A Silent Prayer

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A Silent Prayer Page 37

by Samreen Ahsan


  “Hey, Rania. Where are you going?” She hides her face from me, digging her head into my chest. Her body is shaking, but I don’t know why. “What’s wrong, baby? How do you know that woman?”

  “Please take me home, Adam. I can’t stay here.”

  “But what happened? Who is that woman? And who is Kiya?”

  She pulls away. “I am not answerable to you, Adam.” She looks around. “You carry on with the party. I will go home with Ali.”

  “No, Rania. I’ll take you home, but please tell me what just happened.” I pull her back into my embrace, but she resists. “All right, we’ll go home, but let’s just say goodbye to Mom and Brian. We can’t leave without that.” She nods in silence and follows me to where my mom is busy entertaining her guests. As soon as we reach her, a male voice sounds behind us.

  “Rania Ahmed?” Rania turns back, and looks at the guy with shock. She puts her hands to her mouth with excitement.

  “Nathan?” She steps toward him and he offers her a tight, warm embrace.

  “I can’t believe you’re here. I thought I would never see you again.” He hugs Rania tightly, lifting her feet from the ground. They’re meeting like long-lost friends.

  “I can’t believe it either. Three years, huh?” She smiles and pulls away from Nathan’s embrace. I clear my throat to distract her attention and she looks at me. “Oh yes, Nathan. This is—”

  “Adam Gibson. Who doesn’t know him?” Nathan offers his hand for a firm handshake. I accept his gesture instantly.

  “Pleasure meeting you, Nathan. How’s everything?” I try to be courteous, as much as I can.

  “Do you guys know each other?” Rania looks toward both of us, back and forth.

  “This is my parents’ party.” Nathan says. “How about you?” He looks at Rania quizzically.

  “It’s my mother’s party too,” I interrupt. “And she’s with me.” I pull Rania toward me and wrap my arm around her waist. Nathan glares at us, as if he’s not buying the idea of us together. What’s his damn problem? He looks at Rania with a question, and she smiles shyly and looks down.

  “I can’t believe you’re dating someone, Rania.” He looks at her as if he plans to eat her. Doesn’t he follow news?

  “Why? Is that a problem, Nathan?” I ask, frowning.

  He keeps staring at her. “You’re involved with him?” He shakes his head and passes his fingers through his hair.

  “All these years, I kept thinking it was our cultural differences that came between us. I just can’t believe I never mattered to you.”

  “It’s not what you think, Nathan. I was in the middle of my University studies. I wasn’t ready for marriage.” Rania speaks in a low tone, to avoid anyone listening to our conversation. Marriage? What? He proposed to her in the past?

  “You guys dated?” I look at Rania in surprise.

  “Dated? Ha! I wish…” Nathan responds sarcastically. “I thought no man existed on this planet who could charm her.” He pats my arm. “You are one lucky man.” He smirks at both of us.

  Just in time, Mom shows up. “Nathan, darling. How is my son doing?” Mom hugs Nathan tightly and kisses him on his forehead. “Did you meet this pretty girl, Rania? She’s Adam’s girlfriend.” She looks at us proudly.

  Nathan puts his arm around Mom’s shoulders. “You remember I told you about a girl, during my degree program?”

  “The one you wanted to marry and we got the ring for?” Mom asks in surprise.

  “That’s right. She’s the one.” He cocks his head toward Rania.

  Mom gapes in astonishment. “I can’t believe it.” Rania looks extremely uncomfortable at this moment. “But you told me she refused you because…”

  “That’s right. I don’t know how Adam got so lucky.” Nathan looks at me with furious eyes.

  “You never told me he proposed to you.” My gaze gets intense on her.

  “There was nothing to say.” She averts her eyes from me and looks toward Nathan.

  “If you don’t mind, Mr. Gibson, can I steal your girlfriend for a few minutes?” He looks at me and then at Rania. “Some dudes from the university are here. You wanna see them?”

  “Hang on, Nathan.” Mom stops him from moving further. “Tell your friends that dinner is served. Rania, Adam, please, join us for dinner.”

  We all sit at the large family table. Rania sits next to me. When Scott Junior starts to cry in his mother’s lap, waving toward Rania, she takes the baby and cuddles him, letting him play with her necklace.

  “Tina, can I give him mashed potato?” Rania asks Scott’s wife.

  “Oh, he’s a fussy baby. He doesn’t eat anything. I try to give him vegetables and mashed fruits but God, he’s a terrible eater.”

