I take a step back and grab her chin. I want to see her eyes when I ask her the question that could end us. “Truth, Addison. What do you want? Tell me what I can do, and it is yours. No questions, no arguing. This is all up to you.” Those were the hardest words, but yet the most truthful words I spoke. If she tells me to walk away, to leave her alone, I know I will, for her. I will not be the cause of her pain ever again. Her words stun me.
“Love me. Don’t leave me ever again.” I stare at her in disbelief. Is she really going to give me another chance? I should be out of those, but I need to make sure she said those words, and it isn’t my imagination.
“Repeat that for me, Lil’ Bit. I don’t think I heard you.” She giggles at me. Yes, fucking giggles. I am getting hopeful now.
“Oh, Tyler, you heard me. Quit trying to get your ego stroked. I said. Love. Me. Don’t. Leave. Me. Ever. Again. What is it with you and the English language?” Her little smirks and smart-ass comments are about to get her ass smacked, but I swear as cheesy as this is, I hear angels singing. I never thought those words would come out of her mouth. As much pain as I put her through, that emotion came pouring out of her when she was explaining what she had been through.
“How? Why? I don’t understand how you could even want me in your life right now.” Great, Tyler. Way to screw it up. I can’t quit while I am ahead can I?
The smile that breaks out on her face is beautiful. With tears streaking down her face and makeup smeared, her eyes seem light again. “It has always been you. I don’t know why, or how. I just know it’s always you.”
Simple perfection. That answer is just the truth. “I love you, Addison Leah Parker. Forever and Always.” I can’t wait. I bend and take my girl’s lips and kiss her like she is the air I breathe. That isn’t far from the truth. I tease her mouth, her lips, and her jaw. I stop before I get lost in her. I push her back and speak to her, and I hope she sees the conviction in my eyes. “You, and now Shiloh and Cheyenne, and how ever many others you want, are my life. You are my entire heart and soul. I can’t lose you again. I won’t leave you again. It has always been you. I love for you. I breathe for you. I will die before I allow myself or anyone else to hurt you again. This is it, back where we started; we found our way back.”
I can tell my girl doesn’t have words. She has that gleam in her eyes that speaks volumes. She wants me in every way. I want her more. She leans up on her tip-toes and can still only reach my neck, but I know she wants my lips. I just chuckle at her.
“It is not funny, Tyler. I swear I am going to start carrying around a step stool.” I just laugh at her. She steps back away from me and puts her hand on her hip, and I can see her getting feisty. Her height is not something she takes lightly. She hates it.
“You could just climb me like a spider monkey.” That didn’t impress her either. I give in. I bend down and pick her up so we are face to face. I am rewarded by a smile and wink. She doesn’t realize I would carry her everywhere. She leans her head towards me and nips my lip.
“I am not climbing you like a spider monkey. I really do wish you would curb your animal fantasies. That is disturbing.” Oh, my girl thinks she is cute. She is. I just take her mouth and shut her up. I meant to keep it sweet and gentle, but she has other ideas. She nips and sucks my lip in her mouth, and I swear I growl. She is playing with fire. I can feel her lips curve in a smile by my actions. I decide I will take charge; she has had enough time to be cute. I press my tongue in between her lips and feel her sigh. I suck her tongue in my mouth and take it prisoner. She grabs my hair and tugs; she knows that will set me off. I let go of her tongue and explore her mouth. No crevice is untouched by my tongue. I bite and pull her bottom lip and continue across her jaw to her ear. She has now wrapped her legs around my waist and is panting.
Before I tug her earlobe in my teeth, I whisper, “I love you. You are mine.” I know she loves when I get possessive. Good thing, because I have never hidden that trait. I tug her ear lobe and circle the shell of her ear with my tongue. The moan that comes out of her mouth causes me to bite down on her neck. I don’t know how I find the strength, but I stop. The look on her face is priceless. She thinks I have lost my mind, but I don’t want our “first time” to be rushed while we are sitting in the middle of a football field. I carry her over to our make shift picnic and set her down on the blanket. I am trying to gain some blood back in other regions besides my dick.
