Pure Hearts

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Pure Hearts Page 13

by Jeannine Allison


  Now, as I was experiencing something that definitely didn’t feel like a first kiss, I knew I had been right. This was more.

  I retreated, tipping my head back against the door. Nick’s lips met the column of my throat, gentle and assured, while he whispered words of praise into my skin.

  “So soft.”

  “Gorgeous.”

  “How’d I stay away so long?”

  “We’re going to be late,” I murmured.

  Nick chuckled and stepped back from me. The only place we were touching now was his hands on my hips.

  “You don’t even know where we’re going or what we’re doing.”

  “True, but I still don’t want to be late for it.”

  He smiled, his thumbs applying extra pressure where they lay underneath my shirt, against my skin. “Let’s go then.”

  Grabbing my hand, he pulled me off the porch and down the driveway. I was in a daze as he opened my door and helped me in. He softly shut it before jogging around to his side of the car.

  When he slid into his seat and started the car, he glanced over at me and gave me a nervous smile. “Okay, so this date is… unconventional.”

  “We’re not going to a graveyard, are we?” I asked as he pulled into traffic.

  “What?” His startled eyes quickly flew to mine then went back to the road. “Did a guy actually take you there?”

  “Not me; a friend in college.” That’s what happens when you pick your date based on his toes…

  I crossed my legs and shifted my body so I was angled toward Nick. “No, my worst one was a third date. He took me to a wedding.”

  He shrugged. “That’s awkward and kinda fast, but not too bad.”

  “Ah-ah.” I held up my finger. “I wasn’t done. The wedding was for his ex-girlfriend.”

  “Hmm… well that’s definitely weird, but not necessarily—”

  “He wasn’t invited.”

  Nick chuckled. “Okay, that’s really bad.”

  I laughed, watching him throw me a flirty grin. “Yeah. It was a big wedding, so at first no one noticed us. But he seemed determined to make a scene.” I shook my head.

  “And second place goes to the guy who took me to a strip club. It was our third or fourth date and he thought it was time I met his regular dancer. He was even so generous as to offer her up to give me a lap dance.”

  “So the bar is set pretty low for me?”

  Grinning, I said, “My point was that this is a giant display of trust I’m exhibiting right now. I haven’t let a guy take me on a blind date in years.”

  “I’m honored.” Nick stopped at a light before bringing his hand over to cup my face. “I promise it’s nothing like any of that. But it’s not dinner and a movie, or a picnic in the park.”

  We were smiling at each other, his thumb lightly brushing over my cheekbone, when a horn blared behind us. Nick jumped, pulling his hand away and immediately slamming on the gas. With a shriek, I gripped the armrest and held on to my seat belt.

  “Sorry.” He gave me a sheepish look.

  “No worries.” Calla was a nervous driver so I was used to abrupt driving.

  I started paying better attention to our surroundings and… “Are we going to your apartment?”

  “Yup.”

  I looked at him out of the corner of my eye. I didn’t think his “unconventional” date would be a nooner at his place, but I was at a loss for what we might be doing.

  We spent the rest of the car ride in silence. When we arrived at his place, I unbuckled and reached for the door handle before he stopped me with his hand on my wrist.

  “Let me.” With a smile, he got out and jogged around the front of the car. Nick held the door open and offered his hand. He kept my hand in his as he shut and locked the doors. We walked up the path until we stood in front of his door.

  “Close your eyes,” he instructed while he put his key in the lock. Once they were shut, I heard the door squeak open before feeling Nick against my back, holding on to each hand and leading me over the threshold.

  His apartment smelled good, like coffee and pine. Definitely the work of a candle. Nick chuckled into my hair when I inhaled deeply.

  “You like?” he whispered.

  “Yeah. I didn’t picture you for a candle person.”

  Another laugh tickled my ear. “There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Iris.” He paused and when he spoke again there was a serious and wistful quality to his voice. “That’s my fault, but now I want you to know everything.”

  “Me too,” I whispered, aware of the lump in my throat.

  He shuffled us forward a bit more before moving to stand directly beside me.

