by Rhonda Helms
He stilled, his hands locked at his sides. “Were you out with another guy last night? Is that why you’re suddenly done, because you’ve already moved on?” There was an obvious flare of jealousy in his words.
Oh, no. He didn’t get to come here and play jealous boyfriend. “What I do is my business. It stopped being your business when we broke up.” When he’d decided he’d rather make out with his coworker than reach out to me, who’d been almost starved for his affection.
West blinked. “So that’s it, then? You’re not even willing to try?”
I felt my heart contract—out of pain, out of awkwardness, out of sadness for something that never had existed at all except in my head. I needed to be done with this. I shook my head. Moved toward the door.
He gave a huff of displeasure. “Fine. Enjoy your life, Natalie.” With loud stomps, West charged down the stairs and slammed the building door open.
I knew he meant it sarcastically, but that actually was my plan. To enjoy my life. I keyed the door, heart racing, and closed it behind me.
A flutter of pride lit in my chest. I’d done it—stood up for myself. Not caved to bend to his needs, his wants. It was my natural inclination to be a people-pleaser. But it was high time I was a Natalie-pleaser too. Living my life around the needs of others meant sometimes I was left holding the short end of the stick.
I kicked off my shoes, tossed my coat in the small hall closet and grabbed a bottle of wine from the fridge. Poured myself a glass and turned the radio to my favorite station. Let the music take away the lingering anxiety from the confrontation with West.
It was a typical Monday at work, which felt more Monday than usual since I was back from my vacation. I was on morning shift, and the chaos was a bit more hectic. I rushed into the nurses’ station and looked for any notes concerning my patients. Nothing new. I grabbed my stethoscope from my bag, looped it around my neck and made my rounds.
When I got to Mrs. Jackson’s room, I saw her sitting in a chair, watching some old black-and-white comedy from the ’50s. Thankfully she had on clothes. It was the little things in this job some days.
“How was your weekend? Did you have a good New Year’s?” I asked her as I checked her vitals and recorded them. The woman was a bit eccentric but healthy as a horse. She’d probably outlive me.
She leaned toward me and winked. “It was great. I got felt up at the New Year’s Eve party.”
It was hard to not glance down at her sagging chest. Though my face burned because really, was I any better? Getting my groove on in the bar bathroom, of all places?
Her lips quirked. “I see someone else did too. Good for you, girl.”
Oh, good grief. The heat surged down my throat, across my chest. Apparently I had a sign on my head that proclaimed I’d gotten lucky on New Year’s Eve. Lovely. I cleared my throat. “How’s that cough? Healing up okay? Your lungs sound pretty good. Take a deep breath for me.”
“When I was younger, I used to date everyone,” she declared on her exhale, sticking her chest out so I could hear her breathing with my stethoscope. “I broke many hearts back in my time.”
“I bet you did.” I squeezed her shoulder and grinned. The naked thing probably didn’t hurt her chances with guys either. “If you need anything, just call.”
I hit Mr. Franklin’s room next. In a rush of excitement, he waved a picture at me of his new grandson. Apparently his granddaughter had finally had the baby. “And they named him Thomas Josiah.”
My heart warmed for him. They’d used his name as the middle name. I gave him a hug. “I love that name. So glad everything’s going well.”
“They’re gonna bring him by in a couple of weeks,” he said then hacked into his hand.
Hm. That cough wasn’t sounding too great. I scribbled a note on the chart as I frowned. “I’m gonna have the doc drop by this afternoon to listen to your lungs, okay? We want you nice and healthy by the time the baby comes.”
“Yes. Good idea.” He nodded and leaned back in his chair. Closed his eyes and sighed.
I left him alone and went to a few more rooms. When I dropped by Mr. Brewster’s room, I found him curled on his bed, still under the blankets. Unusual for him. I shook his shoulder. “Hey, you okay?”
He rolled over and faced me, and I saw tears glinting in his eyes.
“What’s wrong, Mr. Brewster?” I pressed. “Are you feeling ill?”