“I am going to make love to you, Addy. I just don’t want to rush. And I damn sure don’t want it to be on a football field,” I try to reassure her. I can tell I shocked her.
She looks at me and says, “Then take me to bed, or lose me forever.”
“Show me the way home, honey,” I throw right back at her, and we both start laughing. “Top Gun? Really, Addy?”
“Hey, when you are on bed rest, you will watch anything. Be glad I am not telling you, ‘nobody puts baby in a corner.’” God, I love this girl. “And I don’t think you will have any problem finding the way home; your dick has become your beacon.”
She has a point, because my dick is definitely standing at attention. “Keep up your smart mouth.” I am trying to warn her.
“Tyler, don’t you know I enjoy your punishments?” Shit, that is it. I reach down and start throwing all our stuff in that basket, and then I bend down, throw her over my shoulder, and take off towards my truck. I can hear her laughter the whole time. I say a silent thank you to her grandparents. No matter what, they never gave up on us, and I feel they had a piece of this. Before I put her in my truck, I smack her ass and tell her, “Behave.”
I send a quick text to Brielle and tell her, “Mission Accomplished.” She knows what it means. Time to get my woman home and woo the shit out of her . . . with her sister’s help of course. I try to not speed and take my time, so her sister has time to do what I wanted. I immediately get a text from Brielle, “Done . . . I had all the faith in your love, now show her. Fuck up again, I will cut your balls off.” God bless it, those Parker sisters (well Brielle is a James now, and hopefully Addy will be, too) will be the death of me.
I pull into her driveway, and I can see she is thinking. Her mind is going a mile a minute, and I hope I haven’t rushed her. I won’t push her for anything she isn’t ready for. She should know this. I take her hand and bring it to my mouth and drop a kiss on her knuckles. I open the door for her and usher her into the living room.
I told Brielle exactly what I wanted, and it is perfect, except for the air mattress. A fucking air mattress? I can’t help but laugh at that girl. The fireplace is going, and she has Addison’s wine in a bucket, my beer, too. Rose petals are spread across the entire room, and then an air mattress. Like we couldn’t make it to the bedroom? Addison starts laughing.
“Really? I can tell who did this. It is beautiful Tyler, thank you.”
Her smile isn’t reaching her eyes, and I don’t want her to assume anything. I would be happy just holding her all night. Happy . . . but in pain. “Lil’ Bit, the girls are taken care of. They are staying at Amelia’s. Yes, I had Brielle set this up for us, but not because I am expecting anything. I love you and would love to make love to you. I thought you wanted that, too. But we go at your pace. I just got you back and don’t want to scare you off.”
She has tears in her eyes. Shit, what did I say? “That isn’t it, Tyler. I love you and want to be with you. This is truly thoughtful and beautiful. I love you for taking care of everything.”
She isn’t telling me something, and I want her to be open with me. “What is wrong? Talk to me, beautiful.”
Chapter 23
Addison
I don’t know how to put into words how I am feeling. This is Tyler. He has seen me at my best and worst, and he loves me. I feel so stupid, and I am sure I am being vain. I am a girl, a woman, and I gave birth two months ago. I am trying to get through the insecurities of him leaving. We just stripped each other bare with our honesty and truths less than an hour ago. Thi
s should be no big deal.
I hear him pleading, “Please.” And I know I have to be honest. Oh, God, this is hard.
Taking a deep breath, “Tyler, I had two kids. I gained weight. I have stretch marks. I am not that same girl. This is like my first time all over again, and I have the same feelings of not wanting to disappoint you. But I just don’t feel as sexy as I was. You could have any girl, and I don’t want you to see me like I am.” Yeah, smooth move Addison. Word vomit your way out of having sex that you desperately want.
“Lil’ Bit, look at me. You are the most desirable, beautiful, and sexy woman I have ever seen. Nothing could change my mind. No, you aren’t that same girl. You are a woman, a woman who carried and gave birth to my babies. You are the woman I am completely in love with. You are more desirable to me than you were eleven years ago. You are my world. I desire you. I want you. And I love you. Let me show you.”