  “Okay,” he said, and without the advantage of sight I could hear the nervous pitch to his voice. “You can look.”

  I opened my eyes and let my gaze float over the two rooms I was standing between, unsure of what I was seeing. To the left of us, where his couch was in front of his main window, there was a variety of things laid out on the coffee table. Small packs of tissues, deodorants, toothbrushes, toothpastes, tiny bottles of mouthwash and shampoo, and bars of soap.

  On the bar that separated the kitchen and the family room, there were stacks of blank copy paper, envelopes, and a roll of stamps.

  And on the far counter sat a bunch of ingredients, but I couldn’t make them all out from here.

  “What is all this?” I asked with a sweep of my hand.

  “Well… I thought we could do some volunteer work?” Nick awkwardly chuckled when the statement came out as a question.

  My breathing stalled. This couldn’t be…

  “None of this is terribly original. I just googled it and these seemed the easiest.” He walked over to the coffee table. “So over here we have a couple bathroom items.” He pointed to the backpacks on the ground that I hadn’t seen earlier. “I thought maybe we could make hygiene kits for homeless people. There’s also a blanket in the bottom of the backpack already. If you can think of anything I forgot we can always stop at the store before we hand them out.” Nick’s speech was hurried and he wouldn’t look at me.

  “And over here I thought we could write some letters to the troops…”

  I stopped listening. I didn’t mean to. I wanted to hang on every word he said. My gaze drifted over everything, and I couldn’t help it when tears pricked at my eyes. Who did something like this? This was perfect…

  I’d dated a few guys over the years, and most treated my need to volunteer or go out of my way to help people like Aster did. Sometimes they would treat me like a child, as if I didn’t understand, as if I was naive and didn’t know all the horrible things that could happen or what people could do. They were condescending.

  And the thing was, I didn’t need them to come with me or to want to help. But I hated the feeling that they were rolling their eyes behind my back. I knew they didn’t mean to be rude about it, but that almost made it worse. They genuinely thought I was a joke. I never truly admitted to myself or anyone else how much that hurt. Maybe I just hadn’t realized it until I was standing here in front of a man who may not understand this part of me but still treated it with respect.

  “Iris?” My head snapped up and I met his worried gaze. “Are you all right?”

  I wondered how long I’d zoned out for. “What? Yes, yes. Sorry. I’m great.” More than great.

  Nick’s lips pulled down. “Are you sure? I mean, if you’d rather do dinner and a movie, we can do that.” He ran his hand over his head and tugged at his hair. “Like I said, I know it’s nothing terribly original in terms of giving back…” He shrugged, like he was a little embarrassed. Like this wasn’t the nicest, most thoughtful thing anyone had ever done for me. “I thought… ah… never mind.” The tense smile he gave me broke my heart and immediately had me snapping out of the haze I was still floating around in.

  He had just turned toward the door when I grabbed his arm and pulled him back around. “No, I don’t want that. This is perfec
t, Nick.” I looked around the room once more. “Definitely the best date I’ve ever been on.”

  His features relaxed as his lips kicked up into a goofy grin. Nick’s fingers skated down my arm until he was holding my hand, giving it a light squeeze before he started talking. “The date hasn’t even started yet.”

  I stepped closer, removing my other hand from his bicep to touch my lips. “Really? My lips seem to a recall a rather spectacular kiss.” I frowned and looked down at his chest. “Maybe that was with another guy? It—”

  Nick’s mouth crashed down on mine without letting me finish, his lips stealing my air and thoughts all at once. This kiss was hungrier than before, like he was branding his lips on mine so I’d never be able to forget him. His tongue quickly demanded entrance, which I eagerly gave. My moan spurred him on and before I knew it, my hands were in his hair, his hands were cupping my ass and I was being lifted. My legs instantly wrapped around his waist as my back hit the wall.

  Nick’s body pinned mine, allowing his hands to roam. He slipped his palms under my shirt and softly caressed my hips. When I moaned, he broke away and started dropping kisses down my neck before coming back up and resting his lips against the shell of my ear.

