by Heidi Champa
“Wiseass. I gotta go. Bye, everyone,” Daniel called as he left.
Kelsey bopped over to me and smiled, her upper lip tucked up so high I could see all her teeth. Another face Michelle pulled all the time. Kelsey clasped her hands together and gave it one last try.
“Please, U Dub. Please?”
It seemed impossible to say no, so I relented before I could think better of it.
“Okay, fine.”
I moved to pick up the car keys, but Kelsey stopped me.
“You’re not going to leave the house wearing that, are you?” Kelsey asked, picking up her bag.
I looked down at my T-shirt, which was emblazoned with the logo of my favorite gay bar in the city and included the word fuck. Suppressing a laugh, I tried to defend myself.
“I wasn’t really planning on leaving the house today. Or ever.”
“Obviously,” she said, her hand back on her hip.
“So, what? No good for the drop-off line?”
“Uh, no.”
“So I should change?” I asked with a grin. Before Kelsey could answer, Tina laughed, her own briefcase in her hand.
“Please do. I don’t want to get a call from the school,” Tina said before checking her watch.
I slipped on a more appropriate shirt and met Kelsey in the driveway. As soon as Kelsey got into my car, she fiddled with my radio until something that sounded terrible started blaring out of the speakers. Next, she rolled down my windows and started singing along. I reached for the volume knob, but she stopped me.
“Don’t! This is a great song.”
I shook my head and lowered the noise anyway.
“I don’t think great is the word I’d use.”
She rolled her eyes as I pulled up to the stop sign of their cul-de-sac.
“God, you really are old.”
Her words dripped with the kind of disdain only a teenager could have for an “old” guy like me. I took umbrage with her assessment immediately.
“When I was your age, I—”
She put up her hand and sighed.
“I beg you not to finish that sentence. Dad says that stuff like all the time.”
I laughed, realizing that I’d almost broken my cardinal rule, which was to never sound like Daniel or my father. Perish the thought.
“Sorry. Now, you want to talk about old? Let’s talk about your dad. He’s eleven years older than me, you know.”
Her focus was on her phone, but she was smiling.
“I do. You tell me all the time.”
“Just trying to make a point. I’m not that old. And I do like some good music. In fact, you like Lady Gaga, right?” I asked, hoping for the right answer.
She looked at me like I had eight heads.
“Duh, of course.”
“Thank God.”
I pressed Play on the CD player and put myself out of my misery.
“You still have CDs?”
“Yeah,” I said defensively.
Kelsey shook her head as I pulled onto the main street, the warm spring air coming through the windows.
“Shut up and sing, young lady.”
When I pulled into the school parking lot, we were singing “Poker Face” at the top of our lungs. Kelsey paused long enough to tell me where to go, and as I pulled up to the curb with the other dutiful parents, I turned the music down so I wouldn’t have to shout at her.
“Well, here you are. Have a good day.”
“Thanks, U Dub. Told you it would be fun.”
“Don’t get used to it, kid. I plan on sleeping late in the future.”
A dark-haired girl leaned into the open window, and Kelsey squealed. After a flurry of overlapping sentences, they stopped and Kelsey looked at me.
“Hey, Maya. This is my Uncle Wes.”
She nodded in acknowledgment, but they were soon back to talking a mile a minute. I was stuck, the cars in front of me at a standstill. The line of people heading out of the parking lot seemed to be having the same issue. I turned to look at the car stopped next to me, heading in the opposite direction, and my eyes went wide. The guy behind the wheel was hot. Really hot. His dark hair was closely cropped in a boring dad style, but it was his eyes that caught my attention. They were a blue so pale, they almost looked silver, and they completely transfixed me. He flashed me an amazing smile, and for a moment, I thought I was seeing things. Until Kelsey broke the spell with a furious wave right in front of my face.
“What are you doing?” I asked her, slightly angry she’d killed the moment.
“That’s Maya’s dad. Mr. Montgomery.”
The girls waved again, and he laughed. I was surprised when he leaned out his window a bit and spoke to me.
“Don’t remember seeing you around here before.”
