by Emily Childs
“Why?” I mutter. “He’s just shop—”
Oh, now I see. He’s not shopping alone. Like a fist through my chest, I watch as he smiles and ruffles through the racks with the pretty girl from the fitting rooms. Well, look at that. The two of them, laughing, standing close. Does she know he’ll be traveling with his ex? Oh Mylanta! Is she coming? No. I refused to watch this giggle fest this weekend. My body is on fire with a wash of sick heat.
As I make my move to make an impressive lightning-fast retreat, my already bad luck worsens. Sawyer sees me.
I shouldn’t be surprised. The store isn’t huge and we’re only ten feet away from each other. Still, he’s been so wrapped up in his lady love, I thought I could make a clean break.
“Miss Gardener,” he says, cold and hard.
Raven haired beauty flicks her eyes up, recognition of our brief exchange on her face, then like the man at her side her pale eyes harden. “Gardener? Wait, is this her?”
Sawyer shoves his hands into his jeans that fit too perfectly, and simply nods, jaw muscles pulsing like a heartbeat.
The girl scoffs, and any friendly grins we shared in the fitting room are long over. “Hey, I’ve got something to say to you. Just who do you think you—”
“Let’s go,” Sawyer interrupts, and curls his arm around her shoulders, urging her away. They leave, but not before Sawyer flashes me a lingering glance. A strange expression, one mingled in sorrow and disdain maybe?
But reel back to the woman at his side. Who do I think I am? Who is she? I stare my question at Lily who seems as aghast as me.
“Is it just me, or was that girl going to attack me?” I whisper.
“Fit to kill,” Lily agrees.
My chin quivers, my heart nothing but a puddle. “Who is she? Do you think . . . he’s with her?”
Lily takes note of my breaking voice and has me wrapped in her arms in another second. “Sweetie, I don’t know. Oh, Dot, I’m sorry.”
I sniff and lift my chin. “Nothing to be sorry about. Couldn’t expect the man to stay single the rest of his life.” I bite the inside of my cheek, staring at the place Sawyer had stood. “I don’t know that guy. Not anymore.”
***
I think it might be time to head back to the gym. Tomorrow my body is going to hurt in places I didn’t know it could hurt. Jace’s new place is perfectly adorable. A little one level house with a picket fence. A picket fence.
“Pizza!” Jace calls from her torn-apart kitchen.
It’s like a stampede of overgrown toddlers when Will, Rafe, Zac, and August beeline it for the food. I roll my eyes, snag a slice of plain cheese, before I’m trampled.
“William,” Jace says with a groan. “Five slices? Come on, there’s more people.”
Her brother furrows his brow, cheeks bulging with grease and cheese. “Jace,” he mumbles. “I just lifted your couch inside.”
Nights like this, minus the ache in my biceps, are my favorite. Food, good people, laughing. With three boxes down, and three to go, somehow the conversation drifted to more dreary things—like a pulverized afternoon shopping trip.
“It was weird,” Lily tells them. “I mean, the girl looked like she wanted to eat Dot.”
“I can’t believe we missed it,” Olive whines and rests her head on Rafe’s shoulder.
“Don’t be,” I mutter. “Just another slice to the heart.”
Rafe shifts a little on the couch, picking at a piece of pepperoni. “You sure he’s seeing her?”
“We didn’t exactly have a conversation about his love life in the business casual section, no.”
He grins. “I just talked to him yesterday when he made an appointment for his car—”
“You what!” Olive nearly drops her pizza. “And you didn’t think that is the sort of pillow talk I’d like to know?”
Truth be told, it is the sort of pillow talk I need him to be talking about because quicker than lightning, Ollie will be calling me and spilling it all.
He slings an arm over Olive’s shoulders and squeezes her against his side. “I didn’t want to interrupt the other things we were talking about.”
Olive flushes when August snorts a laugh because he can’t help himself.
I tuck a lock of hair behind my ear, trying to be unbothered. Cool, collected, detached when I ask, “You spoke, huh? And somehow you gathered he, uh, wasn’t seeing anyone?”
