by Renee LaRuse
She had been feeling better lately. She still couldn't sleep but she was getting used to the physical symptoms of her grief. She hardly noticed the soreness of her limbs and her eyes now stayed dry because she was all cried out. Sydney watched as Hannah’s short attention span went from a candy bar, to examining her nails, to smiling devilishly at a can of whipped topping she was buying, to looking at Josh.
“Hello sexy bag boy. You’re new aren’t you? I’ve never seen you here before?”
Josh was flabbergasted.
“I see that your name is Josh. Hi Josh, I’m Hannah. What do you do for fun?”
“Um, homework?” Josh looked over at Sydney with wide pleading eyes.
Sydney watched as Ho-ish Hannah’s hand went up to squeeze Josh’s skinny bicep. “It must take a strong boy to lift all these heavy groceries all day.”
Josh squirmed away from her grasp and pushed the bridge of his glasses up. Sydney watched in horror as Hannah moved closer and closer to Josh, the flotation devices on her chest threatening to run into him. Sydney reached over and smacked Hannah hard on the shoulder.
“Owww!”
“Sorry Hannah…Thought I saw a mosquito.” Sydney struggled to stop herself from laughing. It was the first time in a while that she truly felt like laughing.
Hannah glared and rolled her eyes at Sydney. Then she turned back to Josh. “So, what are you doing later?”
“Uh, Ma’am, I’m sixteen years old.” Josh protested.
“And…?”
“And I’m not interested.”
Hannah raised an eyebrow. “Oh.” She paid for her groceries and angrily pushed her cart out of the store.
Sydney laughed and gave Josh a high-five. “That was hilarious! ‘And…I’m not interested’!” Sydney impersonated Josh.
Josh laughed. “’Sorry, I thought I saw a mosquito’,” Josh repeated.
Even though Sydney was being silly with Josh, in the back of her mind she was thinking of all the times she'd laughed with Gavin. They went on making fun of Hannah until Josh saw a customer approach. “Okay, Sydney. Customer.”
Sydney turned. “Gavin!” she gasped. Before Sydney could get another word out Gavin leaned over the counter and kissed her. Josh made a wolf whistle. Sydney didn’t hear it. She was on a higher plane of existence, that’s how good the kiss was. When they broke away Sydney was crying. She’d missed him so much. “You’re going to get me fired,” Sydney blubbered. She had thought she was all cried out, but maybe it was the sad tears that had run out. These tears were pure happiness.
She noticed the darkness under Gavin's tired eyes. His eyes were tired but he gave her his beautiful smile. His smile alone made her weak in the knees. He hadn't been getting much sleep either. Then, he felt the same way, she thought. Just like her, he'd felt like a piece was missing. Maybe he did need her after all. Maybe she really was right for him, though she made her mistakes. If she could do it all over again, she would have made it clear in the very beginning that she didn’t see children in her future. Then she never would have hurt him the way she had.
Gavin grinned as he ran around to the other side of the register where Sydney was standing and got down on one knee. “Oh no!” Sydney cried into her hands which were over her mouth.
Gavin pulled out the ring from his pocket. It was the three stoned platinum engagement ring with princess-cut diamonds. “I’m going to try this again,” Gavin chuckled, “Sydney I love you and I want to live the rest of my life with you. I don’t care about the white picket fence and the 2.5 children. I understand now and I don’t need that. Please, Sydney. Marry me.”
“Gavin, are you sure? You want a family. You should have that! I want you to be happy!”
“We could have a hamster, or a dog or something. I don’t care!”
Sydney laughed through her tears.
“All I need is you, Sydney. All I want is you. Please say yes.”
Sydney paused, searching Gavin’s eyes to be sure he was telling the truth, trying to find a reason to say no. She couldn’t. She was scared out of her mind and nervous but that's how it is. Love feels crazy and it feels right, all at the same time. He's done his best to keep every promise, every pinky promise they'd made. He'd offered his shoulders to bear some of her worries from the beginning and he was sure where she found herself scared and unsure. He's never left her. He's never lied to her. He said she was all he wanted and that was the truth. He loved her. He loved her. What more could she ask for? What more was there to know? What the hell else was there to think over? Seriously!
“Yes,” Sydney breathed. “Yes, I’ll marry you.”
Gavin slid the ring on her finger, stood up and hugged Sydney tight. After many sweet kisses, they walked out of the store arm in arm with Josh seeing them off, caroling the wedding march.
* * *
“Yes, Mom, it’s beautiful down here. Gavin and I are having a great time…No, I haven’t seen any thugs hanging around the resort.” Gavin laughed from where he was standing in the bathroom combing his hair in the mirror. “I know tourists are targets. I promise we’ll be careful…Yes, Mom…Mom? I think Liz is calling on the other line. I’ll call you back later, okay?...I love you too. Bye…Hello?...Hey girl!...What? No! I can’t tell you the details. Gavin’s standing two feet away from me!...No!...I’m not telling you that right now!....Okay fine. It was really, really good. Ha ha!...Oh, it is so beautiful down here in Montego Bay, Liz. There are sand dollars everywhere!...Okay…Let me go back to enjoying my honeymoon, already!...Love you. Tell Evan and Sara I said hi….Okay, I will. Bye.”
I hung up the phone. “Liz and Mom said hi,” I called to the bathroom.
“Okay,” Gavin replied.
I walked through the French doors and outside. I stepped around the Jacuzzi that was part of our honeymoon suite. I neared the Hibiscus bush and picked the prettiest orange and pink flower I saw. It would match my pink coral halter dress. I placed the flower behind my ear and smiled as I looked out at the view of the pristine white sand and the water, blue and green like some precious gem. I’d dreamt about this not so long ago. It seemed a silly immature daydream then. Already I was living a dream. How freakin' amazing is that!
I went back into the room and tied the cowry shell necklace around my neck, then slipped my anklet on, the one made of tiny bells. I looked into the big mirror on the white bamboo dresser and saw Gavin come up behind me.
Gavin kissed me on the shoulder. “Are you ready to go walk on the beach, Mrs. Caselle?”
I met his green eyes in the mirror and nodded. “I like that hat. You should let me borrow it some time,” I smiled. Gavin was wearing a straw fedora with a black band around it that looked great on him because of his black hair. His green shirt was completely unbuttoned, his torso exposed. I turned around and slid my hands down the smooth warm skin of his firm stomach and around into the back pockets of his khaki shorts. I pulled him close.
“Are you hungry?” Gavin said after giving me a delicious kiss.
“I could eat.”
“Let’s go to the Beach Grill.”
I grabbed my camera and slipped on my flip flops and we headed out the door. The two of us walked down the sandy shore to the bar and grill, me picking up sand dollars every once in a while and Gavin sneaking glances and kisses every once in a while. We didn’t have to say a word to each other. We just relished the ‘rightness’, as Gavin would put it, of being together in paradise.
The restaurant was painted a tropical green color, had a palm grass thatched roof and inside people were eating, enjoying drinks, and dancing to the reggae music. We decided to join in and do some dancing as well.
“Excuse me,” I called to a passing waitress, “Could you take some pictures of us dancing, please?”
“No problem,” said the waitress with her smooth Jamaican accent. She handed the camera to the waitress. The camera flashed as Gavin and I danced close, smiling at each other, my arms around his neck and his arms around my waist. Gavin gri
nned, put a hand up on top of his straw fedora, leaned in and kissed me, his wife Sydney. As I melted into the joy of his lips against mine, the brilliant light of the camera flashed again.
* * * * * * * * * *
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