new life. Her sister promised to pick up her mail and cover any bills that needed to be paid during Casey’s absence.
God willing she’d be gone the whole damn time. Honestly, if she was home to pay bills then it meant she’d lost the chance of a lifetime.
Of course, she’d already accomplished that when she’d walked out on Brendan last week. God, it still hurt…had been the hardest thing she’d ever done. Harder than splitting up with Jeff, so what did that tell her? In the dim dawn light, Brendan had looked so freaking beautiful next to her, his lips almost turned up into a smile even as he slept. She’d wanted to touch him one last time, run her fingers over his muscled bicep or across his jaw. But she couldn’t chance waking him up. She didn’t want the good-bye. She only wanted the memories they’d created during the past day and night.
One night vs. four years, and the one night won hands down. Of course, dealing with the guilt wasn’t something she’d planned on.
The notes of “Old Time Rock and Roll” filled the silence. Casey found her phone in her purse and checked the screen. Parents. Her intestines knotted as she answered.
“Casey, I’m so glad we caught you,” her mother said. “It’s not too late to forget about this idea, honey.”
“Mom.” The warning in her voice should’ve been enough, but it wasn’t.
“Honey, you’re better than this reality show. You don’t need these people to tell you if you’re good enough. You write lovely songs. You can play them for your students and everyone can enjoy them that way.”
Casey wanted to scream, but she kept her voice level. “Don’t you want me to be successful, Mom? Isn’t that why you sent me to college and made sure I had a good education?” Sometimes she wished she’d gone to school somewhere other than San Diego. Maybe then she’d have put down roots farther away from her parents. “Because you want me to succeed?”
“Of course we want that,” her father said. He must have been on another extension. “Within reason,” he added. “These shows are the death of this country. And what if you lose your job because of this? Will your school even take you back if you don’t win?” He had a point because the school’s director had told her they could only hold off so long before finding her replacement. The longer she lasted on the show, the more chance she had of losing her regular job.
“Look, Dad, I’ll deal with my job, but don’t exaggerate the show. Yes, some of them are stupid, I agree, but some can really help people find their dream.”
“But it costs your pride, honey,” her mother said. Ever the optimist.
“Let me get this straight, Mom. Reaching for my dream embarrasses you?”
“You always do that, Casey. Stop putting words in your mother’s mouth.”
“Dad, I’m just trying to understand why you’re both so against this. I get that you’ve never been into reality television.” Or any television for that matter unless it was reruns of any of the old shows that played on obscure cable channels. Granted her parents were older than most of her friends’ parents, but for a couple of sixty-four year olds they acted more like they were in their eighties. “I understand you want me to be happy and you don’t think this is the way to go about it. All I’m asking is that you two try and understand where I’m coming from.” She heard her mother’s muffled sobs. Oh, for God’s sake.
“Now look what you’ve done,” her dad said.
“Casey,” her mother said through tears, “Your father provided a stable roof over your head and gave you everything you needed growing up. Is it so hard to respect his wishes?” Classic Mom. Defer to Dad and please him at all cost. “We may not have had a ton of money, but at least we can hold our heads high because we do the right thing.”
Meaning that participating in this show was the wrong thing? “Mom, at some point you and Dad are going to have to trust that I can make my way in life without making every decision according to your plan. I’m sorry that you…” She cut herself off before she said something stupid. “I’m sorry that you’re unhappy and I’ll talk to you when it’s over. Bye.” She disconnected before they said anything else, closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
Someone knocked on the door and Casey checked her watch. Zoe was right on time. That was a miracle in itself. Her sister never ran on schedule unless it involved work.
Casey swung the door wide and froze at the sight of Jeff filling the frame. First her parents and now him? Wearing one of his thousand-dollar gray suits, he looked like his father, the politician. He was only an inch taller than her, but he was wide, with massive shoulders and giant arms. The look on his face was enough to send her heart slamming against her ribs, but she refused to show any emotion.
Of the four years they’d been a couple, she’d been walking on eggshells around him for the past two, his temper growing worse as time went by. Well, she didn’t need to worry about that anymore because she didn’t care how angry he got. He had no power over her anymore. The relief of that gave her a fresh sense of freedom despite the cloudy look on Jeff’s bulldog face.
“How was our honeymoon,” he asked without any preamble. He cocked his head to the side in a defiant gesture she’d learned to recognize as his fighting stance. Usually he got that look right before he broke something. His two-toned eyes glared at her.
She was dying to tell him that the honeymoon was great. That she’d fucked more in one night than she had in the last five months with him, but common sense told her to keep that tidbit to herself.
“It was very relaxing, thanks.” She didn’t back up, didn’t invite him in. She watched his jaw clench and knew he was battling back his true feelings.
“Look, Casey…” He ran a hand through his blond hair, seemed as if he struggled to find words. “This whole thing…got out of hand.”