Rafe shoots me a sympathetic glance. “Honestly, he found a sly way to ask about how you’re doing. Doesn’t seem like a guy with a new girl would care much.”
My throat burns, it threatens to close. “Did he now?”
Jo huffs and slumps back on the couch. “Well, I still don’t like him.”
“That’s because you didn’t meet him before, babe,” Zac says.
I want to scream because everyone makes that point. Sawyer was amazing, yes, I know. How he used to be is exactly what sucker punches me from behind every time I see the man.
“Are you saying, husband, that you still like him?” Jo lifts an accusatory brow.
With a laugh Zac kisses the side of her head and says, “Yes, wife. That is exactly what I’m saying.” He flicks his eye to me. “Nothing against you, Dot. I’m always on Team Dot, but I’m sorry, I can’t forget that dinner at the Big House. Remember, back when Ollie and Rafe were faking—”
“We remember,” Rafe interrupts. He never likes to bring up the way he and Olive pretended to be lovers before falling in love for real. I think it’s funny, personally.
“Anyway,” Zac goes on. “He was decent then and still is.”
“Except he broke Dot,” Jo says.
“Who says I’m broken? I’m perfectly healed,” I snap.
“I need to meet this guy,” Jace whispers to Olive. “I can’t even form an opinion.”
At that the room laughs again and I could kiss William when he changes the subject to his latest encounter with a future Mrs. Whitney. The man says that about everyone, but is never serious. In truth, I think William Whitney is all talk and rather shy behind all that bravado.
With pizza devoured, boxes unpacked, we stagger outside, tired, full, and smiling. Jace thanks everyone a thousand more times before I finally drive away, too exhausted to even worry about Sawyer Lanford.
Until I drive by the blue palace, the large blue beach house where Sawyer has lived as my street neighbor these long months. Lights are on in the main level. What is he doing? Is she there?
I shake my head. It doesn’t matter. He can do as he pleases and I don’t need to waste another moment wondering a thing about him. I even slap the steering wheel for emphasis to my own thoughts.
At home, I hurry and dress in my most unflattering muumuu nightgown and curl up on the couch with Pride and Prejudice. The six-hour special version. It’s the real deal tonight.
Somewhere between Elizabeth Bennet calling out Mr. Darcy for being a tool at the ball, my thoughts drift to Sawyer. I see him in Darcy, see how words are always left unsaid between the two antagonistic lovers, and my chest squeezes. I know something about that.
The unsent email I’ve kept in my files is like a Pandora’s Box of words I’d wanted to say to Sawyer for so long. Words I’ll never tell him now. A lot of pleading, beseeching really, to know why he basically left me at the altar. Then, I had ended it with the most fervent declaration of love for the man I think I’ve ever managed to conjure.
It’s time to delete it. Time to let go.
I should’ve been focused, should’ve kept my eyes on one screen instead of bobbing between cell and TV.
Because when I looked down again, I see the words. Big, bold, and judgmental: message sent.
Chapter 4
Sawyer
“You’re chipper,” Kyler grumbles, sipping his coffee and glaring at the world.
I snag a banana and protein shake from the fridge. “Good morning to you too, sunshine.”
“He’s chipper, but his face is all pinched.”
I glan
ce up at Maddie. She hands us a plate of sliced apples. I laugh. It’s like we’re twelve again, but I take a large bite of one slice. “I’m concentrating. And where did you go this morning?”
“To the beach. Had to get my head together. I’m sure without being in contact with me, Royce is freaking out and it had me worried.”
I narrow my eyes. “He doesn’t have the number for the phone I got you, right?”
Maddie rolls her bottom lip between her teeth. “He doesn’t. I activated the new one right away and left my old one.”
“Good,” Kyler says.
My face pinches a little more as I whip out my phone with intention.
“What are you looking at?” She comes around the counter to peek at my phone screen since I’ve gone down a rabbit hole and am ignoring everyone. “Holy cow, detective. Are you digging up dirt on him?”
“No,” I say. “But I’m not bad on these things we call computers—” She smacks my shoulder. I grin and show her the amateur hacker job I did on Royce Collins. “I am finding out all kinds of things, though. He’s made a lot of social media posts about you. Looks like Adam commented.”