  “Iris.” I shivered at the deep, dark way he said my name. It almost sounded like a threat, but I didn’t understand why, nor did I understand why it turned me on the way it did.

  “Who’s kissing you?” he whispered, his fingers ghosting over the skin along my stomach and causing me to tremble.

  “Whaaat…?”

  Nick chuckled as his fingers inched up toward my bra.

  “I said, who”—kiss—“is”—kiss—“kissing”—kiss—“you?”

  “Y-you?”

  “That’s right.” One hand moved a couple inches further and skimmed the side of my breast. I shuddered and my breathing hitched. “And the only way you won’t know it’s me is if you’re so out of your mind with pleasure that you don’t even know your own name.” His hand left my breast and moved around to my back before he drew a soft line down my spine. “Understood?”

  I nodded, only exhaling when he pulled his hands out of my shirt and gently set me on the ground. He stepped back and my gaze involuntarily dropped to the front of his pants.

  Clearing my throat, I stepped away from the wall. “Okay, so, uh, where do you want to start?”

  When I met his eyes, they were lingering on my body, clearly saying we’d already started. He wasn’t wrong.

  Oh boy… this was going to be a long day.

  “Where should we start?” I repeated, quickly adding, “And I want the non-pervy answer.”

  He grinned and pointed over his shoulder. “Maybe the cookies, since those will need to bake and cool.”

  “Cookies?”

  “Yeah.” Nick smirked. “Weren’t you paying attention?” Unabashed, I shook my head.

  Chuckling, he grabbed my hand and pulled me into the kitchen. “We’re making cookies to take to some firehouses.”

  “Gotcha,” I replied, looking over the ingredients.

  We spent the afternoon laughing and having fun. Nick had me do the baking, but he oversaw the whole thing so I didn’t “kill the firemen,” as he so nicely—and accurately—put it. He didn’t stand next to me or sit on a stool. Nick spent almost the entire time pressed against my back with his arms wrapped around me. And despite the close proximity, and him whispering in my ear half the time, it never felt sexual. It was just comfortable.

  After that, we sat at the counter and each wrote ten letters to troops overseas. At first I thought it might be awkward, that I would run out of things to say and repeat myself. But the words flowed easier than I expected. I’d just finished number ten when Nick announced he had to go to the bathroom and would be right back. He kissed me on the cheek, brushing his nose against mine before walking down the hall.

  Sucking in a breath, I tried to focus on anything other than the heat pulsing through me. My eyes landed on his letter; he’d flipped it over and shoved half of it underneath the others he’d already sealed shut. I knew I shouldn’t do it, but I reached forward anyway, slipping the paper free and turning it over. After looking over my shoulder to make sure he wasn’t coming, I froze. This wasn’t me, and if I was ashamed at being caught, that meant I shouldn’t be doing this. I turned around, ready to put it back, when I saw my name in the middle of the page.

  I started at the beginning of the paragraph, because even though it was wrong, I couldn’t tear my eyes away. My curiosity was too strong.

  You’re probably wondering why I’m writing you. I guess people write for all kinds of reasons. Mine’s probably the weirdest.

  There’s this girl. Isn’t there always? Her name is Iris and she’s… honestly, I don’t know that there’s a word for her. She’s completely unprecedented. You wouldn’t believe she was real. Sometimes I still don’t.

  Even how we met is completely insane… she gave me her kidney. A complete stranger. Even when I was a complete dick to her in the beginning, she didn’t care. She smiled. She never faltered in her decision.

  She’s incredible.

  And that’s why I’m writing you. We’re on our first date right now, and we’re doing different volunteer-type things. I was actually worried she would think it was lame or something. I don’t know why. She seems to be loving it.

  Iris may have brought me here, but I meant what I said at the beginning of this letter. I appreciate your sacrifice. I never thought of myself as a bad person—I’ve discretely bought breakfast for vets before, and a few other things that kept me behind the action. But she made me see the profound effect a personal touch can have, just knowing someone cares. Not just doing the bare minimum to make yourself feel better.

