Blake could have stood there for hours watching the moonlight dance in Tessa’s eyes. She was right though. The boys needed to be at home in bed, and they still had a thirty-minute drive ahead of them. He watched Rob go around the car to hassle his brothers about cleaning the house.
“They’re good kids, Blake.”
He turned back to her. “Of course they are.”
“They are so much better than I deserve.”
“You deserve the best.”
She gave a soft laugh. “I deserve death, yet Jesus gave me life while He died in my place.”
Blake didn’t respond, but his chest tightened at her words. After a moment, he said, “I want to follow you back to Amarillo.”
Tessa shook her head. “You don’t have to, Blake. I’m used to going alone.”
“I know, but there’s no reason for you to.” He caught her hand and brought it to his lips for a quick kiss. “Not as long as I’m here. Would you care if Rob rides with me?”
“No.” Tessa stared at him, her eyes wide. “Not if he wants to.”
Rob appeared behind her. “Sure, I’d like to.”
Tessa nodded. “Okay. I’ll see you at the house.”
All the way home, Blake’s headlights assured Tessa he was there. She couldn’t remember ever feeling so secure on the highway. She didn’t know what to do about Blake. Depending on him could be addictive. Loving him would be so easy. But what of Derek? Could she share her son with his father? If she did, would she lose them both?
Almost two weeks later Rob took the test for his permit and passed. He practically skipped back to the car. “Mom, I have to drive to learn, so you’re going to let me now, aren’t you?”
Tessa handed over her car keys with a prayer in her heart. “I guess we can be thankful we have an automatic transmission. I learned on a five-speed. Talk about being a real jerk.”
Rob laughed. “Cute, Mom.”
They were halfway home when Rob turned the wrong way.
“Hey, have you forgotten where we live? And you were doing so well.”
“Thanks.” Rob’s face beamed with pleasure at her praise. “I’m going to Blake’s.”
The blood drained from Tessa’s face. “You mean his mom’s house?”
“No, his new restaurant. What’s wrong? You look like you saw a ghost.”
“I’m fine.” Relief that she wouldn’t be facing Blake’s mother made Tessa weak. How silly to be so scared of a mere woman.
Rob turned into the parking lot of Blake’s future restaurant and stopped near the building. Tessa sighed. “You go on in. I’ll wait here.”
While Rob went into the old brick building, Tessa leaned against the seat and closed her eyes. She didn’t know why she dreaded seeing Blake’s mother. They’d lived in the same town for years but had never crossed paths other than at a distance. Mrs. Donovan would never recognize her anyway, but she didn’t want to take the chance. She’d never forgotten how she had called her names and ordered her to leave that day eleven years ago.
“Wow! So you passed the first time.” Blake’s voice drifted to the car. “I’m proud of you, Rob, for doing so well on the test but mostly for helping your mom out. I hope that doesn’t stop now.”
“Nah,” Rob said. “I kinda like cooking.”
“Maybe when you’re older, you can go to work for me.” Blake leaned against the open car window and looked inside. “Tessa, why don’t you come in and see what I’m doing?”
“Yeah, Mom, it’s pretty neat.”
Tessa couldn’t think of a good excuse not to, so she got out of the car. Blake took her hand and didn’t let go even after they were inside. He pointed out the new wall he’d just finished that separated the kitchen from the large dining room.
Blake had started painting a dark blue on the walls of a smaller room he said would be the arcade. He talked about the games he would install and then showed them the video section.
“I’ll build a wall here to separate these two areas from the dining room. What do you think?”
“Looks like you’ve got a good start.” Tessa realized he was far from finished.
“Yeah.” Blake turned back to the dining room. “This will be my biggest draw. There isn’t enough room here for bumper cars, but I plan to put in a bar against that wall. I should be able to squeeze in a small dance floor to the side of it. I’ll be keeping some late hours, but it should be worth it.”
