by Sadie Carter
“That’s good. I can pretend to be wiped out.” It would give him less chance to hurt her. She hoped.
“And how would you get her to the exchange, as small as Lucy she is, you can’t just carry her like a toddler,” Rye pointed out. “And you’ll need someone to protect your back.”
“One of the others can come with me. Maybe Tae, his brother is one of the warriors Mortef is holding prisoner, right? He can be bitter at Darac’s decision.”
“That is well and good. But this is not happening. I refuse to allow it.”
Thor paced back and forth across the room. He refused to allow Lucy to go ahead with her plan. Put his foot down, as she liked to say. Although that made no sense since both feet were on the floor.
Yet somehow, after hours of arguing, going through every other possible idea or scenario, they were still stuck on her original plan. They’d all decided to have a break and regroup later so Thor had followed Lucy back to her quarters.
“I did not agree to this.” He glanced over at Lucy where she sat on the sofa watching him worriedly. Her legs were tucked up underneath her.
“Thor, I can do this.”
He shook his head and kept pacing.
“You don’t believe in me.”
He stilled, facing her again. He heard the note of hurt in her voice and couldn’t accept that. He moved to her, slipping onto his knees in front of her. So close, he caught a hint of her scent. Light and delicious. His heart sped, a need he had no words to describe enslaved him and for a moment all he could do was stare into those pale blue eyes. Then, reaching out, he clasped her face between his hands.
“I believe in you. I know you believe yourself to be a coward, but offering to walk back into the face of your nightmare, that is the bravest thing I have ever heard.”
“I haven’t done it yet,” she joked.
“But it is madness. I cannot lose you.”
“You won’t, Thor. He wants me back. Alive. To help him in his mad desire to take over the bleedin’ universe.”
“Why does he need you when that Beau can track through scent?”
“Because she can only track once she’s caught someone’s scent. And the scent has to be recent. I didn’t notice her when I first saw him in the palace but she must have been there or close by.” She frowned.
“What is it?”
“I lost a piece of my dress going out the window. I’m guessing that’s how she tracked me. She’s definitely getting stronger. But I can track from long distances. And I can sense how many people are in a certain place. When Thorac’s army came for us, I could tell him exactly how many there were and where they were. Do you realize what an advantage that gave him?”
He dropped his hands and grabbed her hands between his. “That was not your fault.”
“No? Somehow it doesn’t feel that way. I feel those lives on my hands. Some of those men had families, children. Their dad’s never came home. Like mine.”
“Because he killed them. Not you. You were his prisoner. You were forced to help him to survive.”
“And right now, he has people like me, people he is forcing to do his will. No doubt they wish they were dead because that’s the only way they can see to escape.”
“Is that how you felt? You wished for death?” He couldn’t understand it. Did not pretend to. He had always been in charge of his own life. He had never been incarcerated, forced to do something abhorrent to him. He did not fully understand the desperation she must have felt. The fear.
“I have to help them, Thor. I can’t be happy. I can’t move on with my life knowing that they are still living like that. Knowing he is still alive. I can’t have any more lives on my hands. I can’t live a happy life if I didn’t at least try to help those people. Mila, Koran and the others were only taken by Husan because of me. I know you’ll tell me it isn’t my fault. But it feels like it is.”
“It is not on you. It is on him.”
He sighed. “I cannot believe I am agreeing to this.”
“But you are?”
“You will come back to me.”
“I will. I swear it.”
“After this, no risks. I put my foot down. I will protect you. Take care of you.”
“Trust me, I am not going to do anything to put myself at risk. For the first time in a long time, I want to see what the future will bring. I promise, I’ll sit back and grow fat letting you look after me. Well, Willa wants to whip me into shape, she reckons I’m too bony and that I need some muscle. But I promise, I really don’t want to risk myself. I’ll live a nice, safe life on Zerconia. As your mate. If you still want me.”
“Still want you? I want you more than anything in this universe. There would never be a circumstance in which I would not want you.”
“Even if I killed someone? I mean, maybe I have some weird fetish or I’m a serial nose picker.”
He smiled. “I believe I would have noticed that. I see you. I have always seen you. You are brave, caring and kind. No matter what, I will always want you.”
“Now that’s commitment. Not sure I’d want you if your finger was permanently up your nose.”
He raised his eyebrows, trying to look stern even though from her smile he could tell she was joking. “Really? I fail to see how that would not be attractive to you.”
“Ooh, was that you making a joke? And I thought you Zerconians had no sense of humor.” She grinned at him and he loved to see a smile on her face. She always appeared so serious and worried.
“I would chase you to the ends of the universe, Lucy. There is nowhere I would not go for you. If you need me, wards or no wards, I will be there. This is not our ending. It is our beginning.”
Tears filled her eyes, making them glisten under the lights. “Wow, didn’t realize you guys did romantic, either.”
“It is simply the truth. I have waited for you. Dreamed of you. Longed for you. No one will tear you from me.”
“Bet you never dreamed finding your mate would be this complicated, huh?”
