When dawn broke the next morning, Rai didn't notice, she was so engrossed in the journal. She heard, rather than saw, Jesse approach the bar where she sat.
"Morning, Rai. I won't even ask what sort of vile things you're writing about me in there."
Rai laughed. "I'm afraid I'm too busy trying to figure me out to write about much of anyone else."
"I hear you. Ponar leave?"
"Yes, about an hour ago. I heard one of the wagons leave, so I can only assume it was him."
"Everything good between you two?"
Rai pursed her lips. "I still feel bad about what happened."
"He'll get over it. You both will. I've never known him to hold grudges. Oh, I almost forgot." Jesse held out a small bag.
"What's this?" asked Rai, taking it from her.
"Only the finest powdered faown that money can buy. Guaranteed to deliver a restful night's sleep--or in your case, a restful day's sleep. It even suppresses dreams."
Rai looked the bag over. "I appreciate the thought, Jesse, but you know about my experience with medicinals. What if this has some kind of side effect only the Temple understands?"
Jesse laughed. "Oh no, you won't find this in any Temple I know of. I get faown from a special vendor."
"I thought only the Temples distributed medicinals?"
"People medicine, yes. This is formulated for horses." Rai shot her a dubious look. "Faown is an animal sedative, but it's perfectly safe for humans. We've all used it from time to time here at the Waystation, what with the odd hours we work. Trust me; this stuff should be just the ticket for you."
"Look, I believe you when you say it's safe for me to take, and I do appreciate it. The nightmares I've been having ... I don't think they're random, Jesse. In fact, I think they're clues to my past. Something happened to me, or something I did, before I became a Durmah."
Jesse pondered this. "Intriguing." She pocketed the faown. "So you think these nightmares have some use after all?"
"Believe me; I'd rather not have to endure them. If there's even a chance, they might help me to remember who I am. Then yeah, I'm stuck trying to figure them out," Rai replied.
"So what happens in these nightmares?"
Rai described the nightmares to Jesse. She was surprised how comforting it was to have someone to confide in.
"And you have no idea who the people chasing you are?" Jesse asked.
"No, there are no faces. It's maddening, because I have no way of knowing if they're people from my past, or from the Temple after I woke up, or just unknown strangers."
"Perhaps the next time you have that dream, you should try focusing on who's coming after you, and see if you recognize them?" Jesse said.
"I'll try that, but it is a dream. I'm not sure how much control I'll have," Rai said. Still, Jesse's idea held merit. If she could overcome the fear in the dream to run, perhaps she could see who was chasing her.
Rai yawned, and Jesse chuckled. "Looks like all this dream talk is getting to you. You'd better turn in."
"I'll do that," Rai replied. As tired as she was, she was nevertheless apprehensive about the dreams that may come to her.
"Oh, I almost forgot, Hilse's on duty tonight, so you've got a night free. However, I do have a small errand for you after you sleep."
"What's that?"
"There's a weavers Sept on the far end of town, the Torers. I want you to check in with them and see if they've completed the order for our new blankets. I figured that would give you an excuse to learn more of the town."
"Perfect," Rai said. "Have a good morning."
"I'll be here. Sweet dreams sis," Jesse said. "Ah, on second thought, just try not to break anything in your room, Okay?"
Rai rolled her eyes and kept her comments to herself.
*
Rai was up and dressed before she even realized her sleep had been free of nightmares. As much as she detested the nightmares, Rai was also desperate for any clues they might bring. Frustration tore through her at the lost opportunity and yet she sighed in relief.
Rai returned to the dining room and spotted Jesse in her usual alcove poring over a large piece of parchment holding a full-color map of Az'Unda. A superb hand had etched the coastlines, spines, cities, towns, rivers, bays and forests with intricate detail.
"Sleep well?" Jesse asked.
Rai pulled up a chair next to Jesse. "I did, for once. What's with the map?"
