Just like it had with James.
Settling herself next to Lucky, she touched his shoulder. He jerked away as if he’d been burned.
“The same thing happened with James, Lucky. Everything was physical, and I lost sight of what a relationship was supposed to be about.”
Lucky began gathering the remnants of their food, tossing in the extra bread for the fish. He gave her a piece and she threw a chunk as far as she could. She smiled when it dipped below the water and disappeared.
“Every time we had a fight and James hit me, he’d try to make it all okay with sex. It worked for a while, but eventually I realized what he was doing, and I stopped responding to him.” Dear heavens, it killed her to admit that to Lucky, knowing he would have the upper hand. “When that happened, he didn’t even try to help me enjoy it.”
Lucky stared at her so long she thought he might shatter.
“And yet you stayed with him.” He made it sound like an accusation, like she was the one at fault.
“I didn’t know what else to do.”
“I don’t know,” he shrugged, his voice sour. “Maybe leave him?”
“I didn’t want to put my family at risk. I didn’t know what he was capable of.”
“So how did you finally leave him if you were so scared of him?”
Somehow, she suspected he knew the answers to all of these questions, but it felt good to get them out in the open. Maybe their friendship could grow from that.
“I caught him sleeping with another woman. Several, actually. I threatened his livelihood and told him I would take him to court for everything he was worth if he even tried to stop me. At that point in his life, money was worth more than I was. I had access to all of his bank accounts, and he knew I would do it.”
“So what stopped him from just killing you?”
Lana shrugged, a chill running through her bones. “I like to think there’s still good in him somewhere.”
Lucky snorted.
“I’m still here, aren’t I? Something must have stopped him. If it wasn’t his conscience then maybe he just forgot to make a run to get bullets. Either way, I left and never looked back. Our divorce was final six weeks later. Money can apparently move the courts along.”
Lana turned and made her way across the rocks as swiftly as she could. She heard Lucky calling for her but she ignored him. She didn’t want to think about her life and how morose the outlook was.
Her first marriage had failed miserably, her second was nothing but business. Soon, she’d have the baby of the man she hated more than anything else on this earth. After that, chances were her second marriage would fail and she’d be all alone … again.
Angry tears streamed down her face. She didn’t want to feel sorry for herself. She didn’t want to care what Lucky thought. But he’d been nice to her, and she’d always been a sucker for anyone showing her a shred of decency. How pathetic.
Lana slipped and stumbled over a few rocks before Lucky caught up with her. His rough hand turned her around and held her close. For the first time since she’d met the adult Lucky, the embrace wasn’t one to entice her sexually.
He comforted her, held her head against his warmth where she could hear his frantic heart beat. Soothing words flowed from his tongue as he planted kisses in her hair. Tired of fighting the need inside of her, she wrapped her arms around him and snuggled in closer. He smelled so good and felt so right.
It had been a long time since she’d felt that safe.
Chapter Ten
Lucky opened the front door to the cabin and ushered Lana in. After their long day of hiking and then their dinner at Gina’s, they were both exhausted. Not only had emotions run high, but Lana’s ankles were swollen and dark circles lined her eyes.
“Let’s get you to bed,” he whispered, rubbing her shoulders the way his mom used to rub his when he was tired. Some days he missed his family, but when they’d moved to Florida to retire in warmer weather, he knew they had finally gone home. But this small town was his home. He loved the people and how much everyone cared for each other.
He walked with Lana to the bedroom, massaging all the way, and sat her down on the edge of the bed. Stooping, he took off her heels. He wanted to gloat that he’d been right: wearing heels after hiking all day wasn’t the best thing for a pregnant woman to do, but he bit his lip instead. She looked beautiful tonight with her flowing shirt and skirt. Big hoop earrings dangled from her ears.
“Lay back,” he ordered softly.
Surprisingly, she did and her eyes drifted closed. He massaged the arches of her feet and rubbed them so they wouldn’t be stiff in the morning. Experience had taught him that he shouldn’t go to bed without a good rub down after a long work out.
“That feels amazing,” she sighed.
A grin lifted his lips. She was amazing. No other word could describe what he saw before him.
He considered it a blessing that she trusted him, even if it was coming in small degrees. Today, she’d admitted to the horrible things he’d only suspected James had done to her. Now, knowledge was power, and he was going to show her he was nothing like her ex.
He’d learned today that nothing but time would teach her that, too. James had played all of his cards right in the beginning, said and done all the right things. Then, after they were married, he’d turned into a monster. What if he’d warned her before they married? Lucky had certainly seen a side of James that hadn’t been all romance and heroics.
He didn’t want to dwell on the fact that perhaps he could have changed her path in life if only he had persisted. It was water under the bridge now, and he needed to move forward. They both did. While his need for revenge against the man who had humiliated him was still great, his need for his wife to fully trust him was taking precedence. He wasn’t sure how he felt about that.
But one thing was for sure; he wasn’t going to fall in love with her. Lana’s question at the waterfall that afternoon had shocked him into near cardiac arrest. Did she expect him to love her after such a short amount of time? Had James dropped the “L” word just to get what he wanted?
