Darlene left the door open as she entered her office. Sarah followed her inside and waited while she picked up an envelope and pulled the letter out. She opened the folded paper and handed it to Sarah.
“This came in today’s mail.” She shook her head. “After all these years in this place, I can’t believe someone would buy it out from under us.”
Sarah read the letter, which appeared to be a standard impersonal notice of eviction giving Marilee’s Home ninety days to find a new location. A construction company had purchased the entire block and would be building a mini mall. She started to refold the letter when the signature at the bottom caught her eye, and she looked closer. Sprawled below the closing, in barely decipherable letters, Sarah saw the name that had haunted her for eighteen years. Kevin Nichols.
Blood drained from her face as her heart refused to pump.
“Sarah, what’s wrong?”
Darlene’s worried voice startled her, and she looked up. She’d been staring at Kevin’s name as if he’d materialized in the room. She still didn’t know why he’d been invited to meet Trey, and she had no idea what business he had tearing down Marilee’s Home. Did he know how much it meant to her? He’d already ruined her life once. Why, after all these years of silence, had he shown up to torment her?
“I’m sorry,” she told her friend. “It’s just the signature. Unfortunately, the letter seems to be official. I don’t know if there’s anything we can do, just as you said, other than look for another building.”
“What about the signature?” Harold spoke from the open doorway. “Why would a signature make you look as if you’ve seen a ghost?”
Sarah handed the letter to him.
He looked at the bottom of the page and then at her. “So, your nemesis strikes again.”
“I don’t understand.” Darlene frowned. “What’re you two talking about?”
“Kevin Nichols.” Sarah took the letter from Harold and handed it back to Darlene. “He signed this, so I assume it’s his company who has purchased this block of buildings to tear down.”
“You didn’t know he was in construction?” Harold asked.
She shook her head. “No, I haven’t kept track of him.”
“Wait a minute.” Darlene looked from one to the other. “Are you telling me you know this Kevin Nichols? Sarah, if you know him, maybe you could talk to him. Maybe you could get him to leave our building alone. What do you think? Could you do that for these girls?”
Sarah turned from the pleading in Darlene’s eyes to the bland expression on Harold’s face. Could she? Could she face Kevin again so soon? In the distance she heard the chatter of girls’ voices and remembered how alone and frightened she’d felt when she learned she was pregnant. Fear had grown with the uncertainty in her life and all the changes her body and emotions went through. These girls didn’t need to have their home ripped from them along with everything else they faced.
With a heartfelt sigh, she nodded. “Yes, I know Kevin. I’ll contact him as soon as possible and see what I can do.”
Chapter 4
I need a phone number.” Sarah paused by Tricia’s desk long enough to add, “For Kevin Nichols here in the city. He may be in construction, maybe a contractor, so you might look in business listings, too.”
“I’ll do my best.” Tricia twisted her chair around to reach the table behind her. She lifted the Chicago phone book and plopped it on her desk. “Might as well start in here. Assuming you haven’t already tried this?”
Sarah made a face at Tricia’s saucy grin. “Of course not. I just found out at lunch that I need it. The guy is trying to throw our girls out on the street. The least I can do is give him an earful. The most is stop him in his tracks.”
Tricia laughed as she flipped open the directory. “Go get ’em, tiger. Give me a few minutes, and I’ll get that number for you.”
Sarah went into her office and closed the door in case she decided to release some tension with a scream. If only she had the nerve. How could Kevin do this to her? Why would he pick on girls who couldn’t fight back? Girls who in spite of the wrong they had done, or maybe because of it, needed understanding and help rather than rejection.
She sat down at her desk and tried to concentrate on her work, but her mind continually drifted back to Kevin. To the man she had seen Saturday, when in her mind, she had yet to give up the image of the boy he had been.
“Sarah.” Tricia’s voice came over the intercom.
“Yes.”
“I found some numbers. Shall I bring them in now?”