She balks. “So much for brotherly support. Figures, though. Adam is a lot like Royce.”
Can’t say I disagree. I squeeze her hand. “You’re ready for the backlash, right?”
Maddie’s eyes glisten. “I’m sure everyone will think terrible things about me, and I hate that I’ve brought this—”
“Hey,” Kyler snaps. “No more apologizing for coming here, Maddie. You did the right thing and we’ve got your back.”
She wrings her fingers together, and whispers, “I never thought it’d get so bad. But to have Mama and Daddy . . .”
“We know,” I say. Truth is, I’m angry for her. I thought my aunt and uncle would back their daughter. Kyler, Shane, me, our parents, we all saw Royce for what he could be when we watched him shout at her at their wedding reception three years ago. She’d spilled champagne is all.
After that, I mailed her a second phone in case she ever needed an out. She’d sent me a rather nasty email telling me to butt out, but three years later, I’m glad I sent that phone.
“He’s not going to get to you here,” I tell her. “And we’ll help you with whatever legal work you need.”
Maddie locks her arms around mine and Kyler’s necks, squeezing. “I don’t know what I’d do without you guys. I love you.”
Kyler pats her cheek, then squeezes her against his chest until they’re laughing again.
“Speaking of love,” Maddie says. “You know little miss redhead is probably thinking I’m more than your cousin.” My jaw tightens and Maddie nudges me in the ribs with her elbow. “Don’t be like me, Sawyer, and keep going back to someone who’s not good for you.”
Kyler makes a face, but we’ve all established where he stands on the whole Dot issue. I frown. “I’m not going back to her. Why would I? We’re just going to be working together.”
“Well, good. I wanted to smack her.”
I find it wholly ironic that Maddie became a bear for me, but couldn’t for herself. I suppose that’s the danger of Royce, though. He almost doused her fire with his words and actions. Almost.
“Dot never was that way,” Kyler grumbles. “I just can’t think she’d be so cold.”
I scrub my face, desperate not to go down this hole again. “Ky, I know you guys were close, but for once can you have my back on this?”
I thought he’d argue, but Kyler pinches his mouth, and claps my shoulder. “Yeah, man. Sorry. I know it’s not easy being here and going around her all the time.”
My shoulders slump, but I give him a half smile. “Thank you.”
Maddie takes one of my apple slices and shrugs. “She’s a babe, but still—I wanted to smack her. Next time, you give me the word, and I will.”
“Okay, Rambo.” I clean up the plates as the back door opens and slams a little too loudly.
Liam stalks in confident and already dressed in a suit even though the sun rose an hour earlier.
“Hey,” I say. “What are you doing here so early?” He must’ve left at three in the morning.
“Oh, I was in Charlotte.” He wiggles his brows at me, and I understand.
“With whom? Jannie, or was it Rosie?”
“Erica, actually. But thank you for keeping track of names for me,” he mutters and steals one of my protein shakes from the fridge. “I have a few meetings down here for an investigation thing before we take off tomorrow.”
“Investigation?” I ask. Life insurance could be a different beast than health insurance sometimes.
“Yeah, suspicious circumstances in the demise,” he says nonchalantly. “Sounds like some old lady knocked off her husband.”
“Charming,” Kyler mutters.
“He did have half a million with us,” Liam says as if that sort of thing would be tempting for anyone. “Mind if I crash with you tonight?”
“Might as well. We’re basically a B & B.”
It’s then Liam notices Maddie sipping a cup of smelly herbal tea. “Hey there.” Never mind that I basically called Liam out for sleeping around, he’s confident enough to stroll up to my cousin as if she’s supposed to swoon. “I’m Liam.”
She scoffs, but shakes his hand. “Maddie. Kyler’s and Sawyer’s cousin.”
“They never mentioned they had such a beautiful family.”
“Oh, you’re sweet. Did you say that to Erica, too?”
Kyler laughs until he’s choking, but Liam is entirely unruffled. “No,” he says lightly. “She wasn’t of the same caliber, I guess.”
Maddie rolls her eyes and mutters “please” under her breath.
