Baby Tyler had only been born two weeks ago yet somehow he had managed to make major changes in all of our lives. Layla was calmer and more philosophical. She’d spurt out random monologues about the importance of some new interest she was passionate about. She’d read to the baby books that I barely understood and would play Mozart and Bach nonstop. She seemed to have grown into herself in 14 days, as if she were finally becoming the woman she was destined to become. Giving birth to Tyler changed her. Her flaws were filled. Anger was replaced with constructive analyzing. She matured. She became more beautiful, from the inside out. To me it seemed as if she had finally accomplished what she was born to do: be a mother.
As for me... I had no preparation for this at all. There was a time when my schedule was filled with tour buses and recording sessions and fans and concerts all over the world, and, next to Layla, those things seemed most important to me. They had prepared me for what I believe I was destined to do, be a musician. I had already fulfilled that destiny and was now living comfortably on the rewards of my successes. But platinum albums and millions of dollars earned provided me with absolutely no preparation for everything that followed. Nothing could have prepared me for fatherhood, and even if there was something, I was likely too blind or too selfish to see it.
What do you do after you’ve fulfilled your destiny and accomplished everything you ever wanted to do? What’s the next phase of your life? Is there a next phase?
I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up to see Layla gazing over me down into Tyler’s crib.
"Have you ever seen anything so perfect?" she asked me.
"Just once." Her gaze caught mine and an appreciative smile crept slowly on her face.
"Can you believe we’re parents? It’s astonishing. Even after all the mistakes we’ve made it’s like... it’s almost as if this is our clean slate. Tyler is giving us a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to start completely fresh and make a new life for ourselves. After everything we’ve been through Nick... Tyler is our future. He’s our opportunity."
"Opportunity for what?"
"To make it right." She gazed lovingly at Tyler and moaned softly. "And I must say, we have the most genetically perfect child in the history of mankind." She laughed. I laughed with her. And I had to admit that she was probably right.
For a moment the baby pouted. A tiny contortion on his fragile lips. And it was gone in an instant. "Did you see that? I think there was a little bit of you in that."
She laughed lightly. "I always could get my way with a pout."
"Oh there’s something I want to talk to you about. Let’s go into the living room." She followed me out of the baby’s room and into the living room. We settled down on the couch and she looked at me, a calm, relaxed expression on her face.
"What’s up?"
"I started a trust fund for Tyler."
"A trust fund? Nick he’s only two weeks old."
"Yeah but I wanted to make sure that when he’s my age he’s comfortable. That he can take care of himself. More than take care of himself."
"Well I guess you have a point. But it’s important for Tyler to learn that you have to earn your way through life. It’s not just handed to you. My life was handed to me. I was a trust fund kid and didn’t really have to work. Of course then I married a rich musician and had everything I wanted." She smiled and poked me in the ribs. "But you on the other hand, you earned everything yourself. It’s important for Tyler to do the same. I have to admit that there was a time when I just lived off of my parents‘ wealth and did absolutely nothing. Yeah I went to school and I was serious but not having to work denied me of those important life skills."
"Well of course we can set stipulations. Like he has to go to college and get good grades and whatnot. But honestly he won’t have to work. Ever. Unless he wants to."
"Exactly how much money is in this trust fund, if you don’t mind me asking?"
My face scrunched. "Ten million."
"Dollars?!" she practically screamed at me.
"Well there’s no possible way I can ever spend as much money as I have. Might as well go to my family. Otherwise it’s just wasted. Besides that will grow over time, earn interest and whatnot. By the time he's old enough to have it he'll be able to do whatever he wants."
"Don’t say that. Like I said you earned everything you made. You should be proud of that."
"I am." Our eyes lingered on each other for a moment. "And you shouldn’t be ashamed of being a trust fund kid. When I was growing up there were times when we had no money whatsoever. And believe me, it’s hard. I was lucky. And so were you. And there’s no reason why our son shouldn’t be just as lucky."
