"But you're one of the most wanted people in the universe," Lizbeth said, sounding a bit surprised.
"My entire bounty was funded by my old Academy supervisor in an attempt to blackmail me." Lyssa glared at Lizbeth. "Seems to be a theme."
"Well, if you had a better disguise, maybe people wouldn't recognize you!" Lizbeth smiled back at her before pausing curiously. "Why doesn't Jukin recognize you?"
"He doesn't like to remember that Lyssa Peate exists." She recalled his snarling face in his office, the way he openly berated her.
"So he really doesn't recognize you?" Lizbeth said. "All that…anger is directed towards Lyssa Peate? Not to Razia?"
"Yep," Lyssa said. "There's a special level of hatred for me in the family."
"What did you do?"
"I did nothing," Lyssa snapped, her hackles raising.
"Wow, sorry." Lizbeth's eyes widened from the ferocity of the retort. "So what happened with your boss? Is he still blackmailing you?"
"I took care of him," Lyssa said, intentionally vague.
"I thought pirates didn't kill?"
"We don't, he just...." she trailed off, wondering how best to phrase it. Obviously, she couldn't tell Lizbeth that Pymus had fallen into Plethegon because the Great Creator deemed his soul unworthy to pass the Arch of Eron. "Let's just say he realized his mistake and backed off."
"But didn't cancel his bounty on your head?"
"No, thankfully," Lyssa said. If her bounty was cancelled, she'd be in serious trouble. "Still, I would much rather have other pirates ponying up some credits. His bounty won't last forever."
"They've got to come around soon," Lizbeth said with an optimistic smile. "I mean, you've made more progress in two days than I've made in four months."
"Yeah…" Lyssa sighed, annoyed that she hadn't gotten further.
"Well, I'm beat. Good night."
Lyssa grunted the same and flipped off the light next to her bed. She lay in the darkness, unable to sleep from the sound of someone else who was not Vel breathing nearby. Her mind ran through thoughts and memories of the day, coming to circle around the memory of Tauron's death. She didn't know the particulars of how Jukin got the money or whom he paid off, but the result was the same either way, so what did it matter?
She flipped over on her side, hoping the change of position would clear her mind. Her eyes fell on a speck in the distance. Lyssa's ship was orbiting around S-6642 until they could figure out their next steps, and she was sure they were the only extra-planetary vehicle out here. As the speck grew in the window, it began to take the shape of a giant woman with a vapid smile holding a serving tray. The image was somewhat familiar, a brand ingrained in her head from years of advertising exposure. In the depths of her half-asleep mind, she remembered the woman was selling alcohol.
The vapid woman's figure was large enough to fill the window, and that was when she noticed a small diner at the base of the giant plastic woman, and a docking station large enough to hold huge transport ships.
Lyssa's eyes suddenly snapped open and she was wide awake.
"Lizbeth."
"Mmph…"
"Wake up." Lyssa turned on the lights.
"What?" Lizbeth whined, her eyes blinking in the brightness.
"Look out there," Lyssa said, pointing out her window.
"It's Lorna Howell," Lizbeth muttered, rolling back over. "Do you want a drink or something?"
"She's got a diner at her feet," Lyssa said, annoyed that Lizbeth was doing something as stupid as sleeping when there was a new break in their investigation.
"So?" Lizbeth mumbled.
"So, there's also a docking station there," Lyssa smiled, kicking herself for not realizing it sooner. "And last year, I found Delmur at a diner not on S-6642!"
To her annoyance, Lizbeth said nothing, obviously asleep.
"So," Lyssa repeated louder. "That means that we can probably find out where Delmur's gone to now!"
"God in Leveman's Vortex," Lizbeth groaned. "That's fantastic, but can we take care of it…I don't know…tomorrow?"
"I wanna go now," Lyssa said, already halfway to her closet to throw on her pirate clothes.
"Machine. You're a damned machine," Lizbeth sighed before tossing the covers off.
***
Razia double and triple checked her Delmur notes, but this was a different diner than where she had found Delmur the year before. That one hadn't had another transaction since about a month after her encounter. Perhaps without Delmur's regular money, they were forced to close.