“Sure.” Sarah glanced at the clock. “No, don’t bother. I don’t have time. I’ll pick them up when I get back from upstairs.”
“All right. I’ll have them for you,” Tricia promised.
When Sarah returned to the office late that afternoon, Tricia stood and walked around her cleared desk. “I laid the phone number on your desk. Well actually, I found three Kevin Nichols that might include the one you want. I hope one is right, but no guarantee.”
“Okay, thanks.” Sarah tried to focus on Tricia rather than the meeting she’d just left. “Are you leaving?”
“Yeah.” Tricia grimaced. “Doctor’s appointment. Yearly physical.”
“Oh yes.” Sarah nodded. “You mentioned that this morning. Seems like a month of Sundays has passed since then.”
Tricia smiled. “I know what you mean. How’d your lunch with Dr. Jenson go?”
Sarah laughed. “You’ve been spying out the window again!”
Tricia waggled her eyebrows. “Natch, it’s what I do best around here. I adjusted the blind and saw you drive off together. Does that mean you’ve stopped running from him?”
A long sigh from Sarah spoke for her. She stopped in the doorway to her office. “Not really. Maybe if I stopped running, he would stop chasing. Do you think it’s worth a try?”
“Only if you want to get caught.” Tricia headed toward the outside door. “While most men may be in the running for the chase, I don’t think your doctor is. He’s really a great guy, and he’s looking for wife number two, you know. Maybe you should stop running. Marriage isn’t that bad.”
Without waiting for Sarah’s response, she slipped out the door. Sarah stared at the spot where Tricia had stood and let her parting words replay in her mind. Should she take Harold seriously? Did she want to be anyone’s second wife?
She gave a sharp laugh. Did she even want to be anyone’s first wife? Harold had never asked her to marry him, but he’d dropped enough hints. She was thirty-five. Almost everyone else she knew was married or had been. Most long before her age.
So why didn’t she marry Harold? Tricia was right. Even if she tried, she couldn’t put her finger on any one thing wrong with Harold. He was kind, considerate, generous, mannerly. Nothing was wrong with Harold. Except that she didn’t love him.
As a friend, he was wonderful. As an escort, there was none better. As a husband, he would be comfortable. And comfortable made good shoes, not men.
She picked the note up from her desk and looked at Tricia’s neat handwriting. The name Kevin Nichols jumped off the page at her. The room seemed to shrink so there was room for only her, the paper in her hand, and her memories.
She heard the football players calling to each other as practice broke up that day so long ago. Kevin ran across the field toward her. He lifted his helmet and tucked it under his arm. She saw his dark sweat-soaked hair and dirt-streaked face with the welcoming dimples just for her and wondered how she had caught the attention of the most popular boy in school. She loved him so much.
Her hand jerked as a splash hit the note and spread, soaking into a damp circle. She sank into her chair, letting the paper fall to the desk while she covered her face with her hands and wiped the moisture away. The wound in her heart that she thought was long healed now gaped with raw edges. Kevin had done this to her. By showing up at her meeting with Trey and by forcing his way into her life at the home, he brought memories to t
he surface better left forgotten. If only she hadn’t seen him, hadn’t felt his hand on her arm. If only she didn’t have to deal with him now.
She stood, leaning her hip against her desk for support while she got her purse, took her keys out, and stuffed the paper inside. She’d call Kevin from the privacy of her own home. Tricia’s note said she only found residential numbers, so it might be late before she could reach him anyway. Right now, she just wanted to go home.
By the time Sarah parked in her garage and entered the kitchen, she felt numb. She walked through the house until she reached the front door. She unlocked it and stepped outside to retrieve her mail. She flipped through the normal junk mail and circulars, glad there was nothing she needed to concentrate on. Tossing the entire bundle in the trash, she turned left into her living room and sank into the cream-colored sofa, kicking her shoes off as she did.
With her bare feet tucked under her, she curled into herself and rested her elbows on her knees with her head held in her hands. Images of Trey and Kevin flashed through her mind faster than she could follow. She thought of Trey as an infant and as she’d seen him each year in his pictures. She saw him in her mind again at the mall, looking so much like Kevin.
