by M. N. Forgy
“You going to rat me out to Babs? I hear that’s what you do best: ratting.” Griping Candy’s throat, the action takes me by surprise, but I don’t remove my hand nonetheless. Her eyes widen when my fingers begin to lightly apply pressure. I should feel her fear and let go, but all I feel is the rage drumming through my body and the pulse picking up in Candy’s neck beneath my fingers. Like a beast feeding off the fear in her, I relish in it and thirst for more. My vision begins to blur with rage and my body temperature rises quickly, making beads of sweat form between my breasts. My top clings to my back as my grip clamps down. The look of fear carved on Candy’s face becomes a look of a soul whose life has just flashed before its eyes. Her hands begin to claw at mine, leaving little red marks across my knuckles. Her face begins to redden, but I can’t let go for the life of me. I want to, but my fingers won’t obey.
“Dani!”
Snapping me from my fury-induced state, I look over and see Shadow standing next to me. The rage flees my system and my vision becomes clear. I turn back toward Candy and notice she is a hue of red and purple under my death grip. My breath hitches at what I’m doing, but I still don’t release her. My hand is ripped from Candy’s throat as I watch, her body collapsing to the floor like a slinky. She grabs at her throat and makes a horrible gasping sound.
“You could have killed me, bitch,” Candy rasps, her voice scratchy and strained. She’s right. I could have killed Candy; my actions were manic and unpredictable.
“Don’t ever fucking come near me again,” I threaten quietly. She looks up at me, her eyes spilling with tears, but I have no pity for her. She removes her hands from her throat and I instantly see bruising, making me feel queasy that I am capable of such a thing.
“Get the fuck out of here, Candy,” Shadow bellows, pointing off into the distance. Candy crawls to her feet and scampers off, sobbing.
“What the fuck was that?” Shadow growls. I shake my head, unsure. I’ve been back at the club a month and I’ve nearly killed three people. If Shadow hadn’t shown up, I know I would have killed her.
“I don’t know what I’ve become,” I whisper, shocked at my behavior. I look down and notice my hands trembling from the shock. The images of smeared blood from the guy I beat flash across my palms and I close my eyes, trying to wash the images away. Why couldn’t I let go?
Shadow backs me into the bedroom.
“You’re the Devil’s Dust.” I look at him, unsure what that means. “You have Hell’s fury inside you; it owns you and consumes your thoughts. There is no escaping it. The anger and darkness which is harbored within you will surprise you, making its presence when it sees fit,” Shadow explains.
“Outside of Devil’s Dust, where civilization casts people like us out because they don’t understand us— that is your prison. In here with us, this is where you are free; this is your family where we are alike and have each other’s back.” Shadow cups his hands to the side of my face and brings his forehead to mine.
“I feel like a monster, like I’m out of control,” I whisper. I feel the tears fall along my cheek and slide across my lips.
Shadow lifts my chin so I’m forced to look at him. “We are more alike than you’ll ever know,” he murmurs, looking into my eyes. I can see it, the beast which feeds off another’s blood is telling the dark creature which resides within me—the one just starting to rise from the nest—that me and Shadow are not so different from each other.
My bottom lip begins to tremble at the thought that I am capable of taking another’s life.
“What if I had killed her?” I question.
“You’re not a killer. A fighter, yes, but not a killer.” He runs his hands up and down my back.
“If you didn’t show up, I could have killed her, Shadow,” I insist, my voice stern.
“I’ll teach you to control it,” Shadow responds, nipping my trembling lip.
His connection is my comfort. I suck in his bottom lip and kiss him passionately. Shadow grabs me by the hips and plows my back against the wall as I fumble with the button on his jeans, so desperately needing the connection. Shadow pulls my shirt off and throws it to the side quickly, and then grabs my shorts. Helping him in a hurried daze, I pull them down along with my panties in one fast motion. I reach up and cup his cheek as I lock my lips with his feverously. Shadow grabs the hem of his shirt and pulls it over his head, breaking our kiss momentarily.