"Your dream got me thinking about forests, and I decided to get an idea of where some of the major ones are. Most of what passes for forests around here are little more than heavily-wooded swamps, but this one caught my eye." Jesse pointed to a forest area on the map, near the town of Barrow's Grove.
"Why that one?" Rai asked. She was intrigued at the idea of pinpointing the location of her dream. "You think my dream happened in this forest?"
Jesse nodded. "Many travelers have described the trees here as huge. I don't know that they're the size of the ones in your dream, but they're colossal by the sound of it."
"But we don't even know if the forest from my dream is real. It could just a metaphor for an unknown scary place."
"It's possible, but I can't shake the idea that these nightmares are trying to tell you something. Especially for someone like you, who has had no memories before a month ago. This is just absurd, and it has the Temple written all over it. Or the Guardians. Or both."
"Speaking of the Temple, you never did tell us about your visit to the Healers. Hilse and I were worried about you." Rai said.
"You and everyone else," Jesse said with a smirk. "You should have seen the look on people's faces as the Guardian and I walked to the hospice. They thought the Plague had gotten me for sure. It was rather touching."
"So, what happened when you got there?" asked Rai.
"Trust me, not a lot. He had me wait at the entrance while he whispered something with the Healers. They were distant toward me after that, even for Temple Healers. Then the Guardian left and I haven't seen him since."
"That had to be a relief. I swear, there's something that bothers me about that man," Rai said.
"I can't argue with you there. I feel that way about all of the Guardians," Jesse said.
"Yeah, but this is something different, I just can't quite put my finger on it, but he irritates me," Rai said. "Anyway, what happened then?"
"Well, they stuck me in this tiny, windowless room, alone, for at least an hour. Eventually this kid comes in--an Apprentice by the look of him--and has me drink a cup of this thick, dark, nasty-tasting brew. He then he tells me it'll knock me out a while, but that my flu would be cured when I wake up."
Rai thought of the medicinals that the Temple had given her and their effect on her olfactory sense. She wondered, with more than a little discomfort, what other things that dark brew might have done to Jesse.
"Within maybe ten or fifteen minutes I'd fallen asleep on this little cot they'd provided. I couldn't have kept my eyes open if I tried. Next thing I know some Healer is waking me up, telling me its morning and that I'm free to go."
"That must have been a little scary," Rai said.
"Oh, it gets better. I asked her if the flu was cured, and she said 'Well, we wouldn't let you leave if you were still a threat to the populace' and then turns and walks away, as if I'm some sort of idiot!"
Rai stared aghast at her. "Well, that's not what I expected. Remember the Healer I mentioned back at Raven's Call, Mala? She was nothing but sweet and kind to me. I'd never imagine that a Healer could behave so coldly toward their patients."
"All I know is it's a pity that I don't have nightmares like you do, that way I could have gotten away with smacking this Healer upside the head when she woke me up."
Rai burst out laughing, and was genuinely relieved that Jesse could come away from a Temple experience, any Temple experience, and joke about it.
"Look, I'm telling you it was nothing. I'm still the same old Jesse, and I'm still your boss. I'm ordering you to get out
of here and go see the town!" said Jesse, mock concern knitting her brows while her eyes sparkled mischievously. "You've been at the Waystation for two days straight, and you need a break."
Rai sighed, giving into Jesse's enthusiasm. "You did mention that earlier. Where's this Torer's Sept?"
"Here are the directions." Jesse handed Rai an abbreviated map of the city, which she studied and then folded, and placing it into her pocket.
Focusing back on the map, Rai considered the possibility of her dream being from a real place. She made a mental note to keep her journal at her bedside, so when the nightmare recurred she could write everything down while it was still fresh in her memory. Perhaps that way she'd be able to remember some landmarks or faces from the dream.
"Speaking of maps, what's the name of that forest, anyway?" Rai asked.
"It's an odd one. Harper's Sorrow," Jesse replied.
"How far is it?" Rai asked.