Much like the diner last year, this one was completely devoid of people or other ships in the docking station. The only difference was the giant statue of a girl that stood on either side of the diner and docking station, her vapid smile and blonde hair calling on patrons to buy a brand of alcohol.
But, Razia noted with a smile, it was definitely big enough to host multiple transport ships.
Grabbing the still half-asleep Lizbeth by the arm, Razia pulled her towards the diner. Through the big windows, Razia could see the walls were papered with all kinds of advertisements, some for the same alcohol that the woman above was selling, some for a brand of food, but most of them were for General State's presidential campaign. His stern face met them with an icy glare even before they set foot inside the diner.
"Do we have to go inside?" Lizbeth asked, yawning.
"Of course we do," Razia replied, pushing open the door. There were two people inside the diner: a snoozing cook whose apron looked as if he hadn’t cooked in some time, and a waitress who was doing games in a game book. She couldn't remember if they were the same two from the other diner, but they surely looked similar.
"Well!" The waitress looked up and shoved the cook awake. "Look here, we got ourselves some guests!"
"Is it one of them?" the cook asked sleepily.
"No, no, it’s these two pretty girls," the waitress adjusted the tie on her apron. "Have a seat where you like, at the bar or at a table."
"We’ll sit over here," Razia said, dragging Lizbeth over to a table.
"What can we get you to drink, then?" the waitress said, holding her pad and pencil ready in her hand.
Razia was shocked. Waitresses in bars were one thing, but diners like these usually used computerized ordering systems. Normal pad and pencil waitresses had disappeared long ago.
"Oh, this thing?" the waitress said, noticing Razia’s stare. "Steve likes to do things the old-fashioned way. No computers for us in this place!"
Razia gave Lizbeth a look, but Lizbeth was too busy trying to stay awake to notice.
"Coffee," Razia said.
"Coming right up!" The waitress scurried over to the counter to pour a cup.
"Wake up," Razia hissed at Lizbeth. "For someone who's gone through so much trouble to get this far, you are awfully uninterested in what's going on."
"Ugh, what?" Lizbeth snapped back at her.
"Look around," Razia hissed at her. "I found Evet Delmur in the same kind of place last year. There's advertising everywhere, but who in Leveman's Vortex would come all the way out here? The only customers they'd have would be Antica and her secretary, and I don't think Antica's much for diner food."
"So what?" Lizbeth yawned.
"So you told me to point out when things are weird. And this place…oh, thank you." Razia forced herself upright and smiled as a coffee was placed in front of her.
"You are quite welcome, darlin'!" The waitress grinned.
"General State, huh?" Razia asked, looking to the poster glaring down at them.
"Oh, that bozo?" The waitress sniffed, giving him the once over. "We only put up the posters we get. The advertising is just enough to cover the costs of running this place, you see."
"Don’t get much business?" Razia asked as Lizbeth laid her head down on the table to go back to sleep.
"Oh goodness, no. Most folks don’t even know that this little place is below Lorna."
"I see," Razia replied, kickin
g Lizbeth under the table to wake her up. "So how long have you been here?"
"'Bout a year," the waitress said, glancing back over to the cook who was snoozing again. "We used to be over near B-7926. We were about bankrupt when this gentlemen came in and asked us if we’d like to open up out here. He said that business was gonna pick up once S-6642 was better settled." The waitress shrugged.
"Oh?" Razia said, trying to seem innocent. "Really? Wasn't S-6642 bought just a few years ago? Seems a bit…soon to put you out here, doesn't it?"
The waitress gave her a curious look. "Yeah, well…so what brings you two out here?"
"We're looking for a man named Zephyr Benson, otherwise known as Evet Delmur," Lizbeth said with a yawn, much to Razia's consternation. "You seen him?"
"Oh y-no." The waitress cleared her throat and began absent-mindedly writing on her pad and paper. "I mean yes, but not for a few months, that is."
"Why'd he stop coming out here?" Lizbeth asked, ignorant of Razia's silent mouthing to knock it off.