Regardless of the man’s motives, he’d meant it when he said he was an honest person. He didn’t want to love Lana, so he had no plans for anything on the contrary to happen. To do so would only mess up his plans to keep Lana and the baby safe and to finally have all that he’d ever wanted. Loving her would complicate things and put him at risk again for humiliation.
“Lana?” he asked softly, still rubbing her feet.
Her soft breathing answered him. She was asleep. He hated to wake her and make her change, but he didn’t think she would be comfortable sleeping in the billowing skirt she wore.
“Lana, sweetheart,” he called as he shook her gently.
“Hmm?”
“You should change into your pajamas. You’ll sleep better.”
“I’ll sleep better if you quit waking me up.” Her voice was so heavy she slurred her words. A tender tug as his heart was his reply.
“Okay. I’ll lay them on the end of the bed if you wake up and want to change.”
“M’kay.” With an official dismissal, she rolled over and presented her back to him, tucking her hands under her chin. Her breathing was slow and even again within seconds.
Standing, Lucky couldn’t help the second swell of emotion that rose in his throat. Yes, he finally had everything he’d ever wanted.
He bent over her and kissed her cheek and smoothed her hair away from her neck. “Goodnight, beautiful,” he whispered.
Leaving her alone was the hardest thing he’d ever done. There wasn’t anything he’d like more in that moment than to wrap his arms around her and hold her close.
*****
The next morning, Lucky had breakfast on the table and had already eaten by the time Lana walked into the kitchen. She was still dressed in what she’d worn to dinner the previous night.
“Sleep well?” he asked, although the wrinkled clothing and mussed hai
r spoke for themselves.
“I’m starving,” she said without preamble and grabbed a piece of bacon.
“I’m going to start loading up the truck. I figure it’s best we head out early and get your things moved over to my place tonight. I have to work tomorrow.”
Her eyes held a wariness that hadn’t been there when she first walked in.
“You have an extra bedroom, right?”
“Yes. With your name next to a little star right on the door.”
She shook her head gave him a derisive twist of her lips, but said nothing.
Lucky took his time loading the truck with his things and the extra food he’d brought. The fresh mountain air did him good and helped to clear his thoughts. He’d done little sleeping the night before, thinking about the question she’d asked him at the waterfall.
Do you love me?
He figured she’d asked that because she knew it would be like a bucket of ice over him. It had certainly worked. Ten fold.
But then there was the brave way she’d tried to escape him so he wouldn’t see her tears. The moment he’d held her against him as she cried, he knew he was in trouble. He’d comforted many crying women in his profession, some who’d cried because of him, but none had elicited such a feral desire to make everything right in their world like Lana had.
So, during the night, he’d thought about that one question and realized he was in trouble. No, he didn’t love her. But he could.
That scared him nine ways to Sunday. He didn’t want to put himself on the line to be broken again. He wouldn’t. Not even for Lana.
So, he would be indifferent. Stop trying to win her over. Play the nice guy and let their marriage be the business arrangement it was intended to be. No more comforting, no more kisses, no more thoughts of getting her in bed.
Just as Lucky had realized last night, he had everything he’d ever wanted. If James found out they were married, he’d be livid. No doubt his nemesis would remember the words he’d said to Lucky all those years ago and realize the loser was actually himself.
So, in the tradition of masculine dominance, Lucky had won. He had Lana. She belonged to him now. No sense in adding convoluted emotions to the mix. And even though he hesitated to admit it, Lana was right to deny making love to him. Women had a hard time distinguishing love from lust, and he didn’t want to have to explain it to her down the road when things ended.
“What are you thinking about?” her soft voice came from behind him.
Spinning around, he saw she’d showered and her long hair hung in damp ringlets against the swell of her breasts. He swallowed down his desire and moved past her.
“Just pondering the meaning of life,” he joked, trying to avoid the question.
“Ah, I see.” She followed him up the steps of the cabin and slipped her hand into his. When he tried to go in, she tugged so he stopped.
“Are you okay?”
Her soft voice, combined with the heady scent of her shampoo, as well as the pure beauty she radiated, made him angry. He didn’t want to feel this way again. He would not succumb to her charms a second time in his life.
“I’m fine,” he said and twisted his hand out of hers. He turned before he could see her face fall and entered the cabin. “Do you have everything packed up?”
“Yes.”
He walked into the bedroom and saw she’d neatly placed everything on the end of her bed. Just hours before, he’d sat right where her suitcase was, rubbing the tension away from her legs and feet, thinking about how incredible she was.
Reality was about to come back and bite him in the butt when they returned to town. They’d have gossips to deal with, not to mention the people who were genuinely happy for them. Their lives were about to be turned upside down. He knew without question he’d be there to help her through it, but he couldn’t let her get as close as she had been before.
He grabbed up her luggage and stalked outside with it, throwing it in his truck.
“You ready?” he called to her where she sat on the porch swing.
“I am. I’ll grab my purse and lock up.”