Within seconds, he brings his plush lips back to mine and grabs me by the hips. I wrap my legs around his waist as he spins us around and drops us on the bed. I feel his length, his proof of arousal; glide across my leg as he moves across me, leaving a trail of excitement behind. Shadow sits up and glides the head of himself against my opening, teasing me. I close my eyes and moan with frustration.
“Eyes,” Shadow demands. I open them and see his piercing blue eyes lock with mine.
“Don’t be gentle,” I whisper. I reach up and thrust my fingers into his thick hair. I need pain. I need to know I’m alive and not a walking ghost without a soul, incapable of remorse.
“I wasn’t planning on it,” Shadow states fiercely, slamming himself into me so deep he’s buried to the hilt. My back arches, and I sigh loudly with satisfaction.
Shadow slides his rock-hard chest over mine and pulls my hair roughly, moving my head to the side. He dives his mouth in and bites my shoulder, making my pleasure heighten to new levels.
Doing the things I have done, the inhuman, savage acts, which should cause a normal person to feel pain, like almost killing someone—they haven’t affected me that way. Not until the worst is over, anyway. Otherwise, I would have let go of Candy, and I didn’t. I know I wouldn’t have if Shadow hadn’t shown up.
I extend my arms as far as they will go and grab onto his firm butt cheeks, pushing him further inside me, wanting him to hit the back of my pussy. Feeling him slam as far as he can go causes me to whimper from the pain. Shadow tries to stall, but I urge him to continue by pushing his ass forward with my hands.
“Don’t stop,” I demand, my voice strangled from the lack of air entering my lungs.
Shadow sucks on my right tit hard, as he thrust into me relentlessly.
“Fuck yes,” Shadow growls when my nails dig into his back.
His hips begin to go faster, and my breathing becomes fitful as I feel my inner core become warm. My toes begin to curl and my eyes clench shut when I feel the peak of my orgasm try and surface.
A slap sounds through the room, followed by a powerful burning sensation on the right side of my thigh.
“Keep your eyes open,” Shadow grunts, my pain becoming his pleasure as I feel him begin to pulse inside me, his speed picking up when I begin to moan with each powerful thrust. A piercing warmth blooms from my thigh before a loud ‘slap’ echoes in the room from Shadow smacking my thigh once again. Pinpricking sensations of my release begin at my feet and extend to every nerve ending in my body as a bang explodes between my legs. My undoing Shadow’s vice, he comes quickly, moaning deeply into the crook of my neck. He thrusts a few more times before collapsing beside me. I look over and see him smile at my spent energy and inability to move.
“Sex helps,” I say with a grin.
“Yes, it does,” he agrees with hooded eyes.
***
Shadow takes me to work today. He seems more open with me since he has discovered I’m not so different from him. That last barrier of trust I feel like I couldn’t break through, I have since crushed with my darkness. Now we have each other to pull through the depths of violence and maybe together we will figure out a way to have mercy on those who cross the line of the Devil’s Dust.
“Hey, so next week is a fundraiser. I need you to bring a date and dress in something nice,” Mila informs me, redoing her blonde hair into a tight bun.
“A fundraiser?” I question, taking off my slippers.
“Yeah. I partner with another ballet studio in town, and once a year we have a fundraiser together. The gove
rnor will be there along with many other high profiles, so you have to be there,” she answers, shutting off the lights to the studio.
“Yeah, I’ll figure something out,” I say unsure. I finish changing, the whole time wondering how I’m going to swing bringing a date to this fundraiser. Shadow is not going to want to go.
I walk outside and see him picking his nails with a knife. When he looks up and sees me walking toward him, his face lights up.
“Someone’s happy to see me,” I chide.
“You got a nice rack, who wouldn’t smile,” Shadow says cockily.
I laugh and grab the helmet from him before swinging my leg over his motorcycle.
On the ride to the apartment, I think about how I’m going to ask a badass, outlaw biker to attend a ballet fundraiser, and to dress in a tux for that matter. My mind is a complete blank; I have no idea how that is going to happen. I am just going to have to go by myself.