"Well, I'm sure I don't know."
"What's on the menu?" Razia snapped before Lizbeth could ask any more questions.
"Soup and a special," the waitress said. Razia could hear the nerves in the waitress' voice.
"I think we’ll try that special," Razia said quickly.
"Right away!" The waitress grinned, writing it down and trotting back over to the counter.
"Don't ask such direct questions," Razia hissed at Lizbeth
"I got tired of you dancing around the truth," Lizbeth growled. "Just ask the damned woman, what's the problem?"
"Look at this place," Razia hissed back. "You wouldn't even know it was here unless you were told it was here. It's covered in advertising, but doesn't get any customers? And I don't see a computer anywhere to take our C-cards."
"So what?"
"Not to mention all of these posters for General State," Razia said, pointing to the stern general. "Didn't those two guys say that they worked for him?"
"Yes, they did which is why I'm trying to get to the bottom of it. I don't understand why you're beating around the bush instead of just being direct—"
Razia saw the glinting metal out of the corner of her eye. But she didn't register what it was until a bullet hole appeared three inches from Lizbeth's head.
"Shit!" Razia screamed, diving under the table.
"Are you crazy?" Lizbeth screamed and dove under as well. Bullets ricocheted off the table and onto the windows. "You'll kill us all!"
"Sorry dear," the waitress said, her gun pointed at the bullet-riddled table. Razia could see the waitress' feet in front of them, and held her breath that she wouldn't dip under the table where they would be sitting ducks. "But you see, I got direct orders to kill anyone who stops by here who ain't part of what we're doing. And if you hadn't asked so many questions…"
"Go on, shoot back at her!" Lizbeth spat at Razia.
"With what gun?" Razia hissed, low enough that the woman wouldn't hear. But they had to do something fast, or else the woman would blast a hole clean through the table and actually hit them.
Razia spotted a broken shard of her coffee cup laying next to them and the woman's panty-hosed legs standing in front of the table.
"Sorry girls, I really hate to—"
Razia dug the cup fragment into the woman's leg, who screamed and dropped her gun to the ground. Razia leapt out from under the table and snatched it up. She fumbled for a few moments to hold the giant shotgun menacingly; she'd never actually held a gun before.
However, her ruse seemed to be working as the waitress began sobbing hysterically.
"No, no," the woman said, tears streaming down her face as she clutched at her bleeding leg. "Please don't! I was only following orders. Please…"
"I'm not going to kill you," Razia snapped, gripping the gun tighter. "But I still want to know who ordered you to kill us. And why?"
"MaryAnne…" The cook was also waving a shotgun, but lowered it when he saw Razia had the waitress cornered. "Don't go telling her nothin'."
"Please don't hurt us," the woman sobbed. "Please, I beg of you…"
"You two are under arrest!" Lizbeth stood up from under the table and yanked out her badge. "Assault on a Universal Government employee, using what I would wager to guess are illegally acquired guns."
"What in Leveman's Vortex are you doing?" Razia drawled.
"Arresting them," Lizbeth said plainly. "Also, the Universal Police are on their way."
"Oh great, they'll be back out on the street tomorrow," Razia shook her head.
"Not those police," Lizbeth sighed. "Now, you may be granted immunity if you provide a full confession." She sat down on a nearby chair with her fingers on her mini-computer. "What is this diner doing here? What is your connection to Krishna Harman? How are you connected to General State? What kind of cargo is being passed through here?"
The cook and the waitress, who was still quietly sobbing in pain, said nothing.
"Can you threaten them or something?" Lizbeth asked to Razia, exasperated.
"I've already got a gun pointed at them. What more do you want?" Razia snapped back.
"I don't know, say you'll shoot them or something."
"Why don't you threaten to shoot them?"
"Because I'd get fired; but you're a pirate."
"You can threaten us all you want," the cook said. "But we ain't gonna tell you nothin'."
"You heard the man," Razia said.
"Can you at least tie them up or something, bounty hunter?" Lizbeth threw her hands up.