He waited in the truck. It only took her a few minutes and soon she sat next to him, her feminine scent filling the cab, driving him crazy.
“I think I want the windows down on the drive home; is that okay with you?”
Lana said nothing, but rather pushed the button for the window to go down.
Thank goodness for small miracles.
*****
Back in the security of her real home, Ally grilled Lana about what had happened over the last forty-eight hours. Lana didn’t give her much detail other than the fact they had not slept together.
“Hallelujah! I thought you’d let Mr. Muscles in there seduce you.”
“Do I look like an idiot?” Lana shot at her, shoving her clothes in a big suitcase.
“No, but I know when handsome men like him are involved, women tend to lose their minds.”
Lana pointed at her head. “Still intact.”
“Good.”
Ally silently worked beside her, folding each item of clothing from Lana’s drawers carefully while Lana threw them in.
“How long do you think this will last?” Ally asked quietly.
“Until no one wonders if the baby is James’. You haven’t told anyone, have you?”
“No.”
“Not even Jesse or Michael?”
“You know Jesse is away at college. I barely talk to him anymore.”
“That’s a shame. You should go see him.”
“In New York? No thank you. I’d rather not be responsible for Daddy’s first heart attack. You getting married again is enough for him right now.”
“Maybe in a few months.”
“He’ll be home next summer. I’ll see him then.”
Lana kept quiet about Jesse. It was a sore spot for Ally, and despite the fact that she was dating Michael now, she knew her baby sister was so deeply in love with her childhood best friend that she probably didn’t even realize it.
“Need any help in here?” Lucky asked, poking his head in the door.
“You can get the clothes out of my closet. I’m about finished with everything else.”
Ally stepped aside as Lucky carried an armful of clothing out of the room. Her eyes were suspiciously bright.
“What is it?” Lana asked.
“I feel like I just got you back and now you’re leaving again.”
“I’m sorry.” Lana took her hand and squeezed. “I don’t trust my own judgment, but I’m pretty sure Lucky won’t stop me from seeing you the way James did. You’ll hardly know I’m gone. From what he’s told me, he works pretty long hours at the station.”
“I hope he makes you happy. A part of me wants him to be your knight in shining armor, but another part of me hopes a certain part of his anatomy falls off.”
Lana chuckled. “I don’t think he’s a knight in shining armor, but I don’t think he’s a terrible guy either. Most men wouldn’t have even offered to do what he did.”
“Unless they wanted something in return,” Ally agreed.
Lana didn’t tell her sister that she was dead on in her assumption. It didn’t really matter now that things were done.
Lucky silently entered and grabbed another armload of her clothes. “We’ve already got some well wishers stopping by. We’re accumulating some wedding gifts in the cab of the truck.”
“How nice.”
“I already have a toaster,” he snapped.
Unable to make out his mood, she just smiled pleasantly. “Maybe it’s a big screen TV.”
“I already have one of those, too.” At his own words, he shot the girls a chagrined look and shrugged. “I’ve been a bachelor for thirty years, what do you expect?”
Shaking her head, Lana followed him to the car. Her dad followed on her heels having stayed out of the way until now.
“Honey?” he called and she turned, waiting. “Lucky means well. Be a good
wife to him.”
Lana tried not to cringe. She didn’t want to be a good wife. She didn’t want to be a wife at all.
“Thanks, Daddy.” But she wasn’t sure what she was thanking him for, the advice or the reminder that her life was never going to be normal.
“He’ll make that grandson of mine a fine father.”
Lana’s hands went to her stomach. “It’s a girl.” She didn’t need an ultrasound to confirm what she already knew.
Daddy just smiled knowingly. “Regardless, he’s going to make a good father. I hope you see in him what I see.”
“We’re married, Daddy. If I don’t see it now, I’m sure I will eventually.”
He was silent for a long while then he pulled her into a bear hug. She heard his telltale sniff, and her eyes misted.
“Your mother would have loved him,” he whispered.
Mist turned into full-fledged tears, and they spilled before she could stop them.
“Don’t get too attached. He’s just protecting me. We don’t love each other.”
When he pulled away, his sad eyes looked into hers earnestly. “But don’t rule that possibility out. You might surprise each other.”
Lana shook her head. “I don’t think so, but I know you want me to be happy. I think Lucky intends to take good care of me.”
“I sure do,” he announced, walking up to them and looping his heavy arm around her shoulders. He even kissed her temple for good measure. Lana thought he might have laid it on a little thick, but she kept quiet. “Ready to go?”
Inhaling a shaky breath, Lana said, “As ready as I’ll ever be.”
Lucky extended his free hand to her father. “Mr. Roche, sir, you’re always welcome at my house. Come by any time.”
Daddy nodded and shook his hand. “Same here, son. Don’t be a stranger. Either one of you.”
Ally threw her arms around Lana and squeezed. “We have lots to do to get ready for that baby. I better get to help decorate her room.” A daring look was shot Lucky’s way, and the twinkle in his eyes told Lana he found her younger sister amusing.
Lucky for Her Page 10