"Well I suppose you’ve got a point. It’s important that we raise him to be as normal as possible. Everyday I write about teen celebrities and rock star offspring and it’s as if they have no concept of what it’s like to have to work or be responsible. If they get in trouble their parents take care of it. Fifteen year old girls are wearing Roberto Cavalli dresses to night clubs and to them it’s just luxury after luxury after luxury."
I gave her a pointed look. "This coming from the girl with a Louis Vuitton closet."
She rolled her eyes but smiled. "Yeah but I used your credit card to buy those so it’s not really the same thing," she joked.
"You’re right though Lay. I don’t want Tyler to be pampered just because of who his parents are."
"Correction, you’re the famous one. I’m just Layla Garret."
"Yeah that’s another thing..."
Her eyes locked on mine again. She looked confused. "What?"
"Well we agree that we want our child to be as normal as possible but... "
"But what, Nick?"
"Well one day Tyler is going to realize that his mom and dad are sleeping in separate beds and are divorced."
"People do that all the time. What are you suggesting, Nick?"
I bit my bottom lip. "I’m saying I think we should try again."
"Try what again, exactly?"
"You and me. Us. I want this baby to be happy and normal. With a happy and normal family. What do you think?"
"A child doesn't need two parents to grow up normal. Single parents do a fine job every single day around the world. There is no need for us to subscribe to some old fashion notion of tradition. Especially when you and I are anything but traditional."
"I wasn't trying to imply otherwise. But those are those parents, those families. This is ours. I don't want Tyler growing up in a broken home. It's not fair to him and he should have as much normalcy as we can give him."
She gave me yet another pointed look. At least she looked like she was considering it. Maybe.
Chapter Thirty-Six
Damn you, Nick. Leave it to you to flub things up. Our lives were perfect. We stopped the fighting, we were living under the same roof and we had the most beautiful child ever created by two people. Now he wants to mess it all up?
No way. No possible way. I was infuriated. How was I supposed to move on with my life when he was proposing that we try and get together again?
"Layla?"
I mean, was I the only one mentally conscious during our marriage? He cheated on me. We fought. We had amazing sex, sure, but that’s not what a marriage is about. That’s not even what a healthy relationship is all about.
"Layla?"
Why is he fucking with my mind all over again? We’re supposed to be older, wiser and more mature now. We have a child for sobbing out loud!
"Layla!"
"What?!" I looked at Doctor Brown and sighed. "I’m sorry, what was the question?"
"What were you thinking about just then?"
"My stupid ex-husband. He wants to get back together."
"And how do you feel about that?"
Okay, that’s the last time. "You know what Doctor Brown? I don’t appreciate you asking me how I feel about every stupid little thing I say or feel. I’m obviously here to tell you so could you please cut it with the condescending
tone and just be a bloody therapist for once?"
"Okay Layla, let’s think of calming images. Say them out loud."
I hadn’t done calming images since that day I found Nick in bed with Vanessa Carrington. Okay. I closed my eyes. "My beautiful son. The smell of fresh-baked bread on a summer day. Nick. Making love to him. Kissing him. Him kissing me." My eyes opened and I found Doctor Brown eyeing me. "Okay so I’m horny. I haven’t had sex in... almost six months. I have needs too!"
"And there’s nothing wrong with those needs. You’re a woman."
"I’m so fucked up," I sighed as I buried my face in my hands. "I hate to get back with Nick just for the sake of the baby, but I also hate to admit that I could fall in love with him like I used to be. So hard. And along with all of that I just want to throw him down and have my way with him."
"Ahem. Layla, focus."
"With Nick.... I just need to be honest with him. Tell him exactly where I’m coming from."
"I think that’s a very healthy step in the right direction. You’ve come a long way, Layla."
For as much money as I was paying her, I sure as hell hoped so.