Really? Ya think? “You mean the whole ultimatum thing? Or the canceled wedding part?” She was dying to hear what he had to say and at the same time she didn’t give a shit.
“Look, I love you.”
She almost laughed. She could count on both hands the number of times he’d said those words over the years.
But he continued, “That’s not something I can turn off. I still want to marry you. You had your little rebellion. You took a vacation. I get it. We can still get married. We’ll just do something small or elope.”
Not for all the money in the world. She couldn’t wait to test this new proposition. Nodding, she considered his words. “I guess we can talk about it after the show.”
His eyes turned infinitesimally harder before he dropped his gaze to the ground and shook his head. “You’re not still planning on doing that piece of shit reality show are you?” He met her gaze. “You’re going to embarrass yourself and me. I can guarantee you’re going to regret putting yourself out there like that.”
The only thing she regretted was four wasted years with him. “I guess we’ll agree to disagree. So if your ultimatum still stands, then nothing’s changed.” Was this his idea of crawling back to her? What a joke. Just like their relationship.
His nostrils flared and his cheeks reddened. “I’m only going to say this one time. Do not go on that show.” The guy didn’t know when to give up.
“Or what, Jeff? You’re not going to marry me? Oh, wait. Been there, done that. Why do you care anymore? We’re not together. I’m not going to embarrass you.”
Every visible muscle tensed. “Of course you’re going to embarrass me!” he hissed. “All my family and friends know you and know we were engaged. All the people I work with. They’re all going to laugh at me when they see you on this joke of a show.” He took a step toward her and Casey eased the door closed a little more before he stopped. “It’s not like you have a chance at winning. Be real. I’ve read your stuff. You’re not that good of a songwriter.”
Just one of many knives he continually stabbed in her heart. She should be used to his cut downs, but they still hurt. “They can’t be that bad if I made the show.” She’d had to give them a sample of her work. That was only one part of the interview process. She had no idea how she managed to keep her voice so calm when all she wanted to do was wrap her hands around his thick neck and squeeze.
“I guess everybody gets lucky sometime,” he mumbled.
Son. Of. A. Bitch. “I’m going to do you a favor, Jeff.”
He glanced up, the hope—or maybe expectation—in his eyes fascinated her. He got that look when he thought he’d won.
“I’m going to make this crystal clear so you won’t stress about it in the future. I will not change my mind about marrying you and I am not changing my mind about the show. You can tell anyone in your life whatever reason you want about why we split. I really don’t give a shit. But the one thing you are not going to do is tell me how to live my life. I did that for four years and now I’m done. You almost managed to suck the life right out of me, but I realized it in the nick of time. I guess it’s a good thing you gave me an ultimatum. I might have married you otherwise.”
Casey tried to close the door, thrilled that for once she got the last word in. Except before it clicked shut, Jeff put his foot in the crack. A second later, he shoved the door open wide with a beefy forearm. The force threw her backward as he stalked inside. Her frustration at being a second too slow morphed into rising panic as she backed up.
“Oh no.” He shook his head.
Casey knew that voice, the body language, and it always scared the shit out of her, just as he always wanted it to. “Get out.” She needed her phone. Needed to call for help. How could she th
ink that because they weren’t together anymore, he wouldn’t want to intimidate her? God, where was Zoe? Jeff would never do something with a crowd. He was always Mr. Cool when he had an audience. He saved his tantrums for when he had her alone.
He’d never hit her before, but he’d destroyed property, a lot of property, mostly belonging to her. But he always replaced it with something newer and better. Always apologized and promised to work on his temper.
Yeah, like that ever happened.
But now, the cold, calculating hatred in his eyes scared the backbone right out of her. “I’m not going anywhere until I get what I want,” he said, closing the door behind him. “You know I always get what I want, Casey.” He locked the deadbolt and a shot of paralyzing fear cut straight through her middle.
Casey spotted her phone on the coffee table next to her purse and suitcase and backed up toward it.
“Where you going, baby?” Jeff taunted as he stalked closer. “Think you’re going to call someone?”
“Get out of my apartment.” She’d only been here a couple of weeks before the honeymoon trip and it hardly reflected her personality, but it was still her space. Just as she reached for her phone, Jeff sprang at her, knocked her back on the sofa with a hard forearm to her chest. Air rushed out of her lungs as her pulse spiked. Before she scrambled up, he straddled her on the cushion, towering over her like a beast with fangs, pinning her tight. “Get off me,” she gritted out. Beating at his chest one-handed, she wasn’t nearly strong enough to do any damage.
“I think you miss me, baby,” he said softly.
It was the calm that scared her. The vile intent in his eyes as his gaze raked over her pumping chest. He caught her third strike and locked her wrist into his meaty paw of a hand. Her other hand was trapped next her side by his thick thigh.
“Casey, Casey, it’s me. Remember me? Remember how much you love making me happy?”