by Sherry Soule
I step back and his hands slide from my arms. “Yeah, but I don’t want to keep fighting, okay? And I still need to sort some stuff out.”
Silence descends. A flicker of orange and red flames dances over our faces from the bonfire. I take a deep breath and remind myself that Hayden’s been keeping secrets from me and telling me partial truths. So I’m not sure if I can ever trust him again…
Yet when I close my eyes, all I see is his face. His ridiculously sexy crooked smile. Those mismatched eyes. The way he holds me, kisses me. Hayden’s hands on my skin, his fingers in my hair. And while Hayden’s certainly a fine specimen of male flesh, he’s not just easy on the eyes, he is also charming, loyal, and kindhearted.
Trusting Hayden is a decision I make knowing that there aren’t any solid guarantees. Trust is not about giving it to a perfect, honest person, but it’s working through the bad times when they arise as a team and finding ways to have faith in the other person’s integrity. I know that ultimately Hayden’s intentions and motives were to save me more pain, so learning to trust him again and forgiving him for lying to me means becoming more confident that things will work out how I want them to—or even better. And after everything we’ve been through together, he deserves a second chance.
In that instant, I realize that while I want to hate Hayden, I know I can’t…
“Full disclosure? No more secrets?” I ask.
“You know everything now. Everything that matters.”
“I’m gonna hold you to that, but I’m not sure about being your girlfriend again.”
Hayden gently takes my face in his hands and lowers his head. His lips touch mine in a light kiss. His hands tremble slightly as he holds my cheeks. “Well, I’m just glad I finally have you in my life.” He grabs me by the upper arms and yanks me closer, wrapping me in his snug embrace. “I never want to let you go…you undo me, Sloane, body and soul, I’m yours…”
He lowers his head, kissing me deeply, as if I’m the air he needs to breathe. My blood soars as I slip my arms around his neck. My brain clicks off and my fingers dig into his shirt. It’s the hottest, deepest, most passionate kiss we’ve ever shared. I can barely catch my breath.
Well, that’s one way to close the proverbial gap between us.
Finally, Hayden breaks away, but he presses his forehead to mine. Our noses rub and his breath feels quick and warm against my cheeks. I think I like his method of making up after a fight.
Hayden straightens to his full height. “Don’t want to be my girlfriend? I think that kiss tells a much different story.” A muscle spasms in his jaw. “Look, I’m…I’m sorry for how I’ve treated you, Sloane. You’re much more than obligation to me, and seeing you with Saxton made go a little crazy.”
“Like crazy jealous?” I ask, trying not to smile as I gaze up at him.
“I still don’t trust him. Everything about him is too convenient.” Hayden scratches the stubble on his chin. “Can I take you home now?”
“Yeah. Suddenly, I’m no longer feeling like a party animal.” He takes my hand and we start walking toward the parking lot. “And just so you know, I’ll be keeping a pair of dull scissors in my purse. One more lie and it’s” —with my free hand, I make a scissor cutting motion with my fingers— “snip, snip.”
He smiles. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
He leads me through the brisk night air and past the partygoers to his SUV parked in the turnabout with the other cars. Slipping his hand into his pocket, then pulling it back out, Hayden unlocks the Range Rover with the remote.
“Wait.” I slide my hand from his and stop near the SUV. “What if the reapers are around, and they smell the residue on Saxton? He’s an arrogant jerk, but I don’t want him to get hurt.”
Hayden opens the passenger door. “I’ll text Zach to keep an eye on him tonight. It’s a light mark, so it should fade within a few hours.”
I get into the vehicle and fasten my seatbelt. Hayden walks around the SUV, texting on his phone. He climbs into the driver’s seat, placing the key into the ignition and starts the engine.
Hayden pulls out onto the road, and clears his throat. “Sloane…”
An enormous streak of green bolts across the road, causing Hayden to stomp on the brakes. The mutant skids to a stop right in front of the SUV, issuing a deafening growl. The vehicle slews and shakes as it comes to a tire-burning halt. His fingers tighten on the steering wheel.