There was only one cure for the therapy I needed for my post-Doctor-Brown sessions: Shopping. Shopping for Tyler had been an expensive affair but Nick had insisted on paying for everything. He even insisted that I buy some things for myself, his treat. I wasn’t back to my normal size, pre-Tyler, but I was happy with my fuller figure. I felt more feminine than I had ever before. And, when dressed properly, sexier.
It probably wasn’t the best idea I ever had. But Nick said we should try to work things out. And technically, we worked best together when we were having sex; even better when we were making love. It’d have to work for the time being. Until we figured something out.
I unlocked the door and took a quick look around. No one was downstairs. "Nick?" I called out. A moment later he came casually down the stairs. He put a finger up to his mouth and motioned for me to go outside.
"Tyler’s asleep in my room. What’s going on?"
"How’d you get Tyler to sleep in your room?" What I wanted to ask is why the baby wasn’t in the nursery, but this was actually a good thing. And I had to admit, it was a bit of relief to come home and find the baby had been taken care of capably. I could relax and have some me-time.
"I put on some music."
"Journey?"
"Of course," he smiled. Of course.
"You look nice by the way." I leaned in and gave him a brief kiss on his cheek.
"Layla, are you feeling all right?"
"I just bought out Neiman Marcus; of course I’m all right."
"Did I pay for all of this? They're not going to rename the store in my honor, are they?" he winced.
"Not yet. American Express loves you, by the way."
"Fantastic. Well then I suppose you need help carrying everything in?"
"If you wouldn’t mind. You’re looking trimmer. Been working out a bit?"
"No." That was a little too blunt. Even for him.
"Well you look good. Maybe it’s those jeans."
Nick merely rolled his eyes. That is, until they bulged so far out of their sockets I thought I’d have to pick them up off the ground. I peeked up and saw him looking at the sea of shopping bags in the car, incredulous at the sight of all his money in my new clothes. "Layla, Jesus Christ!."
"Have I mentioned how nice those jeans look on you?"
"Layla you bought enough clothes to build another closet for."
"That’s actually a really good idea. Have you seen Jessica’s closet? Perfect!"
"Who’s Jessica?"
"Help me carry this stuff in." I eyed Nick as he leaned in and grabbed a handful of shopping bags. "Careful with those five bags right there!!!"
"Why?"
"Those are the Louboutins."
"Whatever."
"Actually, while you’re doing this I really have to make a phone call. Could you please just bring these up to my room?"
"You’re the boss."
Ooh. Yes I am.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
I watched as Nick’s eyes roamed over the shopping bags, which filled every corner of my bedroom and every square inch of my bed.
"Wow. When you shop, you really shop."
"It’s my therapy, Nick. Oh, by the way, Jack is going to baby-sit this afternoon."
"What? Why?" He seemed suddenly on the alert.
"Is that a problem?"
"We’ve only had him for a few weeks!"
I couldn’t help but laugh. "And we’ll have him until we’re old and wrinkled. I just thought that you and I could use a break for a couple hours. Besides, Jack’s been dying to visit with Tyler and I thought this would be a good time."
Nick gave me the most pointed look I had ever seen on his face. "So let me get this straight. Jack is babysitting our child so that you and I can have a few hours off from parenthood? Together?"
Sometimes I really think that Nick speaks English but hears in an entirely different language. "Well, yeah. Unless you don’t want to?"
"No, it’s not that. I’m just.... surprised."
Cue the doorbell. "That's him. Will you grab Tyler’s bag while I get him and answer the door?"
"Sure." He still looked perplexed.
I got Tyler from his crib and carried him to the door, where I found the most adorable Hudson standing with a bright smile on his face.
"Look, Tyler. It’s your uncle Jack. Can you say hi to Uncle Jack?"
"I can’t believe you’re letting me baby-sit so soon after the birth. Aren’t you supposed to be overprotective until he’s at least 25?"
"Well I know he’ll be in good hands. Nick just fed him about twenty minutes ago and so he’ll need a burping and a changing within the very near future. Think you can handle it?"
"Oh yeah. I’ve changed diapers before. One-handed, in fact."