Could he be more perfect? Here he is . . . beautiful, in shape, and god-like . . . and he wants me. I just nod at him, and he takes me in his arms and picks me up. He carries me over to the air mattress and lays me down gently. I see him reach up and hit my stereo, then I hear Garth Brooks “To Make You Feel My Love” playing through the speakers. I swear this man is the stuff dreams are made of. Yes, I know he isn’t perfect. We all have our flaws, but I love him unconditionally. I know many don’t understand, especially after he left me time and time again, but he has brought me more joy than pain. He holds my happiness and future in his hands, and I have to trust he won’t throw it away. It isn’t blind faith. While he has destroyed me, he has also built me up and held me together.
He gently kisses me, and my mind shuts off. His lips set me on fire gently brushing mine, whispering love and commitment. He keeps telling me how beautiful I am, and he believes it. He slowly unbuttons my shirt and takes it off my shoulders, followed by tiny soft kisses across my collarbone. When he lifts his head up, and I see the love shining in his eyes, I feel the tears gather in mine.
“Hey, no tears. I love you, Addison. No more tears.”
“You make me feel beautiful. You make me feel wanted and cared for. These are good tears, Tyler. I love you.”
“You should feel those every day. I do love you, I do want you, and I more than care for you. I need you; I crave you.”
Once he has taken my shirt and bra off, he takes his shirt off. I love his chest. I reach up and run my hands over him. I have missed him. I missed his heat, his strength, his safety. I lift up and lick my way up his chest to his neck, and I hear his hiss as he sucks in a breath. All that for me. He reaches between us and takes my pants off and caresses every inch of my body. His tongue traces from my ear to my stomach. I ache for his touch, his love. I undo his shorts and shove them down, and as usual, my man is commando. I smirk up at him, realizing some things don’t change. He just smiles at me and takes my lips in a soul-shattering, panty-melting kiss. I could have an orgasm from his kisses alone. It could be that I am a horny bitch and haven’t had sex in almost a year, but it was always like this with him. He ignites my soul, makes me feel so much that I don’t know where he stops and I begin.
“I need to taste you. It has been too long.” With that he rips my panties and his head is between my legs. He isn’t tasting; he is eating. Biting, nipping, sucking, licking . . . devouring. I need more. He brings his hand to join his mouth, gently slips two fingers in, and immediately works me up to the edge. Right before I go over, he withdraws his fingers. I scream out in frustration, and he immediately replaces his fingers. It takes me no time at all to find my release, my bliss. Only this man can bring me it. He brings me down from my orgasm and kisses his way back up to my mouth. I take his mouth and can taste the pleasure he just brought me. My hands are roaming over his body, and I want to feel every inch of him.
“I love the taste of you. I could live off it alone, Addison.” The things he says and does with his mouth should be outlawed. “Before the night is over, I will have more of that taste. I want to go to sleep with that in my mouth, every single night.” He takes his dick in his hand and begins stroking it. Holy hell, that is hot. He knows I love that. Seeing him pleasure himself while he is looking at me brings me to my knees, literally. I bring my hands to help him and he shoves them away. Stroke after stroke, I watch and pant. Then his mouth starts.
“Baby, I have missed the feel of you around me . . . on me. Your mouth . . . your pussy . . . every inch of you, I want on me.” I can’t stop the visual flying through my mind. We have done sweet and slow, rough and hard, and everything in between. He doesn’t give me much time to play memory lane because he is immediately thrusting into me. “Shit, Addison. You feel so good. So wet, so tight. Just for me. I do this to you.”
“Yes, Tyler. You own me. My body, my heart, my soul.”
He pulls all the way out and slams into me. Fuck me. Well, he is, but shit that feels incredible. He does it a few more times and then slows his pace and makes me feel every inch of him. I have had enough slow. I flip him over, and raise above him. I ride him, fast and hard. I am on the brink of another orgasm, and hearing him scream my name unravels me. As soon as I let go, I feel him reach his release. Before I can catch my breath, he flips me back over and starts kissing my face. All I hear is how beautiful I am, how that was amazing, and how much love he has for our family. Family . . . shit! No protection.