“Miss Feinstein broke up with me,” he said on a huff. With a gnarled hand, he swiped at his wet face. “She didn’t think we were suited for each other.”
My heart splintered for him. He’d had a crush on her for so long, and to have her dump him like that had to hurt. “My boyfriend and I just broke up too,” I said, hoping it would help him feel less alone. “It really stinks. But that means you’re free to explore a relationship with someone who you’re meant to be with. At least that’s what I’m telling myself. He and I weren’t well-suited, but now I can find someone I connect with.”
Kyle’s warm eyes from when I’d left the car popped in my head, and I swallowed. I’d been trying like crazy to not think about him over the last few days. But the more I told myself not to, the more he came into my mind.
Mr. Brewster paused, eyed me. “Hm. That’s true. You’re pretty smart for a kid.”
I gave a wide grin. “I try. It helps to be surrounded by such intelligent people at my work.”
His chuckle eased the knot in my chest, and he sat up. Rubbed at his thinning white hair. “Guess I should get out of bed. Can’t have her seeing me a mess.”
“No way. You have things to do.”
He nodded. “Right.”
“I’ll be back later to check on you, okay? Just call me if you need anything.” My heart was a bit lighter as I worked my way to my last room. Mr. Raphael—the crabby man who pretty much hated everyone.
Well, he wasn’t going to steal my good mood today. I needed to stop letting others have control over my emotions. Look at poor Mr. Brewster, curled up in bed, hurting. That could have been me. The risk one took when falling in love—sometimes it didn’t work, but when it did… So worth it.
I paused with my hand on the doorjamb of his closed door. Strange that after a breakup I could still be an optimist. But I believed in love, knew it was out there. I’d been around too many happy people to think otherwise. My parents spent all of their free time together and still acted like honeymooners. Yeah, that hadn’t been so great for me growing up, hearing their nighttime activities several times a week, but now I could understand it.
I rapped on Mr. Raphael’s door. “Sir, it’s Natalie. I need to take your vitals.”
I heard a gruff, “Fine, come in,” and walked into the room. The blinds were pulled shut, and the only light was from the TV, which cast a pale blue glow over the bed and chair.
“I have to turn on the light,” I told him and flicked the switch.
He sputtered and blinked as he held up a thin hand over his eyes. “God, that’s bright.”
“Sorry.” I made speedy work of checking his vitals, wrote them down and showed him the chart. As he looked it over, I eyed the room and saw a chess board there. “I don’t know how to play chess.”
“Not surprised,” he said with a knowing look, thrusting the documents back at me.
Rather than being offended, I surprised both him and myself by barking out a laugh. “You know what? I’ve had a pretty crazy few days. But I can always count on you to be exactly the same. Thank you for that.”
His eyes narrowed and he studied me like I’d gone off the deep end. Or maybe like he figured I was mocking him. After apparently realizing I wasn’t, he sighed. It seemed like the pissiness had seeped out of him. “You’re a strange girl.”
I nodded. Probably right. “I’ll be back later to check on you.”
As I turned to go, I heard him mutter, “If you wanna learn, I’ll teach you.”
I paused. Looked over my shoulder. My heart skipped a beat or two. “Really?
That would be great. I’ve always wanted to try it.”
He waved me off. “It’s not a big deal. You’ll probably get bored and quit it anyway.”
Underneath that gruff exterior was a man who’d used that shell to protect himself. But he’d allowed me a glimpse underneath. “With a teacher like you, I doubt I’ll be bored,” I retorted with a chuckle and left.
Something about that encounter stuck with me for the next several hours as I went about my day, answering calls, helping with baths and breakfast, sorting out drama. He reminded me of Kyle with the unexpected openness. There was a deep, resonant satisfaction in being the person to break through the shell. Maybe that was why Kyle had lingered in my head for this long.
He’d let me in that night, shown me glimpses of his emotions that I’d never come close to seeing before. I knew it, and he knew it.
And I also knew I wanted to experience that again. Crazy as it sounded, a deep-down part of me itched to crack him open more and find out what had made him the way he was.