Liam buttons the center of his jacket and winks at me. “Are you taking the plus one tomorrow or me? Unless Maddie wants to come—”
“No,” she says hurriedly. “No, thank you. Sawyer is putting me to work here and giving me free range of his car. Sounds much more fun.”
“That’s because you haven’t spent an evening with me,” Liam says. How does this guy get women? “It would change your opinion.”
Maddie rolls her eyes. “I bet.”
“I’m getting the oil changed today,” I tell her. “You sure you’ll be good here?”
She slings an arm around Kyler’s shoulders. “We’ll be fine, Dad.”
“Liam,” I say. “You take a plus one. I’ve got enough to worry about.”
“Good,” he says through a chug of the protein shake. “Wait, what are you worrying about?”
“His ex is going along for the ride,” Kyler says. “Should be interesting. I sort of wish I were going.”
Liam’s cocky smile fades. “She’s coming? Why didn’t you say so? Now you’re definitely taking a plus one and I’ll handle her.”
A jolt of blistering heat prickles up the back of my neck. The way Liam uses the word handle makes me want to sock his jaw. I know exactly what he means, and he’s not going anywhere close to Dot. Not that I have a say, but no. Just no.
“I’m good,” I tell him. “We need to get her on board with the deal or we’re out.”
“What?” Liam’s face reddens. “We already signed the agreement. Mr. Gardener can’t do that.”
“He can with that seven-day clause someone insisted on having in the contract.”
Liam curses under his breath. “No one ever uses those.”
“He is unless Dorothy-Ann likes us.”
“What’s the plan then? How are you going to work her over? Branching out into clinics and training and all of that is an awesome way to break into a new market, but don’t take it too far. We all know you wanted to be involved with this clinic. That woman has a grip on you, and you need to make sure she loses it.”
All the scenarios of me convincing Dot to work with us end in disaster—me falling right back where I once was with her. Fight as I might, she still holds the cards when it comes to me and I hate it.
“I’ll figure it out.”
/>
Kyler shoots off his stool. “Sawyer, don’t mess with her.”
I freeze. Rigid and too tight in my own skin. “Always worried about Dot. For once it’d be nice if you had my back.”
Kyler’s face softens. “Believe it or not, I do have your back.”
“At least Liam has the guts to tell it to me straight.”
Kyler rolls his eyes and looks away. He didn’t agree and didn’t like how Liam broke the truth to me, called it dirty and dishonest. Liam doesn’t ruffle, though. His grin says he’s proud more than anything. My brother takes a step closer. “Sawyer, you’re like a guy out for revenge and don’t even know it. Be professional if this contract means so much to you. Do it because it’s good business, not to mess with someone.”
“I know exactly what I’m doing.” He scoffs and drinks his coffee. I narrow my eyes. “Come on, Ky. Tell me what you think, don’t keep it in. Tell my why you pick her over your own brother.”
“Gah,” he groans and throws his arms up. “I’m not picking her over you. What I want is for you to either let her go, or have that conversation you’re so afraid of having.” He hangs his head and lowers his voice. “You handled that mess wrong, Sawyer.”
Maddie starts to back out of the kitchen, her eyes darting between us.
We’re making fools of ourselves, but I can’t stop. “And how would you have handled it, Ky?”
“I know I would’ve confronted her, not given her a bunch of vague reasons for calling things off, that’s for sure. Admit it, you’ve never accused her to her face because part of you isn’t sure you believe it.”
“Hard to deny what you see with your own eyes.” I spin my keys around my finger once. “You saw it too, so again, thanks for the support.”
“Whatever. Have a no-strings attached weekend if you want, in fact I encourage it.” Liam shrugs, unbothered by the brother feud. “But make sure it stays no-strings. That one was trouble for your head, man.”
I don’t want to talk about Dot or that Liam was the one who showed me her true colors. He always told me I was too focused on Dorothy-Ann when we were together—probably the reason he refuses to settle with anyone. We’ve been friends since graduate school and friend is said loosely. He’s smart, knows his stuff, but after years working together, I’m not sure we’d be able to hang socially anymore. We’re too different and we get under each other’s skin.