God, his voice was deep and amazing. I cleared my throat and hoped my own voice didn’t crack.
“You haven’t. I’m Kelsey’s uncle. Wes Green. She talked me into this.”
He gave a knowing nod and tapped his fingers against his steering wheel.
“Sam Montgomery. I’m stuck in this line because my daughter can’t get out of bed on time to make it on the bus.”
Maya and Kelsey were back to talking, oblivious to us.
“I’m not planning on making this a habit. I’m staying with my brother at the moment and got suckered in by someone who always gets her way.” I tried to ignore the fire this guy had started in my belly. My mind wandered to very inappropriate territory for a moment, barely hearing him when he started talking again.
“Teenage girls are far too persuasive, if you ask me,” he said with a grin.
I laughed and hoped to God I didn’t sound ridiculous. I realized a moment too late that I was getting way ahead of myself. Sure he was cute. Really, really cute. But he was a dad and no doubt straight. I should have known better. But a little fantasy never hurt.
“You’d know better than me. I only deal with her in small doses,” I admitted.
“And yet it appears you’re as much a victim as I am.”
“True enough.”
I looked away, thankful to still see brake lights in front of me. I thought our conversation was over, until I heard Sam’s voice again.
“So, Wes. Is that Gaga I hear?”
I grinned, turning the music down a bit more.
“Yeah. It was a compromise. I couldn’t take what she put on before.”
“Most likely One Direction. It’s all Maya and Kels talk about,” he said, his eyes sparkling in the sun. My mind wandered again, and it took all my strength to keep my head out of the gutter. It didn’t help matters when Sam licked his bottom lip. Totally not fair.
“Might have been. I’d never heard it before,” I said.
“Lucky you. It’s all I hear at my house.”
The cars in front of me started to move, and I felt disappointment spread through me. Sam nodded in the direction of the traffic.
“You better go. Otherwise the honking will start. Nice meeting you.”
“You too, Sam. Have a good day.”
He flashed his gorgeous smile, and I melted a bit as I eased forward. Kelsey pushed open her door and picked up her bag.
“Later, U Dub.”
“Later,” I said with a grin.
CHAPTER 4
I WIPED the sweat off my forehead before dragging another cardboard box into the driveway. Daniel wasn’t kidding when he said the garage was a mess. It was hard to believe that three people could accumulate so much stuff. Between the basement and the garage, there was a whole house full of junk they clearly never used. I had started out dividing things into piles, but the margins were starting to bleed together, rendering my system useless. Moving the box revealed yet another pair of Rollerblades that once belonged to Kelsey. There were two sparkly pink wheels missing, and they had no laces in them. Why they were still in the garage, I had no idea. I tossed them into the pile to throw away when I heard a voice.
“Wow. That sure is a lot of st
uff.”
I turned around and saw a small woman, her heavily highlighted brown hair perfectly coiffed, her pink sweat suit embellished with sparkly stones. She took off her sunglasses and giggled.
“Yeah, you could say that. My brother likes to keep things,” I said, gesturing to the pile in front of me.
“Oh, so you’re Dan’s brother?” she cooed.
Everyone else in my brother’s life called him Dan, but it still sounded wrong to my ears. He’d always been Daniel growing up, and for me, it just stuck. Strangely enough, I’d never been called Wesley by anyone other than my fifth-grade math teacher, Mrs. Jenkins.
“That’s me. I’m Wes.”
Walking through the junk, I extended my hand to her before I realized it was filthy and pulled it back. We exchanged an awkward laugh, and she smoothed her hair.
“I’m Jocelyn. I live up the street. Our two boys go to the same school as Kelsey.”
“Right. Good.”
It was then that I realized I had absolutely nothing else to say to her. What did I have to talk about with a suburban housewife? I smiled, trying to come up with anything to end the silence. Jocelyn looked past me to the junk and cringed.
“I thought Dan said you lived in the city.”
The last thing I wanted to do was answer a bunch of questions about my life, so I knew I needed to deflect. And lie.
“Oh, I do. I’m here helping him out a bit. I’m a professional organizer, and as you can see, he’s hopeless.”
Her eyes lit up, and she sipped from her tiny water bottle.