I fucking cannot believe we didn’t use anything. I immediately start freaking out, and he pulls out of me. Yeah, no post-coital bliss here. “What is wrong?” he asks me.
“Well, we just had amazing, mind-blowing sex, and you didn’t use protection.”
He just shrugs his shoulders like it is no big deal and drops a kiss on my forehead. “I am not on the pill, Tyler.”
“Okay.”
Okay? Fucking okay? No it isn’t okay. I just had twins, alone. He left me. He didn’t want kids. Before my mind is totally out of control, he grabs me and stares in my eyes. “It is okay, Addison. Pregnant or not, I am here. I would love to have more kids with you. Yes, I would love it. I would be there for all I had missed before. If you want more – then great. If not, we have two kids already. It is more than okay.”
He instantly calms me. Not that I am one hundred percent sure, but I think this will be okay. The last thing I hear before I fall asleep is him whispering his love for me, and I feel the safety of his arms.
When I awake the next morning, he is still holding me and watching me sleep.
“Good morning, baby.” And he bends and gives me a kiss.
“This isn’t a dream?” I ask him.
“No it isn’t, Lil’ Bit. I am here. I am not going anywhere. I will tell you that every morning if you need me to. But I am changing my daily question. Since we are definitely more than co-parenting, I will now ask, together or married? Your choice, Addison.”
Shit. I don’t know how to answer that. “Coffee?” I shyly ask him. I hope he will drop it. He chuckles at me.
“You are off the hook this morning, but you have to answer me some time.” We both wake up and start cleaning up our mess, so we can go get our girls. This is my happy. Right here, with him and our family. I just need to let go of these last doubts. I can do it.
July 2017, Race Weekend
This weekend is not starting out on the right note. Dropping off the kids, well, it was a disaster. We had some errands to run before heading to the airport, and Brielle’s mouth got out of hand, which ended up with CJ spouting, “dipshit,” quite a few times. Colby was pissed and made a huge deal out of it, which in turn made CJ keep repeating it. I wasn’t much help because I was dying laughing in the back seat, so now Colby is pissed at me, too. As Brielle told him, “Get over it.” When we dropped the kids off with his parents and Amelia, CJ busted out with it again, and Colby’s mom slapped him and Tyler and blamed them for the whole thing. Brielle ate that shit up and agreed with her. Oh, then we decided since we were flying into Orlando, we would stay here tonight and go to City Walk. The g
uys aren’t so down with that idea; they get all paranoid when we want to go out. So my sister told them they could just hang out at the hotel if they didn’t want to come. That didn’t go over too well, so as we suggested earlier, we are all going out.
Tyler and I are doing great. He is an amazing father and lover. He asks me every morning, “together or married?” and I answer with coffee. I know I am not dealing, but I don’t want to jinx anything. Just one day at a time is my motto. Okay, I am a chickenshit.
I walk out of the bathroom after finishing my make-up, and right away Tyler shakes his head at me. “What?”
“You aren’t wearing that, Addison. We aren’t at home where everyone knows you are taken. I don’t want to sit in a jail in Orlando. You need to go change.”
He is kidding, right? I have on shorts, a tank top, and cowboy boots. Yes, my shorts are short, but he does not dictate what I wear. I am a mom, but I am only twenty-seven. He is being unreasonable.
“Nope, not changing. Nothing wrong with what I have on. Let’s go.” I don’t give him a chance to say anything else as I walk out of the room. I get to Colby and Brielle’s room and knock. She answers and walks out with a grin, while Colby is shaking his head from behind her. He growls at her to stop, but she keeps on going. Fuck me. This is going to be a wonderful evening.
We make it down to the hotel restaurant, and I can tell Colby and Tyler are sulking like two year olds. Brielle leans towards me and says, “Ignore them. They don’t like our outfits, but we are away from home. Time for us to be us with no babies and no responsibilities. These Neanderthals think they are stopping my fun. They just upped the ante with their childish behavior. I was going to behave.”
Parker Sibling Series Box Set Page 26