I climb off the bike and hand him my helmet.
“What’s on your mind?” he asks, grabbing my wrist as I begin to walk away.
I look at him dumbfounded. How does he do that?
“I have to go to a fundraiser next week,” I finally say.
“So?” he responds flat.
“I’m supposed to bring a date.” Shadow eyes me quizzically. “And it’s a dress-to-impress event,” I croak.
“Fuck. That,” Shadow says, rushing past me.
“The governor is going to be there along with other important people.” Shadow stops suddenly and looks at me with those gorgeous blue eyes. “I understand if you don’t want to go, but I have to,” I shrug. Shadow looks off into the distance, the wind blowing his black hair around, he places his hands on his hips.
“What, and let one of those rich tools try and pick you up again?” he asks, looking at me with the most drop-dead smile.
I smile foolishly along with him. “So, you’ll go?”
Shadow grins even wider. “Yeah, I’ll go.”
Not being able to contain my excitement, I squeal with delight and jump at him. He catches me with his muscled arms and smashes his lips to mine.
“Only you could get me to dress in a fucking tux,” he whispers against my lips.
SHADOW
“Wake the fuck up, Shadow!”
“Go away,” I mumble into the pillow beneath my head.
The door is thrown open and slams against the wall.
“You’re going to miss church again,” Bobby whines.
I nearly fall out of bed trying to find my underwear, but ultimately, I find my pants and pull them on. Buttoning them up, Bobby throws a shirt laying on the floor at me. I grab my socks and pull them on, along with my boots without tying them. I lean over and give Dani a light kiss on the head as she sleeps, then I grab my cut and make my way towards the chapel. I remember Bull reaming my ass out for missing yesterday, he’s not going to be happy I nearly missed today.
The last three days have been a mess. The other day, I nearly missed a run with the boys because Dani and I were at the beach too long. I missed church yesterday because Dani and I were up all night playing strip poker, and last night we were up all night fucking, something I’ll never get tired of. Before Dani, there were nights I didn’t sleep, instead, I was doing runs or partying. But she is, by far, my favorite reason for not sleeping. She has my focus elsewhere and is a huge distraction, but I can’t say I hate it.
I push the doors open slowly, hoping I can slip in unnoticed when my foot trips over my shoelaces and I stumble in the chapel. Shit. I sit down in my chair and look around the table, all eyes are on me. My eyes stop scanning the brothers when I come across Bobby’s face of humor. He points toward my cut as if something is wrong. I look down and notice I have it inside out, so I pull it off and put it on right.
“As I was saying,” Bull continues, his eyes lifted with annoyance as he stares at me, “we have no leads on Babs’ hit and run, and apparently Locks doesn’t give a fuck.” I look at Locks’ place at the table and see he’s missing. He never misses church, what the hell?
“I got a hold of the tape myself, Prez, and you can’t see shit,” Old Guy admits, scratching at his chest.
“Wonderful,” Bull exhales with a heavy breath, rubbing his hands up and down his face. “Well, nothing suggests this is an attack on the club, but watch your backs just in case.” He slams the gavel down, dismissing everyone.
“Shadow, stay,” Bull roars. I look up and see Bobby laughing, clearly amused I’m about to get my ass chewed out.
Everyone leaves and I wait for my lecture.
“You’re unfocused and sloppy, why?” Bull asks, staring right at me with green eyes. They are like Dani’s but hers are more vibrant with youth. What do I say? I’m so fucking messed up in the head with your daughter I’ve become careless?
“It’s my daughter, isn’t it?” he counters, rubbing his scruff, which he’s let grow out.
I don’t respond.
“This is why I didn’t want you with her.” he sighs. “I need you focused and on your game, but I want to see my daughter happy, as well. Tell me, what I’m supposed to do?”
“It won’t happen again,” I lie, knowing full well it will.
“Right,” Bull says with a raised eyebrow. He knows I’m lying. “Get focused, son,” he mutters.