“Complicated is fine. Impossible is not even a possibility. We will be together.” He wiped a thumb over her cheek, catching a tear. “I know you are not ready for us join but would you allow me to hold you as you sleep? I give you my word it will go no further. I will even sleep over the covers.”
She nodded. “Yeah, I think I’d like that.”
Lucy watched nervously as Thor approached the bed. They’d just had word that Willa had made contact with Husan and he’d fell for the bait. They were going to meet up in twelve hours on Torra. Part of her wanted to change her mind. She didn’t want to do this. She’d had her fingertips on what could be a life for herself.
But it wouldn’t be a life if she didn’t try to save the others. She already had so much blood on her hands. Not that she had physically killed someone, but she had helped Husan kill hundreds. That weighed on her. She couldn’t take any more lives on her hands.
Now, she had less than twelve hours with Thor. Was she going to waste them cuddling? If she was brave enough to take on Husan then she was brave enough to take this next step with Thor. She trusted him. She thought he was the most gorgeous, sexy man she had ever seen. She wanted him so much that she ached.
“This is still okay?” he asked, hesitating on the other side of the bed. “Or would you prefer I slept in the other room? I would like to stay close but I understand if this is too fast for you.”
Too fast? Eighteenth century courtships probably moved faster than the two of them. No doubt the Duke would have felt up the pretty damsel in distress by now.
“I’m tired of being the damsel in distress,” she muttered.
Thor took a step back. “You are in distress? I will leave.”
“No!” she said sharper than she’d intended to be. “No. I want you to stay. And I don’t want you to sleep on top of the covers.”
Thor looked puzzled but he stepped forward and sat facing her on the masic. “You wish me to sleep under the covers?”
“Yes,�
�� she said firmly, pleased that there was no wobble in her voice. This is what she wanted and she was god damn going to take it.
“What is a damsel in distress?” Thor asked as he climbed under the covers.
“Someone who has to be rescued. Me, for most of my life. Ricardo rescued me first, or at least I thought he did. Then Rye. Now you.”
“Me? What did I rescue you from?”
“Myself, mostly. Sounds silly, huh?”
Reaching over he took hold of her hand, unclenching it. “You are hurting yourself.”
She looked down at the red crescents on her palms where her nails had left imprints. She couldn’t even feel them. “Believe me, I’ve thought about doing much worse to myself.”
He tipped her chin up, turning her head so she was forced to look into his serious eyes. “What do you mean? You wished yourself harm?”
“I wished myself dead.” She let out a sharp laugh. “God, death was a fantasy. A dream. But I was too much of a coward to take it.”
“That does not make you a coward. You are a survivor.”
“Oh no, I’m pretty certain I’m a coward. I still want to be that damsel in distress waiting for the knight to save her. I want to sit back and let you and the others take the risks. Because I’m really scared. See, coward?”
“There is nothing cowardly about fear.”
“Yeah? I bet you’ve never been afraid of anything in your life.”
“Actually, I fear many things. Losing those I love is the thing I fear most. Letting others down. Making a mistake and causing someone’s death. Losing you. That is what I fear most.”
“Ditto.” At his puzzled look she explained, “I mean same here. Losing you scares me. You’ve become very important to me in a very short time. For the first time I have a shot at happiness and I want to take it. It’s so close it scares me how easily it could be taken away. I have to do this, though. Even though it scares me to death. For your people, for the others he holds in misery. For our future because I can’t live happy ever after until this chapter is closed.”
“I understand. I do not like it though. You said I saved you, but I have done nothing.”
“Yes, you have. You’re the one who brought happiness into my life. I was living but it was half a life. I didn’t interact, I didn’t trust, I didn’t really laugh. I tried not to trust in case I was let down. You brought all of that back for me. Without those things what’s the point of living?”
He caressed her face. “In some ways I feel the same. You are my everything. Which is why I cannot believe I am allowing you to risk yourself.”
“Allowing?” she grinned at him. “Them there’s fighting words.”
“Allowing,” he repeated. “I have fantasised of picking you up, climbing into an escape shuttle and getting out of here.”
“I’d feel the same. Thank you for understanding.”
“I do not feel very understanding. I have done nothing but watch you place yourself in danger this last week. That will stop very soon.”
“I promise. I will be happy to live the most boring, safest life possible.” She glanced away into the distance. “I just never stood up to him before, you know? I sat back and let him do horrible things and I didn’t say a word.”
“Would anything have changed if you had spoken up?” Thor asked her.
“No. He’d probably have just beaten me and gone on his happy way murdering and pillaging and torturing.”
“Then you should not feel guilty over that.”
“But I do. I feel a tremendous amount of guilt. Over those he beat. Over those he killed. We have to help them, Thor.”
“We will. You will. I am proud of you.”
“You are?” She stared up at him.
Thor nodded. “Yes. Because you are scared but you are doing what you believe is right. Even against my wishes.”
“Has no one ever gone against your wishes before?” she teased.
“Dex and Koran, plenty of times. It never worked out well for them, of course.”
“Oh, of course.”
“Are you being sarcastic?”
“Yes.”
His face grew mock-stern. “No mocking your mate. That comes with a harsh penalty.”