"Oh, about two days out of Barrow's Grove, though you'd have to cross the Gorath Spine, so it could take longer. I'm afraid I don't know anything about that passage. Also, Barrow's Grove is about a week from here, so it'd take say, eight or nine days each way," Jesse mused.
"Hmm, somehow I doubt Kait wants me, a newly inducted adoptee, and the only other Durmah here to help you, running off for a few weeks on a wild frendar chase!"
Jesse pursed her lips. "True enough. You're correct to assume she'd have to authorize the journey. Right now the only Durmah who travels between here and Barrow's Grove is Ponar, and somehow I think you might want to wait a little while before taking a trip with him."
"Eh, you think it might happen?" Rai asked.
"Sure, if Kait agrees, and if I can spare you around here, and if Ponar's willing to risk the journey. It's more dangerous to travel off the normal trade routes."
Rai shook her head. "I'm sorry Jesse. I just arrived and here I am talking about running off into the far reaches. I hope you know I'm not trying to make things harder on you."
"Don't stress about it for now. I'm sure a time will work out. Now enough! Get outta here! If we chat away the afternoon I'll never get my blankets!"
Rai stood. "Thanks, Jesse. I'll be back before dark." With that, she headed for the stable yard.
She couldn't stop thinking about Jesse's experience at the Temple and why it should be so different from hers. It was as if this Healer had something against Jesse. Was there some kind of history between them? Had Jesse had other altercations with the Kiya's Grace Temple before?
Nothing she'd heard had helped to ease Rai's fears about the Temple and about what occurred within their walls.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Rai walked along a busy street in Kiya's Grace in the warmth of the bright mid-afternoon sun. Jesse had been right. It felt good to be away from the Waystation for a while. Jesse had also warned her that the city was often cloudy and drizzly, but today was a welcome break from the norm. She took in everything, the houses, the shops, and the jewel-toned clothing worn by the many city dwellers who passed by. The Durmah Waystation was located toward the outskirts of the city, but Rai's business was in the center of town.
Rai came upon a park filled with lush grass and dotted with tall, shady trees. At the boundary, a wooden sign read "District 3 Schoolyard." All around children laughed and played, supervised by two adults, apparently schoolteachers. At the far end of the park stood a large, long building, which Rai surmised, was the school. One of the schoolteachers noticed her and approached, stern-faced yet not intimidating. A brief glance up and down the street revealed no other passers-by, so Rai chose to wait for him.
Rai shifted, unsure of what to expect from this stranger. He wore a simple beige tunic and pants under a light orange longvest belted loosely around his waist. Thin and middle aged, flecks of gray peppered his long, black beard and short-cropped scalp.
"Good day, ma'am. What is your business here this fine afternoon?" He glanced down at her left hand, taking in her tattoo, and thus her social status as well. She'd noticed this less at the Waystation, but then, everyone there knew the Durmah women, and their history.
At this distance, she picked up the metallic tinged musk of his scent and thus understood elements of his emotional state. He was protective of the children playing behind him. Was he their teacher? No, he was their headmaster. She needed to reassure him.
"I'm Rai Durmah, of Sept Durmah. I just arrived in town a few days ago. I'm on a Sept errand, and now I'm having a look around this fine town."
His face softened. "Nice to meet you, Mistress Durmah. I'm John, Lead Historian and Headmaster of District Three here in Kiya's Grace, at your service." He extended a hand to her.
Rai grasped it, and his emotions intensified. It was as if she'd focused her eyes on something that had heretofore existed only within her peripheral vision. "And you as well." Rai released his hand, overwhelmed with the intensity.
"I've eaten many fine dinners at the Waystation. It's nice to meet someone who works there in a new setting. You know, if I may be so bold, at times young ladies terms of service to the Temples can disrupt or delay their schooling. We do offer adult education classes for those who have an interest in completing their education."