Dani
The next couple of days are filled with lots of sex; it’s our way to make up for lost time. Our bodies crave each other, needing the human contact to remind us we’re alive. I have seen Babs a few times but she just lays there. Sometimes she moans and I jump up in excitement that she may be awake, but she never is. Every day I have seen her, I’ve not seen Locks once, but Babs is a strong woman. She’s the glue to a broken family that needs her strength to keep them together.
I walk into the kitchen and see Shadow leaning against a counter in nothing but his underwear. His feet are crossed at the ankles and he’s eating out of a tub of chocolate ice cream.
I smirk as I walk to the fridge and grab some juice.
“You want me to make you something?” he asks, stuffing the tub back into the fridge. The thought of food has me feeling ill.
“Yuck. No, I’ll stick with my juice,” I say, sipping from the glass.
“I gotta go out of town a few days,” he says softly.
“Really?” I set my glass into the sink.
“Yeah. I’m hoping to be back in time for the event thingy, but I can’t make any promises,” he admits, shaking his head. I can’t even hide the disappointment on my face.
Shadow grabs me by the hips. “I will try like hell to make it back in time,” he promises, kissing my forehead.
I put on a fake smile and lie as I lay my head on his chest. “It’s okay. When do you leave?”
“Now.”
I close my eyes and take a heavy breath. I guess I’ll have to get used to him leaving at a moment’s notice.
“What are your plans for the day?” he asks, tangling his fingers through my hair.
“Work, maybe go dress shopping,” I reply. Even if he can’t make it to the fundraiser, I still have to go.
“I don’t want you shopping alone,” he demands, his tone serious.
I roll my eyes at his over-protectiveness.
“I’m serious, Dani,” he insists, lifting my chin with his thumb and forefinger.
“Fine. I’ll take Cherry.”
“Good.” He smiles, smacking my lips with his. His tongue tastes of chocolate as it glides along mine with eagerness.
Shadow eyes me as he walks to the door.
“Oh, and wear your property patch, damn it!” he growls before shutting the door.
***
Hey, wanna go dress shopping tonight? - Dani
Hell yes! - Cherry
I’m at work right now, but I get off in an hour. - Dani
I’ll come pick you up. - Cherry
After an hour of teaching little toddlers how to dance ballet—which usually just ends u
p in them spinning really fast in a circle, not listening the whole time—I sit outside and wait for Cherry.
I hear loud music as her red Bug comes flying into the parking lot.
“Hop in, bitch!” she laughs, pulling her sunglasses down the rim of her nose.
I smirk and jump in the car as she turns down the music and eyes me.
“What?” I ask nervously.
“I see you’re wearing your property patch,” she smirks, her hand pointed at my leather jacket.
I look out the window, not sure what to say.
“I’m happy for you guys. I was rooting for you two,” she admits, watching traffic.
I look to see if she is serious or being sarcastic but can’t really tell.
“So, a dress, huh?” she asks.
“Yeah. I’m going to a fundraiser for my work.”
“Is Shadow going?” she wonders.
“He was until he got put on a run today,” I say with a sigh.
“Too bad. I would love to see a biker in a suit,” she giggles.
“Man, I would have loved to have seen that,” I agree, laughing.
Cherry pulls up to some little store on the main strip.
“I love this place.” She climbs out of the car, staring at the storefront. “I think famous people shop here.”
I quickly jump out and look at the classy little brick store.
“Come on,” she calls, pulling the front door open.
Cherry eyes me from bust to waist and starts grabbing dresses off racks as we walk through the store.
“What about that one?” I ask, pointing to a flowing pink dress with flowers printed all over it.
“You’re not going to church. You got to dress in something a little flirty,” she scoffs, looking at the dress I just pointed at with disgust.
After her arms are completely full of dresses, we head to the dressing rooms.
I start looking through the dresses she picked out: a very short black one, lots of low-cut ones. Cherry has big boobs and would look killer in these, but I’m not so sure I would.
“I don’t think any of these would look right on me,” I protest, looking through the pile one last time.
“Here, try this one.” She slaps a dress over the top of the door.