“Ooh, I’m so scared. What will you do? Lock me up? Beat me? Spank me?” Oh hell, where had that last suggestion come from? She was not the least bit kinky in the bedroom. Ricardo had wanted to try all sorts of things that she’d refused to even contemplated. It should have been a red flag to his true nature when he would storm out of his house in a rage after her refusal.
“Hmm, well, spanking you is a meritous suggestion.”
She waggled her finger at him. “Don’t even think about it.”
“But I think this time I shall just tickle you.” He attacked without further warning. His fingers seemingly everywhere at once as she laughed and shrieked. Good Lord, she was ticklish in places she’d never thought possible. She thrust her arms out, trying to get away from him. Drawing her legs up to protect herself she stilled, freezing in horror as Thor let out a pained groan and rolled to his side.
“Thor?”
“I just need a moment.” A grimace crossed his face.
“I am so sorry. I didn’t mean it. Is it really sore?”
“It is fine.” He managed to lower his legs from where he had been curled up in the fetal position. “I suppose it is for the best we are not joining tonight.”
“Umm, about that.” Her heart raced as she stared at him. Having his hands on her had heated her blood, making her pussy ache with the need to feel him inside her, filling her. “What if I did want to join?”
He raised his eyebrows. “You are ready for that? I do not want to pressure you.”
“Thor, pretty sure you’re the most patient man I’ve ever met. Not to mention the hottest. I just, I mean, do you…oh crap, I’m not good at this sort of stuff.”
“Stuff?”
“Sex. I’m crap at sex.”
“Crap at sex?”
“No good. Useless. Boring. Frigid—”
He placed his hand over her mouth. “Stop. No more.”
“Sorry, guess I’m not really selling myself here, huh? Just wanted to warn you what you’re getting yourself in for. I’m pretty unadventurous as well.”
“Who told you those things?”
“Ricardo. He’s the only man I ever slept with.”
“Not Mortef?”
“Eww, like I’d sleep with him.” It finally dawned on her. “Oh, you think Husan raped me? No, I’ve never been violated, not sexually. I wouldn’t put it past him, but I’m pretty sure he swings the other way.”
“What does swinging have to do with anything?”
“It’s a saying. It means he enjoys men not women. One thing to be grateful for at least. Is that why you wanted to go slow? You thought I’d been raped?”
“It had occurred to me. I also wished for you to trust me. To want this as much as I do.”
“I do. Trust you. And want you.” She blushed bright red. “I hope you enjoy it. With me.”
“There is no question of that.”
She lowered her gaze. She thought there was every possibility. Thor tipped her head up and she gazed into his red eyes. “If I ever track this Ricardo down, I will make him pay for the things he has done.”
“Yeah, I’ll help you kick his butt.”
“You did not enjoy joining with him because he was not me.”
She snorted with laughter then took in his face. Uh oh, he was completely serious. Well, then….
“Is that right?”
He nodded arrogantly. “It is. It is up to me to ensure you experience complete rapture at my hands.”
“Rapture, huh? That’s a pretty strong word.”
“It is.” He moved closer, his hard body pressing against hers. Her mouth went dry and she swallowed heavily. Had she seriously thought this was a good idea? His gaze turn amber as his cock pressed against her thigh, heavy and hard. Her p
ussy clenched and she licked her dry lips.
“Are you sure you’re up to this?”
“Oh, I assure you. I am up.”
Her eyes widened. “Was that a joke?”
“No joke. Would you like to see?”
Standing, he stripped before she could protest. Hell, who was she kidding, she was never going to protest. She’d been dying to see him since the first day she’d met him. The man was her every day dream brought to life.
Except she’d never imagined that.
“You’re huge.”
“Thank you,” he said proudly.
She hadn’t exactly meant it as a compliment. But men were sensitive about penis size. At least Ricardo always had been.
But then, he’d been tiny compared to Thor. Like comparing sausages to toothpicks. Sitting, she forced her gaze from his hard, erect cock up his chest. Wide and thick with muscle, she could scarcely believe just how gorgeous he was.
Breath-taking.
And so out of her league.
“Maybe we should do this with the lights off,” she suggested.
“You do not like what you see?”
“Oh, me like. Me like a lot.” Now she couldn’t even speak properly. Get your act together, Lucy. “I mean, you’re hot. Extremely hot. I just think, well, I’d be less shy if we turned the lights off.”
Thor nodded. “Lights low.”
The lights dimmed. It wasn’t completely dark, but dark enough to unclench the knot in her stomach.
“You are certain you want to do this? We can still wait.”
Oh man, could he be more perfect? Seriously?
“I don’t want to wait. But I understand if you do. If something happens to me, and we’re mated it could be dangerous for you.” It had weighed on her mind. There was more than just her life at stake, especially if they were mated.
Her breath caught as he grabbed her, pulling her onto his lap. She sat facing him, her legs straining to straddle his wide thighs, her pussy snug up against his hot cock.
“Nothing will happen to you. Nothing.” He drew her into him and took her mouth with his. Rockets of fire exploded in her blood. Music flowed through her, happy and upbeat. When he drew back, they were both breathing heavily and his gaze was pure amber.