Tessa stared at the empty wall, visualized a bar with alcohol flowing free, and shuddered. She had been held in the grip of hard liquor long enough to know she wanted no part of a bar. If Blake served alcohol, she would not allow her boys to come near the place. How could she tell him so he would understand?
Finally she said, “I don’t know, Blake. I think you need to make this family oriented so everyone will feel welcome. You’re missing a large group of people otherwise.”
“Of course.” Blake glanced toward his planned arcade. “It will be. You’d be surprised how many kids will make this a regular hangout. Families, too. I don’t think you need to worry about the customers. They’ll show up.”
But her boys wouldn’t. Even if they wanted to, she wouldn’t let them. If she hadn’t already known, seeing what Blake had in mind for his restaurant would have told her their values were too different for more than casual friendship. She turned toward the door with a heavy heart. She would have to keep her distance from Blake. Her heart broke at the thought.
Chapter 8
T essa snapped the lid back on the empty flour canister. Rob had been cooking again. She needed to take cookies to the singles’ Bible study tomorrow night, and Rob had used her ingredients for the cookies he and his brothers ate up as fast as he pulled them from the oven. A smile tugged at her mouth. This was Blake’s fault. Encouraging her son to cook. Who would have guessed Rob could learn so quickly and love it as much as he obviously did?
An unexpected thought entered her mind, and she leaned against the kitchen counter for support. Could Rob’s sudden interest in cooking be a bid for attention from the only man she had allowed into their lives since he was a small child? Regret twisted her insides. She understood God’s plan for families now in a way she had not considered when Robbie was born. Back then her only goal was obtaining acceptance and what she thought was love. Truthfully, she had found neither until she found Christ.
She closed her eyes as she visualized the loving arms of her Savior and whispered a prayer. “I’m so sorry, Father. Will the damage to my boys ever be repaired? Thank You for Your forgiveness and love. And thank You so much for Rob, Seth, and Derek. They are each a wonderful gift I don’t deserve. Heal their emotions and give them the stability in You that they need. Amen.”
Tessa bowed her head and waited quietly as she brought her troubled thoughts under control. Then she shoved away from the counter and crossed the kitchen floor.
“I’m going to the store.” Tessa walked through the living room to get her purse and keys from her bedroom. “Someone used up all the flour.”
“Oh, sorry, Mom.” Rob turned from the movie all three boys were watching. “I’ll go with you if you’ll let me drive.”
“I don’t know, Rob.” Tessa couldn’t resist teasing him. “I’d hate to take you away from your movie.”
Seth turned off the set. “We can stop here and watch the rest when we get back.”
“You don’t have to go, too.” Rob frowned at his little brothers.
Seth just shrugged, but Derek ran for the door and called over his shoulder, “We gotta go. We got a bet going on how soon you get a ticket.”
“Derek!” Tessa knew she shouldn’t be shocked at anything the boys said, but just when she thought she’d heard it all, they came up with something even more outrageous.
“You’ll have a ticket before I get one,” Rob yelled at the slamming door as Derek disappeared outside. “The little brat.”
Tessa couldn’t stop the quick laugh that escaped. She shook her head. “Set
h, I can’t believe you would place bets with your little brother. You know better than that.”
Seth shrugged before going outside. “We aren’t betting anything, Mom, so it isn’t gambling.”
“I still think it’s lousy for my brothers to want me to get a ticket,” Rob grumbled.
Tessa led the way outside. “Oh, they’re just kids, Rob. You know they don’t really want anything bad to happen.”
Rob took the keys and completely ignored his brothers as he drove to the store without incident. When they returned home, he parked the car in the driveway just as another car stopped in front. A teenager got out and came around to meet Tessa at the back of her car. He handed her an envelope.
“What’s this?” She looked at the paper but didn’t take it.
“A guy named Blake Donovan asked me to deliver it to you.” The boy pushed it closer. “I don’t think it’s anything bad. He said to wait for an answer.”
“Really?” Intrigued now, Tessa took the envelope and tore it open. The boys crowded around as she pulled out a single sheet of paper and unfolded it. She read it silently first and then with a smile read it to the boys.