Beside me, Hayden sits stiffly, breathing hard and uneven. I squint through the windshield, my jaw clenching. The reapers are back.
The giant mutant advances, tongue panting and large fangs gleaming under the streetlights. Inhuman black eyes meet mine through the dirty glass.
“Go!” I yell. “Run the damn thing over.”
Hayden shifts into drive and slams his foot on the accelerator. The SUV lurches forward, and our heads whip back against the headrests. The reaper doesn’t move.
The damn thing wants to play chicken, as if it has no sense of fear. Maybe the lab bred that emotion out of them. I brace my hands on the dashboard and close my eyes, ready for impact while I pray the reaper doesn’t topple the car over…
I peel open one eye. Hayden jerks on the wheel at the last second, and we rocket past the reaper at eighty miles an hour. I glance into the side-mirror at an empty street. Nothing pursues the speeding vehicle. We race through the next three intersections before Hayden decelerates.
He glances over at me. “Are you okay?”
I nod, staring at the road. “Yeah, but you’d better pull over and warn Zach that a reaper might be on its way to the party.”
THIRTY-THREE
Hayden insists that I spend the night in the cottage on his family’s estate just in case the reapers are still hunting me. I don’t argue because I’m much safer being with him until the new layer of residue fades from my skin. After I call my mom and tell her that I’m staying the night with Viola, Hayden drives us across town.
I hate lying to my mom right after I’ve lectured Hayden on telling the truth, but I can’t go home if it might endanger the lives of my family.
At a red light, he glances over at me. “If you’re not too tired, we can finish talking. Or whatever else…” His voice dips low with suggestion and promise.
Butterflies flutter wildly in my stomach. “Okay, yeah,” I say. “We do have a lot to talk about.”
He pulls onto the long driveway, parks on the side of the cottage, and we get out of the SUV. The charming guesthouse has white clapboard shutters and the exterior is swathed by clinging ivy. A canopied swing rocks on the porch and the sweet aroma of wild roses growing through the hawthorn hedge wafts in the spring air.
“Sloane,” he whispers, stopping near the door. “I just want to forget all the time we’ve spent apart and the arguing. I know I can be a hardheaded jackass sometimes.” He kisses my cheek.
Part of me is desperate to know why Hayden’s been keeping things from me, and another part wants to stay in denial. But I still need answers and an explanation.
“Yeah, you can, but you need to explain a few things. Total honesty, remember?”
“I will. I promise.” He opens the door and flicks on a lamp, brightening the room decorated with Mission-style oak furniture.
Hayden has been silent since we entered, as if his thoughts are a million miles away. He leaves me in the living room and goes to the main house. I sink onto the comfy couch and close my eyes. He returns with thick wool socks, cotton pajama bottoms, and one of his oversized T-shirts. Best of all, a new toothbrush still in the wrapper.
In the bathroom, I undress and put on the clean clothes. The shirt has Hayden’s scent, a light musk. I fold my formalwear and stack it on the floor. Feeling fully sober now, I glance in the mirror, staring at my ghostly pale complexion.
“Are you okay in there?” Hayden calls through the door. “Everything fit?”
“Yup, all good.” I run my fingers through my tousled hair, then brush my teeth for a good
three minutes and gargle with the mouthwash I find under the sink.
When I exit the bathroom, Hayden’s sitting on the sofa, wearing a pair of grey sweats and a white T-shirt, fidgeting with the string on his pants.
“I’m so sorry you have to go through all this insanity.”
“It’s okay. And, Hayden? Will you stay in the cottage tonight?” I rub my arms. “I don’t want to be alone and—”
“Of course. The bedroom is on the left and I put clean sheets on the bed.” He stands, his brow wrinkling. “Just let me check the grounds to make sure it’s safe. I’ll be right back.”
Hayden leaves the cottage and I go into the bedroom softly lit by a single lamp on the nightstand. A mahogany four-poster bed rests on the aging hardwood floors, a tall dresser leans against one wall, with an overstuffed chair in one corner near the lone window. I shuffle to the bed and sit with my back against the headboard, tugging the blankets over my legs. My head turns at the sound of the front door being opened, then closed tight.