“That’s amazing. You know, if you’re available, we could sure use your help at our place. It’s a mess. What do you think?”
I wanted to say no, but looking at her, I came to one conclusion. She was the kind of person who would pay for my services. And since I had no money and no job, I was in no position to be picky. Putting on my professional air, I tried to sound dignified while covered in dirt.
“That would be great. Let me check my schedule and get back to you.”
She laughed and did a little hop.
“Great. Dan and Tina have all our info. I can’t wait to have you tackle my closet. It’s a nightmare.”
“I’m sure it’s not so bad. I’ve seen it all, believe me.”
“I don’t doubt it.”
She glanced at her watch and gasped.
“Oh, I have to go. Hope to hear from you soon, Wes.”
“Bye, Jocelyn.”
She trotted away, leaving me to my mess. After grabbing a drink, I started to make some real progress on Daniel and Tina’s hoard. I was hard at work when I saw a yellow bus pull into the neighborhood, its brakes squealing as it stopped. The door opened and a torrent of kids piled out, including Kelsey and her friend Maya. I could hear them laughing from fifty yards away. As the kids went their separate ways in a cacophony of noise, I dragged two trash bags to the curb.
“Hey, U Dub. How’s it going?” Kelsey said, her eyes on her phone.
“It’s going great, Kels. What does it look like?”
She glanced up for a moment and took me in.
“It looks like you’ve been rolling in dirt.”
“Thanks.”
Maya leaned in and whispered something that sent the two of them into a laughing fit. They headed for the door, paying me no more attention. After working for another hour, I went into the kitchen to get another soda and heard the thump of bass coming from upstairs. It did little to drown out the high-pitched teenage laughter the two of them were generating. Ah, to be young and carefree again. I was rummaging through the cupboards trying to find a snack when Kelsey appeared, sliding across the linoleum floor in her socks.
“Hey,” she said before pulling her phone out of her pocket. I wondered if she could go more than a minute without that thing in her hand. Somehow I doubted it.
“Hey. Where does your dad keep the chips?” I asked, trying to get her attention back.
“In the drawer next to the stove.”
“Thanks, kid.”
I yanked open the drawer and smiled at the fat bag of untouched chips. Tearing into them with abandon, I munched away, letting the crumbs fall on the counter. Nick would have had a heart attack at the sight. Lucky for me, Tina was a lot more tolerant. I stuck my hand back in the chip bag, hungrier than I realized. Kelsey was still standing there in silence. It seemed like she wanted something, but I wasn’t sure what. I finally cracked.
“Why aren’t you upstairs?”
“Maya’s on the phone with her dad. I wanted to give her some privacy.”
“Oh. Cool.”
It took everything I had to not ask about Maya’s dad. His gorgeous eyes came to the front of my mind, and I smiled.
“What’s with the face?” she asked.
“What face?”
“You looked all dopey and, like, silly,” she said before her eyes dropped to her phone screen.
“Why, thank you. That’s exactly what I was going for.”
I rumpled her hair, which made her freak out and run to the mirror hanging in the hall to fix it.
“Don’t mess with the hair, U Dub. It’s the rule around here.”
“Seriously? I must have missed that one. Sorry. Won’t happen again.”
“Make sure it doesn’t.”
I shoved more chips in my mouth and gulped down my soda.
“So, what are you and Maya up to?”
“Nothing. Just hanging out. Her dad works late a lot, so she comes here so she’s not alone.”
So Sam worked late. Interesting. I imagined him behind a desk, doing very important work and looking hot while doing it. I’d gone through a straight-guy phase years before, and while it wasn’t something I wanted to do again, I couldn’t help a stray thought about a hottie like Sam.
“That’s nice. Am I supposed to be making you two do homework or something? You know, acting like a responsible adult?”
“Yeah, right. You, the responsible adult. I think I’d do a better job than you,” she said, pulling her upper lip up and exposing her teeth like she had that morning. It made her look ridiculous and amazing.
She laughed as Maya came down the stairs. Smiling at me, Maya once again whispered to Kelsey, and they busted out laughing. Then they looked at me and I felt self-conscious.