Chapter Eleven
My feet throbbed as I made my way toward the nurses’ station, and my lower back had a dull ache. Good grief, what a busy day. I rubbed my spine and groaned as I thumbed the muscles along my back.
The overhead speakers chirped. “Paging Natalie Goldsmith,” a light voice said in a lilting tone that filled the hallway. “You have a visitor at the nurses’ station.”
Who would be visiting me at work? Maybe Bianca. Sometimes she got bored and dropped by to say hi or bring me a pastry. I could use a sugary treat right about now.
I sped up my pace, achy back and feet forgotten, and turned the corner to find Kyle standing there, talking with today’s head RN, Shandra. I swallowed a gulp of surprise and padded toward the desk.
She spotted me and gave a knowing smile, her bright red lips curved. “Here’s your visitor.”
Kyle turned to me, and my heart lurched at the unexpectedly intimate look in his eyes. His lips were parted, and I had a crazy urge to lean up and kiss the curve of his lower lip.
“Hey,” he said in that throaty voice that made me want to purr.
“Hi.” I cleared my throat. “So. Um, how did you know I worked here?”
He raised one eyebrow and stared at me.
Oh, right. Private investigator. Duh. My face burst into heat. “Yeah, don’t say a word about it. Sorry. My brain is mush.” I glanced at my watch. My shift was over in about ten minutes. “So, is everything okay? Did you need to see me about something?” It was the most subtle way I could think to prod him into talking. I was dying to know what he wanted. After all, his case about West was over and solved.
And surely he wouldn’t come here at my job to talk about…that night. Would he?
“Can I get a tour of the facilities?” he asked smoothly.
I blinked.
There was a twinkle of something in his eyes as he looked at me. Oh, he wanted to move away from where we were being watched. That got my hands fluttering. I stuffed them into my shirt pockets.
“Um. Yeah, sure. Okay.” A glance at Shandra, who was standing off to the side, not-so-subtly eavesdropping, confirmed that was fine. She waved me off with a huge smile.
I showed him around. We were a small building, but it was well taken care of, with a large room for activities, a currently unused patio and expansive grounds. Our cafeteria had room to seat everyone comfortably. Kyle didn’t say much of anything, just walked by my side as I blathered on. But he got a lot of attention. I saw several of our residents eyeing him with bold interest.
Wonderful. This would get around the gossip loop for sure. West had never visited me here, so they weren’t accustomed to seeing me with a man. I couldn’t wait to hear the ribbing this would cause.
We passed rows of open doors until we came to Mr. Raphael’s closed door.
“Who’s in there?” he asked with a thumb hitched in that direction.
I sighed. “Mr. Raphael. He’s not a fan of uninvited company.”
“Martin Raphael?”
“You know him?”
He huffed a slight chuckle. “My great-grandpa was chess buddies with him while I was growing up. He’d come over to Sunday dinner sometimes, and I’d watch them play.” Before I realized it, he was rapping on Mr. Raphael’s door. “It’s Kyle Winslow. Ben Winslow’s great-grandson.”
There was a moment of silence. Then, “Huh. Kyle. Come on in, boy.”
I stood there in utter shock as Kyle sauntered into the room. The two men shook hands like they were old buddies, Kyle catching him up on what his family had been up to. Even more shocking was the look of actual happiness on the old man’s face. Well, as much happiness as he could muster. It seemed like it almost physically hurt him to curve his mouth into a smile.
The man patted Kyle on the back. “Gotta come by and play a game with me sometime.”
“I’d be happy to. I didn’t know you were here or I would have visited before.”
As they continued to talk, moving on to the upcoming baseball season, I stood in the doorway, just letting them have the moment. My heart had softened into a pile of melted butter. It was good to see Mr. Raphael not as wound up, and that someone was going to visit him. I had no doubt Kyle would keep his word.
He was that kind of man.
And the fact that I realized this about him, with no hesitation, made me study him in a new light. All these years, I’d been so quick to judge him, but there was far more to the guy than what I’d let myself see.
They shook hands once more, and Kyle clapped him on the back. Then with a quick wave of his hand, Kyle left, closing the door behind him.