He appears in the doorway. “I’ll be on the couch if you need me. Try to sleep and we can talk in the morning.”
“Wait, will you stay in here with me?” I ask. “I-I’m scared to be alone.”
Hayden locks the bedroom door behind him, checks the window, then mutely slides onto the bed and settles beside me on top of the covers. His leg brushes against mine. His scent hits my nostrils, freshly washed linen and expensive cologne. My pulse is suddenly galloping. I turn my head and Hayden gazes back at me with his hands laced in his lap.
“This is surreal,” I say.
“Yeah, it is. So I guess,” he murmurs, “I need to explain a few things.”
“Let’s start by you telling me about Neela.”
“There’s not much to tell. My parents arranged the union between our two families years ago.” He crosses his legs at the ankles. “Neela is a descendant from one of the first soldiers who underwent the Zeta DNA experiment, the same as my family, so we’re considered royals among the clan.”
“So you’re like an alien prince?”
Hayden snickers with a shake of his head. “No. It’s only my birthright to assume leadership one day and become one of the thirteen members of the GB. New leaders are selected every generation or so.”
“That doesn’t explain why you have to marry Neela.”
“Her family is one of the most powerful and influential of our clan. Our alliance is supposed to unite the Meleah and bring peace, so a betrothal was planned between Neela and me years ago. Right now, the clan is divided. Some want to rebel against the suppression of ST and others don’t want things to change out of fear,” he replies evenly. “When I heard your father bravely proposed a solution to the Brotherhood, I wanted to support him.”
“Is integration the best solution? You, I mean we, would be exposing ourselves to the world, to the general population. Is that safe?”
“I suppose there will be consequences and some fallout.” He shudders. “Plus, numerous hate groups. But I think it’s worth it, if you and I don’t have to sneak around anymore.”
“I have another question. How do you know the Zetas are returning?”
“Maybe they never left…”
My chin practically hits my lap. “Zetas are still here? On Earth?”
“It’s only a rumor,” he says. “I’m so sorry about all the secrecy. I didn’t want you to get involved in Meleah politics until I had a chance to sort it out. Mainly to avoid having this exact conversation.”
“I get that, but you should’ve told me. What if Sector Thirteen finds my family before—”
“They won’t,” Hayden says confidently, his hand finding mine. “When your father came to the GB, Arcane told me they immediately posted guards at your house to protect your family. They’ve been discreet and vigilant…however, they don’t know about the residue on your skin. I was afraid to tell them, but I think we should before the reapers find you. It’s getting too dangerous now and I can’t handle this alone.”
“But—”
“Let me finish. You wanted me to talk, so this is me talking.” He shifts to face me. “This is probably going to be strike three for me, but I hope you can see that it’s much more than another useless apology.”
His husky voice does strange things to my insides, yet I eye him closely. “Oh? What is it then?”
“Persistence, with a touch of groveling, and a pledge. Take your pick of adjectives.”
“While I appreciate the honesty and all the groveling, I still don’t completely trust you.”
“I know, and I’m all tied up in knots, Sloane…” He hangs his head, his long bangs flopping over his face. “I want to make my parents happy, but it’s hard because I feel like I’m being torn in two. I have a responsibility to the Meleah as a leader, and yet I just want to turn my back on all that political bullshit and just be with you,” he says, his voice gruff.
I touch his arm, stroking his skin. His body tenses and he eyes me warily, as if I might hurt him. As if I ever could.
“Your dad had the right idea by escaping the strict rules enforced by ST and our people,” he continues. “Sometimes…the pressure is too much.”
I glance down at my hands folded in my lap. “I’m glad you’re telling me what I want to know, but I’m still trying to understand your motives, and why you don’t trust me.”