  “Just like his father,” Mr. Moore says, and everyone laughs. Rania mashes green peas and potato and adds some butter. Everyone watches as she starts singing the nursery rhyme row-row-row-the-boat, to which the baby responds excitedly and opens his mouth. She keeps doing it, till the baby has had around twenty mini-spoonfuls of mashed vegetables.

  “I think you’ll have to move in with me, Rania. He likes you to feed him.” Tina winks at her, and thanks Rania for feeding the baby. “You should eat now.” She offers to hold the child, but he refuses to leave Rania’s embrace.

  “Do you want me to feed you?” I whisper in her ear, but accidentally my moron sister hears it.

  “Oh my God! Look at the romance.” Eva puts her hands over her mouth. Annoyed, I glare at my sister, but she doesn’t stop.

  “What happened?” Nathan asks, sitting at her other side.

  “Adam offered to feed his pretty lady… with his own hands… ooo.” Why is my sister so irritating? I roll my eyes and frown at her over Rania’s shoulder.

  “I’m fine. I will manage,” Rania says, almost in a whisper. The baby is sleeping peacefully, resting his head on her soft breasts, holding her chain in his small fingers. She tucks the baby more closely over her body.

  “I thought you were a magnet to men only, but damn… babies too?” Nathan pops his head toward her in amazement. “Well, I guess he’s a man as well. Who wouldn’t want to sleep like that?” Nathan’s remark makes me choke on my wine.

  “Eva and Nathan, stop teasing,” Mr. Moore commands his spoilt kids. “Tina, take the baby from Rania, so she can eat.” Tina gets up from her seat and Rania hands the sleeping baby to his mother. No one dares to speak for the rest of the meal. Finally, when we’re finished eating, Nathan asks again if he can take her to meet their old friends.

  Rania’s eyes sparkle at the idea. She looks at me and I pull my arm away from her waist to let her go. A moment ago, she wanted to go home, and now, after seeing Nathan, she seems to forget everything. The way Nathan is looking at her, I am damn sure they had a past. He can’t have been proposing to her out of the blue. Why didn’t she ever tell me? But if I think about it, she’s never told me anything about her past. I’ve shared everything of my life with her, but she’s still a mystery to me. I’m always finding new secrets about her, but never from her. First the old creepy lady, and then Nathan, my mother’s stepson. Nathan takes Rania’s hand and leads her into the crowd, where a few people of their age are standing. They’re all surprised to see her. She seems to forget her worries for a moment, and I let her enjoy the time on her own. After all, we have a whole night waiting for us. She told me she would like to share her past with me tonight. I just can’t wait to know. I go over to the bar and settle myself with another glass of wine. She is quite far from me, but my eyes are guarding her across the distance. In the background, they are playing “Amazed.” I keep looking toward her, focusing on the song and how it fits my current feelings. She truly amazes me. She glances at me a couple of times during her conversation. She knows I’m watching her. Nathan says something to his old friends, and they all look in my direction. I assum
e he’s telling them Rania is going out with me. I’m in the middle of my drink when Mom joins me.

  “How is she doing, after last night?” Mom asks with concern.

  “Better than she was.” I shake my head. “I thought I lost her.”

  “She’s here with you now, darling.” Mom places a comforting hand on my shoulder.

  “You know what, Mom? In all these years, I have built so many houses and residential properties. I have donated so much to provide shelter to the poor. But the woman I care about most is feeling homeless right now. And there’s nothing I can do about it. It’s so strange and unfair. Isn’t it?”

  Mom takes a deep breath and says, “God has different ways of doing things. You should be thankful that she’s safe.”

  “I am. I have no words to express how much.” We both look toward Rania and Nathan, busy talking.

  “The world is very small. I didn’t know she was the same girl who captured Nathan’s heart.” She faces the crowd, taking a sip of her wine. I cock my head toward her, to grasp what she is trying to say. “Nathan told me he was in love with an Arab girl. He even asked me to help him buy the engagement ring for her. He wanted to propose, before graduation, so that they could get married right afterward. She refused… telling him that because of their cultural differences, her father would not allow it. I don’t know how that goes with you.”

  “Her father is still not buying the idea of us together. And to tell you the truth, Mom, she considers me only a friend.” I keep looking out at the crowd, but I know my mother is watching me keenly.

  “Are you serious? Can’t you see, Adam, that she is in love with you?”

  “Did she tell you that?”