Razia shoved the gun into Lizbeth's hands and marched back to her ship to retrieve some of her bounding material, muttering angrily about receiving orders from a helpless investigator.
***
Some three hours later, the Universal Police finally showed up. As expected, they weren't the Special Forces, but the regular police. They took no notice of Razia as she helped herself to yet another cup of coffee, her third since they had arrived at the diner. Razia had attempted to locate something that looked like food in the back room, but found it completely devoid of anything defrosted.
Even though she was hungry and over caffeinated, she was enjoying watching the scene in front of her: Lizbeth trying to retain control of the situation while the Universal Police, apparently the most inefficient three that they could send, were trying to take her statement.
"And I also have reason to suspect they've been supporting the transfer of stolen goods from pirates," Lizbeth said.
"Whoa," the officer said, holding up his hands. He was a portly man with a thick layer of unshaven scruff around his sweaty face. "Lady, we don't deal with pirates. Talk to Peate."
"You don't, but I do," Lizbeth said, exasperated. "I've talked to Peate. He's not interested in taking this case."
"Then why'd you drag us out here?" the officer asked lazily.
"Because they shot at me!" Lizbeth cried. "And I am an agent with the Intelligence Agency!"
"Well, looks like your friend stabbed her in the leg," a deputy mentioned.
"That was after they shot at us!"
"Yeah, I'm not sure we've got enough evidence to continue this investigation," the officer replied, closing his notepad. "If pirates are involved, we have to contact Peate's team, and then there's a sixty day waiting period until they can start their investigation."
Razia snorted in amusement.
Lizbeth, however, looked like she was about to wrap her hands around his meaty neck.
"So what are you going to do with these two?" she snapped. "I need you to arrest them so I can interview them!"
"Looks like little missy over there needs to get to a hospital." He motioned to the waitress being tended to by two other police officers. "She'd have half a mind to have me arrest your friend over there." His eyes drifted over to Razia, who smiled and sensed that she was about to pile onto Lizbeth.
"I'd like to see you try. I'm a pirate," she said.
"Aw shit,"
the officer cursed, giving Lizbeth an exasperated look. "And you want me to arrest these poor people? What did they do to you?"
"They shot at me!" Lizbeth screamed, finally losing her cool.
"All right, lady, I'm gonna ask you to calm down," the officer said. "We're gonna take these two to the nearest hospital, and we'll let you go with a warning."
"A war—are you serious?!" Lizbeth gaped as the two officers helped the crying waitress out of the diner, followed by her concerned cook.
"And you just be happy that it's only a warning, lady," the officer barked before he followed the other officers out the door.
Lizbeth stood, her eyes wide and her mouth hanging open as the police ship left the station.
"Well, I think that went well," Razia said, breaking the silence of the diner.
"Get sucked," Lizbeth seethed at her. "You think this is funny?"
"I'm just glad to see my pirate dues are being used effectively," Razia said, sliding off of the seat. "That was an incredible display of bureaucracy and stupidity."
"No matter," Lizbeth sniffed, seemingly trying to brush off this latest frustration. "We know we're onto something. The pirates are coming here to transfer illegal goods. The question is, where are they going?"
"And that is your mystery to solve," Razia smiled, folding her arms across her chest. "I'm out."
"Out?" Lizbeth gaped at her. "What do you mean, 'out'?"
"I'm out," Razia repeated. "I don't see anything going on here that's outside the normal business of piracy."
"What?" Lizbeth blinked at her. "But we've found something! This is obviously a lead! They shot at us!"
"Yeah, and I don't get shot at," Razia said firmly. "Go on and tell Jukin that I'm his sister; tell everyone. But from the looks of things, I don't think anyone's going to believe you."
"What?" Lizbeth breathed.
"Look at you," Razia laughed, motioning at the empty diner. "You've stooped so low as to employ a pirate to help you. You had to sneak into a pirate meeting. I don't see any back-up nor any team with you."
Lizbeth stood up straighter. "What are you saying, Lyssa?"
"I'm saying that I think you're barking up the wrong tree, and you should quit while you're ahead. Can't you take a hint?"
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