“What, do I have chip crumbs on my face or something?” I asked before making a stupid face.
Kelsey laughed and flipped her hair over her shoulder.
“No. It’s nothing. We’re going back upstairs now.”
“Okay. I’ll be in the garage if you two need anything.”
My momentary concern for their well-being only elicited more laughter, so I shrugged and went back to the garage. By the time I saw Daniel’s car pull onto the street, I was sweeping the remaining dirt from the garage floor. He stopped his Honda and got out, his face once again the picture of surprise.
“Dude! I was only joking. You didn’t have to do this. Especially not in one day. It’s unbelievable,” he said with a smile.
I shrugged, not wanting to make a big deal out of it, even though it was a hell of a lot of work.
“It’s the least I can do. There’s a bunch of stuff I didn’t know what to do with, so it’s lined up along the back wall there in the corner. You could probably donate most of it. I put the junk out by the curb, since, according to your amazingly specific calendar, it’s trash day tomorrow.”
He shook his head and moved to hug me, but I stopped him.
“You don’t want to do that, man. I need another shower in the worst way,” I said, the warning clear in my voice.
“Understood. Maybe some other time, then.”
“Yeah, sure. Save it for later. You don’t want to make it a habit.”
“True enough,” he said before he slapped me on the shoulder.
I followed him inside and collapsed on one of the barstools that lined the kitchen counter. Letting my head fall against the cool top for a moment, I was revived by
the hiss of a can opening. Daniel set the beer down, and I grabbed it and drank a big sip.
“Thanks. I needed that.” The cool liquid was a welcome respite from the dust and dirt.
“You could have had one earlier.”
“I thought I shouldn’t. You know, with Kelsey and her friend being here.”
He stifled a laugh as he swallowed a sip, his eyes wide.
“Wow. How responsible of you.” Daniel shook his head and looked at his watch. “Shit, that reminds me. I have to take Maya home.”
I set my beer down and stood up. Since I was on a roll as a good brother, I decided to take it a step further. I thought it was wise to build up as much goodwill as I could. Lord knew how long Daniel and Tina’s hospitality would last.
“I’ll do it.”
“You don’t have to do that, man.”
“I don’t mind. I mean, you just got here. I’ll take care of it.”
He looked like he was going to protest again, but he stopped himself. He drank another sip of beer and smiled.
“Thanks. I need to start dinner. Tina’s working late tonight.”
“It’s no problem,” I said with a shrug.
As much as I wanted to finish my beer, I knew I had to wait. The girls were standing by the front door, and I grabbed my car keys. This time I let Kelsey rule the radio, and they sang and laughed the whole way to Maya’s house, which wasn’t far away. It was a nice neighborhood, just like Daniel’s, all the houses similar and big. I pulled into the driveway Kelsey told me to and put the car in park.
“Thanks for the ride, U Dub,” Maya said as she opened the door. Clearly, they had taken my new nickname to heart.
“No problem,” I said, smiling.
Kelsey turned around dramatically and sighed.
“Hey, didn’t you say you wanted to give me that thing?” Kelsey said with a lot of enthusiasm.
There was a long pause before Maya laughed, clearing her throat before she responded, her voice suddenly serious.
“Right. That thing. Yes, I did.”
Kelsey looked at me and smiled.
“I’ll be right back, U Dub. Don’t go anywhere.”
“Don’t worry. I won’t.”
They giggled as they ran toward the house. Once they were inside, I changed the radio station to something more palatable. I stared at the houses, which were all really fancy. I wondered what Maya’s dad did for a living. Or maybe it was her mom that brought home the bacon. Or maybe they were a very fashionable suburban power couple. Who knew? The minutes ticked by, and I was getting impatient. I pulled out my phone and texted Kelsey but got no response. And I knew she had her phone. After another five minutes, I got out of the car and walked to the door. I didn’t want to knock, but at the rate we were going, I would be stuck in the car all night. As I pressed the doorbell, I realized that I was still a total mess. The door swung open and Maya’s dad stood there, his face unreadable for a moment before he smiled. He took me in and I cringed.