  “Did you tell me you love her?” she asks me instead. I blink at her in astonishment. How does she know? “No, Adam, you didn’t, but you’re my son and I can see it in your eyes. And I see the same spark in her eyes.” She puts her hand on my shoulder. “You have lived your life all alone. I’m glad you found someone who is true to you. I know she sees beyond your riches, and that’s what makes her special. But just remember one thing. Don’t lose the trust you have in her. She is beautiful, wise, and intelligent, and you will come across many men who will want to take your place. You need to trust that she has chosen you, and not the others. Don’t ever let skepticism come between you. If there is doubt in a relationship, then it doesn’t stand a chance.”

  She takes a sip of her wine. “I know you’re looking at her right now, with Nathan, and it makes you unhappy. But don’t make the mistake your father did, and spoil your relationship with distrust.” I listen to my mother’s advice intently. My father spent the rest of his life trying to make up for that single mistake, but he couldn’t. I can’t let myself do that, if I claim I love her. Love requires faith and patience.

  She spends a long time with her friends, and it’s getting hard for me to breathe and control my feelings. To compensate, I consume as much alcohol as I can. She looks even more seductive to me when I’m drunk. I walk over to her, ignoring the crowd, which is looking at me. When I get close enough to tell her, in front of everyone, that I do love her, Nathan grabs her hand.

  “You have got to dance with me to this song. Let’s relive the memory.” And without giving us any chance to look at each other, he rushes her onto the dance floor and starts dancing with her crazily to “She Bangs.” Rania is laughing heartily, swirling in his arms, not caring if I’m watching or not.

  “I can’t believe they remember all the moves, even after three years.” One of the guys in their circle of friends speaks out.

  “They practiced that one for almost six months,” another guy says. “That’s why they won the competition. It was a breathtaking performance. I always thought they were a couple. Look how they move together when they dance.”

  My blood boils with envy. I see Rania and Nathan dancing seductively, like a perfectly blended couple. The way he is touching her everywhere, during the dance, and the way she swooshes around in his arms, it seems like he’s claiming her whole body. All the people around them are watching and clapping at their extraordinary performance. So this is a blast from their past?

  They performed in some competition, and even after all these years, both of them still remember all the moves? The sight of Rania getting so physically close to someone is spiking adrenaline in my body. The insecurity, fear and anxiety overwhelm me, and I head for the dance floor, drink still in my hand. She is laughing with that man, avoiding and ignoring my eyes on her, as if she’s escaped to some other world where I don’t exist. When I reach the dance floor, that’s when Nathan touches her neckline with his fingers, as a part of the dance move, and she closes her eyes in pleasure. My jealousy overflows and I smash the glass on the floor.

  The music stops and everyone turns to look at me with shock. I pull Rania out of Nathan’s filthy hands, grab her neck, and kiss her wildly on the lips, without even looking at her expression. After a few seconds I push her away and glare at her with my burning drunken eyes.

  “You are mine,” I yell. “Do you hear that? Don’t you dare dance with anyone. You are fucking mine.” She looks at me with utter shock. I didn’t realize my ferocious kiss had bruised her soft lips, and her lower lip is bleeding. She flicks her finger on her wounded lip and a single tear runs down her cheek as she looks at the drop of blood on her fingertip. She looks around, and runs toward the exit.

  “Asshole,” Nathan shouts at me, and runs after Rania.

  Suddenly, everything around me is frozen. I feel like time has halted. I fall down on my knees and start rubbing my hands over the shattered glass. The photographers start clicking my painful moment, until Brian pushes everyone away. My mother rushes toward me.

  “Adam, what are you doing? You have injured your hand.” She picks up my hand, which is soaked in blood and pierced with fine shards of glass.

  “I lost her, Mom. I lost her.” I look at my bloodied hands fiercely, taking deep, agonized breaths. Mom looks at me with tears in her eyes. She doesn’t say anything to comfort me. She knows what I’ve done.

  “My pride, my envy, destroyed everything. I lost everything with my own jealousy.” I shake my head in disbelief. “You warned me, Mom, but I…” Tears start clouding my eyes, until I can’t see anything around me. Suddenly, something crosses my mind and I look to my mother for help. “Where did she go? Where would she go? She has no home. Everything was burned last night. Mom, find her. Where did she go?”

  Author’s Note:

  I hope you’ve enjoyed A Silent Prayer. Adam and Rania’s story continues as Rania’s mystery unfolds in the sequel, A Prayer Heeded.

  ENDNOTES

  1Donald Cargill (1619-1681)

  2W. C. Fields (1880-1946)

  3Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)

  4Ali ibn Abi Talib (607-661)

  5Charles Kingsley (1819-1875)

  6Christopher Morley (1890-1957)

  7Ali ibn Abi Talib (607-661)

 

 

 


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