Then there was Kevin at seventeen, holding her hand while they walked to class. Kevin on the football field running with the ball or stealing glances at her when she cheered with the other cheerleaders. Kevin holding her close in the front seat of his car, making promises he didn’t keep. Once he’d been hers. Now he could be married for all she knew.
She squeezed her eyes tight against the tears that tried to escape. She didn’t want to think of Kevin with another woman. She lifted her head and stood with a sound of disgust. What difference would it make to her if he had a wife and a dozen kids? He could do anything he wanted. She didn’t care.
She wouldn’t cry over the spilt milk of their past either. With the phone in one hand and the paper with the phone numbers in the other, she took a deep breath and dialed the first on the list. A woman answered.
By sheer force of will, Sarah did not hang up the phone. She stuttered. “M–Mrs. Nichols?”
“Yes?”
An invisible band squeezed her chest. “This is Miss Maddox with Marilee’s Home for girls. I need to speak to Kevin Nichols. Is he home?”
“Ma’am?” The woman’s voice faltered. “Are you sure you have the correct number? My husband was Kevin Nichols, but he never had anything to do with any girls’ home that I knew of.”
Sarah lifted her head and stared at a bouquet of artificial daisies in the center of her table without actually seeing them. “Did you say ‘was’?”
“Yes, my husband passed away almost two years ago.”
“Oh ma’am, I’m truly sorry.” She couldn’t keep the lilt from her voice as air rushed back into her lungs. “I do have the wrong number. I’m sorry.”
The next number rang four times until an answering machine picked up. She recognized the voice immediately. “Hi, Kevin here. If you’re selling something, you’re wasting your time. If you want me to call you back, leave a message at the beep. If not, hang up and I won’t bother.”
Her heart pounded. She’d found him and lost her voice at the sound of his. His answering machine beeped and she jumped. “Kevin, this is Sarah.”
Her mind went blank. Why had she called Kevin? Oh yes, the home. He wanted to tear down the home.
“I need to talk to you about Marilee’s Home—”
“Sarah? What’s this about Marilee? In fact, who is Marilee?”
“Marilee’s Home. Surely you know the name of the home you’re planning to tear down.” Annoyance at him strengthened her voice.
He chuckled. “This is Sarah Maddox, isn’t it?”
“Of course.” How many Sarahs did he know? Sarah tapped her fingernail. “But what about Marilee’s Home?”
“I don’t know. You tell me.” Now he sounded annoyed. “I don’t know anyone named Marilee, and I don’t make a habit of tearing down people’s homes, anyway. Why are you calling me about this Marilee?”
Sarah took a deep breath. So much for getting off on the right foot. She should have had Tricia call him. She squeezed the bridge of her nose.
“Marilee’s Home is a home for girls who have no other place to go. At present there are six girls living there, and most of them are pregnant. One has a tiny baby. You signed a letter telling the director you would be tearing their home down to make way for a mini mall. I read the letter today. I saw and recognized your signature.”
As soon as the words crossed her lips, she knew she shouldn’t have admitted recognizing his signature. Why would she after eighteen years? With Kevin’s ego, he would think she’d pined her heart away for him through each of those years. And she hadn’t. Certainly not after the first year. By then she was totally over him. More or less.
“I see.”
She waited. Five seconds later, she’d waited long enough. “What does that mean? ‘I see.’ Will you call off the bulldozers now? You can’t be so heartless to shove those girls out into the street.”
“I don’t know, Sarah. I need more information. I’ve never liked making important decisions over the phone. Why don’t we meet somewhere? We need to discuss this. This is not something that can be fixed in five minutes. Have you eaten? We could talk over dinner. My treat.”
Sarah’s heart pounded so hard she could feel the pulse throughout her body. Just the thought of being close to Kevin again terrified her.
“No.”
