Apparently some family members died, but it doesn’t bother me too much if I consider that the dirty money went into raising those people.
It didn’t bother me.
After that, I kidnapped the CEO’s daughter.
I met her as she went home from school, telling her that her father had collapsed. She followed me without a second thought.
You should never get into a car with someone you don’t know. It’s common sense. And foolishly enough, the company never took back my employee ID when they fired me.
Talk about careless. This is exactly why corruption runs rampant. So I decided to teach the CEO this very lesson by using my old ID to earn the girl’s trust. Now they’ll reflect on their half-baked system.
After kidnapping the girl, I talked with the CEO over the phone.
He didn’t need much convincing to see that I was serious. It was the right choice to send him his daughter’s severed fingers and thumbs.
“If you want to kill someone, kill me! M-my daughter has nothing to do with this! I’m the one you want!” He cried.
He had the wrong idea.
I’m no murderer.
I’m not particularly out to get people killed.
I want him to reflect and repent.
What use was there in killing him before that? Killing him would be simply an act of self-satisfaction.
I’m not trying to murder people, I just want to complete the process—I want him to reflect, repent, and fear until the moment he dies.
I mean, sending a laughing madman to the gallows doesn’t wash away his crimes.
Everyone would agree. People like them should be tortured before their deaths so that they suffer and repent.
Everyone would agree. So it must be right. No one would think otherwise.
…In any case, if I wanted to purge the CEO and the company of their wrongdoings and create a wholesome world for the other employees, there had to be punishment. The CEO had to repent.
I let him listen to his daughter die.
He screamed more than she did.
What a relief.
If he’s so concerned about his daughter, it means he’s still not completely inhuman.
Now he’ll give up on his corrupt and unjust ways and give that love to his company.
I did the right thing.
But apparently my sentiments weren’t conveyed properly to the world. I became a wanted man.
If I was caught, I would obviously be judged by the law.
Then that would mean I am evil.
As if.
No. No. That’s not going to happen.
If it did, it would mean I was wrong.
And if I was wrong, what did the CEO’s daughter die for?
A girl dying in vain? Things like that only happen in an unjust world.
So I could not let myself be caught.
I had to be in the right, if only for her sake.
I ran so I could give meaning to her death.
That’s right. I did nothing wrong.
But the world still did not understand—
And as a result, I ended up here.
…?
Wait.
It’s on the tip of my tongue.
Something important. Something so important…
“Hraaagh! Argh! AAAAAAAGH! Stop…stop…”
Shit my mind is synching with my body agaaAAAAAAAHHHHHH—!
It hurts! I can’t think! Fuck! What! The! Hell!
I did the right thing! So…so why?!
“Stop…what did I…do to…”
She was as cold as ever.
“You kill Fei.”
“F-Fei?”
“Fei. White flowers in hair. Like my hair. Last week. You kill Fei.”
At that moment—
Another memory surfaced.
Not one from long ago.
It was last week—
After wandering for a long time, I’d thought I finally found her.
But when I spoke to her, I realized that she had simply been wearing the same hair decorations.
She looked at me strangely. She was adorable, yes, but her eyes looked completely different from the girl I was looking for.
Unable to hide my disappointment, I’d asked her,
“Are those flowers popular on this island?”
“…?
“S-sorry. I was just looking for a girl with the same flowers in her hair.”
Then she suddenly began gesturing.
She seemed to be pointing at herself.
“No, not you. I’m looking for—”
Then she grabbed me by the sleeve and tried to pull me into the alleys.
…!
I came to a realization.
She was trying to trick me.
She would lure—seduce—me into the alleys and steal everything I had, or she would have a group of men ready to do that work for her.
I’ve been fooled enough times on this island. I see right through you.
I was furious.
Each time I was fooled, more anger piled up in my heart.
Maybe it was a side-effect of finally sensing danger before it it me. I lashed out with all my pent-up rage.
When I looked at her, I saw an adorable girl with a still-childlike face. Her eyes were different, but she somehow resembled the girl I was looking for.
That was even more unforgivable.
Dressing just like my angel—trying to fool me into thinking she was her. Trying to defile her.
That’s why this island is hopeless.
Even children like her try to pull the wool over my eyes.
You thought I wouldn’t see through this?
This island is hopeless.
So I will make this island right, I suddenly felt.
For whom? For the girl with the empty eyes, who did not match the rest of the island.
That was why I could not allow an impostor to exist.
I must do the right thing.
Because that’s what I’ve been doing all this time.
So die, you fucking whore.
As the memory hit me, I cried out to the girl.
“W-wait! That ‘Fei’ wouldn’t be…those flowers…the same… URGH!”