“It says, ‘Tessa, would you go to the movies with me Saturday evening? Your choice. Dinner, too.’ ”
Obviously Blake had in mind an evening out for just the two of them. Tessa started to wad the paper up but thought better of it. She looked at the messenger and asked, “Do you have a pen I could borrow?”
“Sure.” He took one from his shirt pocket and handed it to her with a grin. “Mr. Donovan made sure of that.”
“How thoughtful.”
“What are you going to tell him, Mom?” Rob asked.
She looked around the circle of her sons and said, “That depends on you guys. Would you like to go out for dinner and a movie with Blake?”
“Yeah.” Derek jumped in place to show his approval.
Seth nodded while Rob smirked.
Tessa laughed. “So we all agree we’d like to go?”
“Sure, Mom,” Rob answered for them all. “We want to go, but Blake is only expecting you.”
Tessa wrote, “Yes, thank you,” on the paper, folded it, and replaced it in the envelope. She handed it to the messenger. “Here you go.”
As the young man ran to his car and drove off, Tessa smiled at her boys. “Looks like we’re going to the movies with Seth and Derek’s coach on Saturday night.”
The two younger boys ran to the house with the key and a bag of groceries each while Rob fell into step with his mother. “Mom, you know Blake doesn’t want us along.”
She laughed. “You’ve got to agree he invited ‘you,’ and as far as I know that word is just as plural as it is singular. The note did not say you boys were not invited, so I can only assume he meant all four of us.”
Rob laughed with her and muttered, “Man, is he gonna get a surprise on Saturday.”
Tessa agreed. Maybe she shouldn’t go. Maybe she should just cut all connections with Blake. But her conscience continually reminded her she hadn’t given him a chance to explain what he planned to serve from his bar. She had assumed the worst, and at the very least, she should hear what he had to say.
Blake pulled to a stop in Tessa’s driveway at six thirty on Saturday evening. He got out of the car and started toward the house when the front door flew open and two boys ran out.
“Hey guys, how are you doing?” he called to them as they ran past him.
“Great,” Seth answered but didn’t stop. Derek followed his brother without speaking.
Blake took a few more steps toward the front porch and stopped when the door opened again and Rob came out.
“Hi, Blake.” Rob gave him a sort of goofy grin and walked past. “Mom will be along shortly,” he called over his shoulder.
Blake started again for the house. The boys must be going someplace since their mom had a date. He heard a car door slam and turned to see who was picking them up. Three boys leaned out his back window with huge grins on their faces. He took a hesitant step toward them. “Hey, what are you doing?”
“Is there a problem?” Tessa stood on her front porch smiling. She ran toward him and linked her arm through his. “Blake, thanks for inviting us. The boys so seldom get to do anything like this that it’s a real treat to them. And me, too.”
She wore a pair of tan dress slacks and a pink knit top with a pink ribbon holding her hair back from her face. She carried a matching tan jacket and a clutch purse. She had never looked prettier. Or so clean and wholesome. Love for her welled in his heart, and he almost forgot the boys. Just knowing she had agreed to go with him was enough. He didn’t mind if the boys went along.
He grinned. “So you decided to pull a fast one on me, huh?”
She laughed. “Do you care?”
He shook his head as he took her hand. “Nope. With three boys on my side, I should get to watch an action movie. Where do you want to eat? That will be your choice.”
Tessa picked the restaurant, and the boys picked the movie with Tessa’s approval. Blake relaxed and enjoyed the evening more than he expected. He joked with Rob and talked baseball with Derek. Then, after the movie, he got into a discussion on space travel with Seth and learned things he didn’t want to admit he hadn’t known. He watched Tessa interact with her boys and wondered why he had run from her in the first place. He’d wasted far too many years without her and the boys. He didn’t want to waste another minute. Starting right now, he vowed to win Tessa’s heart.