“Thank you,” I said in a low voice as we walked toward the nurses’ station.
“For what?”
“For that. No one ever comes to see him, and I try, but…” I shrugged. “It’s not the same when I tell him hi or attempt to pull him out of his shell. He probably just thinks I’m there because I’m paid to be.”
“I don’t think so.” Kyle’s gait was slow, steady beside mine. “He’s just a bit closed off, out of touch with his feelings.”
I grabbed my coat and purse, waved goodbye to the nurses lingering at the desk and headed to the front door, Kyle still at my side. I could feel a dozen eyes at my back, and I tried to not turn around and shoot them warning glares.
When we got outside, I dragged in a deep breath of cold air and smiled. Yeah, I was tired, but now I was done with work. And Kyle was here, an unexpected pleasure. Well, I hoped anyway. His presence was making me a bit off kilter. I couldn’t stop thinking about the way he’d felt kissing me, and I wanted more.
“Okay, so…” I swallowed and kept my gaze on the asphalt. “What made you drop by and see me?”
He was quiet for a moment as we wove between cars on our trek toward mine. “Honestly? I don’t know. I just wanted to see you.”
“Do you wanna have dinner?” I blurted out.
He paused, and I stopped too. Looked at him. Everything felt different for some reason. It wasn’t the frantic sexual vibe thrumming between us now. No, the energy was a little softer, a little sweeter. Infinitely more dangerous to my heart.
Each time the puzzle of Kyle had another piece filled in, I found myself wanting more.
Kyle shifted on his feet then turned his eyes to me, and I saw the conflict in there. Crap. My heart sank, and I wished I hadn’t said anything.
“It’s okay. Never mind. I’m sure you’re busy.” I dug into my purse when we reached my car to get my keys out. The action allowed me a moment to swallow past the tightness in my throat. “Let’s forget I asked.”
A gentle touch on my elbow made me pause.
“Natalie.” The word was whispered, and a shiver slid along my skin at the roughness of the way he’d said my name. I wanted more, even if it was dumb to. “We should talk.”
A nervous laugh slipped out. “That sounds foreboding. We’re not even dating, so this can’t be a breakup chat.”
&n
bsp; He rolled his eyes. “Look, that night…”
“Just happened, and it wasn’t a big deal,” I finished with a casual shrug that didn’t reflect what I was thinking. On the inside, my organs felt like they were shrinking. I didn’t want to stand here and hear how he’d enjoyed the sex but he wasn’t interested in more.
“Was amazing,” he corrected, and I paused. Looked at him, saw sincerity on his face. “I hadn’t expected it, and it kind of threw me out of whack for a few days.”
“Me too,” I admitted. I shivered when the wind plowed between the cars to slam into my face. “Can we sit in my car to talk instead of out here, where I’m freezing?”
“Okay.”
Inside wasn’t much better, but at least the wind wasn’t cutting. I cranked the heat on and let the car idle to warm up. Nervous tension thickened in my chest and made it hard to breathe. I forced myself to focus on minute things, like fiddling with the thermostat and changing the radio station.
“You deserve honesty,” Kyle said out of nowhere, and my hand paused. “I’m not looking for a relationship right now, and I wanted to be open and upfront about it.”
I nodded. No big surprise there. I refused to think about the tiny sting in my ego.
Then he reached for my hand, drew it into his lap. His fingers danced across my skin, and I found myself shivering for a whole different reason.
“But I’m drawn to you, Natalie. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since that night.”
I turned my head to face him. His eyes were heavy-hooded, his lush lips parted. “Me neither.”
“I’d like to explore this…thing between us.” He flipped my hand over and stroked his index finger along my palm. My brain remembered where those clever fingers had been on my body, in my body, and I dragged in a rough breath. “Just to see what happens. No rules, no commitments. Is that something you want too?”
I wasn’t normally one to date around, even though Bianca had always encouraged me to give it a shot. I liked to be in a steady relationship, had done so since I was in high school. But maybe having a casual thing with Kyle would be fun, less pressure. Could I do it without my feelings getting tangled along the way? Was this worth the risk?