The lead pipe shattered my left ribcage.
“You strangled. Your face. On cameras. I asked. Do not tell. Elder Brother. Elder Sister. Volunteer police. Only me.”
“W-wait…”
It was her. The girl on the TV.
I remember breathing a sigh of relief when I realized that the dead girl wasn’t Lilei, but a stranger.
I had no idea.
That was all.
How could I have known that she was her friend?!
The girl didn’t say a word! On this island of lowlifes!
My mind struggled to try and resolve the misunderstanding, but my body reflexively backed away—and soon I was leaning against the low railings at the edge of the rooftop.
“You are not adorable. I kill you.”
“Wait…w-wait. Wait! I-I was just trying to save you!”
All I had were questions—why was she holding a lead pipe? How could she move so inhumanly fast? But there was no time to ponder the answers.
Now that I think about it, I don’t know a thing about this girl.
Really. Why was I so drawn to her?
At that moment, someone grabbed me by the neck.
They yanked me back toward the railings. …In other words, someone had pulled me from beyond the rooftop.
“Hey there.”
It was a familiar voice.
I didn’t have to turn.
I only met him once, but once was enough to burn his image into my mind.
“Thanks for yesterday.”
It’s the psycho in white!
Of all the times… Shit!
“Yakumo. Doing what?” The girl stopped and asked th
e psycho in white.
The psycho named Yakumo replied lazily.
“Oh, well. I was just passing by. But I heard the news. I heard about it all. —And it looks like you did something ridiculous. Of all the people you had to kill, it was her dear friend. The girl she thought of as a sister. It’s ludicrous from any perspective.”
…A dear friend?
…A sister?
What the hell. She never said a thing! Not even when I killed her!
I tried to respond, but the pressure around my neck and the agonizing pain in the rest of my body would not let me.
“Maybe you lost your mind on this island, too. Or maybe you came to this island because you’d lost your mind to begin with. I am curious, but I wanted to repay you because you helped me get closer to her.”
…Repay me?
“Lilei plans to toy with you for days. It would be only decent to save you, but I can’t forgive you for killing Fei. I only met Fei recently, you know. So I decided to compromise.”
What kind of crap is he spouting—
“I’ll just make it quick.”
—————————————————
“Bye.”
———————?
————————————?!?!?!
What happened to me?
I felt myself rising—the world turned upside-down—
The second I felt myself floating, a powerful force began to pull at me—
The irresistible force known as gravity.
I’m falling.
Down. Down.
Strangely enough, I was calm.
It felt like time had slowed around me.
A moment later, the memories of the past few days bubbled to the surface in clearer detail than before.
The girl I killed. Her gestures.
I saw the way she moved as she pointed at herself.
Now that I think about it, something was familiar about those movements.
…Oh. I get it.
Sign language.
…Maybe that girl couldn’t speak.
And when she heard I was looking for someone she knew—
Come to think of it…that alley she was trying to take me to…it leads straight to…to…
Oh. Oh!
Ahahahaha!
It’s here! It led here!
To this building!
What in the world did I do?!
She wasn’t trying to trick me! She was trying to take me to Lilei! She was just showing kindness!
But I misunderstood and ended up killing her!
Ah. I see. I understand.
My god…that’s what happened…
…
…
…
Then I guess I deserve to die here.
Because I killed someone without a good reason.
So I must accept this agony!
Because death is my punishment!
Punishment for my misunderstanding!
…That’s right. Other than that, everything I did was in the right!
I didn’t do anything wrong! My life was an upright one!
I can die with that understanding! Therefore I must have done nothing wrong!
…
But why is the world…so…slow…?
Why am I remembering the past? I’d ignored it all this time.
…
Oh, I see.
So this is how it feels to have your life flash before your eyes.
But the last thing I saw was not my past.
It was the ground, rapidly drawing near.
A rainbow-haired man and a black-haired man taking aim at one another.
Oh. I understand. I’m going to fall between them—
My memories continued. Specifically, they chased after me.
This is my final memory, and here I will—
That’s right. I finally understand.
Why I was so drawn to her.
Why she looked so familiar.
I understand! I finally know!
Why she wouldn’t leave my thoughts.
It’s her eyes eyes eyes eyes eyes eyes
Endlessly murky and endlessly pure eyes eyes eyes eyes eyes eyes eyes eyes
The girl I killed… the CEO’s dead daughter had the same eyes eyes eyes eyes eyes eyes
A hallucination rises out of the ground ground ground ground
The girl I killed rises up and reaches out to me me me me me no no no no no no my body body body body I’m sorry! It’s my fault! I was wrong! I admit it! I’m sorry please spare me forgive me the arms pulling at me no please forgive me I was was wa—
But a hallucination had no capacity for forgiveness.