  So that’s what I’m saying… I want you to personally know how much I appreciate what you’re doing and the sacrifices you’ve made. If you’d like to keep talking, I’d love for our letters to continue. I’d love to read about the woman who’s changed your life, like Iris has changed mine.

  “It’s kinda nice knowing you’re not perfect,” Nick whispered behind me. I yelped and grabbed my chest. Once my heart calmed, I turned around, guilt written all over my face as I blindly placed the letter down behind me.

  “I’m so sorry. I just—”

  He leaned forward and cut me off with a quick kiss. “Relax. I don’t mind.”

  I stayed silent as I watched him finish the letter and tuck it away in the last envelope. Once he was done, we moved over to the couch and, with the soothing sounds of Adele in the background, packed up the care kits. The silence between us wasn’t awkward. It felt… right. Natural. Like this was our place and we did this every Saturday. I couldn’t stop the grin that crept up my face with that thought. I knew it was dangerous and presumptuous, but I couldn’t help how I felt.

  After we finished the letters, we arranged the cookies on several platters before we started loading up his car. It took us five trips. We had ten trays of cookies, twenty letters, and thirty backpacks. I shut the trunk after putting in the last load of bags while Nick locked his front door. We met at the passenger door. With a smile, he gently tipped my chin up and his lips met mine. It was another sweet, soft kiss that had my mind spinning and my heart pounding.

  I pulled back and leaned against the car, biting my bottom lip. His eyes flared as his gaze focused there.

  “Thank you, Nick. This was… amazing.”

  “Hey,” he murmured, putting his hands on my hips and drawing us together again. “It’s not over yet.”

  “What’s next?” I asked softly.

  “Well, I was going to suggest blood donation, but unfortunately I can’t because of my rejection meds. Besides, if you get weak in the knees I want to know I was the reason, not massive blood loss.” We both chuckled as he pushed a piece of hair behind my ear. My breath caught at the intimate gesture. I’d always been one of those girls who swooned more at the little things.

  “There’d be no dou
bt,” I whispered, my eyes trained on his lips, while I swayed into him for effect.

  “After we drop all this off I thought we could go to dinner. Unless you’re sick of me?” Nick asked with a grin.

  “So sick, actually.”

  I was still gazing up at him adoringly, so I wasn’t prepared when Nick reached around and pinched my butt—hard—causing me to yelp and reflexively slap his chest.

  He chuckled, and I couldn’t even stay mad. “I was right,” I said.

  “About what?”

  “This date. Sore butt aside—and yes, I know how that sounded. No dirty comments necessary,” I quickly added, slapping my hand over his grin before he could say anything. Nick kissed my palm. I smiled and pulled my hand away, revealing those dimples once more.

  “I knew this date would be perfect,” I finished. The date wasn’t the best I’d been on because he took me to a fancy restaurant and ordered the most expensive bottle of wine, or brought me to the hottest club, or gave me lavish flowers and candy.

  What made it perfect and romantic was how personal it was. How much thought he put into this. It seemed everything Nick did, he did with me in mind.

  And it wasn’t even halfway over.

  My palms were sweating as I sat in the passenger seat and watched him walk around the front of the car. We’d just gotten back from dinner and I was trying to figure out how to prolong the date. In reality it had been about seven hours, but it seemed to fly by. The butterflies in my stomach went crazy as Nick opened my door and held out his hand. I climbed out and he softly shut it behind me.

  “Hey.” He gave me a mischievous smile, grabbing my hips—those seemed to be becoming a favorite—and walking me backward until my back met the car door.

  “Hi,” I whispered back. He was still grinning down at me, when a cold blast of air blew by and I shivered.

  “Here.” Nick stepped back and pulled the wool black scarf he’d grabbed before we left from around his neck. I watched him lift it over my head and fit it around my neck. My heart practically melted as he gently lifted my hair so it wasn’t caught underneath. He didn’t see any of this. Nick missed all the feelings I was sure were blatant on my face, because he was too busy watching his hands. Like making sure I wasn’t cold and my hair wasn’t caught were the most important things to him.

 

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