“Some things were difficult to explain and I didn’t want to keep hurting you. Except now I’m glad you know everything, it makes things easier somehow.” Hayden takes a deep breath and relaxes his stiff posture, like a great weight has been lifted from his shoulders. “I can’t stop thinking about you. When we’re together, it just feels so right.” His voice sounds hoarse as if from finally saying what he’s obviously been thinking about for a while.
“I know, I sense it, too,” I say quietly.
He stares at me with a heart-thawing expression and takes my hands, his thumb gently rubbing over the back of mine. “If I have to wait until we’re both old and grey for you to see that we belong together, then I’ll wait. I’m not going anywhere. This is it for me. You’re it for me. I can’t avoid my feelings for you any longer. I just need one last chance to make things right,” he begs. “Please...do you hear what I’m saying? I’ll do anything.”
Saturated by unnatural silence, the room bristles with an unnerving sense of expectancy. His head tilts, lips parting. I stare at him, wrestling with my own emotions. His gaze is searching, questioning. Full of hope and longing. Suddenly, the distance between us seems like a deep ocean of unspoken words.
“I still don’t understand why you couldn’t tell me all this.”
“Look, there are things I want to tell you, but I can’t. I may never be able to, and I need you to understand—”
“I don’t have many dating deal-breakers, Hayden, except that I think we both should agree that I’m totally awesome, brutal honesty is the key to a lasting relationship, and scary movies are a must-have. And I don’t know if I could date someone who doesn’t like fright flicks, because I feel like they couldn’t relate to me on a cosmic level. You seem to get me and don’t mind that I live and breathe horror—and honestly, I’ve never met anyone who I liked being with as much as you. But…my second rule must be complied with at all times going forward. Got it?”
“Yes, I accept your terms.” He clears his throat, his gaze pleading with mine. “So, you’re saying…what?”
I smile. “Second chance granted.”
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Now let’s kiss and makeup.”
“I like you’re thinking.”
He lowers his head closer to mine. Our lips press together gently, soft and sweet. The butterflies’ dancing in my belly become frenzied. Our tongues lightly brush together, and he tastes like a mint-chocolate milkshake. The deep kisses leave no room for thought. Only feeling and wanting and touching. That’s all. We are a tangle of arms and legs as he moves closer. He’s half lying on top
of me and I scoot down, so we are chest to chest. The effects of the sexy kiss ricochet through my entire body, sizzling my blood. It’s so easy to get lost in him, lost in the amazing, earth-shattering connection between us.
When his hands slip under my shirt to caress my skin, it’s as though he warms every cell of my body with his touch. Caressing him, kissing him, feels like having a high fever. My body burns for more. Clothes separate our skin and I suddenly want to rip them off. The world catches on fire and I would let it burn in this moment, if it meant we could be together…
Finally, Hayden ends the kiss by pulling back. My eyes open slowly, my mind dazed. His face is flushed and his lips swollen. He’s panting and staring down into my eyes.
“Damn…” he whispers. “That was…wow.”
“I don’t want to stop. Ever.”
“I don’t want to stop kissing you, either. But we have to,” he says with a trace of regret in his tone. “Although, the only thing I want to do right now is hold you in my arms all night.”
“Just a little more, please…before we go back to reality.” I grab his shirt, yanking him close again.
He crookedly smiles. “Hmmm. You talked me into it.”
My arms slide over his chest and grip his hair, tugging his head closer to my lips. His mouth crushes mine. Firm. Delicious. His hand trails along my legs and anchor onto my low back. He jerks me closer, until there’s nothing but air separating our bodies. My lips tingle. Kissing Hayden seems so perfect and right. The heat of the lean, hard body pressing into mine makes me rethink my vow to wait until marriage to have sex again.
He lifts his mouth from mine, and I gaze at him through heavy eyes, panting a little. I clear my throat, trying to fight the drugging effects of his body-melting kisses.
“So, um, what do we do now?” I ask.
“Give me just a little more time to fix this misunderstanding with my family. I’ll figure out a way to sort everything out without anyone getting hurt—I swear it, Peaches.”
My heart swells. His declaration fills me with an overwhelming sense of hope. Then the sensation is doused by cold reality.