In the silence on her phone, she spoke in a calmer voice. “I can’t do that, Kevin. Just do something about the girls’ home. Please don’t push these girls out of the only home they have right now. You don’t know what it’s like to be pregnant and too young to make it on your own.”
Before he could argue, she turned the phone off and let it fall to the table. She clasped her hands together to keep them from trembling.
Kevin awoke on Sunday morning with Sarah on his mind, just as she had been for the past week. Seeing her at the mall, held close in the arms of their tall, young son, had stirred something in his heart. He should have known not to show up early. But he’d been eager to meet the son he’d rejected before he understood what he was giving up.
He didn’t regret Sarah’s decision to give Trey up for adoption though. How could he? Trey had obviously had a better life with the Millers than he would have had with a couple of teenagers. He and Sarah hadn’t been ready to take on the responsibilities of marriage, let alone parenthood. And he knew now abortion had never really been an option.
Kevin stared at the ceiling and saw Sarah at sixteen. She was so beautiful, and she was his. His dad had cursed when he’d told his parents about the baby. They both said an abortion would be for the best.
That had been his first thought, too, but then he’d seen how the idea hurt Sarah, and he’d changed his mind.
“Sarah won’t,” he’d said.
“Then let her worry about it.”
“We could get married. I’ve got a part-time job. The baby’s not due until March. If you’d help us, we’d make it until I graduate in May, and then I can go full time. I love her, and she loves me.”
His dad used another choice word. “As if you snot-nosed kids know what love is.”
His mother finally spoke her mind. “Kevin, you are not marrying that girl. I’m sorry for what’s happened, but it really isn’t your problem. If Sarah chooses to have her baby, then she’ll have to take responsibility. This is your last year of high school. Make the most of it. You’ve got a future, college, and then a real job to look forward to. Afterward, you’ll find a nice girl to marry, and you’ll be glad you listened to us. For now, I want you to stay away from Sarah. She’ll just drag you down. Girls like that usually do.”
They talked as if Sarah was totally at fault. Kevin tried arguing at first, but they hadn’t listened. The worst was when they refused to help, threatening to cut him off completely if he conti
nued seeing Sarah. He knew he couldn’t take care of a wife and baby on twenty hours a week at minimum wage, so he backed off and let Sarah think he didn’t care. After his offer to pay for an abortion, she wasn’t hard to convince. Her love turned to hate, and although he never forgot her, he walked away and never looked back.
Until a week ago when he saw the woman she’d become.
He laced his fingers behind his head and stared at the ceiling in his bedroom. Was she married? If only he could get Sarah to meet with him, he’d find out. Maybe he could apologize for the past. Maybe he could tell her he hadn’t known back then that abortion meant taking an actual life.
When he was seventeen, the baby hadn’t seemed real. He hadn’t thought beyond getting rid of the pregnancy. Sarah’s pregnancy became his enemy. Until he saw Trey in the hospital nursery the day he was born, he hadn’t understood he and Sarah had a son. He was so thankful Sarah had enough courage and foresight to let their son live. When she sent word asking him to sign the adoption papers, he gladly gave up his parental rights so his son could have a decent life. Now he wanted to see Sarah again, and he was pretty sure he knew where to find her on Sunday morning.
He dressed in navy blue slacks and a pale blue striped button-up shirt then tied a navy tie around his neck and slipped into dress socks and shoes. A quick bagel and glass of milk became his breakfast before he headed out the door.
The door almost clicked shut before Kevin shoved it open again. He crossed the living room to a small lamp table against the opposite wall and snatched up the Bible Trey had given him. With it held securely in his hand he left the apartment.
Kevin had no intention of trying to start things up with Sarah. Still, a couple of days ago, curiosity had made him find her address. Just to see how she was doing. He’d looked at her street on Google maps. She lived in a nice area, although he wasn’t sure which house was hers.
This morning he found her street number on a two-story brick house that told him she was doing quite well. Okay, so maybe she was married. Or maybe she had a good job and was deep in debt.
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