A second before I landed, her hand touched my cheek.
Her hand touched my eye.
And something hot leapt into my eye socket—
my stomach my chest at the same time
cant even recognize
ohgodit’ssohotithurtsI’msorryithurtsitburns
brainfirstmyconsciousnessatonce
—crunch.
~My Heart-Pounding Nap Diary~
_______ __th, 2021.
I write diary. Write properly.
Misunderstand, Yakumo said.
Write properly. About yesterday.
Not-adorable person. Hurt Fei. Come to roof.
After die. Talk to Fei.
Fei cried. It hurt. She said. Died. She said. She cried.
I revenge. I promised.
No revenge, Fei in dark.
Break dark. With lead pipe. Happy.
So I broke.
I broke lots.
End. Yakumo dropped.
Died. Broke. Happy.
Sleeeeeep.
Fei happy.
Fei smiles.
We play. It is happy.
I sleep soon. Sleeeeeep. Hug. Hug.
The rooftop.
Without sparing a glance at the falling figure, the ghoul in white shrugged.
“Was that nosy of me?”
Lilei shook her head. “No. It is all right. Now it is.”
“I’ve never seen you kill someone so painfully before. Although I guess that’s natural, considering how much you cared for Fei.”
The girl seemed no different from usual.
Her voice. Her complexion. Her dead eyes. She was completely normal.
“He is bad dream. Break bad dream. Or not happy.”
“You can’t be happy?”
“Fei.”
“…I see. That’s sweet of you.”
The Killer Ghoul walked over to the stoic girl. He reached over between the flower ornaments and gave her a gentle pat on the head.
“It must have been hard on you, too. I think you could let yourself cry today, at least.”
“Why?”
“What do you mean ‘why’?”
“She is dead here. Not in dream. I see her anytime.”
Dragging her lead pipe loudly across the floor, she met the Killer Ghoul’s eyes.
“Adorable children. Must be happy. So Fei sleeps. Sleeps happily. With me. Always dreaming. So I kill. Not-adorable man. Breaks dreams.”
Then, she spun where she stood and walked over to the center of the roof—and with the lead pipe still in her grip, she sprawled out on the floor.
“So I sleep. Sleeeeeep. Hug.”
Seconds later, Lilei was snoring softly.
The Killer Ghoul, watching from a short distance, thought for a while. Then he came to a realization.
‘I see.
‘I always assumed Lilei couldn’t distinguish between dreams and reality.
‘But maybe she did try to distinguish between them. And maybe she concluded that they were one and the same.
‘So death doesn’t mean much to her.
‘Just like people don’t fear the void when they go to sleep.
‘Lilei isn’t
scared of the deaths of others.
‘She’s trying to override the nightmares of her reality with her dreams.’
From a logical perspective, it might seem like simple escapism.
But having spoken with the girl many times after becoming her nap friend, the young man realized that the signs were there all along.
“You’re an assassin, right?”
“I am.”
“Was there anyone you were reluctant to kill?”
“No. But when Elder Brother said. Kill you. It was lonely. Bye nap friend.”
“…You were pretty merciless, though. …Then what about someone else? One of those adorable kids you love so much? Like your friend Fei?”
“Elder Brother do not ask. From beginning. I say no. He knows.”
“But if you won’t do it, someone else will.”
“I save. If I can’t save. I apologize. In dream.”
“…?”
“People die. Die someday. But it is dream. Wake up someday. It is same. But I sleep. Dream again. So it is okay.”
“In other words, you’re a sad girl who can’t distinguish dreams from reality…”
“Do not want hear. From Killer Ghoul.”
Remembering that exchange, the Killer Ghoul thought.
Sleep was like death, he had said to her, handing her the journal. The girl had tilted her head curiously.
To her, there was no difference between dreams and reality, no difference between reality and death. Perhaps there was no difference between death and sleep worth mourning. Perhaps dreams—the state of nothingness in sleep—were a second life for her.
Wasn’t that something terribly sad?
She did not mourn her friend’s death, saying she could see her any time in dreams.
Was that really ‘living’?
‘Even if she loses a loved one…can Lilei not feel that sadness?
‘That’s heartbreaking, isn’t it?’
Perhaps she was the most broken individual on the entire island.
The Killer Ghoul looked into the sleeping girl’s face.
She looked happy.
She was at peace, as she never was while awake.
‘Maybe she looks as indifferent as ever in her dreams, though.’
The young man sighed. Though he felt pity for her, he wondered quietly if he was being too conceited. He lay down in a corner of the rooftop and looked up at the sky.
5656!_Knights' Strange Night Page 8