What level of education had she received? She'd understood most the Temple and Durmah's conversations since her awakening, but just how much education she'd received to a point she had no way of knowing. However, going back to school might jog some memories. The idea intrigued her. However, unlike her episode with Ponar, she decided to think before acting.
"I'm pretty busy with my duties at the Waystation right now, but I'll keep it in mind," Rai replied.
A bell sounded from the school, and the children ran toward its open doors.
"Very well, our doors are always open. Good day." Without waiting for a response, he marched off toward the school.
Rai tried to make sense of what had just happened. There was no denying it now: she could read the thoughts, or at least emotions, of others. A part of her had believed her episode with Ponar was a fluke of some sort, an isolated incident, one related to the intimacy of the moment. This time there was no mistaking what had happened with John. His thoughts had become hers! Or, perhaps she could only read his emotions? Rai wasn't so sure.
About all she did know was that neither Ponar nor John appeared to have sensed that she was reading them. Thank the moons for small favors. Still, she needed more information about this ability of hers.
More practice.
She continued down the street. The park soon gave way to houses, and then shops and businesses. Presently Rai found herself a food market with shops on both sides of the street offering all manner of breads, produce, and sweets. The streets were busier now than they had been when Rai left the Waystation, and every shop had a line of people in front of it. Perfect.
Rai spent the next hour reading people, first one, then another, and then another. With each person she read, she became more and more comfortable with it. She discovered that she could only read surface thoughts, something she'd suspected after her encounter with John. She only knew what the person was thinking at the exact moment of contact, nothing deeper than that. Often she detected the person's overall state of mind--anxious, happy, impatient, angry, or whatever. She learned how to brush against someone as she walked by, so that he or she didn't notice, in order to strengthen her contact with the person.
Most of what she read from people she found dull and mundane, though there were a few entertaining moments. She discovered that a red fruit vendor in the market had his eye on the attractive operator of a fish store across the street. A single moment's touch across the fish hawker's skin informed Rai she didn't reciprocate his interest.
Critically, she'd found no indication from anyone that they recognized she was in contact with them. This had concerned her from the start, so it was a great relief for her to discover that she had nothing to worry about in her empathic snooping.
At dusk Rai decided to ret
urn to the Waystation, not yet interested in wandering about city at night. As she moved through the bustling crowd, she debated whether to tell Jesse about her empathic ability. Jesse was the only one she trusted. She was her senior and her sister within the Sept, and it would be improper to keep secrets of any kind from her. Yet this was more than just a secret--it was a phenomenon, an ability no Az'Un, or human for that matter, should have. What if Jesse felt obligated to tell Kait or other Sept members about it? Rai couldn't take that risk.
Halfway back to the Waystation and before the crowds thinned too much, Rai decided to perform one more foray into the mind of a stranger. The crowds were thick here, making it easy for her to brush her hand up against a random individual. Rai's mind fogged and she was unable to delve into this person's mind as she had the others. To her horror, Rai sensed he not only knew what she was doing, but also seethed over the invasion of his privacy.
"Not everyone appreciates ... intrusions." The words slipped into Rai's mind. The message carried an abrasive, familiar masculine tone.
An intense tingling sensation rolled over her, and she staggered a few feet to a lamppost, and clung to it to steady herself. Her head slowly cleared, and she turned around to get a closer look at the man, but he was already gone, having disappeared into the throng of people. She didn't even remember the last few faces that had passed her by, so she had little hope of remembering his face out of the masses.
Rai's head swam. Did this man have the same empathic ability as hers? If so, how had he blocked her attempt to read him whilst also sending her such a clear a warning laced with malice? A chill of fear ran down her spine. Had he known what she'd been doing in the marketplace too?
Rai looked around one more time, but she didn't notice anyone watching her. At least, no one was staring at her, but she knew that didn't mean anything. Rai wanted to find the man; perhaps he'd answer some questions about her past. Then again, his silent message hadn't been at all friendly either.
The Dream Sifter (The Depths of Memory Book 1) Page 18