"Well try it with both hands this time around. And please do remember that if anything happens we’re a phone call away and I’m fully prepared to murder you should anything truly horrific happen. So I hope you’ve signed your will."
His half-smile-half-smirk reminded me so much of Nick when he was younger. "Maybe I should rethink putting you in it, Layla."
"You’re too cute."
Nick appeared with the baby bag and a posessed look on his face. "Guard him with your life."
"You’re both crazy. Let’s hope my little nephew skipped those genes." He took the baby in his arms and snuggled against his ear, leaving a kiss on the soft tendrils of blonde hair on his head.
"Not likely." I kissed Tyler on his nose and gently rubbed my finger across the bridge of his nose before Jack took him and left. "Am I supposed to feel like I just handed over my soul to your brother?"
"I think so."
"Is that how you feel?"
"In spades."
"Me too." I shut the door and looked at Nick. Fatherhood was starting to look good on him. "Come on Daddy. Help Mommy find room in the closet for all of her pretty new things."
"When will he be back?" Nick was still staring at the front door.
"In four hours. Hey, could you do me a favor? Would you mind making me a sandwich while I start on the clothes? I haven’t eaten and I’m starved."
"Yeah sure. I’ll meet you in your closet."
"Done deal." I watched as Nick walked off. He had that look on his face like he was thinking too much. This might put a damper on things.
Less than five minutes later Nick entered my bedroom, opening the door with his hip as his hands balanced two places with food. "I put ham on yours becau..." he trailed off. He nearly dropped the plates to the ground but caught them before the food flew off the plates. "Layla..."
It might have been the dress I had slipped into. It might have even been the fact that my legs looked a mile long stacked in the 4-inch Louboutins. But whatever it was, it had worked. More than successfully. "You okay there, sport?"
"Uh, I, eh,
yeah, I am, eh, uh..." Totally incomprehensible.
"What do you think?" The dress couldn't have looked this good even if I was at my pre-baby weight.
"I uh, ahem," he cleared his throat. His eyes were all over the place. "It’s a really nice, um, dress, yeah. I better put these down." He set the food down on the dresser and looked back at me.
"You should see the detailing on this dress. It’s remarkable. It’s Zac Posen."
"Who?"
"A designer," I laughed. "Here sit down." He hesitantly cleared off a space on the bed and sat down. "Look how intricate the beading is." He looked and nodded his head. It was obvious he was trying so desperately not to look at me. "Actually, I like what’s underneath the dress better." With a quick zip the dress slid off my body and fell to the carpet in a cloud of beads and silk and taffeta. I could hear the breath catch in Nick’s throat. His eyes were glued to my chest where a black lace bra barely covered my fuller breasts. My once flat stomach still had a delicate curve, but I felt more beautiful than ever. "Nick are you okay? You look a little pale." I leaned down on my knees, in between his legs, as it were, and put a hand to his face. "Are you okay?" His eyes locked on mine and I could see them grow heavy. "Sweetie you’re burning up. Let’s get you out of these clothes."
I picked up the hem of his shirt and lifted it up, but only enough to reach the belt buckle on his pants. "Here, this will give you some room to breathe." I unclasped the belt and un-looped it from his jeans. "Better?" He just stared at me, his chest rising with each deep, slightly calm breath. "No you still look pale. Let’s undo this too." I unsnapped his jeans and unzipped them halfway. My eyes traveled up his torso to his eyes and I couldn’t help the devious smile that came upon my lips. "Better now?"
"Are you trying to seduce me?" His voice was deep and had a bit of rasp to it, like it had fought its way out of his body and into the air between us. It was sexy as hell.
I stood up and took his shirt with me, throwing it behind me onto the floor after it slipped off his body. My knees found a spot on the bed as I straddled him and placed a kiss on his cheek. "Is it working?" I leaned further down into him, pushing shopping bags off the bed and I laid him down. "Your move." His body responded beneath me and I ached to feel him.
The Romance of Nick and Layla (Parts 1-3) Page 19