“That’s it, boys,” the coach called out. “Form a congrats line, and we’ll see you Thursday night.”
Tessa watched Seth and Derek join one of two quickly forming lines. The boys jogged forward slapping their teammates’ upraised hands until they reached the end of the line. Seth finished first and joined his mom outside the fence. Derek followed close behind.
“So what are we doing tonight?”
Tessa’s heart picked up speed at the deep voice that was becoming so familiar. Blake stood just behind her.
She turned, forcing a smile. Each time she saw Blake, he became harder to resist, and they’d never got around to talking about his bar, so she couldn’t justify telling him to get lost. “I have no idea what you are doing, but the boys and I are going to the mall. Derek needs a pair of jeans that will cover his ankles. Seth has been borrowing Rob’s socks, and Rob needs—”
“Mom.” Rob quickly crossed the ground to join them. “Let’s not air our dirty laundry, as Grandma always says.”
Tessa hid her smile behind her hand while Blake chuckled. Her oldest son now sported a red neck.
“In that case,” Blake said, “I think I’ll follow you to the mall. Why don’t you ride with me? I can drop you back by here to pick up your car when we finish.”
Although she tried to object, Tessa gave up when no one paid attention over the boys’ enthusiastic pleading for her to agree. She looked into Blake’s smiling eyes and nodded.
On the short ride to the mall, Tessa had the strangest feeling of family. Normal family, to be exact. Mom, Dad, and three sons. Her heart thudded because she liked the feeling. How easy it would be to relax and let Blake help raise her three active boys. She would gladly share the worry and fear that often crept into their daily lives. Concerns she expected would grow even more as the younger boys entered their teens. But Blake didn’t trust in God. How could he teach his son to serve the Lord when he didn’t believe his own salvation was important?
Blake brought his car to a stop in the mall parking lot and shut off the engine. Before Tessa had her seat belt unbuckled, the boys tumbled from the backseat.
“Mom, are you coming?” Derek pulled her door open.
“Of course.” She jumped from the car and grabbed him in a quick hug. “If I don’t, how are you going to get those new jeans?”
He gave her waist a squeeze and grinned up at her. “I know, Mom. Why do you think I opened the door for you?”
“Oh you.” She laughed as he r
an to catch his brothers.
Blake fell into step with her. “You’ve done a great job with those boys, you know.”
She gave him a quick look and saw his serious expression before letting her gaze return to her sons. “I can’t take much credit. I lost them, Blake. Derek was only two months old when they were all taken away from me. It took two years before I got them back.”
“I’m sorry, Tess.” His arm slipped around her shoulders. He didn’t pull her closer. She wished he would.
“I hit rock bottom. Remind me to tell you about it sometime.” She smiled through the pain of that time and said, “Let’s go shopping now. The boys are going to get away if we don’t catch them.”
In the department store, they headed toward the boys’ clothing section. Rob and Blake left the others looking at blue jeans for Derek while they picked out underwear and socks. They filled the cart with the purchases they needed and then wandered around the store just looking at things.
In the electronics section, Rob stopped to look at movies. Blake picked one up and glanced at it before putting it back. “I can get you pretty much anything you want for wholesale price.”
“Really?” Rob’s eyes lit up.
“Yep. Just come by my place sometime, and I’ll show you the catalogs.” He turned toward Tessa and added, “With your mom’s permission of course.”
She still wasn’t sure she wanted her boys near Blake’s place. She shrugged. “I don’t know, guys. We’ll see.”
Seth and Derek headed toward sporting goods, and the others followed. When Derek picked up a baseball mitt, tried it on, then looked up with pleading eyes, Tessa knew she had a problem.
“Please, Mom.” He smacked his fist into the glove. “I gotta use Rob’s old glove and it’s not as good as this one. I bet I could catch all the balls with this.”
“Not this time, Derek.” Tessa hated to say no, but she really didn’t have the extra cash for ball gloves. School would be starting before long, and the boys all needed new clothes as well as school supplies.
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